Girls in their 20's who want to lose about 100 pounds

Hi, my name is Suzanne and I am 23 years old. I weigh 258.3 pounds(yikes) and would really like to get down to between 140 and 150. I was wondering if there was anyone else out there in their 20's who has about that much they want to lose. We could work together and stay motivated to reach our goals!!! Also, if there is anyone in their 20's who has lost that much and wants to share their success story, I would love to hear it! Thanks!

i'm not quite 20 yrs old yet, but i definately need to lose 100 lbs!!!

Thanks boots. But the 3 ½ hours isn’t really that big a deal. Remember, that was over 2 days. And really, it’s not a lot even then. It’s 30 minutes of cardio, then the weight circuit, which includes a 45 second rest between each set, then another 30 minutes of cardio. And stretching, and stopping for water. So even though it seems excessive, it’s not really. Although I am sore as all get out right now. I’m not going anywhere near a gym till Sunday!

And I have my fingers crossed for you getting the job! And the elliptical sounds like it should be great to help keep your workouts up. 

Liza, when I lived in florida, I lived in fort myers. Kinda rural, kinda not. It was like in the transition phase from giant cowpie to over-developed golf/vacation community. And don’t get me started about florida summers! You can’t even go outside! First b/c of the heat, then the crazy storms. And in may, those lovebugs covering the entire left coast like a plague? Yuck! But Miami is the best, particularly in april, which is when I always visit (my b-day!)

And yeah, I got the trainer to get a jump on the next plateau. I seem to stall out for a while after every 20 pounds I lose, so I’m trying to avoid that this time around, and stop wasting time. And you’d better believe I paid for this w/ cash! No way would I go into debt to lose weight!

Hi morgan! We’re always happy to meet new girls, 20-something or not.

Howdy everyone!

Welcome everyone new!

Watchme, hang in there, chica!  You can do this!  And out of curiosity, why doesn't your doctor want to put you back on some of your meds?  If they're helping Sonini maybe they'll help you too...  Either way, keep at it, and I'm sure things will turn around for you soon! :-)

Dalma, you are WAY lucky!  I had a trainer 3 years ago (although I was a total 'tard and paid with my credit card... STILL paying that bad boy off, too) and now I'm friends with my ex-trainer and she doesn't even give me tips when I'm in the gym at the same time as her!  You are so, so lucky!  What a nice guy!  Honestly I probably would've done better with a male trainer than a female.  I like my ex-trainer a lot, but I needed an enforcer, and she was too nice to do that.  Also we talked non-stop during the entire session and although we became friends by the time my sessions ran out, I was paying to get in shape, not to get a new friend!  Lol!  I actually envy that you have time to work out that much!  I seem to never be able to squeeze in more than 3 workouts a week!

Boots, good luck on the job! :-) 

Liza, I'm sorry you didn't have better luck with the clothes shopping at Goodwill!  Try stopping by a few times a month; they always have new stuff coming in so it's possible that you'll find something soon!  And yeah, sometimes I wonder what people are thinking when they donate that stuff.  Not only is a lot of it out dated and just plain ugly, but also some of it is worn past the point of being wearable.  Ugh.  People are just plain awful sometimes!

Sweepie, I'm glad your hand is getting better!  Hang in there, chica! :-)

Dani, adjusting to living alone is super hard.  I've never lived with an SO, but I had a roommate all the way through college and then for three years after, and when my roommate and I parted ways I was so lonely at first.  Now I absolutely LOVE living on my own!  It's so freeing!  I know that you're also dealing with the end of relationship stuff, but to make the living situation a little bit easier in the beginning, what I did was start little "me" rituals.  Like every Tuesday night I used to pick something new to cook, either just a new recipe or a new ingredient, and I'd buy a bottle of wine, and rent a movie and have fancy dinner and a movie night in my underwear.  It sounds goofy, but it was nice to have a little me moment and not care about anyone else.  In any case, something like that might help make your place seem like home a little faster.  Also, good luck with the BLC weigh-in! :-)

So I went to the gym last night and worked hard and I feel amazing!  I made a honey cilantro salmon dish for dinner that turned out just okay (a little too sweet for me... I might add some spicy peppers to it next time to balance out the sweetness) and had a glass (okay, two glasses) of white wine to compliment it.  It was a really nice night!  I'm rediscovering the joys of working out and cooking all over again!  I'm excited that I seem to actually be re-motivated and not just wishing I was like I did a few times this summer.  I finally got all the hurricane weight off and I'm back down to 172 again, so things are looking up!

