Motivation
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embarrassed about dieting


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I'm not sure if this is something anyone else has a problem with, but I'm so ashamed to admit to my friends and family that I am trying to diet.  I'm not sure how they will react, I mean, I know that they will support me as long as I am healthy and happy, but I still feel bad about admitting it.

anyone else in the same boat, or who has overcome this?
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I used to feel this way... But eventually you get over it.  Especially if you aren't just dieting but changing your eating habits permanently (and not temporarily).  Then it is no longer a "diet" but a lifestyle change.

I am eating healthy for the most part and trying to lose 20lbs but I don't see it as dieting because even when I reach my goal, I am going to continue to eat healthy and workout.

How much weight are you wanting to lose?
I have a better one...

I was more embarrassed about how much weight I have gained, so I have been avoiding quite a few of my friends.

Finally I decided that I've been dieting and I am working really hard...and truthfully I NEED their support.

So I sent an email to all of my friends and sent a bulletin to all of my contacts on mySpace and told ALL of them about my website and my journey to losing weight!

It was scary and exciting at the same time. But in the end I was really thrilled with how many people sent me notes telling me that they would be watching me and helping to hold me accountable for my weight loss goals. It was the greatest relief ever!

Chubby
i'm looking to loose 35lbs, orginally I thought it was only 30, but i've gained 5 since my last drs visit.

i suppose if i look at it has a change in lifestyle rather than just a diet it makes more sense.  I am trying to change my eating habits to loose weight and keep it off, and I'll keep the new eating habits even after I reach my goal.
 Everyone acted like I was insane when I started dieting. They didn't like how little I ate. Or what I wanted to eat instead of their meals....However, months later... Now. Now that I've lost all the weight I needed to.... They look to me and ask " What are you having? Oh, I'll have the same... "  Or " You don't eat that? I'm having what your having.. " So instead of it making you a reject.. or outcast from the group... later...  You'll be looked to for advice. Just stay focused. You can do it. =-D  They'll admire for your willpower.
i kinda feel that way...

i'm average weight but i would like to have a little less leg fat so i've hide my calorie counting from my parents. i feel that if they know they will be like " you need to eat more!" or even worse " yes you should stick to your diet" because that would mean they think i'm a little bigger than i was. 

i'm embarrassed to let them know but i'm more ashammed not being about to fit into pants i bought last fall. so i just choose that the jean embarrasment is worse.

hopeful i'll get to my goal and everything will turn out fine.
okay, tabathar, are you really embarrassed to be dieting or are you afraid to tell because because they'll hold you accountable?  or because they'll know if you don't pull it off?

if so, i've been there.  i didn't tell anyone i was trying to lose weight until i was down ~ 20 pounds.  i still haven't said anything to my best friend (who lives about 800kms away and is very skinny), and it might be because i'm afraid i'll gain it all back before i see her....
I'm the same way.. and it shouldnt be that way, cause im the skinniest amongst all my family memebers. But everytime i do it.. they bat an eye and then talk to me about it like IM the one who SHOULD be dieting when in reality they should be doing it along with me because their obese, im just trying to trim myself up
I definitely feel the same.  I'm at home with my mom for the summer, and she has no idea I'm making an effort to lose weight. 
I realized with my mom, I don't want to tell her because she'll get into my business, and probably try to help, and that just makes it harder for me to do it for myself. 

With friends, I think I'm embarrassed because admitting I'm trying to lose weight is like admitting that I'm fat, and that's SUCH an uncomfortable topic.

I think the best thing to do is be really casual about it.  If you're out to eat and you order something different, you can mention that you're trying to be be healthier, or make healthier choices.  That's all you're doing after all, isn't it?

I also find that it's a LOT easier to talk about what you're doing if you're explaining why you look GOOD. I don't think there's anything wrong with staying private about it for a while.


it's so easy to get defensive about it, though!  i told my parents in an email the other day that i was going to buy myself size 8 jeans.  then when they mentioned it on the phone, it totally pissed me off.  same thing the last time i was home for a visit: i hated that people didn't notice i'd lost, but then when someone did notice and comment on it, i didn't like that either.

