Weight Loss
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Dealing with family & friends who think you are obsessed with wt loss.


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Does anyone else deal with family member or friends thinking you are obsessed with losing weight & if so, how do you respond to them?

Today I talked to my brother who I am very close to...we were laughing & having a good time & then he got all serious & said, "I need to have a serious talk with you about your obsession with losing weight. It is going to far & I just want to help you."  - This totally threw me for a loop!

I was shocked, because for the first time in my life I am losing weight the right way & my brother was basically telling me that I need help. I tried telling him that although I am really focused on being healthy right now, I am by no means doing it unhealthy.  The next thing he said was, "I am here for you. I am going to send you some pictures of models with their ribs sticking out. You need to think about what you want for yourself" He was seriously talking to me like I had a problem- What the heck...does anyone else deal with things like this?
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I don't have this problem of course I haven't told anybody about my CC either;).

Does what your brother said have any truth to it at all?
Ahhh!! My mom said the same thing to me. Which is ironic since she's the one eating 300 calories a day.... *cough* Well, I basically told her that CC was helping me to be healthy and counting calories, grams of fat, protien, carbs, there's nothing wrong with that. However, it definitely comes off as obsessive... which is why they're saying things in the first place, I suppose. Hm.. good question.
I have the same problem!  My mom pulled me aside to let me know that I should go 'into maintenance mode', and stop being so careful about my food.

I get very frustrated, because the truth is - I cannot go back to the way I was before - ever!  Before, I would stuff my face with fast food, chips, and ice cream. 

I let my mom know how healthy I am being.  I told her that my obsession is necessary right now, and that by counting my calories, I am actually able to eat *more*!

She was understanding.  She just doesn't understand about nutrition, and healthy eating.  After I explained things to her, I think she felt better.
The only reason my family is being "understanding" right now is because I said I wanted to lose weight for my wedding.  This blows my mind because why is it okay to lose weight to get married when at any other time they'll say I look just fine or that I'm too thin?  I'm in the 130s but people will assume that I'm around 110-115. 

Honestly though, it's not just for the wedding.  After I turned 34, I noticed that I was gaining weight at an impossible (for me) rate.  I'd never had any problems eating whatever I wanted and not gaining weight.  However, in two years I've gained approximately 20 pounds.  Not a good rate.  So now is the time to nip it in the bud before it continues and that is what I tell people--that if I don't watch myself now and find an exercise routine and eat better, I'll be well on my way to being overweight in a few years. 
Everyone at my job just thinks I am dedicated but then again I have a good 50 pounds to go yet. But considering I work in a call center having folks who are focusing on losing weight not just contributing to the lethargy of it all is helpful for the new folks coming into the center.

Although I haven't had anyone give me the talk I think my sister was getting irritated with the weekly announcements of weight coming off while she is still stuck at around 230 or more. I am trying to motivate her but man...now she even went so far as to switch her work schedule to evenings. Is wanting her to help me walk 5 dogs around the block so wrong??? Sure they drag you half the way but the other half you end up dragging them.  Plus its a great calorie burner! I need a dog walk...I mean boyfriend ^_~

Later!

i have a similar problem with my roommate but i think it's because i'm doing something about it and she's not. sometimes i think it's jealousy but, as you probably are, i've been working very hard to lose weight and feel better about myself so why should i have to feel bad everytime i bring something up concerning weight loss or counting calories? this is also the first time in my life that i've lost weight the right way and i decided to just stop talking about anything weight related with her. i think it is hard for people to be supportive when someone is actually doing really well and they're not!

good luck!
Ya! My husband was at first because I was finally so excited to eat right. I limited everything. I ate according to portion sizes; what I should have been doing all along! I bought a food scale too. I guess at first I was so excited to finally get healthy and lose weight I told everyone and they thought I may have been obsessed. Now they see healthy hair and skin and a slender me. I still have a lot to go but I have my whole life to do it! Good luck. If you know you are doing a good job, don't let anyone steal your joy!
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Glad to see I am not the only one experiencing this, thanks for the encouragement. I do feel really good about my weight loss & I do agree that it can be hard for people to listen to calorie counting, excercising & weight loss, especially if they are not at that point in their lives. 

I do not talk about weight loss to anyone, except those closest to me & I guess I can see why my brother "thinks" I am obsessed.  I don't know about anyone else, but I literally have to psych myself out to keep motivated.  I keep a little goal sheet & look at it everyday - in hopes that it will remind me about the bigger picture of why I am doing this.