My one kind of bummer is the BF... He's totally supportive of me, and even though he's slightly incurious about the whole process, he compliments me and humors me when I want to cook something using turkey sausage instead of Italian sausage or add veggies to a meal.  The thing is that he's a big guy.  I find him totally gorgeous and attractive, but there's no denying that he's on the heavy side.  Lately he's been making off-hand remarks about losing weight, and I know he wants to, but I don't want to be pushy about it because I don't want him to think it matters to me.  I want him to do it for him, and only IF he wants to.  In any case, last night we were talking on the phone and I asked him if he was trying to lose weight, not in a judgmental way, but just out of curiosity and he got kind of agitated.  He said he was too tired at the end of the day to go work out and didn't have the time or the energy to cook the foods you have to eat to lose weight, and he just sounded so resigned and kinda upset.  And then he got off the phone with me.  

So my dilemma is this:  I want to help him lose weight.  I think if I just talked to him a little about what he could do and showed him that you can eat more than plain, baked chicken breasts and salad to lose weight, he'd be more likely to do it and it wouldn't seem so overwhelming.  I think if I cooked healthy for him more often and showed him how easy it actually can be to eat well, he'd be more likely to try.  And I think if we worked out together and supported each other, we'd both be more likely to keep it up.  We wouldn't even have to go to the gym; we could ride bikes together or something.  The thing is, I don't want to seem pushy about it, because I feel the same way about him regardless of what the scale says, and I want him to know that.  Should I wait to say anything until he actually asks me for help?  I've been mentally where he is before: that point where you just resign yourself to be fat forever and convince yourself that it'll never work no matter what you do and that it's just too hard.  And it is hard.  And it does take will power. And it does take work.  And no one can make you ready to do all that before the time is right for you to do it, which is why I spent years and years gaining weight before I got serious about actually losing it.

So my question is this: given that I know it's impossible to make someone ready to take on this challenge, should I just keep my mouth shut and wait until he's ready and asks me for help?  Or should I try to mention to him some of the things that might help him out with losing weight?  Would that just make him feel pressured?  

Sorry for being so long winded, ladies!  Thanks for bearing with me!  

Happy Friday! :-)

congrats on the pre-hurricane weight, ally!

in terms of the BF, i'm gonna answer from the p.o.v. of someone who's been asked by a bunch of other people to help them get started, even though they only half meant it.

if he asks, by all means agree to help him. if he just complains about his weight, tell him you think he's sexy as hell. don't say, "no matter how much you weigh." all he'll hear is that you think he's a fat slob. if it seems like he's hinting at wanting to lose weight, nod politely, even over the phone.

unless he specifically asks you to help him, any proactive suggestion you make will sound like criticism. so, if/when he finally realizes he wants to make some changes, go in 100%. but if he does ask for your help, be prepared for the possibility of him giving up on it pretty early in. support him if he does, but don't try to motivate him to get back into it (it'll sound like more criticism). in the meantime, just be his sounding board.

 

girls, have you ever known, or known of a guy that you can't have but you absolutely are dying over? i feel like a 13 year old with these silly little trivialities all the time, but whatever. there is this guy, this delicious mofo, that is smart, pensive, open, lives near me, and single as hell. but i can't have him! and it's driving me nuts!

i can't have him b/c i came across him on this message board (not THIS message board, but another one i frequent), and i don't really know him, and i'd feel like a total predator if i were to PM him and be all, you are so awesomely perfect! can i date you? i've been drooling over this jerk all week!

maybe he's into predators?? lol... seriously though, if he's on a message board I'm sure he's open to receiving messages from totally hot chicks! I think you should strike up a convo with him... what do you have to lose?!
Also, glad to hear the trainer is so cool. Most wouldn't do that so I think you totally lucked out!!!  woohoo!

ally - ditto what dalma said in regards to the b/f. Wait for him to ask and then give it 100%... until then, just reassure him that you think he's a stud.

dani - good luck with BLC weigh in this week... I'm sure you'll do fine! Living on your own definitely takes some adjusting... it's just going to take time. You'll get through this :)  Have you gotten any laptop suggestions yet? My b/f is hardcore into computers (builds/repairs/loves them lol) so I could definitely get some input for you. I think Toshiba's are a good brand for laptops.

boots - congrats on the job! Having an elliptical at home will be great!!

