gaining on 2000 rather than 3500?

hi everyone

ive been recovering from anorexia and eating on ave btwn 1950-2250 for about the past 2 months.  at first i did gain but in the past 3 weeks ive gone from 93.5 to 95, to 96.5.  now dont get me wrong, im very happy to finally be recovering and gaining and getting back to life, i just dont understand why some ppl are told or need to consume much more in order to gain than what i seem to need?  i almost feel jipped in not being able to eat as much altho i dont even know that i necessaraly would(slight Ed thoughts).

also, id like to eventually be able to maintain on a nice amount of food, 2000ish id think, and since im eating that now and gaining, im a bit scared?  maybe once i weigh more ill need more to maintain my weight and then what i need now to gain, ~2000, will be my maintenenance?

any insight would really be appreciated!

thank you!

hi GIBBIT-im not sure, i mean i was not the girl that could eat whatever and not gain bc i was always on the ehavy side.  also, if the body knows it getting more, then why are there over weight ppl to begin with? 

i wish i didnt constantly count and no matter how many times ppl say, eat more nuts and avocado to increase in a healthy way, i still just choose bread+pb.  i go blank on ways to increase in a better way then just dont.

i need to get over 2000 since id hopefully like to maintain on something like that in the future, not gain!  i just wish the Nut told me what to eat but im just bad at picking foods and planning.

agruskin: I think you deserve more credit than you are giving yourself when it comes to picking foods. In my opinion, your food is pretty balanced. You eat breads, dairy foods, veggies, fruit, and fats (PB, trail mix, avocado.) What would be so bad with just increasing the amount of the things you like? Like I have said before, reading other peoples' posts here gives you a somewhat skewed version of what people eat. Most people don't cook things such as quinoa or barley on a regular basis. You did add meat yesterday, which is good. Maybe continue adding a bit more protein from meat, fish, or beans. Try pesto on your cheese sandwich or with veggies. Put the trail mix or nuts in your yogurt? I know it is hard to just "eat what you like" when you aren't sure any more what you do like but you are experimenting and discovering what you like. Yesterday, you realized you like pastrami. Maybe have a mini goal of  trying a new food or something you ate in the past once a day or week.

ha, so this is corny but-

I HATE THE ED! I HATE THINKING OF FOOD!  I NEED A JOB AND THINK MAYBE IM NOT GETTING HIRED BC IM 5'4 AND 96LBS!?

I WILL BE HEATLTHY ASAP!

so you HAVE to be sedentary to get a hypermetabolism people mention and talk about? that doesnt make sense, whouldnt your system be moving sluggishly toi say the least sedentary?

wooooooooooo-eating more, whether its 2000, or 2200, makes you live life!  i love not thinking about food and just living!!!!!! yea!

thanks TUFFSTUFF AND everyone and anyone else -youre all great and keep fighting!

you know what it really boils down too is what YOUR okay with. how much food can you take in so your being well nourished enough to keep on living, but a good enough quantity to not scare you and cause a relapse. i personally began eating a pretty big calorie quantity because i felt like i had nothing to lose in my life. i just wanted to be healthy and my hair stop falling out. i was also not that underweight to begin with. i started at 102 lbs. and now im nestling between 107-108. but to me i just didnt care how much i gained or not i just didnt want to feel like i couldnt get out of bed anymore. even though i was 102 i guess i just wasnt "healthy" enough my diet of only toast,vegan ham and iceberg lettuce i guess wasnt providing enough nutrients =]lol so i began eating. and now i maintain somewhere eating 2600-2800, i try to vary my options as much as i can. but thats where i get stuck sometimes. i just need variation.

