Frustration in clothing - no consistency in Plus Sizes.

So my size has changed drastically. Some clothes I used to wear now literally fall off and I'm fitting into clothes I haven't worn for many moons. I needed a nice pair of black pants or a black skirt to get me through this transition and still look presentable for job interviews (and on the job I just know I'll get this week, Xenu willing).

So I went shopping at Burlington Coat Factory. They have a reasonably well stocked Plus Size department, and they're cheap. I got the only jeans that actually had a shape and looked cute on me at my heaviest there. I found quite a few 3Xes that came through in a time of desperation there, too.

Snce I have a closet of every size from 14 on up to size 24, there are still a few golden oldies that I can pull out from time to time while I'm changing size like this. But it's not that extensive, and most of it is very worn and/or outdated - hence the need for a couple of transition pieces. I did, however, have a pair of Size 2X sweatpants/yoga pants that I never DID get to wear because I bought them without trying them on first and they were too small when I first purchased them and never got around to taking them back. Now they fit like a dream... all loose and cuddly and not a bit of cling... so I was very excited about going to shop for my little black skirt or black pants.

Bastids! The Size 2X pants I was interested in fit me like a stuffed sausage. The Size 3X skirt I bought (same line of clothing) skims my figure a little tighter than I'd like around the tummy and butt/hips, but not obscenely so (like the pants did), and a longish jacket (I have plenty) will cover the situation. And holding it up, it should last me a good long while through the transition. Won't look shlumpy when I'm a good deal smaller. It's fine.

But it makes me CRAZY. There is no consistency at all in Plus Size clothes. It's like manufacturers just say "Hey, this is a fat girl size. Throw a number on it, it doesn't matter which one." Bastids robbed me of my euphoria over being smaller.

Bad news...  There's no consistency in any size clothing.  I've got everything from a 2 to a 6.  It's really annoying and makes shopping difficult.

I know... And it doesn't only make shopping more difficult... It's making us feel like our efforts are worthless !

Agreed--it's not just plus size clothing. It's WOMEN'S clothing, period! The number is COMPLETELY arbitrary. Bah!

Since you are in transition from sizes to size, week by week, go to a 2nd hand store.  They always have dressing rooms.  Don't spend the money on new clothes if you don't have to right now on stuff that won't fit next week.  I refuse to buy new until I'm where I want to be in size. 

You and everyone else should be grateful that different labels clothing fits differently-otherwise Im sure some people would be destined to never have anything fit them correctly.

Youre not upset about the clothing-youre upset about your own weight. If you were a size/weight  that you were truly happy and healthy at, then when you went shopping you wouldnt be upset by having to go up to the next size in this, or be overly estatic about going down a size in that. You could be confident and just accept that clothes are made differently by every brand and label.

If you are just losing weight to be a certain clothing size-then thats your choice. But you are never going to be 100% happy because EVERY brand is different. And rather than feeling sorry for yourself because of it, you should channel that into motivation to hit the gym.

Original Post by wholegraingoddess:

You and everyone else should be grateful that different labels clothing fits differently-otherwise Im sure some people would be destined to never have anything fit them correctly.

Youre not upset about the clothing-youre upset about your own weight. If you were a size/weight  that you were truly happy and healthy at, then when you went shopping you wouldnt be upset by having to go up to the next size in this, or be overly estatic about going down a size in that. You could be confident and just accept that clothes are made differently by every brand and label.

If you are just losing weight to be a certain clothing size-then thats your choice. But you are never going to be 100% happy because EVERY brand is different. And rather than feeling sorry for yourself because of it, you should channel that into motivation to hit the gym.

 That's a nice lecture, but I think the OP *is* doing something about it since she said she's in transition and has already gone from a size 24 to a size 14. And speaking as someone who *is* generally happy with their size, I *still* find it a pain that numbers are completely arbitrary. There's so many clothes I'd love to just order online, for example, but often have no idea what size to get! I don't feel bad when I have to get a size 5 rather than a size 3. But it's annoying when I get three pairs of pants for Christmas that are all the same size and one pair is too big, one pair is too small, and one pair is tight at the hips but gaps at the waist.