Thanks for the advice, ladies... You're right; I can't really say anything without him feeling like I'm being hyper-critical so I'll just keep my mouth shut.  He's a grown-up, and if he decides he wants to do something about it, he will.  

Dalma, I agree with Sonini... Totally message him!  What's the worst that could happen?  He says you're weird and never speaks to you again?  So what?  He's a total stranger and clearly not worth your time if he's going to react like that!  You really have nothing to lose!  I say go for it!  :-)

do you guys remember that episode of will & grace where jack sees luke perry studying the birds under karen's window, and he realizes that if he wants to make headway w/ him, he has to tread lightly b/c luke perry is a hot gay nerd? i kinda feel like that (minus the gay part). from all his posts, he seems like a fun but reserved guy. way nerdy, but equally hot. and i don't wanna look all aggressive by being so forward, but he just does NOT need to be single, especially when i'm available!

ally, you're a terrific wordsmith. can you help me out w/ a safe, cautious, yet flattering (and short) message to let hotty mcsmarty pants know i'm into him? pm me if you come up w/ one. i don't want it all over the internet, you know!

ally: i agree with everyone else: I'm the same way I get super upset when someone trys to tell me anything about weight. So let him approach you.....

Yes it's the job I want, I really want it, and I should find out Monday or Tuesday if I'm offered the position...I'm super excited ....It's taken me 5 weeks to finally almost get a job, lol! still all worth it!

o dalma:my bad, I didn't realize that was exercise in 2 days, I thought it was all in one day, great job though!

Dalma, wow, I'm totally flattered!  I admire your writing so much (I read your blog), and it's an incredible compliment that you think that!  Thank you! :-D  I'll think about it and PM you later on tonight after my kickboxing class!  There's no way he'll be single for long with a hottie like you after him! :-)

Boots, I'm totally sending good job juju your way! :-)

OMG, the most AMAZING thing just happened to me!  Do you ever have one of those days when you just feel smaller?  Where you walk around all day thinking, "damn, I feel skinny today!"?  I'm having one of those days.  And because I'm having one of those days, I decided to weigh myself even though I usually only weigh on Tuesday afternoons.  And WHOA!  I got on and off the scale 6 times to make sure it wasn't messing with me!  It said 169lbs!  I wasn't expecting to get into the 160s for a few weeks!  I'm sure it's one of those weird fluke "happy scale" moments, but I don't care!  I'm in utter shock!  YAY!  :-)

169? WOOHOO!!!!!!

yeah, i would totally appreciate whatever you send me, ally. but don't rack your brain too hard; i'm headed outta town in an hour or so for the weekend, so i'm not gonna be near a computer till maybe monday. plus, i'll be in the proximity of actual guys in the flesh (the best way to get over a guy, right? of course i'm referring to mr. philly, not hotty mcsmartypants.)

Welcome Morgan!  Don't worry, I'm only a few months away from no longer being a 20-something.  So close enough counts.

Dalma- love bugs, damn those things.  My car looks so nasty right now.  We get them in Sept apparently and ugh.  And I'd totally just send him a message.  Nerdy types don't necessarily hate aggression.  I met hubby online, randomly and not through any dating site.  But, we started messaging which eventually led to the need to talk on the phone, meet in person....the rest is history as they say!

Ally, grats on the weight!  I would complain to hubby all the time about my weight.  His response, which at first was like, huh, became something I loved.  He would say "Well, if it bothers you, then do something about it."   I realized that it had nothing to do with what he thought about my body and all about him knowing that I could do it all along.  And that he would obviously be supportive if I decided to do something about it.  The first time made me pause, cause he didn't immediately say "No, you're not fat" which would have been a lie.  I'm sure there was some comfirmation of him loving me at my size, but I don't remember that.  I worry about hubby's weight too.  Not nearly as bad as mine, but not what it should be.  I make things that trick him sometimes.  And at least he is eating the stuff that is better when you make it.  I'd show him (without him knowing) by making great meals and giving him just slightly larger portions then yours.  But, I'd wait until he asks. 