my brother on the other hand who recovered from anorexia (both of my brothers were diagnosed anorexics) doesnt eat much. but he's at  healthy weight. he doesnt have a problem with variety. actually yeah, he doesnt really eat carbs. but when he wants to he eats them. he doesnt cry over meals anymore. but he eat so little in my opinion. when we stay at home and help out the parents, he just waits and doesnt eat for hours and hours, probably half a day, then he will eat a meal. whatever he's in the mood for wether its chicken wings or a carrot. he gains weight really easily too. and he doesnt like to eat till 3-4 pm everyday. i guess in a few ways he still has disordered eating. but he isnt as bad as he was before(thank god). a few times a week he has these really big meals like an entire pizza or he'll drink straight half n half  cartons or he just eats ALOT and i mean ALOT for a day. and he feels sorta guilty but he doesnt let it bother him too much. afterwards he'll go for a run for a few hours or play guitar but i guess thats the life he feels okay with. he feels okay eating that much, anything different will make him relapse. he's okay with eating minimum. it keeps him sane i guess.

whatever works for you though. whatever your comfortable with and as long as you can stay sane and maintain a healthy body then go for it. i like food, always have liked food, im okay with eating good amounts. yeah, sometimes it gets to me, but i jump right back on track. it just depends on the person.

MEESH-hey!!!!

lol, so 1st, and this will sound ED and dumb, but can you post your foods again, i liked seeing ppl eat more how i think i eat, like at restaurants and treats and stuff, yet still healthy and all!

ok, so yes, i also love food, i used to be a bit ovwer weight and dont neccesaraly want to go back there, but i like food.  im eating ~2000 these days and have tons aof energy, jump out of bed, walk the dog, etc, but-im still at an unhealthy weight plus, most of my life i was btwn 130s-150ish so being slightly under 5'4 and ~96-97lbs, i know i need to still gain a lot, dont know exactly how much...?

rt now im not working and am not active, walk the dog, walk around the house, maybe some shopping, nothing really though.  i need to gain, i want to maintain on 2000ish in the future, not always gain on it.  im gaining ~1.5/wk the past 3 wks so the Nut. said to stay at that and that when you start to gain you need more to maintain, so i assume on the futire maybe ill need more to gain and will be able to maintain at 2000?

i know you believe in eating at lest 2500 to gain and recover the  metabloism, but for some freakin reason i think, well im gaining, why eat more, i mean sometimes ill eat ~2200, but thats the most. 

so thats my story.  im so happy ypure doing well!  and im so happy that youve helped me become a bit more healthy, food is great, life is great, and should not be ceneterd around food/excerciose!

take care!

Hey agruskin!

I know exactly what you mean about feeling "jipped" with the calories. That's actually a good thought to have in some ways though... it shows that your desire to eat (doesn't mean you're engaging in it!) is coming back! This is a really good sign of recovery, to want the food again.

I know that you've probably learned all about starvation mode and such. It does take a while to get out of. You have to have your body getting complete rest, that means leading a sedentary lifestyle for a bit of time, and getting more than adequate nutrients.

During recovery, you kind of have to put your life on hold. Don't worry about anything else except for regaining your health. If you don't stop now, then your behaviors will catch up with you later. My next advice is going to sound REALLY scary... but if you could tolerate the idea... then go for it!

So you have to gain now, right? It doesn't matter if you're gaining .2 ounces a day or 2 pounds a day, you still have alot of weight to gain back in order to become healthy again. So why not just go all out and eat more calories? I know that this is REALLY scary, but like Meesh said (I love her advice :)), you have nothing to lose!

Try maybe increasing your intake to 2500 for a few days, and see how that feels. If you feel like you could tolerate more, shoot for 3000. Your job right now is to get better, and food is medicine. It's not a bad thing at all, it's what's going to save your life.

Here's an example if you need any reassurance... I had severe Anorexia three years ago, I was 5'4" and 70 lbs., so naturally, my skeletal butt got thrown into a hospital. They put me on bedrest. The first few days in, I began a 1500 calorie diet. However, this was increased by 500 calories every two days, until I topped out at 4000!

I gained roughly 4 ounces a day at first on the 1500. Then, even on the 4000, there would be days when I would lose! You just really have to feed yourself alot so your body goes into overdrive. Eventually, my metabolism evened out as I approached a healthier weight.

