Girls in their 20's who want to lose about 100 pounds

Hi, my name is Suzanne and I am 23 years old. I weigh 258.3 pounds(yikes) and would really like to get down to between 140 and 150. I was wondering if there was anyone else out there in their 20's who has about that much they want to lose. We could work together and stay motivated to reach our goals!!! Also, if there is anyone in their 20's who has lost that much and wants to share their success story, I would love to hear it! Thanks!

i'm gonna stop posting so much, i swear, but i had a question pink. i'm writing a story, and one of the main characters grew up in wyoming. i picked it because it seems, to me, like nobody lives in wyoming. my character's jewish, which, i think, doesn't really belong in wy. which is why i put him there. can you tell me a little about wyoming, people-wise? you can PM me, if you want.

edit: fallon and ally, i noticed you guys are both in houston! and you're both going to the rodeo (i think). you should meet up!

mm... dark hair and green eyes.... 

Oh, hello ladies!! :)

I've been away at a conference for a few days and just got back to work this afternoon (of course, no one else came back to work, but I HAD to... grrrr).

Anyways, lots of talk about boys and bitches lol.. love it.
I'm also one of the big girls who never had any problems with getting made fun of while I was growing up. I had amazing friends and was always part of the "in crowd". It always used to confuse me when people made fun of other girls who were actually smaller than me, then again, I never stood up for the other girls so I was just as bad. I've never had low self esteem... but I admit that being overweight has DEFINITELY held me back in life. It has kept me off rides at amusement parks (because I was scared), it has kept me from meeting men (because I was scared), and it has kept me from enjoying so many things. Time to change that!
I totally get what fallon was saying though. In general, being overweight has not kept me from meeting men and getting physical with them, that's for sure lol. BUT, it has kept me from completely opening up to them and allowing myself to fall for them, because ultimately, I'm afraid I'll end up hurt. We're all different though. And our weight affects us all differently. It's not fair for us to judge eachother for the way we let our weight affect us. I think that if we aren't comfortable in our bodies and want to wait to meet a guy (watchme), then we should wait! If you listened to everyone else and just went and met him now, it would probably backfire anyways. Not because he wasn't attracted to you, but because you wouldn't let him be attracted to you because you aren't attracted to yourself!
We're all attracted to different things and there is no possible way of knowing who will be attracted to you. I for one am not attracted to overweight men in the LEAST! Sure, tall & thick is ok (I'm thinking football player), but overweight... nope. Not gonna happen. It's just the way it is. Call me a hypocrite, but I can't help it.
And ya, I've judged overweight girls before too. I'm not going to deny that. So I know people judge me too... so whatever. I could care less.
Losing weight is about me. No one else.

Ok, I really have no idea where that long rant came from. I don't even remember what I was going to write about before lol.
Well, I just got back from a conference and my god, I ate SOOOO much. And then last night I went out and drank SOOOO much! It was fun though, so I don't regret it. I even met some guys and it was a total confidence booster!! I might regret it tomorrow when I get on the scale though, but I'll deal with it then.

And as for the boy... *sigh*. I caved. He apologized and I caved. He's coming down tonight for a couple of days. I'm definitely going to give him a piece of my mind though, and possibly an ultimatum! Wish me luck!

You blink and you miss a whole weeks worth of conversation...

I must agree I too am a dark hair liking kinda girl, but then again I'm not into the pretty boy looks and those go better with blond.

Welcome to all the new people, Fallon, love your attitude!!!

Mladdy, don't think I ever wished you a happy birthday...never to late to extend the party!! :)

Rider, back to a few days ago I'm totally with you about making choices in the store....and so far doing great with that!

Watchme, keep your head up, your dedication is great, you don't want to add to stress in by way of extra pounds that you've already lost ;) I know easier said than done, but stay strong!

Booster, I'm just like you, get all teary about weight and stuff related, just today I was emailing a friend and the email was touching on weight related issues and I found myself welling up.

And I get the you've got a pretty face all the time! but my mom generally doesnt even say that, she just says "if you were thin you'd be pretty" and the one I just love is "if you were think you'd be married!" And then I have a grandmother than isn't such a fan of overweight people, including her grandchildren, to her its all a sign of weakness.

Dalma, people close to us tend to say some pretty mean things, but also wanted to add that when its from a stranger its easier to forget or sometimes not even hear, it hurts more only because it's from someone you love and are close to.  If they weren't your "friends" you would care what they say as much.  I know it's a tough pill to swallow.

