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Husband hates my cooking, not like his mamas!


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I just made a meatloaf recipe last night that I have made once before and I think it tastes great, probably my favorite so far.  Well, my husband at it once before too, and never really commented.  He's not big into food, he's skinny and just doesn't LOVE food they way a lot of us do.  He could take it or leave it.  Well, he didn't know the first time what all ingredients went into the meatloaf.  So last night he happens to be in the kitchen when I'm putting it all together and he sees the oatmeal and freaks out and says I've ruined it.  His mama makes it with crackers and ketchup for the sauce.  I use chili sauce on top, altho in addition to my recipe (the Biggest Loser meatloaf) which calls for ketchup mixed in with the other stuff.  I had recently asked his sister how they made it, just out of curiosity because there are only a gazillion versions.  He thought I was trying to learn how to make meatloaf the RIGHT way.  I get so sick of him rejecting my perfectly GOOD cooking just because it isn't like his mama made it. I've noticed my dad do this to my mom quite a bit growing up, and my dad's mother made BLAND food that I could hardly stand to eat growing up.  Plus my mom can't try new things/recipes.  My husband also freaks out on me when I try new things.  What REALLY burns me up is that I cook, I do the grocery shopping, I ALWAYS wash the dishes, so I should really say, screw YOU, DH, I get to do things my way.  I've told him to get in the kitchen and cook if he doesn't like what I make. 

Does anyone else have a similar issue with their husband?  I really don't have the extra time or grocery budget to make two different meals.  Plus my husband has no interest in eating healthier, while I'm trying to lose a few lbs. and you know how challenging that can be sometimes when you have to tailor a meal to your family and not just for yourself. 

Any advice for a wife about to go crazy?

100 Replies (last)
Original Post by pavlovcat:

Original Post by moonikins:

Any DIL I have will know that I hate the canned cranberry jelly crap. She will know that I will either make homemade and bring it or just not eat the canned crap.

If I'm making the dinner at my house, no canned cranberry jelly sauce will be served, even if someone brings a can of it to my house and asks me to open it. They can take it home and eat it there.

I did this at Thanksgiving regarding ham. I do not see ham as a thanksgiving meal. I want turkey. I was cooking the turkey. We only had 5 people. We did not need ham. The MIL asked if she should bring a ham and I had no problem saying we didn't need a ham with 5 people because we were having a large turkey.

 Stubborn much?  :D

 You can always tell a German, but you can not tell 'em much.

I think's hysterical that he obviously loved it, UNTIL he found out it's not the same recipe as his Mothers...LOL. Because of this, I'd tell him if he doesn't want to eat it fix his own :)

Original Post by rachd:

I think's hysterical that he obviously loved it, UNTIL he found out it's not the same recipe as his Mothers...LOL. Because of this, I'd tell him if he doesn't want to eat it fix his own :)

Isn't this normal behavior for a husband?

Original Post by rosieblue:

Original Post by rachd:

I think's hysterical that he obviously loved it, UNTIL he found out it's not the same recipe as his Mothers...LOL. Because of this, I'd tell him if he doesn't want to eat it fix his own :)

Isn't this normal behavior for a husband?

If it is, I'm never getting married.

Original Post by rosieblue:

Original Post by rachd:

I think's hysterical that he obviously loved it, UNTIL he found out it's not the same recipe as his Mothers...LOL. Because of this, I'd tell him if he doesn't want to eat it fix his own :)

Isn't this normal behavior for a husband?

 Hehe, it makes me think of a Chef Boyardee commercial I saw where the dad was about to point out to his kid that the ravioli had a full serving of vegetables in it, but the mom shut him up, so their kid would keep eating the ravioli.

Ignorance is bliss?

Men are tender creatures.

They are used to things being a certain way, and they fear change. It's a genetic function of survivalism.

They make what, in their minds, is the ultimate sacrifice of their liberty by even wedding in the first place, choosing you over all those other women they were probably going to encounter that are absolutely yearning to make meatloaf the way they like it, and that are all put together like Elle MacPherson.

In addition, they have all had at least one woman in their past that broke their hearts, and while they know you aren't that way, they are still somewhat bewildered and unsure of their way in the world.

It is for us to school them gently, bring them along carefully into new things.

Original Post by kathygator:

Men are tender creatures.

They are used to things being a certain way, and they fear change. It's a genetic function of survivalism.

They make what, in their minds, is the ultimate sacrifice of their liberty by even wedding in the first place, choosing you over all those other women they were probably going to encounter that are absolutely yearning to make meatloaf the way they like it, and that are all put together like Elle MacPherson.

In addition, they have all had at least one woman in their past that broke their hearts, and while they know you aren't that way, they are still somewhat bewildered and unsure of their way in the world.

It is for us to school them gently, bring them along carefully into new things.

Yep, and then whack them with strange meatloaf when they're most comfortable.