Also, make sure you're NOT weighing yourself more than twice a week. Weight is inconsistant. I wish there was some exact science with it, but there itsn't. All toll, I had to gain 35 lbs. It took me approximatly 18 weeks to do so. It would have been great to gain an even 2 lbs. a week, but there were some weeks I'd lose, others maintain, and others... I'd shoot up 5+ lbs.!

Just eat right now though. Don't be afraid to eat a bit more. Those who succeed in life do so by going ABOVE AND BEYOND what they think they can do. This applies to recovery fully. The more "risks" you take, the less scary simple things will seem. So go for it, and keep working towards a better life! I wish you the best of luck, stay strong <33

JULZ-hi!  thanks for your awesome response.  so as i said ive been eating ~2000 the past couple months and as of late gaining ~1.5/wk the past 3 weeks.  i went to my 1st Nut appt this past wed and she said bc of my steady gain i should stay at this intake level, why would she say this if so many here disagree?  she is an ED specialist too.

im about 97lbs now and to make matters worse, i still live at home t 25, and my parsnts constantly send mixed messages regarding my gaining.  today for ex my dad asked like 10 tims to go to the gym w him then told me that after i need to stop gaining i cant eat how i do now, like ill only be able to 1//2 a sandwich etc which freaked me out bc a few days ago i saw my weight-~97 and low and i know i need to gain and am ok w it, but its liek, why did he say that stuff?

also, i eat the same foods over and over bc i like them and i dont like to cook.  do you think i sohuld go to 2500 despite waht the Nut said, that im gaining, my stats...?  you think eat 2500 a few days and then what? weigh expecting a gain bc of the increase in cals?  i only weigh 1/wk rt now.  would you have an ex if you do think i should go for the 2500? 

thanks so very much, im just feeling confused.  im pretty srue i still need to gain, i want to maintain on about this in the future, not always gain on it, just getting confused by the mixed messages.

thanks!!! take care and congrats on your recovery!

argu- just a thought, if youve only put on 1.5 lbs in the past 3 weeks eatting say 2000 a day... this means you body has only held onto 5200 cals in surplus... and that if the 1.5 IS real weight and not water. i think it would be worth your time to increase.

keep in mind im no expert and should take the advice i give as well... lemme know how youre doin!

MALIBU-its 1.5 per week, for the past 3 weeks, that ive gained.

just confused by all the mixed messages?

hey agru:

I know little to nothing about this whole shebang, except what I've experienced myself, so can only offer this.  I never restricted to less than 1000, but I exercised, burning off about 600 calories a day.  I was always pretty active beforehand - I'm a brown belt kickboxer, with all the training that comes with that - so I would guess I have an average metabolism.   This summer for a while, I played with the idea of recovery, increasing to about 1600.  I gained weight.  Boy did I gain weight, even more quickly than you are doing now.  Then, after about 5 weeks, I got bored.  I got bored, and I fainted in Waitrose.  So I increased my calories.  I lost on 2.500, and the I maintained on 3.000.  Make the jump, you might surprise yourself!

But bugger me, you're right, it isn't half confusing.  And when it's so confusing, it's EASY to give yourself excuses not to do it.  So So easy.  And we have good days, and we have days when we **** up.  And it makes a miserable situation even sodding worse.    And parents suck, my dad constantly complains about how unfit he is, talks about going to the gym when he KNOWS it kills me that I can't go....but you sound like you are hugely resourceful and strong, and I know you can do this.  You sound responsible, and a pretty all round fantastic person....have you got a second opinion you can ask of someone you trust?  