Also from a guy I can almost understand a "fat comment" lets admit they don't always think with their heads, but for a women who is supposed to have some compassion its just hard to hear.

Though had a nice story about a guy :) my brother to be exact!! He is staying at me for a little, he also was a little heavy, but really not much and recently lost 30 lbs and looks perfect for his height and build, I don't like the skinny types too much, but he actually lost more staying with me since there is only healthy stuff in my house!! But then I went out to buy him some not so healthy treats, told him I need to fatten him up a little so I can look thinner than him :) yes he does think I'm a little nuts!!  Anyway I was trying on my biggest weight skirt which I'm keeping till the end and maybe forever!!! and he couldn't believe it, he was totally shocked how big it is on me...and then I was saying like "ugg I have so much more to go" and he looked at me and said, "but you're not fat anymore!! and then added things like, you're face got so thin and you look great" which to someone that still weighs close to 250 was like unbelievable, talk about bringing on the waterworks! Also it's comforting that there really are people that see different things.

And I don't write as often as everyone else, but really keep reading and getting encouraged from everyone, so thanks all!

Good afternoon Ladies,

Wow how some of you ladies post remind me of my past.  I also was the big one in my group of friends in high school.  I look back at the pictures and I don't look that much different then my friends(how I wish I looked like that now).  I was a 14 all of high school I met my now husband about a year after high school and started putting on the weight.  I don't remember if people made fun of me if they did I think I blocked it out but I just remember always feeling like everyone was looking at me because I was so big.  I never really had a "date" until I started dating my husband (we were set up on a blind date). I think a big part of that was my own fault I am sure I put off a I know your not going to like me so don't even try vibe.  Anyway I just wanted to say hi but then so many of your post touched me I had to put in my 2 cents.  I hope all of you have a wonderful day.

jessica

I've been reading every day since my last post (sometimes a couple of time a day), but I just haven't posted for whatever reason.  Anyway, things are going ok.  My life is still full of drama, and I still don't have a freakin' job...  But, I'm doing so well with my weight loss!  Before I got a new scale, it was reading me under 200 (8 pounds difference from the new one).  I was really bummed by that, but now I'm 2 pounds from the *true* under 200 mark!

Alright, so some replies are in order.

pinkcobra- Thanks for confirming what I thought was true.  Yes, I do look better, don't I!?!  Way to go for the weight lifting.  How long have you been at it?  And when did you first notice improvements?

Boots- I also look back on my high school years and wish I could have a talking to with that young lady.  I was a 12/14 and cute!  If I had only been more confident with myself back then, I probably would not have spiraled to the weight I am at now.

Ali- I'm also with everyone who would love to get your  soup recipe.  I love trying new things and spicy is yummy!

jamie1928- You can definately work with us here!  It helps to vent and let all the frusterations of changing to healthy choices out.  We'll definitely be here to cheer you on.

riderchick- I'm a huge Trader Joe's fan.  Their prices are great, but I always end up buying more than what I went in to get.  Like I said to Ali, I love trying new things, so I'm always picking up interesting finds!

dalmalama- Sounds like you jumped into the deep end of the weight training pool!  That takes determination and courage!  Just make sure you don't do so much you're afraid to do it again next time.  Baby steps :)

riderchick- You're into pilates?  I've always been too timid to try those.  Do you recommend any beginners' dvds?

allydan- We're at a twin weight!  That's awesome that your body knew when to stop even when not counting!  I'll have to test that out one of these days :)  And you're totally welcome for the encouragement.  Thank you for giving it back in return!

watchme- It's such a relief to go back to what you know works!  It's hard to eat the right things when there are so many others influencing your decisions.  It may be a good idea to pull back some of the exercising you were doing.  You don't want your body to get too used to things anyway.  Plus doing closer to maintenance for a little while will ensure your metabolism stays strong!

riderchick- When you said you're from SE Michigan, the first thing that popped into my head is "She's a troll!"  LOL!  I was born and raised a Yooper.  Ya sure ya betcha!

pinkcobra- I feel exactlly the same about how this would have been had I "went it alone."  I probably would have lost hope after too drastically cutting calories, binging, and ended up heavier than when I started.  Thanks to everyone who has educated me, encouraged me, and been an example, I'm still here and NEVER GOING TO GIVE UP!

dalmalama- You are too funny for picking the ethnicity of your next boyfriend!  When I was very young (11 or 12), I just knew I would be with a black man at some point.  I have junk in my trunk!  I didn't try to make this happen, but I did marry a man from Ghana.

