Girls in their 20's who want to lose about 100 pounds
Thanks for the welcome, ennazus (I don't know anyone's real/nickname on here yet)!
Today was a good day, and I actually met my calorie goal. I'm still REALLY stressed out about school, but things are slowly getting better. Tomorrow, I'm starting on the Couch to 5K running plan, and I want to see if I can actually do the first week workout without passing out!
alibuch - That's really sad about the ESL teacher! I'll definitely look into donating some money. It might not be much, but I can spare $1, I'm sure!
mladdy - You should feel sexy when you work out! I feel like a sweaty, tomato-faced, wheezing sack of lard, but after I shower and cool down, I feel so much better about myself. Instead of feeling down about how much weight I've gained and how I look, I feel like I'm doing something about it, and it really helps!
everyone else - I look forward to getting to know everyone on here! Good luck on your plans!
I think I may just have to start with you, luckyangelou! I searched the forums for the couch to 5k exercise plan, and here it is dalmalama: http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.s html
I used to jog/run almost 5 miles 5 days a week, but that was almost 7 years ago! I'd really like to see what I can do now! Keep me updated on your success, luckyangelou, and we can be cheerleaders for each other.
I've heard the walk across america walking program is fun too. You get a pedometer and log your daily steps and then you see how far you've walked on a map... people's goal is to walk the same number of steps as if they have walked "all the way across america."
mlady, where did you go to get those virtual models? i want to make one.
dalma, the guy definitely likes me personality wise and has turned down MANY a size 6 girl -- even the "hottest" one from this conference we all go to (well, i haven't gone since 2005 but they all go every year still). his sisters are size 12/14s and he thinks they look fine. so, i know i'm not dealing with a "no bigger than size 4 kind of guy." BUT, he doesn't want a big girl either. he's really thin himself -- 5'10" and 160 lbs. hence, the dilemma of meeting him. i'm too chicken at a size 24!
guys, i seem to be stuck in size 24s (and a few size 22s but mainly ones with elastic) and don't know when i'll finally fit into a size 20!!! it's REALLY frustrating to not switch sizes for POUNDS. my friends who are smaller sizes change sizes every 5 pounds or so!!! it's so unfair!! does anyone else feel like this?
i started fitting into size 24s comfortably at around 290 pounds and am not at 270 and STILL fitting into size 24s. i'm losing from my face and my shoulders and even losing inches around my middle but seriously ALL my weight is in my upper arms and around my stomach like a tire rim!!!! ahhh! my lower arms and lower legs are "normal" and my upper arms and stomach area just have globs of fat. no idea what to do but keep on trekking! i am guessing i have to lose at least another 20 pounds to get into some 22s and then another 30 to get into some 20s.
Good morning ladies! (ok, almost afternoon....)
suzanne... thanks for the thoughts! wow, I don't know how you keep up with this thread and respond to everyone! You're great! And while I was on vacation, I did actually eat whatever I wanted, other than choosing salads instead of fries... so I was totally surprised/stoked when I saw that I lost some weight!
watchmeshine... oh, I know exactly how you feel! I've lost about 15lbs in the past month and see absolutely no difference at all. It's a little frustrating! My pants are fitting exactly the same and it's driving me crazy! I figure once I get down to 270 (15 more pounds) then my pants will start feeling looser, and then maybe I'll fit into a 22 soon after (at least I better!). I figure about 10% of my body weight is a size.
Don't worry... we'll get there!! :)
on the jogging/running topic... god, I can't even imagine myself EVER jogging or running. I honestly don't think I ever have in my entire life! If I can get down to a weight where I am comfortable jogging, that would be such a HUGE accomplishment. I'm rooting for you guys!
I don't think there's a set amount of weight that moves us down a size... it's different for everyone. Everyone carries their weight differently. Mine is very evenly distributed and I carry my weight well... so when I lose a significant amount of weight (say 25lbs) I don't necessarily drop a size... my face thins out a lot and everything just gets a little baggy.
