why do i freak out about numbers??

so usually when i first started college this year i was maintaining perfectly around 115lbs. it was normal. then i continued my workout regimen, but due to time i was only eating about 1500 calories, which is sooooo NOT my maintenance. the past couple weeks i've been more like 113lbs, so why when im back up to 115 lbs this morning do i freak out!! WHO CARES!!! its 2 lbs!!! i've calmed myself down, but im still having the issue of getting enough calories in, because i'm positive i did not gain two pounds. I ate really late last nite cause by the time i came home from work i had only had 900 calories and it was 9pm so i stuffed to about 2200, so its just undigested food. i workout about 60 -75 mins a cardio a day, plus weights 3 times a week, i have a job where i stand and i walk on campus quite a bit during the day. im really afraid still to eat my maintenance calories and i have a hard time getting it in.

any suggestions?? im worried that with the 1600 calories im gonna gain again. and im really happy with 115lbs.

Good that you calmed yourself down.  I think you're doing remarkably well.  You are AWARE of your eating which sometimes people tend to forget about and end up gaining 40 or so pounds before they even realize it, then wonder "what happened".  I think that just being aware of your situation is half your battle.  Good job! 

Haha you remind me of me.

But for 1: you said your maintenance was 115

For 2: you were at 113

So what's wrong with the original 115? And why are you trying so hard to figure out the number on the scale?

It's only been THIS week that I've been caring a little less. I took measurements this morning and THEN weighed in. Because obviously if my numbers aren't off, it's just water retention, un-digested food, etc. And I wasn't "bad" yesterday, so apparently it's not me. We can't make that number a constant pound. 16 ozs of fluid and there is a pound.

Relax and find yourself a "range" number. Mines 120-125. I was at 124 this morning. Does it bug me? Little bit :) But I'm working on it too.

I am with you there.  My goal is 128 but had been hitting more like 126.  So when I initially really got to 128 again, I kind of freaked.  But then I gave myself a good shake and said #1: 128 is your goal so stop freaking out that you are actually that.  And then #2: decided that the range thing was the most important thing anyway, so anything between 125-129 is just fine.  It helped, so try thinking of it that way!  Good luck!!

thanks guys!!!

i did do a good job!! so far i haven't restricted today. i worked out and ate as normally would and i did catch myself and calm down. another step forward in the right direction!! thank you!