watchme- That crap that you have to deal with SUCKS!  I know it's hard, but try to overcome those feelings and focus on the positive.  It won't hurt to have a back up plan in gear with your job concerns.  I respect you for deciding to wait until you meet the guy.  You will definitely be more attractive with extra confidence!  And I think I speak for everyone that we would much rather have you vent until your fingers fall off from typing than to have you disappear and  worry about you wondering where you've been.  We're all here to help each other out anyway, so please don't feel bad about wanting/needing help.

feddiechick- I busted when you said you wanted to throw on a mumu and eat frosting!  I have soooo been there!  My mom never purposefully raved about my smaller/prettier sister, but it did hurt when she was put in a pageant at 11 or 12.  I was the chubby little sister and remember not liking my body at that early age (she's 4 years older than me, so I was 7 or 8).  I couldn't fit into hand-me-downs from that age on either (Even my feet were bigger than hers after the 6th grade!).

pinkcobra- That would be cool to have a friend teach exercise classes!  You know you'd always feel like you belong there that way!  I'm not a member of the Y, though I would loooove to take advantage of all of the different activities they havae to offer.  I use the little workout room at my apartment complex.  They've got 2 treadmills, an elliptical, a recumbent bike, and 4 weight machines.  If it weren't for the tv, I'd be bored out of my mind!

Boots-  Good for you for listening to your body about needing a break.  I gave myself a break the other day and ended up losing 1.8 pounds on the next mornings weigh in!  My sneeky body was hanging on to them, because I was probably pushing myself too hard on the workouts.  I love your story about meeting your hubby.  I'm glad you saw him at the right moment for you, even if that meant him seeing you before making changes.

dalmalama- See, I shouldn't make excuses at night about exercising!  I've done this in the past, rationalizing that it's going to take me an hour to workout, 10 minutes to relax, 10 minutes to shower, and too much time for my hair to dry before bed.  Now I do it whether I have the time or not, and more often than not I cut the shower down to 3 mintues and sleep on sopping hair because I'm just too pooped!  I wish I had a bed to myself, because I would totally flop down, shoes on and everything and wake up in the exact same position in the morning if I had the chance.

watchme- I also never dated in high school.  I grew up in a very small town where I was labelled the fat, bully girl (I used to show that I liked a boy by chasing him, pushing him, or taking their things.  A guy friend in high school confessed that he was afraid of me in grade school.  I guess I used to pinch him!?!)  My first kiss was with a gay guy and staged, because we were in a play!  My first boyfriend was my husband.  It's hard to draw confidence about guys if you've never really had a chance to experience it before.

Fallon- Welcome to the forum!  I have to admit that was a little intimidated by your confidence.  If we were to have met in high school I probably would have avoided you, since you probably have no clue what it's like to feel the way I have felt about myself.  Actually, I'm probably more jealous of you than anything!  What I wouldn't give to not care about what people think about me!  I'm working on that though, but it's a process, just like losing weight is.  And I was one of those kids that was teased a lot when I was little, never once asked out or asked to dance, never went to the prom, and not once was asked to go to a party.

yessica- I look forward to the day where we rename this thread, but I think we'll be skinny AND compassionate, so maybe bitches won't be in the title :)  My husband can also eat any kind and amount of crap he wants.  Although, his metabolism is messed up to the other extreme.  He can't put weight on.  This doesn't help me, because he won't refrain from eating the tempting foods and has no clue what it's like to struggle with being overweight.  I'm looking forward to you telling your story about how you met your husband.  I'm a sad sap and find joy in other people's relationships.

feddiechick- I am thankful for you and all of these other precious people I have met too!  You're in the ranks of "AMAZING" women yourself!

allydan- Have fun tonight!

Ali- Isn't it great how maturity can help to highlight our strengths and self-image?  I love myself more today than I did a few years ago, and definitely more than a few months ago!