I completely agree with the online ordering thing. I have wanted to order stuff in the past, but in the end changed my mind because I didn't want to have to deal with having to return it through the mail. Way too much trouble. I mean, from Old Navy for example. I own two zippie sweaters. One is XL, and one is XXL. They are the exact same measurments and everything, so I don't get the difference. Obviously, if I would have bought them online, one would have been too big at XXL, and the other one would have been too small at XL. That makes no sense. And right now I am wearing a zippie hoodie from roots (same measurements as the two old navy ones). It is a man's SMALL. So old navy women XXL equals roots men small ???

Original Post by wholegraingoddess:

You and everyone else should be grateful that different labels clothing fits differently-otherwise Im sure some people would be destined to never have anything fit them correctly.

Youre not upset about the clothing-youre upset about your own weight. If you were a size/weight that you were truly happy and healthy at, then when you went shopping you wouldnt be upset by having to go up to the next size in this, or be overly estatic about going down a size in that. You could be confident and just accept that clothes are made differently by every brand and label.

If you are just losing weight to be a certain clothing size-then thats your choice. But you are never going to be 100% happy because EVERY brand is different. And rather than feeling sorry for yourself because of it, you should channel that into motivation to hit the gym.

Well, now, THERE's a whole lot of inaccurate assumptions in one post that even completely ignore everything that's been said in the post.  I've been changing sizes DRASTICALLY.  Losing weight, not gaining.  I'm not as far down as a 14 - but my closet is filled with clothing from the last 20 years that range from a size 14 on up to size 24 as I gained weight because, yes, I was unhappy.

I'm THRILLED to have dropped six sizes, and the reason I joined CalorieCounters is to provide me with continued ideas and support to keep losing.

You know what?  I would be 100% happy if there were even the remotest similarity in clothing, but so many clothing manufacturers just say "screw it" when it comes to Plus Sizes.  Yes, all clothing manufacturers vary a bit from size to size, but Plus Sizes gets extra special treatment.  Armholes that are HUGE, while allowing no room for a butt and waist at all in some lines.  Or, as Maryfway pointed out, XXLs that are the equivalent of a men's small.

Sorry, I won't *hit the gym.*  What I will do instead is keep my calorie count to 1200; make sure those 1200 calories are all healthful and filled with protein, vitamins, etc.; keep walking at a brisk pace for five miles and up a day; use the Gazelle and mini-trampoline in my bedroom, stretch and do weight resistance training in my home.  No stairs to nowhere for me - I'm going to keep using my actual stairs.  Good for you if that works for you, but the thread was actually about the inconsistency of Plus Size clothing.

Sorry, but I am not "grateful" for simply being able to hunt for hours to find one or two items of clothing that fit, and have there be six sizes and more in variation.  Do you work for a clothing manufacturer?  You think just like the ones I'm ranting about.

I think they do it just to keep you in the store and make you try on a gillion things. I'll go from a medium to an extra large because of my boobs alone. =(

Original Post by wholegraingoddess:

You and everyone else should be grateful that different labels clothing fits differently-otherwise Im sure some people would be destined to never have anything fit them correctly.

Youre not upset about the clothing-youre upset about your own weight. If you were a size/weight  that you were truly happy and healthy at, then when you went shopping you wouldnt be upset by having to go up to the next size in this, or be overly estatic about going down a size in that. You could be confident and just accept that clothes are made differently by every brand and label.

If you are just losing weight to be a certain clothing size-then thats your choice. But you are never going to be 100% happy because EVERY brand is different. And rather than feeling sorry for yourself because of it, you should channel that into motivation to hit the gym.

I don't care what the number is -- it means NOTHING. I wish at least that it meant something consistantly so I didn't have to waste so much damn time trying a million things on in a million sizes.

You all seem to be really unhappy about shopping...and about my former post.

No I dont work for a clothing manufacturer. I did work retail in highschool though?  All I am saying is that different brands and stores' merchandise is ALWAYS going to fit differently. Part of that is because different clothing stores are going to be geared toward different demographics, and partly just because they choose only carry up to certain sizes, and part of it is because of the types of styles they produce.... The Gap? Womens clothing. There I am always the smallest size that they carry, and then I find that only are rare occasions, do the items fit me *perfectly*. Another contributing factor: how you like your clothes to fit you also. Sure if I were to go to an Abercrombie, I could get the extra small, it fits. But I like a little room in my clothes. Point is that my personal feeling about how clothing should fit me affects the size I buy, and Im sure you are the same.

