girls with ed's

when i check some girls profiles out here on c-c, i must admit, im apalled. why is it that some girls who are like 5'6-5'9 want to be 85 lbs? i just talked to a girl who wanted to weigh 90-100 lbs and i just dont get it. :S some other girl on here wants to weigh 85 although she knows she has an eating disorder and openly says it, but why isnt she doing anything about!??!?

i know its probably easier said than done, and i hope nobody feels im pointing fingers at them, but i just dont get it.

being curvacious is what seperates us from guys. if we all were stick figured we would look like boys.

to me paris hilton is not beautiful, beyonce is (although i must say shes gone skinny in recent months. i used to think nicole richie was beautiful before she turned into a skinny bag of bones. what most of these girls dont realize is, that "supermodels" are like super freaks, lol. they have really off proportions and weigh much less than what is natural for a woman, which is also why they introduced that minimum BMI thing in milan.

besides that, what most girls dont know is that pictures are overly retouched, so they seem perfect - but nobody's that perfect. why strive for something thats not possible?

anyway it was jus some frustration i needed to let out.. dont mind me :P im just shocked at how many girls use this website for the wrong thing

girls with e.d.s generally see themselves as much heavier than whats in the mirror.
also they have emotional issues that control thier food intake more than they actually do themselves.
i suggest to research and read instead of just blurting that kinda stuff out.

besides
not everyone wants to be shaped one way anyway or can be shaped one way.
some people want to sticks, some people want to be athletic,
some people want to just be a healthy weight.

its different for everyone.

to me, beyonce looked her best in dream girls.

supermodels have small frames that let them carry the lower wts.
i dont think thats a freak by any standard.

I second that. Many eating disorders are fuelled by distorted self image. I don't appear to see myself as other's do but that makes me eat more rather than less.

Saying that being that thin makes you look like a boy is just daft, some men have huge hips they don't look like women, some women have very straight figures and they still look like women.

Yes okay i agree i like women with curves BUT not everyone does, you've got to feel comfortable in your own skin. Yes, eating disorders are terrible things but you can't change a person by telling them they are a freak. A person can know they have an eating disorder but don't do anything about it because for them it's the only way they can see to change - yes it's not the healthy way but it'll only change when that person can.

We're all entitled to our opinions, but also we are entitled not to be made fun of and not to be mocked.

my eating disorder isn't because I want to look like Paris Hilton or Nicole Richie... It just developed after a lot of abuse and neglect, ect.. bad things in my childhood. I've ruined a lot of my life and missed out on a lot of the 'typical' teenage thing. I couldn't go to my prom because I felt so fat and was hysterically crying.

maybe you should talk to people and educate yourself about eating disorders before you go off on people with them. Would you go off about people with diabeties, about how their fat sacks of flesh who need to learn to control their insulin?

blurting what out? i said i was frustrated and that definately came across in my opinions. as far as i know,we are all allowed to say what we feel, just as u did.

im well aware that eating disorders start from a mental problem and then turn into a physical problem, as in yes it is a distortion of the real life image that victims of eating disorders see in the mirror.

and im defo not mocking anybody here. which is also what i wrote in nobody should feel that im pointing fingers at them so why dont u relax a little... and i think u misread my post cuz i didnt call girls with eds freaks. no way near that. i said that the ideals that they compare themselves too are very rare. as in not a lot of ppl are proportioned like a supermodel, nor are they super tall  or super slim. supermodels are NOT the representation of the average looking woman! (does that clarify? i take back using the word freak, if this makes the point come across better)

it just frustrates me what these girls are doing to themselves. i say hey whatever if u want to be thin thas cool. i myself want to be slim, but directly skinny with bones showing is just too much. some girls strive for the boney look. whats so healthy about that?

i in no way stated that people should be a certain way, although i think curves are beautiful. i think the athletic look with a defined waist and buff arms can actually look beautiful.

i wasnt trying to preach or anything. it was just my thoughts. youre welcome to read em and youre welcome not to.

hmm this post has seemed to have taken a negative turn. i defo wasnt trying to bash anybody. sorry you guys. i know ppl with eating disorders and have read up plenty about it.

my point was that something is wrong in this world when gals want to weigh under 100 lbs. not that something is wrong with the gals.

well im sure it bothers them too and like it or not you opinion is not informed of what e.d.s really are. so you blurted out words without thinking of what they mean to the people you are talking about.


you wouldnt rag on a lung cancer patient for all thier years of smoking while they were dying.

those girls are dying


its not something to ponder out loud without concern while peppering it with judgement just because you dont understand them.

and you still havent done any reading.
e.d.s are not about health and happiness.
and you cant just snap out of it.

and its not cool that girls feel they have to kill themselves slowly with diet to love themselves or feel ok or be accepted.



 

jesus antoinette. why dont u relax. are u gonna rag me now? how does that make you any better than me then? u seem to think really poorly of me and thats fine, but why dont u go by ur own principles then, instead of bashing me for saying my opinion.

and yes i have done reading. just because im not of the same opinion as you, it doesnt mean i havent read enough. about "snapping" out of it, i realize victims cant stop all of a sudden, but you would think accepting it would bring them closer to a healthier lifestyle. being labelled with a ED isnt cool, and most girls are in denial, so once its been called an ED and they say it themselves, you would think it would be just a tiny step in the right direction.

and clavicle, im happy to see that you are maintaining and are at a healthy weight. u look awesome :)

i wasnt trying to preach or anything. it was just my thoughts. youre welcome to read em and youre welcome not to.

