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A bit of Biblical advice for the single ladies of the Lounge


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To all the girls who are in a hurry to have a boyfriend or get married, a piece of Biblical advice: " Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz." While you are waiting on YOUR Boaz, don't settle for any of his relatives; Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheating-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az, Cheap-az, Lockedup-az, , Goodfornothing-az, Lazy-az, and especially his third cousin Beatinyo-az. Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz....

OK, its not original, and is is basically the advice others here will give you, but I found it amusing.

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Original Post by nomoreexcuses:

Even Pat Robertson says it's OK to get a divorce if your spouse is diagnosed with Alzheimer's.

But... it seemed like there was some confusion about the term apple-shaped.

Someone who wears apple bottom jeans (and boots with the fur) is actually a pear shaped woman - a woman with a smaller waist than hips.

An apple shaped woman usually has slim legs and minimal hips/butt and carries more weight around her waist.

 

 Nomo, tru dat!

Original Post by kotov_syndrome:

Original Post by moonikins:

Heh! When I first saw the title of this thread, I didn't open it because I thought someone was really quoting biblical advice for women. I figured I'd get irate so I stayed away. I was surprised when I read it. I sort of found it slightly amusing and annoying at the same time.

 That was kind of my reaction, too. I actually opened this thread with a rather "Oh-no-you-di'nt" attitude.

You and I are too much alike! I like that fact.

Original Post by nomoreexcuses:

Even Pat Robertson says it's OK to get a divorce if your spouse is diagnosed with Alzheimer's.

But... it seemed like there was some confusion about the term apple-shaped.

Someone who wears apple bottom jeans (and boots with the fur) is actually a pear shaped woman - a woman with a smaller waist than hips.

An apple shaped woman usually has slim legs and minimal hips/butt and carries more weight around her waist.

 

Ah yes, I confused my apples and pears. They both taste so good.

Healthy weight apple-shaped women look just fine... so his statement still makes no sense.

Original Post by santonacci:

Original Post by amethystgirl:

Yeah, I wasn't really sure how the "single mom" fit in with the rest.

 It's something that most single guys probably don't want to have to deal with.  Even if there's no money implications, it's another variable to factor into a relationship, and will greatly affect the woman's availability, both emotionally and physically. 

And it may not entirely be that superficial, either.  My husband works with a guy who now has a "no single moms" policy because of a relationship that went bad, and it tore him and the kid up.  He doesn't want the potential to put a kid through that again.

 Hmmm..

Santo said something very true and spot on target.  Impressed slightly.

Yes, most men would find a single woman without a child preferable to a single woman with one (or more).  Just as most women would feel the same.  Don't take my word for it...it can be easily tested.  Simply find a website that specializes in hooking up single people.  One of the search criteria has to do with whether or not the other person has children.  That is "not" because there's a huge group of people wanting to meet someone that is divorced and paying child support with a toxic X-wife situation.  And the only guys that would use that as a "positive" would be guys looking for single moms because they tend to be more "desperate" and willing to "settle".

I've dated a single mom before...and would do it again.  But it was a "negative" on the list, just one I chose to overlook on account of her having a very nice boob job and she was sexy as hell(o)... 

I think people who are single and never married tend to prefer other people who are single and never married.  Most young women don't seem to view a divorced guy (average income) as a "catch" and don't want to deal with that "baggage" or being the "second wife".

And yes, I know it's a generalization and ther are TONS of different variables...  For example, if I was single/divorced...I'd be trying to get my foot in the door at every single parents meeting and divorced support group in a 50 mile radius.  Not because that's a "positive trait" to me...but because I think those type of women tend to have lower standards and be more desperate.  And lower standards = getting laid in CCat world.  Yum yum.

And yes nomo, I thought "apple-shaped" meant "round".  I actually don't know what apple bottom jeans are.  I'm not up to speed on my Hip Hop/R&B.  I would consider Rosanne Barr or Nel Carter to be "apple shaped" while most average women and even somebody like a J-Lo would be more "Pear-shaped".

...if you aren't up to speed how did you know that 'apple bottom jeans' is a Hip Hop reference?

Original Post by caloricat:

 Not because that's a "positive trait" to me...but because I think those type of women tend to have lower standards and be more desperate. 

 While that might be true with some, I would think it's just as likely those women would have higher standards, depending on the circumstances that made them single.

I don't know about other women, but I know if I found myself single, I would be pretty freakin' demanding of a potential mate - or at least it might seem that way.  Sure, I might be longing for some adult companionship, but I'm also not so neglectful of a mother that I would expose my children to anyone who wasn't really worth my time, or anyone who wasn't willing to put in the effort to get to know and understand a special needs child.

But I may not be typical - at the very least, I think you'd be rolling the dice with that strategy, ccat.

Original Post by kathygator:

...if you aren't up to speed how did you know that 'apple bottom jeans' is a Hip Hop reference?

 One of the other posters mentioned it.

See, there was this one really hot chick that I met once.  I wasn't single, but I thought "if I was"...dammmm....

But here's the thing (and it relates to santo's thing above, not just a random story)...she had two kids.  One a daughter about my daughter's age.  Cute little girl...all that.  But her son was like developmentally messed up or something.  I mean, he had to wear a helmet and sit in a wheelchair and all that.

Now, in THAT case....I would "want" to hook up with her...because she was smokin hot...and I'd be tempted because I know a lot of guys would get scared off so I would have better chances/odds...  But I would feel really weird and akward.  And I'd actually feel "bad" if the relationship got serious because I just couldn't do that.  I'm not sayin it to be a Bhole, I WISH I COULD do that...I admire people who are able to raise developmentally challenged kids.  I just couldn't.  I can't even stand it when I'm around one...just because I feel so bad for them. 

And people say, "well, had your daughter grown up like that, you'd have adjusted."  But I don't think that's true.  I think she was born normal because God knew I wouldn't be able to handle that, that I would be completely incapable.

Heh. Just admit it: you googled.

As I said in my original post, I copied it.  The message was mostly to wait for someone that respects you and treats you well.  It really isn't that much to ask.

I have to agree with ccat that lumping someone who is broke with wife-beaters and cheaters is wrong.  I think guys should probably avoid Boaz's relatives listed in the OP as well andcrazy-az and wants-a-sugar-daddy-az are good addititions, but some of the list a bit mean-spirited and just personal taste.

Anyway, I am glad that most of you got a laugh out of it.

How did I miss all this good stuff.

I must be a blind-az

50 Replies (last)
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