All I was trying to get across to you is this: If you are 100% happy with your body and are confident about it, then whatever size have to wear-whether for you that would be a 2 or a 6 or a 10 or a 16-wont not make you feel upset or defeated. 

Also, I didnt realize you were unhappy about the sizes you had to buy in your first post, I guess I focused more on the amount of Xs you were saying you had to wear and I thought that was the cause of your frustration. But isnt a 2x just one size lower than a 3x? Im used to picking up 2 different sizes and taking both into the fitting room with me if Im not confident in which would fit me best just my looking at it...Shopping can be hard work sometimes, but its fun work at the same time when you find things you really love! :)

And secondly, I dont care what your specific work out is- whether its at a gym or not, my point in saying hit the gym was that you should use it at motivation to take some sort of action or effort to get to be the size that you want...but if youre not actually upset about your size then good for you, and disregard that comment. Didnt mean to ruffle so many feathers ha.

Wholegraingoddess - My only point was, I hate shopping. I wish they used measurements instead of "numbers" because it would be quicker for me. I would know trying something on that it would fit, instead of struggling through every different store's number system.

I worked retail in highschool too and I know it's going to fit differently. That irritates me. Why can't we be like dude's and have our pants be measured in numbers? That's what I want to know. =/

And I think that was the OP's point, not that she was unhappy about being a 3X.

Ooh, another fun one that I recently learned about was vanity sizing. They do it in a lot of the mall shops like Express. That's where they make the women's clothing a bit too big. Like they'll make a size 6, but put size 4 on the tag. That one confused me for a bit.

Then I wanted to do something different, so I hit Ambercrombie. I was with my bud and we were checking out some shirts. I thought they looked unusually small. He found his size and put it on. He could hardly move. I'm guessing that they make men's clothes smaller and women's clothes bigger??

Original Post by wholegraingoddess:

You all seem to be really unhappy about shopping...and about my former post.

No I dont work for a clothing manufacturer. I did work retail in highschool though? All I am saying is that different brands and stores' merchandise is ALWAYS going to fit differently. Part of that is because different clothing stores are going to be geared toward different demographics, and partly just because they choose only carry up to certain sizes, and part of it is because of the types of styles they produce.... The Gap? Womens clothing. There I am always the smallest size that they carry, and then I find that only are rare occasions, do the items fit me *perfectly*. Another contributing factor: how you like your clothes to fit you also. Sure if I were to go to an Abercrombie, I could get the extra small, it fits. But I like a little room in my clothes. Point is that my personal feeling about how clothing should fit me affects the size I buy, and Im sure you are the same.

All I was trying to get across to you is this: If you are 100% happy with your body and are confident about it, then whatever size have to wear-whether for you that would be a 2 or a 6 or a 10 or a 16-wont not make you feel upset or defeated.

Also, I didnt realize you were unhappy about the sizes you had to buy in your first post, I guess I focused more on the amount of Xs you were saying you had to wear and I thought that was the cause of your frustration. But isnt a 2x just one size lower than a 3x? Im used to picking up 2 different sizes and taking both into the fitting room with me if Im not confident in which would fit me best just my looking at it...Shopping can be hard work sometimes, but its fun work at the same time when you find things you really love! :)

And secondly, I dont care what your specific work out is- whether its at a gym or not, my point in saying hit the gym was that you should use it at motivation to take some sort of action or effort to get to be the size that you want...but if youre not actually upset about your size then good for you, and disregard that comment. Didnt mean to ruffle so many feathers ha.

Oh, not so much unhappy as annoyed. You're responding, once again, without reading the content of the post. While I understand that working as a shop girl in high school makes you a supreme expert on regular women's sizes beyond anyone who's been wearing clothes for over 40 years, your eyes seem to glaze over once X's come into play. And that's the problem.

