Women who say they don't like other women-enter at your own risk
Ok this is a rant. I really hate when women say this. Really? You can't get along with 50% of the population?? Are you that awful?
I have a friend who says this. I'm apparently the "chosen one" or something. I've heard it all-I only like "guy" things, I don't like shopping for shoes LIKE ALL OTHER WOMEN, women are [insert your stupid reason here] blah blah blah
If you venture into this thread and tell me why you're such a special snowflake who only hangs out with guys because you just don't like women I'll mock you until my thread gets pulled.
Original Post by pgeorgian:
strange. all my close friends are women and i work in a female-dominated field. i don't have a single woman in my life who is anything like what becs and gilt describe. and as spiro pointed out, i am the common denominator in my life.
A lot of social workers are women but I believe it takes a very strong woman to be able to remain in your line of work. I do know a few women who have become social workers/gone to school for social work and quickly changed fields because they realized they couldn't handle the stress.
Unfortunately, few of us get to choose who we work with. I believe the job I was in & the criteria the boss was looking for (young and pretty) are the reason that there were so many dramatic, unprofessional women in that workplace. I got out of there as soon as I could, as did most of the other employees who were there to work and earn a living, and not cause unnecessary drama. I am the common denominator in my life, that 1 short-lived job was certainly not my life and definitely not my choice. After that experience, I would be extremely reluctant to take a job where I was working with only females. Unless it was in an a career where I could assume the females there would be, for the most part, professional. On the other hand, I would take a job working with predominantly men under almost any circumstance and not have any hesitations.
Original Post by pgeorgian:
Original Post by pgeorgian:You don't think Men are less drama? They are so straight forward. There is never a "what did you mean by that," or a "he/she looked at me funny." It's always at face value. Women on the other hand in general have a tendency to get caddy and emotional about things. Makes things too complicated. That being said, I have many female friends, but they all tend to be the same type...straight forward, ambitious, do what they say...etc. No phony bologna.
i don't think drama is gender specific, and i'm selective about who i call "friend." i don't waste time with people who aren't authentic.
just wanted to add, justagirl, that you might want to consider the possibility that you're the one generating the drama. just based on my observations of what happens around you here.
Wow! I didn't start this one. I just stated my opinion! Damn, I can't even breathe in these forums. Talk about Public Enemy Number One!
Original Post by justagirl1:
Original Post by pgeorgian:justagirl, that you might want to consider the possibility that you're the one generating the drama.
Wow! I didn't start this one. I just stated my opinion! Damn, I can't even breathe in these forums. Talk about Public Enemy Number One!
Guess that answers that.
I've been in a few offices where the women were catty and there was a lot of back stabbing and gossiping. I got sucked into it at one place when I was younger.
I think this happens in an office situation where the women are in dead-end jobs. The work has become dull and repetitious. They can't move up unless they go back to school. Most don't want to do that or can't or think they can't. It leads to boredom. It also leads to them wanting more control. They feel the need to control something, so they control the social.
Original Post by santonacci:
Original Post by heatherkparks:
I have no problem with women, but I've found that most of them (in my area) have no desire to spend time with me.
I'm not a very social person in general, I don't like 'small talk.' When I do want to talk, its usually about guitars or music in general, or art, or history, or politics, or philosophy, or geeky scientific stuff.
FWIW, Heather, I think I would totally enjoy hanging with you.
Me too Heather, I think you said everything I think and feel about the subject much better than I ever could have. 
Original Post by spirochete:
Original Post by justagirl1:
You don't think Men are less drama? They are so straight forward. There is never a "what did you mean by that," or a "he/she looked at me funny." It's always at face value. Women on the other hand in general have a tendency to get caddy and emotional about things. Makes things too complicated. That being said, I have many female friends, but they all tend to be the same type...straight forward, ambitious, do what they say...etc. No phony bologna.Saying something like this is a reflection of YOU, not of women. Making a sweeping generalization like "men are less drama" is extraordinarily ignorant and immature.
Let me preface everything I type by..."IN GENERAL, THE NORM, IN MY OPINION, etc., etc." So that the masses are okay with what I type.
I've had good and bad experiences with both and have had friends with both genders. I think alot of it has to do with individual personalities as well a person's experiences in life. If someone has had only bad exeperiences with one particular group (insert any group, not just gender) they are more likely to generalize that to all members of the group even if many of them don't fall in to that category.
I pride myself on being able to get along with almost anyone, however I really do not care for the drama lovers, the queen bee types, the backstabbers and the super girly. Many of the things I like fall in to the stereotypical male things, but I have female friends who also like them, just not as many women as men are into sci fi, explosions, action movies ( I much prefer over rom coms and other so called chick flicks), and other guy stuff.
I like shopping, but only for certain things, things I would use or want. I don't wear make up, nylons, dresses or jewelery. I'm not big on cute shoes, I prefer ones that are practical (save for dressy occasions where sneaker or work boots won't cut it).
I grew up mostly around guys, but did have female friends once I got to school.
I just refuse to play in political games at work or anywhere else, I love being able to rant about things, but I also prefer to do something about them, but I hate it when people whine and you offer them a solution but they reject every possible solution because they prefer to whine about it. While most of my experiences with that have been women, I've also seen it in men, especially my ex, one of the reasons he IS my EX.
I do think girls and boys are brought up differently when it comes to a team dynamic, which I think is unfortunate.
Original Post by kathygator:
I do think girls and boys are brought up differently when it comes to a team dynamic, which I think is unfortunate.
This is so true. And it is usually to the detriment of women.