*peeps in, hangs out for a bit* =)

the difference between me and you i guess, antoinette, is that you want me to feel a particular way about eds, and i respect your opinion.

but i think you are getting way too personal right now, which is why im asking you to relax.

i agree with clavicle that sometimes it's not about being beautiful or looking like nicole richie. sometimes the physical aspect is not their main focus. sometimes being thin means they feel like they have more control over their lives, or perhaps they want to "disappear". anyways, ed's are so much more than what the media portrays.

I'm sure as much fun as it is to.... well, whatever. =) How about focusing on something positive? Regarding the subject of EDs, there is a new member that is making positive changes in their habits to recovery from their experiences with an ED. How about stopping by and leaving an encouraging message of support?
http://www.calorie-count.com/forums/post/2879 4.html

I think this is an incredibly touchy issue.

It's really upsetting to see people killing themselves. It's EXTREMELY upsetting when you're already obese to see someone who is at the weight that you want to be at but is abusing their body.

I think, in the end, that's the problem many of us, on this site, have. That people who have the kind of body WE long for don't want it.

It's like... finding out that someone with the perfect life (define it however you like) wants to go out and cheat, potentially destroying their perfect life.

I'm only saying this to clarify the issue, as I see it. Not to add fuel to the fire. This is how you FEEL. That doesn't mean it's right. Or it's wrong. It just is.

Logic doesn't enter into it.

lollipop, i shall do that :)

and yeah subwaybusker, i can totally follow u in that!

thanks hk, thats exactly what im saying! a lot of girls are already beautiful and healthy when they go into their ed's! im just shocked at how widespread it is, especially online where everything is anonymous. especially those pro-ana websites, i had a look at one once, i was in SHOCK!

its awful what these websites say. or atleast i think so. nobody has to feel the same way.

*nod* i figured it was :)

And... you have a right to feel that way. And others have a right to disagree with you. :)

We can try to help those that want to be helped, the way that untied2gether does in the ED Recovery Club :)

To go on what hk said, I think its a reminder to all of us that reaching that goal weight of ours is not a fix-all in our lives.

I think we all have a tendency (no matter what our weight or our emotional state) to look at the lives of those around us and wonder why we can't be that happy, that thin, that beautiful, that adjusted, or that comfortable in our skin.

I think we have a tendency to oversimplify our emotions and tell ourselves we will be happy when we get to a certain place. However, as I think we all know emotional health goes way beyond weight. To be happy with our lives means so much more than just to be at a comfortable weight. Likewise, to be unhappy means so much more than wanting to change just the numbers on the scale.

We all recognize that our own struggles are complicated, frustrating journeys. However I think we tend to oversimplify the journeys of others.

I do this all the time when I look at someone and wonder "Why can't I be that happy?" In reality, I don't know their true story or their true struggle...

This is a little bit of a tangent off of what others have said, and I am in no way responding to any one thing that has been noted in this post. This is just what came to mind when I read through.

thank you- I've worked really hard to get here.. it's fustrating to me because I often hear, 'oh, stop trying to look like the olsen twins.. go eat a sandwhich.." I wish it was that easy. I guess I just want people to understand- I wasn't trying to be condesending or anything.

for me if someone's like go eat a muffin, or a sandwhich.. it's like if I was to ask you to eat a foot or something. I just wouldn't ever even think to.

lol, sorry the way u said it was jus funny

i didnt say that anyway. i dont go telling ppl with disorders to eat something, cuz obviously it doesnt work that way. besides a sandwich isnt gonna fix an ed...

jus as i said before, my point was that a lot  of girls end up with a ed because of media portraying wrong ideals for young girls. those olsen twins and paris hilton are ideals for some girls. when i was a younger, it was whitney houston and like the spice girls. they werent messed up looking (well ok the spice girls were, but not weight-wise, lol) and mind u, whitney looked  like a healthy woman back then.

now its olsen twins, paris hilton, lindsay lohan, hilary duff - all skinny!

there are girls who are like 10 who think they are too fat! kids that young shudnt even be worrying about their weight. and  no im not jus saying it cuz i was a skinny kid cuz i was a lil dumpling myself!!

I think I understand what you're saying...to a point.  There are a lot of girls on CC who are honestly looking for help, or looking to bring their ED under control.  These girls I respect for the steps they are taking to improve their health.

There are also girls who seem to be utterly unaware that they have a problem or what they're doing is unhealthy at all.  I think us CC-ers do a rather good job of directing these girls toward information about ED and where they can get help.

BUT

I really cannot stand the girls who come onto this site, are entirely aware that they have ED and come to BRAG ABOUT IT.  I really do not appreciate replies to some of my posts from 85 lb 16-year-olds telling me that "losing weight is easy" or "it just takes willpower, you need to have willpower" or "I lost [insert obscene amount of weight here] why can't YOU?"  It's offensive to everyone here who is attempting to lose weight and improve health without killing ourselves.