Boots- I feel for your right now.  Those awful memories never go away and scar us.  My goal is to gain while I lose.  I want to gain more self respect and confidence as I lose inches and pounds.  You are going to amaze yourself through this process!  (big hugs)

dalmalama- I agree that those who are closest to you can hurt you the most.  We allow ourselves to become vulnerable with them, and they know how we work inside and out.

dalmalama- ROFL!  An "equal-opportunity girlfriend!"  I agree that plain and simply, I love attention from any man.  I've got my quirks about what catches my eyes though (red-heads, great smiles, heavier-set/beefy men, bedroom eyes, dark hair with light eyes, and on and on).  But PLEASE, don't stop posting.  Anything and everything you contribute is appreciated (and usually funny and/or motivating!)!  Good luck with your story.

sonini- I'm sure we've all said or though something none too pleasant about others (fat/skinny, tall/short, etc).  It sucks when we do, but we're all just human.  About "caving," maybe you just need him at the moment, no matter how difficult being with him is?  I think that's exactly what it's like with my husband.  Yeah, it really sucks a lot of the time, but I'm just not quite mentally ready to do anything about it.

safantasia- "You blink and you miss a whole weeks worth of conversation..."  I totally agree, but I love it!  It keeps me from getting bored or going to the fridge to eat, just to give me something to do!  Thanks for the b-day wishes too :)  Ooooh, the women in your family need a dose of compassion for others!  I don't want to diss your fam, but they're down right mean and ignorant!

Jessica- It's easy to relate here.  I find that a lot of my own experiences are being shared by these other wonderful women.  It's like part of my family I never knew I had!  Thanks for "putting in your 2 cents."

I have a great time keeping up with all of you.  Thanks for being so active with posting!

mladdy -- all i can say is HOLY MOLY.  how the heck you keep up with ALL of us is beyond me. 

everyone -- thanks for the support.  you'll be happy to know (maybe, i'm still not satisfied) that the bitchy housewife went and apologized to the property management office (who had gleefully informed her that contrary to her belief that my mother was lying about having a daughter who was a lawyer that lived in the building -- that my mother has a masters degree, is married to a doc, has both a lawyer AND a doctor for daughters and is NOT a cleaning lady.  i just HATE the stereotyping.  that b/c we have black hair and light skin we must be the hired help rather than successful, well-educated and hard working individuals).  UGH, i still wanna smack her.

still not sure what to do about the job thing.  the main problem is that i'm already at a place that is "decent" for hours and think that they are pretty demanding (65 hours a week) so i don't know whether i would survive at some of the other places in town (more like 75 hours a week).  *sigh*

as for "the boy" he has brownish black hair and hazel eyes (greenish, light brown) and is completely gorgeous so just wanted to get everyone's approval ;)  if it's meant to be with him, it will work out.  thanks for supporting my decision to wait it out.  i know he thinks size 14 girls are attractive so i'm thinking that with the continued help and support from ya'all and dragging my butt to dance class/the elliptical, that's not TOO far off, right ladies??? :)

SIZES.  I need a little education here.  I KNOW everyone's size varies based on height and where they carry weight but does anyone have a GENERAL sense of weight/height/sizes or does anyone know of any chart I can look at?  I've found ones for inches on JC Penney's web site but that's about it.  Here are my guesses for me based on past experience and talking to friends around my height (i'm 5'3"; i surveyed people between 5'2" - 5'5"):

(currently) 270 = size 24

255 = size 22

230 = size 20

210 = size 18

190-210 = size 16 (I've heard quite the range for this.  Wondering if the difference here is a "16" versus a "16W"?)

180 = size 14 (again, heard quite a range from 175 to 195 so am wondering whether this has to do with 14 versus 14W)

165 = size 12

150 = size 10

135-140 = size 8 (this is the only number that EVERY person i talked to agreed upon!)

tferrell935: Hi and welcome! congratulations on the thirty pounds lost! Stick with it!

r6riderchick: I didn't watch "I can make you thin" but one of the ladies I work with said it was really great. What did you think? By the way I love good coffee too! There is a gas station/food stop by me called wawa and they have the best fat free french vanillacappuccino! It is so great, and I believe around 100 calories per serving too! Yay for fitting into a 14! I am aspiring to be back in a 14 by new years! I also want to get down to a 10, then maybe work into an 8. I think I would feel so fantastic then! My diet starts with a list too. I am kind of out of good for me options right now, so I haven't been choosing as widely as I should, but I am going grocery shopping tomorrow! I actually have always hated grocery shopping. Ugh, if I spend 20 minutes in the grocery store I feel like I was in too long. So I just grab whatever and go. Actually, I am a sale hunter, so I buy whatever is on sale. I just prefer to spend my time doing real shopping!

sonini: I am so jealous you went to see Dirty Dancing...that is like one of my favorite movies! Boo the boy who cancels on you for a flat tire! He should have been so desperate to see you that he walked to see you! Have you ever heard of a Canadian group called McMaster and James? I love how they sing, but they have a track called "I understand." You should definitely check it out, I am sure you will be able to relate! You give that boy hell!

