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expanding on my last post ~ I need help. confused if I have an waiting disorder or not.

I get called fat and so many other things that has made me very depressed. Also, very self conscious. I can't stand looking at myself in the mirror and I have Bren loosing weight quite fast. Like 5 pounds in 2 days. I see myself as 160-200 pounds. I'm 140 now but loosing weight very fast. I am addicted to working out all day even if I black out. And I only allow myself to have 200 calories per day and if I go over I make myself throw up and if I do eat I make myself throw up anyways. Or I will decrease the amount of calories I have in a day for the next week. I am really confused and don't know what to do. Any suggestions?

hey:)

you really need to get help, because at 140 pounds, you are not fat, you are normal for your age. Be brave and go talk to your parents, friends, or an adult you trust about this, because they will help you get better and feel better about yourself. There's no sense in wasting your youth on this, especially because you may have some severe health issues because of this later on. The sooner you get help, the sooner you'll feel better.

Good luck!

I'm just afraid. And like I'm scared. I'm forcing myself not to eat because I had 240 calories yesterday instead of 200 and I was making myself throw up. I really never feel hungry anymore and don't like eating. I'm always cold and shaky and I am really addicted to working out for like 4 hours straight even if I black out or get hurt. I usually throw up every morning anyways because I am nervous to go to school. I'm scared. Like it's so hard to make myself eat because I feel disgusting when I do eat, so I throw it up or the next day I reduce my calorie intake. And I'm decreasing the amount each week. Idk.

if you reached for help here, it means that you are aware that you have a problem, which is the first step towards recovery. Just ask for hep in real life too: i'm sure that you have loving friends and family which will be there for you.

By what you said, i can see that you realize that you are not happy right now-then why keep doing what you are doing? You are a growing teenager, you need more calories to live. Start increasing your calorie intake by at least 100 calories everyday, starting today, and you will feel better. Don't let this disease take over your life, because it is the disease that makes you so scared and depressed.

 

I can't have anything today cuz I had 240 instead of 200 calories.

well, that is exactly the point! how do you expect to get better if you don't do anything to help yourself? I don't want to sound harsh, but no one can do anything for you. If you want to get better, if you want to help yourself, than you will start eating more. Just have a snack, something you have fancied for a long time. And work out less-take a nap, do something you enjoy instead. Don't let calories and food guide your life

there is a website called somethingfishy.org which has a ton of resources for those with or think they have an eating disorder.  You have an eating disorder. 

You may not understand how much damage you are doing to your growing body.  This thread describes the consequences of an ED -- from the perspective of someone WITH an ED.  And unfortunately, this thread shows how lethal an ED can be

This is what is going to happen to you The Body Neglected

After your bones deteriorate and your reproductive organs become so atrophied they don't work, your other organs, including your brain will be permanently damaged. You will end up as a stunted adult with brittle bones and infertility.  But that's not the worst.

According to this medical authority NEDIC 

"The death rate for eating disorders is high: it ranges between 18% (in 20-year studies) and 20% (in 30-year follow-up studies). In fact, the annual death rate associated with anorexia is more than 12 times higher than the annual death rate due to all other causes combined for females between 15 and 24 years old." Cavanaugh, Carolyn. What we know about eating disorders: facts and statistics. In Lemberg, Raymond and Cohn, Leigh (Eds) (1999). Eating Disorders: A reference sourcebook. Oryx Press. Phoenix, AZ.

It goes on to say " The death rate associated with anorexia nervosa alone is more than 12 times higher than the overall death rate among young women in the general population."
Sullivan PF. Mortality in anorexia nervosa. American Journal of Psychiatry, 1995; 152(7): 1073-4.

These are recognized medical sources.  I suggest you take them seriously and seek help for your problem.

this is what happens when you stave:

Adequate nutrition has two components, necessary nutrients and energy in the form of calories. It is possible to ingest enough energy without a well-balanced selection of individual nutrients and produce diseases that are noticeably different from those resulting from an overall insufficiency of nutrients and energy. Although all foods are a source of energy for the human body, it is possible to consume a seemingly adequate amount of food without getting the required minimum of energy (calories).

Since the body will combat malnutrition by breaking down its own fat and eventually its own tissue, a whole host of symptoms can appear. The body's structure, as well as its functions, are affected. Starved adults may lose as much as 50% of their normal body weight. Characteristic symptoms of starvation include:

• shrinkage of such vital organs as the heart, lungs, ovaries, or testes, and gradual loss of their functions
• chronic diarrhea
• anemia
• reduction in muscle mass and consequent weakness
• lowered body temperature combined with extreme sensitivity to cold
• decreased ability to digest food because of lack of digestive acid production
• irritability and difficulty with mental concentration
• immune deficiency
• swelling from fluid under the skin
• decreased sex drive