I don't think there's a set amount of weight that moves us down a size... it's different for everyone. Everyone carries their weight differently. Mine is very evenly distributed and I carry my weight well... so when I lose a significant amount of weight (say 25lbs) I don't necessarily drop a size... my face thins out a lot and everything just gets a little baggy.
I too feel like I've hit a bit of a wall, I lost a solid 50 lbs. only went down about a size and a half and now I've been stuck gaining and loosing the same few pounds. I know how easy it is to undo all the hard work I've put in, so eventhough I can not really afford it I booked myself an appointment with a personal trainer and going to treat myself to that I think twice a week for the next 6 weeks, it's my 50 lbs lost present!!
I'm going away in April, and I'm going to see family that I haven't seen in a long while and I'd really love to be another size down.
i am SO there with you guys on the sizes. i've lost about 50 lbs, too. i've gone down... 2 and a half sizes. i'm really hoping to lose that other half size in the next ten pounds, but who knows? i re-gained 16 or so lbs the end of last year and i still wore the same size i'm wearing now that i've re-lost that weight. although, my jeans are starting to fit looser around the waist. i super hope i go down another size soon. losing a bunch of weight and not being able to fit new clothes sucks! plus, i have pretty huge boobs that don't help matters when it comes to getting smaller tops.
watchme, did he out and out tell you he doesn't like bigger girls? hasn't someone (or you) described to him what you look like? if not, i think you should soon, so you don't get your hopes up even higher if for some reason your weight is a dealbreaker for him.
I used to run, my freshman year of college. well, jog. it was prettty fun. i never got up to jogging long distance, but i'd like to be able to jog again.
luckyangelou - I am starting the couch to 5K program myself. I did it one day already and wasn't able to quite make it all the way through, but i did walk the rest (just skipped that last 2 running parts). So my advice is don't feel discouraged if you can't do the whole program right away. The point is to build up to it.
Good luck and maybe we can encourage each other on!
am thinking about this further and decided that aggressive calorie restriction and ramping up the exercise is the ONLY way to get to a size 20. i was a size 20 at 235 lbs in college and i am a much fitter looking size 24 now than i was in law school so HERE is THE plan. i am going to lose 3 lbs/week from here on out to get me to a size 20 by the end of may. NO EXCUSES.
1600 calories/day and LOTS of exercise -- going to make my weekends all about exercise that i enjoy: my latin craze and salsa dance classes, swimming, and elliptical. biking and tennis too when it warms up!! shopping with my ipod in the downtown area! i'm going to move, move, move! also going to prep for a 5K walk i'm doing for a battered women's shelter that is in early june! it's ON!
going to continue my weekday dance classes: tango and hip hop on mondays, salsa on tuesdays, swing and latin club on wednesdays, and swing on fridays! gonna add in a ballroom class or two if i'm not dying. going to start lifting weights -- at least arm ones when i'm on the phone with family or watching tv.
going to keep up the cooking of pakistani veggies to get more veggies in my life. going to cut back on the raisin bran and increase the egg beaters. going to not be lazy and going to go to the market and buy fresh strawberries and blueberries. going to continue to munch on carrots at work throughout the day instead of munching on nuts. going ot try to cut down on eating fiber one bars and 100 cal snack packs and stick to carrots and fruits as much as possible.
to recap: eating EVEN BETTER than before + 8-10 dance classes a week, more walking (SHOPPING!) to keep me moving, elliptical and swimming!!! will add in biking and tennis when it warms up come end of april!!! I AM GOING TO DO THIS!!!!!!!
dalma, i told him that i was a size 30 and down to a size 22/24, aiming for a size 14. his response was "i have no concept of that." he thinks size 14 is fine and that i should not be so insecure and that things aren't all about looks, they're about chemistry in general. i think my current weight would be a deal breaker -- i think it would be for ANY south asian man i meet. the guys i've met in their late 20s are all either youngish boy looking and very scrawny (5'10" and 160 lbs is normal) or else have big old potbellys and balding. sad reality. all of them are used to size 2s. i was shocked this guy didn't care about figure as much. he doesn't care about looks as much as personality -- my best friend met up with him a few times in nyc and said that he is really respectful around girls, was not flirtatious even though girls were throwing themselves at him, etc. when asked why not, he just said that the girls were kind of "ditzy" and that he wanted someone who he could talk to and who was "more than just a pretty face." he DID say he likes girls with nice legs and wavy hair though, hahaha. SO, we know he's not shallow but he's also a BOY still!!!