Yes, 2X is smaller than a 3X! 3X is the size I used to wear regularly! I had 2Xs in my closet that I never used to fit into and now they do! Now I went to this retailer, and the 2Xs were fitting like a stuffed sausage! Follow me so far? Ok! So I tried on a 3X and it just barely fit! And that was my annoyance! Follow me? I'm significantly smaller than I was when 3Xs fit regularly. There's not even the remotest consistency in sizes. Now, once you get into the X sizes, unlike 6s and 4s, they cover up to 4 sizes. In other words, 18-20, 22-24, and so on and so on. That's how it works, IF the manufacturer gives a good god darn about what size the woman actually is instead of just "Oh, she's fat. Throw a number on it." Ok, now here's another point made in another post you seem to have passed over. At SOME stores, the women's XXL is equivalent to men's size small! Follow?

Ok! Now we'll take it a step further. You're telling me to "hit the gym" or "follow some kind of workout" as though I am not doing this. Ok. Now think. How does one begin to fit into clothing one hasn't worn in years because they were too small? That's right! They work out! haha! And they exercise! And they work very, very hard! And sometimes they make posts about clothing sizes that have nothing to do with needing to work out to fit into a specific size, but are instead about the fact that if you think REGULAR sizes are bad, you should, just for poops and giggles, sometime check out the inconsistency in Plus Sizes! That have armholes big enough to fit a team of horses through and yet seem to think women this size have no shape elsewhere!

Perhaps YOU require sleeve sizes larger than your butt, but most women don't. The shapeless nature of women's Plus Size clothing is another point of contention. As well as the alarming lack of selection. ALARMING. But the attitude of "Hey, you don't like it.... hit the gym" is certainly not exclusive to you. It's just a less than charming approach to a consumer market.

Hope that didn't ruffle your feathers! Haha! hoho! heehee!

Chuckle at me all you want.

Youre the one wearing 3x pants.

Lol this is making me glad im a guy... *go to a store find my waist size on the shorts or pants boom the pretty much fit.. and if they dont its fixable with a belt if its to big...

 * that applies only if your not an "emo" guy who wears girls pants >.<... i still dont see why they wanna cramp theyre "junk" into those pants.. but thats another topic

Original Post by systemdrop:

Lol this is making me glad im a guy... *go to a store find my waist size on the shorts or pants boom the pretty much fit.. and if they dont its fixable with a belt if its to big...

 * that applies only if your not an "emo" guy who wears girls pants >.<... i still dont see why they wanna cramp theyre "junk" into those pants.. but thats another topic

I actually was in a convo with an emo guy. He said he wore size 11 or something and I said: "oh, wow, we wear the same size!!" Do you know what his response was? "Levi's run small." OMG! I was so offended!!!

That's okay. He can't reproduce. Lol.

Really thats what this has come to? Yeah youre right, Im so miserable being me. I dread knowing that I have to be me my whole life. I am so awful and so much less intelligent than you. I am lacking so much thought.  Way to go. You figured it out.

You win now I suppose.

Y'know, I was thinking about some of the things wholegraingoddess said--before she got way out of line, in my humble opinion, with the judgemental remarks--and how wrong the assertion of 'if you're 100% happy with your body, the number won't matter' is.

First of all, I refuse to believe that anyone is 100% happy with their body, 100% of the time. We all suffer from times of doubt, from things we don't like or want to change. And in the society we live in, we all suffer from 'fat phobia'.

And when we lose weight, we feel better, but I know for me, if a size of jeans runs really small and I need, for example, a size 9, it's like stepping into those old 'fat feelings', stepping into that old size. I was never very overweight--about 15 pounds overweight and I carried it pretty well--but a size 11 for a girl at 5'2 made me all kinds of self-conscious. And yes, I'm pretty happy with my body now, but even annoyance aside, putting on a size that fit so many pounds ago is like putting back on those POUNDS, for a few minutes. We can rationalize it all we want that it's 'just a number', but in the end...it's not. And I totally understand not only modifiedme's annoyance that sizes vary so much, but (I might be making an assumption here, but it seems on par with what you've said so far...please correct me if this isn't the case!) the annoyance of feeling, even for that moment, that she's back at the beginning, because here she is, at the size she started at. And she's not the WEIGHT or the INCHES that she started at...but the pant number can play tricks on you sometimes.

And on a lighter note, lame boy emo-pants are lame!

You're so right on all counts.  And also just frustrated with having to waste so much TIME trying to find clothing at all.  I'm wayyyy bigger than I should be, obviously (and working on it).  But I'm hardly alone.  There's a huge (pun intended) market share being treated like we just don't count.

Thanks for your post.  I needed that right now.