Almost all of my friends are male, but I wouldn't say that's because I hate women. I'm just more comfortable around men.
The two close girl-friends I have in my life generally are on the same page as me and that's probably why I only have two close female friends. I choose to surround myself with people who I share a common interest with. Plus, I'll be the first to admit I am socially awkward.
And yeah, sometimes it is just a matter of liking 'guy things.' I am so not a girly-girl and sorta have a low tolerance for high-maintenance people, which just so happen to all be women in my line of work, so it's hard to make new friends in general. I enjoy drinking beer and hitting golf balls. I like watching sports, getting my hands dirty. I went to a vocational/trade school for high school where the boys definitely outnumbered the girls so maybe that played a big part as well.
Who knows, it could be that I just feel uncomfortable around certain women because I'm not like them. I wouldn't say I'm insecure exactly, but sometimes my lack of femininity makes me feel like the blacksheep.
I think the more you experience in your life emotionally is the indicator of how much you like other women. There are things a woman goes through where she needs her sisters (related or not), and those are the experiences that make women close.
And now I'm going to call my friend to find out if she has breast cancer or not.
Sending energy for you both, Rosie. :/
Original Post by moonikins:
Original Post by kathygator:
I do think girls and boys are brought up differently when it comes to a team dynamic, which I think is unfortunate.
This is so true. And it is usually to the detriment of women.
Agree.
Also, I think some women come into the work place thinking they need to be like men because of the notion that a woman's abilities are somehow lacking and not as effective.
I don't buy the notion that business is not personal. If it's among humans, it's personal.
Glad you got a laugh. Go ahead and go back and read how I start all my posts in threads. Nothing is personal, I don't attack anyone, I don't single anyone out. I keep it all general. It's the respondents who make it personal and love to clobber me for my opinion. I just go into a thread, state my circumstances/opinion on the topic and because I don't agree with the masses, I become the primary target to hate.
I most likely don't agree with the respondents not because they say "A" and I say "B." I don't agree with most because the truth is I see most things black and white, very cut throat and unemotional. It's the respondents who can't deal with such and harsh view that make it all dramatic and try to provoke me. For the most part, I've held my own. I have lost it once on here, but I won't make that mistake again.
Original Post by kathygator:
Original Post by moonikins:
Original Post by kathygator:
I do think girls and boys are brought up differently when it comes to a team dynamic, which I think is unfortunate.
This is so true. And it is usually to the detriment of women.
Agree.
Also, I think some women come into the work place thinking they need to be like men because of the notion that a woman's abilities are somehow lacking and not as effective.
I don't buy the notion that business is not personal. If it's among humans, it's personal.
Well to be fair, in many circumstances the women have to act more like men or they don't get a chance to move up the chain. By this I mean being more competitive, not show any emotion, etc. Then they get labelled a bitch for not being feminine enough.
Original Post by justagirl1:
Glad you got a laugh. Go ahead and go back and read how I start all my posts in threads. Nothing is personal, I don't attack anyone, I don't single anyone out. I keep it all general. It's the respondents who make it personal and love to clobber me for my opinion. I just go into a thread, state my circumstances/opinion on the topic and because I don't agree with the masses, I become the primary target to hate.
I most likely don't agree with the respondents not because they say "A" and I say "B." I don't agree with most because the truth is I see most things black and white, very cut throat and unemotional. It's the respondents who can't deal with such and harsh view that make it all dramatic and try to provoke me. For the most part, I've held my own. I have lost it once on here, but I won't make that mistake again.
Just the fact that you had to dredge this up from a couple of pages ago to repsond pretty much proves their point. The conversation has moved on and yet you're going back to prove your point over and over. If that isn't a type of drama, I don't know what is.
Original Post by terrilicious:
Original Post by santonacci:
Original Post by heatherkparks:
I have no problem with women, but I've found that most of them (in my area) have no desire to spend time with me.
I'm not a very social person in general, I don't like 'small talk.' When I do want to talk, its usually about guitars or music in general, or art, or history, or politics, or philosophy, or geeky scientific stuff.
FWIW, Heather, I think I would totally enjoy hanging with you.
Me too Heather, I think you said everything I think and feel about the subject much better than I ever could have.
Thanks guys, that made me feel better today.
Santonacci, I can tell just by your profile pic that you and I would probably get along great in real life.
re #75: Agree Moonie. And I also find that unfortunate.
Original Post by justagirl1:I most likely don't agree with the respondents not because they say "A" and I say "B." I don't agree with most because the truth is I see most things black and white, very cut throat and unemotional. It's the respondents who can't deal with such and harsh view that make it all dramatic and try to provoke me. For the most part, I've held my own. I have lost it once on here, but I won't make that mistake again.
see my post #4. this is you.
Original Post by justagirl1:
Glad you got a laugh. Go ahead and go back and read how I start all my posts in threads. Nothing is personal, I don't attack anyone, I don't single anyone out. I keep it all general. It's the respondents who make it personal and love to clobber me for my opinion. I just go into a thread, state my circumstances/opinion on the topic and because I don't agree with the masses, I become the primary target to hate.
I most likely don't agree with the respondents not because they say "A" and I say "B." I don't agree with most because the truth is I see most things black and white, very cut throat and unemotional. It's the respondents who can't deal with such and harsh view that make it all dramatic and try to provoke me. For the most part, I've held my own. I have lost it once on here, but I won't make that mistake again.
Do you think that someone laughing at something they find ironic is an "attack" against you?
I'm asking so I can understand.