I should add though that i've seen TONS of family pics of his 3 sisters and a bunch of his cousins and NONE of them really seem to be the size 6 types. SO, he's used to being around women who have a bit more meat on them. the skinniest of girls are size 10s, the norm seems to be about a size 14, and there are some size 16-20 girls in there too. so, at least i know he's used to being around "bigger" women and maybe that's why he considers a 14 to be an average figure unlike most men!
I look a MILLION times better at 235 lbs... NO TIRE RIM around my waist basically like I have now so my hope is that that is the case once i get down. SO, once i'm at a size 20 (END OF MAY!!), I am going to send him a full-length picture. he's seen pics of me from high school/college so he probably thinks i'm there (235 lbs). until then, not getting my hopes up. the fact of the matter is, the only thing keeping me from meeting him is ME and my insecurity and i am going to do something about the insecurity -- lose more weight!!!! we only talk once a week anyways and we're "friends" until and unless we meet. he wishes i would be willing to meet but says he understands. i know he could move on in the mean time and hence, feel the time pressure that i have mentioned to so many of you before.
watchme, DO NOT kill yourself trying to get to a certain size by a specific date. your plan sounds a little hasty. you know 3 lbs/wk is too much, no matter how much weight you need to lose.
how often are you exercising each week? i really think you might be overdoing it, and your body is trying to hold on to every pound it can, for fear you're about to crash.
take a deep breath. take a few deep breaths. you're not in a race. you know that. you'll see 235 eventually, and smaller numbers after that. in the meantime, you don't want to hurt yourself.
You also should be honest with him. It's not fair to him. A picture from high school? I mean... you're out of law school so you obviously don't look as young as you did then. You should show him a current photo. He seems like a nice guy... You have to have some faith in that.
lawgirl25 - Yay, I'm glad to hear that you tried it and made it so far on the first day! I'm going to try to get through all of it.
dalmalama and mladdy - You should totally give it a try! The link that mladdy posted is the one that I'm using. I'll let everyone know later tonight how it goes. I'm going to do it on a treadmill inside to keep the impact on my shins and knees low. We have an indoor track, but I think the treadmill would help me keep track of the time better.
watchmeshine82 - I don't really know about your situation and "the guy," but I too struggle with pounds vs. inches. When I did the South Beach diet a few summers ago and lost 30 lbs, I only lost one size! However, that was my pants. My shirts and dresses all fit looser and better in my upper torso. My lower tummy is my problem area, and I can easily lose my other fat, but my tummy tub never goes away. I know how frustrating it can be! Just hang in there.
Hope all is well with everyone else!
hey girls,
don't worry, i am more talk than reality, so with an aim of 3 lbs a week, i'll probably lose 2 at best, given the PCOS struggle too. i just need to get myself pumped up and say i'm going to be super good to keep me going!! my doctor has told me that losing 3 lbs a week is not a problem at my weight but that it will eventually slow down because i cannot healthily create calorie deficits food wise at lower weights. (skinnier people need less calories to maintain their weight so they can't create as big of deficits at eating say 1600 calories a day.) my doctor said that starvation diets (under 1200 calories) and over-exercising (like people who exercise 8 hours a day) is not the way to go.
over the course of 7 weeks, i lost 16 lbs through 4 exercise sessions (6 hours) of elliptical work outs a week (4000 calories burned) and through healthy eating (1800-1850 calories a week). now, i signed up for these unlimited beginner's dance classes (and can do 8 hours of that per week), so i'm going to switch to doing that and try to do only 2 sessions of elliptical (2000 calories total/week) and maybe get in 2 swims. the swims are very leisurly (so i probably only burn about 800 calories total/week). i know 8 dance sessions sounds like a lot but only 2 are dance aerobics classes. the others are more instructional and burn about 400 calories at best/session. they are SO fun though. dancing and swimming and horseback riding.... they all burn more calories than the "norm" activities like shopping and stuff but they are just fun for me now and not seen as exercise... there's no breaking a sweat really... i've noticed that my friends who stay thin have made these sorts of activities a part of their every day life and are still more active than i am even!!
