Coming from a similar background I found support groups helpful as well as working with professionals (therapists, psychiatrists, nutritionists). Sometimes antidepressants make things worse (4 years of that), one thing I found useful was CBT or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Basically retraining your thought process to be more reasonable and positive and have a better outcome...like instead of "oh im going to fail why bother" and then not trying or just going through the motion you say "ok lets give this a shot and see what i can do" and actually trying harder at the task and feelling more accomplished
I have been dealing with severe depression and anorexia since I was 10 or 11. I was in and out of the hospital for self harm/suicide attempts/anorexia 10+ times. I tried over 20 medications and lots of therapy. Nothing helped.
I know this may seem drastic, but the only thing that helped me was ECT (electroconvulsive therapy or "shock therapy"). I started getting it when I was 15 or 16. At that point, I wouldn't eat unless someone was making me. I was suicidal and frequently self-harming. After a few treatments , I started noticing a big difference. In a few weeks, I remember calling my mom and telling her to come home so I could "show her" that I was eating ice cream (for the first time in years). As the depression lifted my ED thoughts began to recede. I still battle these thoughts, but things are so much better. I wouldn't be alive without ECT. It completely changed my life, with ver few side effects. It's painless and quick, with fast results. If you have any questions feel free to message me.
This is just something to think about but a friend of mine who has an ED (in recovery) had to stop using calorie counting / Diet websites because They became too triggering for her.
I think there are mental health support websites out there.. I suggest looking int those. I bet they could give you better help support to fit your needs (in conjunction with your doctor)
Also, have you talked to your Doc about Lamictal? Several Family members have had great success on this.