I want to lose weight so....

1. I feel comfortable in a bathing suit again.

not that I ever was super ecstatic about the dreaded bikini, but now I'm too embarrassed to even look in the mirror at myself in one. I'd like to loose some tummy so i feel at least comfortable again.

2. I gain some self confidence back.

ok, superficial, I know. but I've never had great self confidence to begin with, so the weight gain hasn't helped. I'm taking other steps too, but I'd like to look in the mirror every once in a while and think "man, you're pretty"

how bout you all?? why do you wanna lose weight??

I want to lose weight so that I feel comfortable naked.

Respect:people stop looking at me like a loser or less than human and start treating me with respect Toughness: I'm tired of being a wimp and allways turning the other cheek. When someone pisses me off I want to be strong enough where I know I can kick his ass and stop being scared what if he has friends,what if he knows karate,what if I win but he ambusheses me later.well pain on the body fades but the scars in my mind will never go away Health:I want to be able climb a fence or tree or play b ball with friends and not suck at it. Life; I allways put off my life I allways said I'll do that when I'm skinny or tommorow well if I keep doing that I'm going to run out of tommorows. But I feel if I live my life like this it's going to suck anyway Selfasteem:I want to like what I see in the mirror and not be disappointed when I wake up Insanity:I was teased so much I had a mental breakdown after middle school I get so emotional at times I feel like bashing my head in a wall. But I haven't done that since I was 13 and I have OCD( obsessive compulsive disorder) that gets worse at stressed times Happiness:I wanna be happy with myself and enjoy life I don't ever remeber being happy my sister said that even when I was little skinner she hasn't seen me happy and she's right Girls: I want a girlfriend I only kissed a girl once 2 years ago. I was skinner then and I just met her it was new years eve.but I bin Hurt so many times before its like girls just come up to me to say that I'm fat and I'll never have a girl like them.some times in groups sometimes they pretended to like me. One particular girl stood out like that. last week I decided to forget my past not just that I decided to forgive everyone who Hurt me but I decided to remember what happend so I make sure it never happens again.i forgive all those kids and my dad. But recently my dad went crazy and now I remeber why I hate him it's hard to forget your past when it's still in your present