All the luck in the world, ok?

hi THEO-thanks for the encouragement.  the Nut i went to is supposedly an ED specialist w years of experience.  it was only my 1st appt w her and she basically said that since my gains have been consistant, not to make a change. 

at the height of my ED i was only eating veggies and fruit really and taking spin classes and other gym stuff like 4/wk.  before that i was never an athelete so i really dont know how my metabolism is, im sure ive screwed w it though. 

deff good+bad days.  during the week im ok bc i have structure w my food but wknds, when my paresnts are around, there are always unscheduled food surprises that throw me.  like, maybe were going out to eat, or not, what time, where? for some stupid reason all these things matter to me.

wed, only a few days ago, i was ~96-97lbs, i couldnt have jumped 10000lbs in that amount of days and whatever my father said to me for whatever reason about cutting down my food etc really threw me and dont know why he said it when till then i was feeling good about gaining, knowing it was right and that i still needed to being ~5'4.  just looking at the bmi chart i see im underweight and need to be ~120, at least, especailly since ive always been a bit overweight and i think my body would be mpre comfortable at a higher weight.  but why would the Nut say only 2000 when others eat more and when i want to be able to maintain at 2000, not gain on that and then need to reduce for maintenace?

thanks for everything and keep up the great work THEO!

Those of you that have responded and experienced hypermetabolism how much activity were you doing? Theo are you doing any exercise at all? I am afraid that perhaps I am keeping my metabolism stuck by continuing to exercise but I am, at the same time, scared s$%#less to stop. Please let me know your thoughts. I guess I justify exercising because, aside from planned exercise, I don't do anything. I mean I am not working so my lifestyle is pretty inactive except for errands and such. Thank you!

CHAKRLIE-i walk my dog, i try and walk as much as i can but i dont take gym calsses, not even yoga.  like 3/wk ill walk ~20 mins and i try to do weights 2/wk.  also not working so other than that i dont do a thing, the deff of sedentary. 

i dont know why everyone here says 2500, i know everyone here is great etc, but then the Nut, who has ED experience, says stay at 2000.  what the heck?

CHARLIE: I do a pretty hard yoga class five times a week, but I'm pretty active in my day to day life, I walk everywhere, I garden, I run errands, but at the same time if my parents are around I'm not allowed to do ANYTHING, so I would put myself in the light to moderate  activity levels. Having said that, it absolutely KILLS me not going to the gym, I mean sit on my hands, take the air out of my bicycle wheels, hide my trainers kills me!

Agru: I hear what you're saying, I guess I didn't have this because my doctor - who I love and if she told me jumping off a bridge would help I'd probably do it - told me to eat anywhere between 3.000 and 4.000 calories....the way I justified this to my ED was that I'd lost the weight before, I could do it again, and that helped quiet the voices for a while ( THOUGH I HAVE NO INTENTION OF DOING SO), and the way I justified this to myself was well, whenever in my life am I legitimately going to get the excuse to eat 3.000 calories a day?

Good luck!

Theo and Agru: Thanks for responding about the exercise question. I don't know if I am doing too much or not. I am definitely compulsive about the exercise but then I look at what others do and feel inactive in comparison. Please let me know what you guys think! Quick update on stats: about 5'2", weight, not sure, maybe high 60's? low 70's? I go for a walk, with intervals of running for about 45 minutes every morning before breakfast. Then another walk for 20 -30 minutes mid-morning (light walk). In the afternoon I either bike or use the elliptical for 25 -30 minutes or do another walk/run interval. I alternate between strength training days of abs, legs, arms, maybe 20 minutes each day on these? I take a light yoga class for an hour and a half once a week. I also park far when I shop or go to the library, etc. Walk while on talk on the phone, go around the block to get the mail, basically a whole bunch of crappy OCD rituals. Okay, I guess it is too much but I am at a loss as to how much to do. Please help!

CHARLIE-put bluntly, i dont think you should be doing any activity at all, what so ever.

i know that if you did not do anything it may cause you probs w eating enough, id have the same.  your weight is very very low at the moment and im pretty sure the activity is only causing more harm to your body.

i really really think you need, need to reduce this.  maybe just walk, in the AM and PM, w some weights 2/wk. 

think of your future, you arent helping yourself w this excercise and the agony of eating more is still not enough to nourish your body or gain any weight.

im sorry if this sounds mean and scarey but i think we all need wake up calls and i really hope this helps.