Well, I was at Sam's club getting my healthy food staples (Fiber One Bars, Laughing Cow Cheese, fruit) and saw a thing of jeans.  Started walking past it til I saw they were plus sized.  So I circled around and found a pair of size 24 Levis.  I did try them on at home to see how far I have to fit them.  I can totally squeeze them on.  And zipper them and everything.  But, definitely not wearable for a bit.  I've never had Levi's.  I mean, I've even tried them cause they never had them in my size (that I know of).  So, it's just kinda like, wow, I almost fit into a brand of jeans that I never thought I'd wear!  Ally said it before, there was a point that I just accepted that I'd be shopping at Lane Bryant and such stores the rest of my life.  I wasn't really trying, I wasn't really caring enough.  And just realized that was my life, that was who I was.  So to even have these brands that skinny people wear that I've never been able to put on my body EVER was just...wow.

Ok, need to make dinner.  I feel much more motivated the past few days.  While I was still working out and eating healthier, I was having a little more extras.  The cals that I don't count cause it's not much of anything.  Or taking a little bit here or there.  Or having extra things and logging over my calorie goal.  But, I really want this.  I really want to be able to do all those things I've never done.  Or wear what I've never worn.  I'm not getting younger, and I refuse to be like this for any longer.  Just wish it wasn't quite so much work and time.  But it took how many extra calories to get to my highest, what was I expecting?

Welcome Morgan - you're close enough....we'll let you in the "secret" club! :)

Dalma - geeky boys are adorable, aren't they?

Ally!!!!!!!! Congrats on the weight! That is sooo amazing. I remember how excited I was when I got down to 269....I'm farther away from that now, but that is awesome. Pat yourself on the back hot mama!

Liza - I totally get the "thought I'd be shopping at LB forever" thought. Then yesterday when I realized I'm close to being a 16, I thought, hell, I might be out of the store by New years! Most of the 14/16's are too big on my anyway. It doesn't help that I don't have a big chest AT ALL. And they assume that all bigger gals must have big knockers.

Ladies - I've been anxious all day about the biggest loser weigh in tomorrow. So after I post this I'm off to bed where I won't be able to worry (at least not consciously.) I'll give an update after the challenge/weigh in tomorrow. Night!

liza, that's awesome about the levi's! and your story a/b you and hubby gives me a little courage. also, i know how great it feels to fit brands the skinnies wear. it's like you fit in now. not into the clothes, but into the Normal Club. it feels terrific!

and dani, he's not just nerdy, he's insanely hot. like built (you should see his biceps [OMFG]), 6'5", cute, AND super smart. i'm basically having palpitations just thinking about his fine ass. and good luck on the weigh-in! you'll do great!

i'm still waiting to be picked up, so i'm pretty sure after this post, i'll talk to  you guys in a coupla days!

watchme: tell me again what clothing stores do you shop at? Additionally, I just had a friend diagnosed with PCOS, are there any websites that you would recommend? Hope your doing good, miss hearing from you !!!

it's too early to be up on Saturday....

hey ladies!

 

Welcome Morgan !

Dalma - lol with hot geeky boy!

Ally, 169? wOw! congrats on the weight loss... hopefully in a year or less I'm around that!!! 

Liza -glad you fitted into a Levi's! I also thought I would be a plus size forever and now I don't know what to think, I'm still in that weird phase where one size is way to big and the other is way to small.

boots, good luck with the job!

dani, good luck with the challenge!

watchme, we miss u!

I learned how to photoshop pictures on thursday, because had a whole workshop about that... It was a good reminder that anything -literally anything- you see in magazines and media is fake fake fake. I learned how to sculpt eyebrows, thicken lashes and even deflate cheeks, necks and backs! :O My picture of a normal sized woman turned into a bony mouselike being! :O

I had a cheat day yesterday, which was okay, walked about an hour but couldn't sleep very well because I had half of a frap (I split the drink with a friend) and I forgot that anything with caffeine after six pm keeps me awake for a loong time.