it's pride, for me.  there's a part of me that still doesn't want to admit i needed to lose.  how neurotic is that?
I have 60 lbs to lose, well let me say now I have 50 lbs to lose cuz I have lost 10lbs!  Anyway it is embarressing, I feel fat!  But my parents discovered caloriecount.com and they have been losing weight.  My mom told me what she was doing and I have joined in, it's great we cheer each other on and share recipes and stuff.  I feel like by having others support it has really helped me!  I know what you mean Maria about others noticing.  To me losing 10 lbs is a big deal and I want everyone to notice.  People do say my face is thinning down.  It's weird you gain 10lbs and it is noticable but when you lose it it feels like you only saw the number on the scale move.  But I can tell my belly doesn't feel as big.  I ramble...
#11  
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Being tall, and having alot of naturally curvy friends when Im a bit flat made everyone always look at me as being thin regardless of how much I knew I had on (I started trying to cut back when I was starting to get a bit of flab around my belly) I didnt tell anyone, but my parents picked up on it really quickly. My friends all thought I was insane when I finally let them know I was trying to lose 10 lbs. Right now my parents are really good with the foods ive cut out and are taking tips from me to try to improve their lifestyles (though they still do get huge steak and potato dinners while I cook myself a piece of grilled tilapia on steamed veggies) Many friends still think Im crazy (alot got the freshman 15 recently) but two in particular are doing the same as me, so we all trade recipes (though Im the one who cooks them all ;P) The three of us made a deal that we wont tell eachother the often annoying 'youre perfect how you are' even if we think so, and we will be very blunt if we think any of us have lost too much.
thanks guys! big break through I decided to fill my boyfriend in on what I've been doing, kinda hard not to seeing as we live together, and he's actually real supportive and wants to help out to.  We're going to pick up some low-cal cook books so I can finally learn to cook, and cook healthy for us both.  But I'll probably hold off from telling my friends until there is a noticable difference.  Not neccesarily afraid of being held accountable but it'll be easier to say hey I'm doing this and Look how great I look now. 

Thanks!
I'm the exact same way! I don't know why but I feel embarassed telling ppl (or admitting I'm overweight). Even though ppl can see I need to lose weight I never discuss it with my friends (who are mostly all skinny anyway). I'm happy to have found this group so I have some ppl who can relate to me :)
I am exactly the same. I find it hard to admit that I'm on a diet and need to lose weight. There is such a stigma associated with being fat, despite the fact that everyone can SEE I'm fat.
Admitting that I need to lose weight brings the topic of my "fatness" out into the open, where it's really uncomfortable for all. 

The other day, one of the trainers at my gym came up to me and said that he could see a real difference in my body. He said "you're really starting to look voluptuous and sexy. You've made a lot of progress since you've been here." On the one hand I was thrilled that my hard work was starting to show, especially that it might be appreciated by this very good looking guy. On the other hand, I felt really embarrassed- it's almost like I was hoping people wouldn't have noticed my fatness in the first place. I felt busted and forced to confront the fact that when people see me (saw?) they see (saw?) a fatty. It was really weird.

I am extremely embarressed about it too!

I think it's that me trying to change my body and habits is admitting that I was messing up in the first place.

For me, I've found a new spin to put on my explanation;

1). I'm trying to eat to be HEALTHY
2). I'm training for a half marathon

the second one may or may not be true, i'll see when i get to next fall, i really just want to lose the weight and want an excuse to work out all the time....
I didn't say anything to anyone except my partner. After I'd lost 50 lb, people did start to notice, plus they noticed me walking around the campus at work instead of sitting in my office during lunch. Everyone at work and even my neighbors have been quite supportive of my efforts. 
I understand completely.  I haven't told anyone and don't really plan too.  I've always been a healthy eater and always athletic...I just need to drop 50lbs. 

I don't like any extra attention, so in some ways what I'm most worried about is that I'll loose weight and everyone will keep talking about it.  It sounds crazy, but I don't really want to hear "Wow, you look great" or "Have you lost weight?"
Don't be embarassed! Your friends and family are our best means of support - they won't laugh at you, they'll RESPECT you for taking a stand.

If there's any example I could give, today's one will show you that the people around you can help you more than even they know.

I was sitting at work with a colleague. She's tall and slim and very careful about what she eats but worries that she's putting on weight (not that you would know it!) and I'm short and fat and have only been dieting six months. Despite this lifestyle gap, we share healthy eating tips and plans.

Anyway, I was sitting with her talking about my recent slump in motivation and my horror at putting on 2 pounds, and she said that I should stick to it and be really pleased with myself for what I have lost (about 14 lbs). She said that I looked loads better, but she'd not wanted to mention it because she didn't want to offend me about how I looked before.

Now I'm home and I'm really trying with my diet again and all because of a nice throwaway comment from a friend.

Not to mention my family and friends who everyday feed my determination by commenting on how much better I look.

So yeah - if they care for you they'll support you! Dieting in secret is never good because it's easy to give up when no one knows and there will be more temptation because no one knows that you can't eat badly.

Good luck!
I feel the same way sometimes.. but when I bring up to my friends or family how much weight I've lost they are SO supportive and happy. It makes you feel awesome to have what you're doing appreciated! Don't be embarassed :)
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