food wise, i have previously aimed at 1800-1850 but our WW people said we're usually underestimating by about 100-150 a day so i am going to lower my aim a little... plus, now that i'm in the 260s, the WW lady said i need to eat less "points."
ali - i didn't send him any pics. he has seen many current headshot pics from facebook. (the main pic is always a headshot basically). then, there are pics that have been tagged by friends from both senior year of high school ('99) and college, some of which are full profile shots. i was a size 20 in all of those pics. between size 20 and size 24 though, i seem to have put on the majority of my weight in the upper half of my upper arms (you can tell from some of my pics -- my arms have these funky fat rolls) and also my stomach area. it's like a straight line with a big circle and then a straight line.... i wish i was more evenly distributed weight wise.
the reason i haven't sent pics is because the guy and i decided from the get go that we were friends but he has definitely said he wants to meet because he thinks we have the potential for more than friends -- our conversations, personality, what common friends have said, all lead him to believe that. i said i wasn't ready and wanted to meet guys when I feel like I like myself and my body -- so he said he understood and would respect my wishes but that he would continue talking to other people and to talk to me as friends. not wanting to pressure myself TOO much with deadlines and feel sad, i have continued to talk to him once a week. he is DEFINITELY looking at other people and i am okay with that. i do want to meet him as soon as possible though... and i know that both of our families (since this was a family friends arranged sort of deal) really like what they know of each other and think we make a good couple on paper.
It's very hard to explain the cultural difference here because things aren't so simple. it's not just about him and i clicking. it's also about his family liking mine, his family thinking i'm pretty enough, etc. it's kind of messed up but in some ways you basically are marrying each others family (including EXTENDED famiy) and you see them at least twice a month as opposed to a few times a year for holidays like so many of my non-south asian friends.
it's very hard for me to sit here feeling like someone is out of my league, feeling like a wuss, fearing rejection. on the other hand, we are still friends and i do get to talk to him once a week and i know that when i'm ready to meet, he will meet me. if he has met a girl by then, i will be sad and consider it to have not been meant to be. if he's still single (highly likely given he's a crazy med student working 80 hours a week and spends his one day off a week hanging out with my male best friend who now lives in ny) then i will hoop and holler and meet him and hope all works out. until then, the situation gives me hope, something to work toward.
he's NOT the reason i was able to sit through lunch today and NOT take a brownie or big cookie off the tray -- my own desire to lose weight since i was 8 years old is what is fueling that -- but remembering something sweet or funny he says sometimes makes me smile at times when i would otherwise be down in the dumps and reach for food for emotional comfort.
anyway, do NOT worry! i'm checking in with my doctor once a month, i see a nutritionist every month, and i'm also going to 2 weight watchers sessions a week so i'm not killing myself! just having fun and learning to lead a happy, full, fit life!
And I DEFINITELY understand about cultural differences. I thought it was bad in the States but at least here in Korea everything is centered around looks. You can't get a job if they don't think you're pretty enough, it's the same with the guy's family thinking you're good enough, etc. Hell! Even ESL teachers here have to send photos... and some schools, if they think you are too ugly or too fat, they won't hire you.
Original Post by alibuch:
I've had to force myself to be more outgoing and fight through any social anxiety I had and that seems to have made the difference.
that's really what it's all about. once you're able to truly love every bit of yourself and stop putting yourself down b/c of your weight or think less of yourself, things will be a lot easier going socially.
now, that's not to say i have experience with the arrangement you're going through, watchme, although like i said before, i have heard of that plenty of times. and i get that if you and he were to hit it off, you'd probably be married fairly quickly, right? and your two families would be really, really into your relationship. am i right so far? i know how much it sucks when looks are one of the top priorities. no one's ever out and out said that to me, but i can only imagine how tough it is for you. but think of it this way, his family still likes you, right? if they didn't, they wouldn't have suggested the two of you get together.
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