"That's so gay!"

 Is this phrase not pc or does it depend on what you're referring to? For example,

"Loving Glee is so gay". Or if you see some guy rocking an Adam Lambert look and you say to your friend, "That's so gay". What if you have gay friends and support Gay/Lesbian rights? Would you be offensive in making that statement? 

Do you have to be gay or bi to be able to say it and not be offensive?

Is this phrase similar to the "N" word in rap song or friends who use the "N" word, while referring to each other affectionately?

If you're not of African heritage, is it offensive to sing the part of a song that uses the "N" word, if you're in your car or alone and you love the song (Ima Be-unrated version)? For me, that's the only time I use the "N" word, but I use "That's so gay" out in public when I'm talking to my husband.

 Also, my kids told me that the phrase, "That's the pot calling the kettle black" and using the phrase, "It's like black and white" as a basis for comparison (e.g. Technology vs. the Amish way of life) is racist. Is that true? 

 Oh, I'm in love with Victor Smalley and I'm not a gay man :( . He's so awesome! 

I think I slip and say it occasionally, but it's not a phrase I use a lot...I think I said it more when I was younger.

One of my best friends is a lesbian, and honestly, I hear her say it more than anyone.

One of my best friends is gay, but very shy and conservative. He's the opposite of a flamboyant gay guy...and he happens to be dating a very cute, very prissy and fabulous little guy. One night, we were at dinner and discussing what we were going to wear on an upcoming cruise...

Friend's BF: And I'm going to get us some little cute beach sweaters, like the crocheted ones?

Friend: Yes of course...because we're just THAT gay.

Idk why but it struck me as so funny.

I loves him.

I use that phrase.  Even around my gay parents.