Yes, calorie-counting, weight loss, & excercise are constantly on my mind - but these are also the things that  are keeping me on track at the moment.  I explained to my brother that the reason I talk about them so much is because this new life style is now a major part of my life - something I hope never goes away. :)

That is too cool for school. I have a spreadsheet that I use in addition to calorie count so I feel ya on the goal sheet. At the bottom of my spread sheet I have a lil note that says, "Please have lost 67 pounds by the end of the year". Welp already met that goal...although I am currently stuck at it...I can't wait to see more come off and see how I look then. Never stop no matter what anyone says.

Later!
Yeah, I've completely experienced the bit where, if you don't have a reason to be trying to lose weight, you must be obsessed.

I actually heard, "I understood when you were trying to lose weight for your wedding, but why are you doing it now?"

People who have no interest in their health reject the idea of paying attention to it.  It's a problem of our culture.
I think it's funny when people think you are obessed with staying healthy, but if you ask me, if I ever get unobessed with doing what I am suppose to and eating right, then I'll probably start gaining all my weight back.  I am doing it healthy and slowly and that is really all that matters to me.  I am glad I have the tools to make it seem like I'm "obessed".  I guess I am if I think about.  Its always on my mind but it keeps me focused and now I think about everything that I put in my mouth.  I don't think I would mind if someone called me obessed because I am, but for GOOD REASONS!

Good Luck to you!
We HAVE to be obsessed.

It is not natural for us to eat healthy in this environment, so to do so, we must be obsessed.

What I mean by natural is this: our bodies are dictated by survival mechanisms to seek out that which can offer us the highest amount of calories in the smallest amount of food; our bodies WANT to store extra food because our bodies don't know that food is always available.

There isn't something wrong with us for gaining weight. Any natural human being would under the current circumstances; I think I read that something like 80% of immigrants gain up to 10lbs in their first 5 years in the United States. It's natural.

So we HAVE to be obsessed to make up for it. We have to 'outsmart' nature to be thin, basically.
Eh, they just get their panties all in an uproar because it's not "normal" and "usual circumstance" for people to CARE or PAY ATTENTION to their weight and health -- so when you start doing it people think you're "obsessed." Well, I'M REALLY obsessed but I don't care -- I have to be or I'll balloon right up. NOBODY EVER gets on MY case -- of course, my whole family is into health and fitness -- though my parents' diet could DEFINITELY use some fine tuning -- they exercise though. All this is normal for us. I did, however, have an acquaintance tell me I was "anal" about exercise. Oh well, I could care less. I'm living my life and getting done what I have to get done -- it's not causing me any problems. I'm NOWHERE NEAR anorexic. And diet and exercise is good for MY body AND my mind.

Plus, people are afraid of what they don't understand -- don't forget that!
Heh.

I got the same treatment from people around me. I have not stopped being obsessed, I just stopped talking about it.

I'm eating lots of oatmeal, fruits and vegetables, cooking healthy foods and eating according to the suggested serving sizes. I fill up with salads and peeled mini carrots for snacks. I'm steadily losing weight and plan on eating this way forever.

This is the first time in my life that I have felt like I am in control of my body and my eating! To be able to change something, I must be able to track it. So, I have a spreadsheet I use to track daily calories, weight and an estimate of body fat percentage.

My graphs are all going in the right direction. The "normal" people who talked to me are all eating about 3000+ calories a day (as far as I can estimate) and slowly gaining weight. I think I like being obsessed better than the alternative.

---Kayvan
Wow, its like my life all spelt out, in varying degrees.
My bestie sat down with me and said people were talking about me becoming obessed with food. She's banned me from talking about food to her.
My boyfriend MAKES me eat meat - he's sacred too. People have talked to him about me 'not eating' depite me eating 3 meals a day and two snacks.
I've had a few people say their worried I don't eat anough. Its so annoying cos the truth is they eat too much.

I just can't talk about food with people. Its making me anti-social. I cant eat many meals with people cos they pick on me for chosing salads over cheesy pasta.
oh my GOD Kayvan, WHY didn't I meet you before I got engaged??? You're HOT!

I mean, even with your spock gear on...I have to admit, the Trekkie thing's a turn off, but I'll take it! You more than make up for it!
Ooooh shakti that's hilarious!  I read your post and had to look up.  Kayvan looks kind of like my dad did when he was younger.
I get the same thing from a few guys in my troop, and my mother when I go visit home lol.

However usually you have to look at the source, they guys in my troop who give me the gears about it are the guys who are just passing the minimum physical standards.  I find the best way to deal with it is to just give it right back to them and say something juvenile like, well your girlfriend likes it, basically telling them to shut up in a round about way and usually they do.
wait, how is the trekkie thing a turnoff?  and that's hardly Spock gear- in Spock's day red shirts = expendable! 

Which leads me to wonder- was there some kind of redshirt revolution between the original Trek and TNG where suddenly they all became Command Branch?
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