My bf is like your husband in that he does not get excited over food, but he does say good things. Doesn't compare me to his mom. But I'm not his wife and we don't live together, so when I go out of my way to cook for him, it better be appreciated. So many women can't boil water nowadays, a man needs to be excited that his wife at least wants to. But I can't force him to like stuff, so sometimes I guess you just have to lose a battle. I don't like my cooking insulted though. Smile

Remind me to go home and hug my man.  He does 90% of the cooking and his food is so good (used to work in restaurants).  He will pretty much cook me anything I want whenever I want it.

Original Post by rosieblue:

Original Post by kathygator:

Men are tender creatures.

They are used to things being a certain way, and they fear change. It's a genetic function of survivalism.

They make what, in their minds, is the ultimate sacrifice of their liberty by even wedding in the first place, choosing you over all those other women they were probably going to encounter that are absolutely yearning to make meatloaf the way they like it, and that are all put together like Elle MacPherson.

In addition, they have all had at least one woman in their past that broke their hearts, and while they know you aren't that way, they are still somewhat bewildered and unsure of their way in the world.

It is for us to school them gently, bring them along carefully into new things.

Yep, and then whack them with strange meatloaf when they're most comfortable.

Exactly. Just when you have them wondering which end is their arse and which is their head... whammo - unexpected meatloaf revisions.

Of course it always helps to throw the hormone card too, because they are stupefied by the workings of the feminine hormonal system.

Serve him meatloaf in fishnets and lingerie

 

Edit:  You could wear them too.

*ba-dum ching* :)

My MIL always cooks the same dish - rice, beans and fried meat (she is Dominican), but does it very good. So, I would cook anything else but rice and beans. I honestly tried and did a very good job, but got the same "my mom does it better" response. On the flip side, he and my MIL stand ten steps below my mom's cooking, but that's not a reason  for me to critisize DH efforts, he is not my mom, and I am not his. I think the problem is a lack of diplomatic skills in men in general, but somebody has to be adult about it, most of the time it's me. If I get 'my mom does it better', I would say: 'of course she does, I will ask her to teach me!', he will be one happy man and we will have pleasant dinner.

Original Post by rosieblue:

Original Post by kathygator:

Men are tender creatures.

They are used to things being a certain way, and they fear change. It's a genetic function of survivalism.

They make what, in their minds, is the ultimate sacrifice of their liberty by even wedding in the first place, choosing you over all those other women they were probably going to encounter that are absolutely yearning to make meatloaf the way they like it, and that are all put together like Elle MacPherson.

In addition, they have all had at least one woman in their past that broke their hearts, and while they know you aren't that way, they are still somewhat bewildered and unsure of their way in the world.

It is for us to school them gently, bring them along carefully into new things.

Yep, and then whack them with strange meatloaf when they're most comfortable.

and that is all that anyone needs to know about meatloaf. in lingerie and fishnets. :)

I wouldn't be too impressed with my partner's criticisms when he didn't do anything to contribute to the meal, but I don't know what the division of labour is like in your house ... if your husband is taking care of his fair share of the chores it might not be fair to ask him to take on the cooking as well (at least that's how it is in my house).

If you're still willing to be in charge of feeding him, maybe make a large quantity of a recipe he likes, divide it into meal-sized portions, and stick it in the freezer. Then if you try something new and it's not his cup of tea, he can just defrost an old standby.

You might have missed where I already said I do make several meals, usually each week that are specifically to my husband's liking.  No, that is the right thing to do, to make something the way he likes it.  But he expects EVERY meal to be HIS way, altho he does no shopping, cleaning, cooking, and he shows almost no appreciation for my work.

Thanks, I feel like no one hardly was getting my side of this. 

This is probably because I'm just a newlywed, but my husband adores my cooking. Granted, his cooking skills are limited to the rice cooker and bbq-ing, but no matter how disastrous an experiment of mine goes, he eats it and praises it.

I feel so spoiled.

But he would never, ever mock me for my cooking or criticize it unless I insulted it first. That just kinda seems like a mean, unloving thing to do....

Is it just because I'm a newlywed?

Original Post by hcannon23:

You might have missed where I already said I do make several meals, usually each week that are specifically to my husband's liking.  No, that is the right thing to do, to make something the way he likes it.  But he expects EVERY meal to be HIS way, altho he does no shopping, cleaning, cooking, and he shows almost no appreciation for my work.

 Yeah, that's not cool. I assume you've talked it out with him already? Tell him that he's simply being disrespectful?

Yes, oh and get this, for lunch I had just one serving, a big one at that though, left of the meatloaf.  I purposefully sat down after reheating it and enjoyed every bit and when he saw it he asked if there was anymore. 

I guess I should mention my husband is a strange creature, who when upset over one thing, he makes an issue over something else, which really isn't the real problem.   But I did find it hilarious that he wanted to eat the leftovers AGAIN.

100 Replies (last)
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