alibuch: Don't they have good coffee in Korea? Poor you! I am like you in the sense that I was never made fun of in school, never had lack of dates, but when my husband or any other guy has ever said I was beautiful I am like yeah right! I neve believe it either because I don't see it in me.

dalmalama: I grew up in Manhattan, so when I moved to PA and there wasn't a starbucks on every corner it was culture shock for me! I always swore I would never ever ever get married. Domestic bliss? Not for me! I wanted to live my life, my way, with maybe a companion. No kids, no strings. But my whole  outlook has changed. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with your outlook either...that's what I wanted myself for a long time! I hate the bratty muscle heads at the gym too! When I used to go with my friends, we would grab a few weights and go into one of the empty class rooms and then we wouldn't have to worry about what anyone else was doing!Way to go on starting on strength trading. When I used to go to the gym, I always loved to do that. I have to agree that moms are the best to vent to! I would be lost without mine!

safantasia: How lucky are you to wind up with a trainer who massages your back!!!! Aww your brother is sooo nice!

allydan: I can so relate to thinking I was so huge when I was a 14, and missing it soooo much now! I have 14's  too that are so cute and it's like....well thats way to small for me still! If you change your mind about the crank calling just let me know! He may just be busy. I mean, busyness happens to the best of us right?

dalma & rider: I have to admit...when you find the right guy...he will drive you crazy enough to keep that kind of new feeling going. Honestly, my husband is always full of surprises (some of which I want to punch him in the head for) mostly of a sweet nature. It's fun to grow together!

bootster: I wasn't looking for my husband when I met him either, but we will be happily married for 2 years this year, and I love him so much! Yay 4 pounds lost! It's something! Yay for walking when you don't want too! Bet it felt great! I too need 8 hours minimum of sleep or I am soooooo cranky! That's right! Me. Cranky! Don't let your mom get you down. You can stand up for her, and remember, you are losing weight to appease yourself, no one else!

danibelle: congratulations on choosing health over drinks! It's so cute how your boyfriend is willing to hold off on a hair cut while you lose weight! Don't forget to take pictures the day before he finally gets one!

watchme: I carry my weight primarily in my legs. I have these big fat calves which I think are bigger than most girls waists! I have always had big calves and thighs, but it didn't ever bother me too much because I used to have an ok midsection. I just always hated to wear dresses! I want to wear a dress and feel pretty! I can't believe someone was that rude to your mom! That bites! I would be fuming! You can always vent here...that's what here is here for!

pinkcobra: Yay vacation! Way to go on eating well while on it! You and your hubby will have adorable kids! I haven't been keeping up so well lately...school is kicking my butt!

mladdy: Don't be sad that 30 lbs isn't enough for other people to notice. You notice right? I mean it has to feel good to go down in size! And your pictures are gorgeous! You have the cutest son ever too!

jamie1928: Welcome to our group! How did you go about losing 116 pounds? Way to go on the 22 pounds you have lost! You can do this!

feddichick: maybe your mom thinks you don't want to hear her bragging about you and that you would be modest...so she doesn't do it in front of you??

fallon: way to go being able to have so much confidence!

 

 

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am completely caught up! Until I blink that is! Lol

Anyway...I did pretty good today. My husband brought me a cupcake after dinner, and I only took one (small) bite! Yay!

Oh, and I have a funny story. I have this really fancy homedics scale...it's like top notch and I have no idea how to work it. It was originally a $120 scale and I got it at bed bath and beyond for $4 because it was open box. I love that store. Anyway, this morning I hit some button accidentally before I weighed myself, and when I got on the scale, it showed my weight and then this robotic voice said "You are overweight" I was so surprised that my scale was talking to me I thought I was going crazy. Not that I know I am not going crazy, I am pretty mad at my scale. As if the numbers you display don't let me know I am overweight enough without you announcing it??? Crazy scale!