Have a great saturday!

boots, the soulcysters web site is the most helpful (just google that with pcos and your friend should be able to find it) but, there were a number of books that were much more helpful than any web site has been.  since i'm in ohio, i don't have them on me right now but i'll PM you the names. 

as for clothing stores, i think a lot has to do with your friend's style.  i am always looking for business casual clothes cuz of the nature of my job but also cuz that's just my fashion sense.... i either hang around the house in pajamas or else am always dressed in business casual like clothes when i'm just hanging out... the level of formality is obviously toned down a notch or two on weekends but for the most part, i'm just not a jeans-wearing kinda gal anymore.  i kind of lost that after college... partly cuz jeans weren't very comfortable for me after the size 24s range so i'd wear a lot of elastic pants or lane bryant slacks that didn't give me wedgies!!!!

anyway, so, with that huge disclaimer in mind, i shop at lane bryant, macy's and  jcpenney's (worthington line is especially good).  i occasionally go to dillard's when i'm in ohio (we don't have them in chicago).  lines that i wear (aside from LB) are:  worthington, liz & co, jones new york, nine west, nygard, style&co (macy's line), off 5th....  i can also fit into some ny&co but i'm using those clothes more as goal clothes.  i occassionally get cute stuff from H&M and Old Navy but the latter's stuff is usually much more casual than I'm used to.  I wore a lot of Old Navy during college and law school though... love their hoodies and stuff.  Hope that helps!! 

eventually, i hope to get all my clothes from NY&Co and Ann Taylor... I like them, they have good coupon sales and they have good quality stuff.... I also like Nine West and BCG Max and can find them for reasonable prices at Marshall's.  Banana, Limited and Express always strike me as way more expensive than they're worth... then again, we never get any good sales for them in Chicago cuz things sell out so quickly.  My mom finds amazing deals here in ohio.... I'm all about bargain shopping.  I can easily drop $150 in a shopping spree binge but end up having 20 nice work-appropriate things in my arms from doing so as compared to some of my friends who go to places like Banana and come out with 3 items only.

ana, i miss everyone here too.  i'm just really stressed out about so many facets of my life and am feeling really down so i've pretty much abandoned calorie counting lately cuz the thought of regulating myself that way when so much else sucks is just unbearable.  i'm not totally pigging out or skewing off course but i'm not calorie counting either.

Biggest Loser update - my team-mate and I won immunity yesterday in the challenge, and I ended up needing it. I only lost .4 pounds this week and would have been eliminated. Scary....see my journal for a more detailed account. (Didn't think to copy and paste and don't want to retype the crazyness.

Off to get in a little cardio. Adios muchachas!

Dani, grats on winning the challenge.  But, the other people have to get over themselves.  You needed 9 to win, they never said you have to go to each person to answer the questions!  Sorry people decided to take it out on you.  Really, if they had a problem with it, they shouldn't have lost as much weight so that they were lower than him.

Watchme, I can't wait to shop at Ann Taylor!  My sister gets all these pretty clothes from there.  I've noticed that they don't make clothes as pretty for us plus sized people. 

Yesterday was one of those days that I got a lot of stuff done around the house.  Hubby was out watching a football game that I really didn't care to go see.  And after he got home, we fought over stupid stuff.  And then I made myself dinner, but we went to Friday's even after that for him to have dinner.  I got the Angel Cake something or other.  Pretty good, overall, and apparently on the lower end, yeah, only about 500 cals!  I knew this going there, and knew that I could fit it in assuming I still worked out that night.  So, nice motivation to get my butt moving.  Although, my workout wore me out again last night.  Strange how time of day effects that (it was after 12).  And then I didn't eat anything after working out, which I normally do.  So woke up super hungry.  And a bit stiff today.  But, it'll work itself out.

Hello!

I recently joined this site to read the forums.

I began my weight loss journey on Sept. 1, 2008. I just moved to a new city so I thought this was the perfect opp. to begin my weight loss.

Anyway, I began at 240 lbs. and am now at 224 lbs.

I am 5'3 and my goal is to be at 130-140 lbs.

I portion control, but don't deprive myself of anything. Also, I visit the gym 5 times a week for one hour.

I look forward to reading posts in this community! :)