Hi everyone, lots of talking going on as usual--nice to be with you girls! Hubby and I went for an hour hike--it was nice to have a change in the exercise routine. I feel good now after eating a big spinach salad--not much planned tonight--just chillin in the apartment---Ya, I guess it must be a woman thing to be so mean about weight--but it sucks---it really does--I guess we are always looking at the woman next to us and judging each other--I think that sometimes that we don't mean to but it just happens? Not sure--wish it were different. I know one thing that has helped my self-esteem and confidence and it is working out--I've never felt more confident in my life---It feels good to do cardio, lift weights ---I feel strong, powerful--I would promote exercise to anyone that has low-self esteem or low confidence--that's just my opinion anyways---it's really helped me in my life. As for the sizes in pants, I"m not really sure-I think it's really different for everyone--and since I am getting more leaner since I lift weights I have noticed that my pant sizes are changing even though the scale doesn't move (does that make sense) so I can't help out much in that department. Thanks everyone for giving advice--I try to block my mom out when I can and I will learn how to shut her down one of these days--shouldn't talk about your daughters weight--I will show her! huump..Great stuff..I'm just hanging out tonight.

Original Post by ennazus520:

this morning I hit some button accidentally before I weighed myself, and when I got on the scale, it showed my weight and then this robotic voice said "You are overweight" 

your scale sucks!

Also from a guy I can almost understand a "fat comment" lets admit they don't always think with their heads, but for a women who is supposed to have some compassion its just hard to hear.

Honestly, I think it's because being fat is one of women's biggest fears... as sad as that is to say. I have no other problems with myself or my life other than the fact that I'm fat. And for me, it's the worst thing in the world.


And watchme-- I think every carries their weight differently so as for what size you'll be at a certain weight is going to be a mystery until you get their and you need to buy new pants. I was a size 18 from about 200-220, size 20 from 220-245 and size 22 from 245-265. And last time I was a size 15/16- I think that lasted from about 180-200.

And I think when you lose weight it's a lot different from when you gained weight (in terms of getting back into sizes).

thanks for the info guys.  i know it's different... especially for me cuz i carry more than 50% of my excess body weight in my mid-section, ugh!  suzanne, i don't carry as much weight in my legs but i basically look like a pregnant woman in a dress... everything OTHER than the tummy area looks good... (well, that's not true.  my upper arms also look horrible but i never wear sleevless or if i do, i wear a cardigan/shrug to cover my upper arms.)  i'm fitting into the cutest size 22 dresses now but they do NOT hide my tummy area despite fitting nicely and loosely.  it kinda sucks.  by the time spring really rolls around, i'd like to wear these dresses without my stomach protruding as much.  maybe if they are much looser that will happen.  i really want to wear cutesy dresses and flip flops soon.  sadly, chicago is getting another storm, whooooppppeeeeyyyy!

OO--nice topic--I can't wait until I can wear sleeveless shirts--I always avoid them because of my flabby arms but with all this strength training by summer time I should be able to! Also, I don't like to wear shorts, I wear capris---it would be so nice to be able to wear shorts (well of course I could wear shorts but with my thunder thighs it's just not a pretty thing so I spare myself the pain) I probably won't be able to wear shorts this summer but maybe by next? And I love love love flip flops but sometimes they hurt my feet--I guess they don't offer my feet enough support--I'm wondering if that's just my feet or is it because I'm so big? who knows? umph---summer time---(good stuff)

bootster, you probably need to be wearing flip flops with a thicker layer.  my friends (size 0 to plus size) all compain when they wear very thin flip flops.  but, if you get one that is at least an inch thick, you will probably find them to be much more comfortable. 

everyone, i weighed in at 268 and yet am not ridiculously happy like i should be.  i am happy b/c every time i enter a new "decade" of numbers i feel really good but right now, i'm up at 4:30 AM (woke up officially 30 mins ago cuz i was having trouble sleeping) and unable to get back to bed.  feeling restless, uneasy and stressed about my life situation.  also have an assignment due at work by noon which i haven't focused on because of the situation.  gonna turn to that now. 

talked to the guy last night and he is clearly talking to other people -- which i knew.  but hearing about them hurt.  it's funny b/c i think he purposely brings them up to make me jealous cuz he's frustrated about our not meeting.  cuz he'll still say subtle (or not so subtle things?) like you're one of the only people who gets me, you're one of the only girls i can talk to about real things, etc.  whatever.  but while we were talking he goes and messages another girl on facebook (ms. size 6) who he has just spent 20 minutes ranting about with me (and who he told our mutual friend created all this drama in his life and is not that smart or interesting and is superficial)  and who he is going to hang out with next weekend (at her cousin's engagement party) knowing full well that i would see that on his facebook wall.  he also told our common friend that he told his mom to tell that girl's mom he's not interested.  (she is an aggressive mother.  usually, the boys mother does the pursuing and contacting.) so what the hell is he doing now?  guys are such retards.

the job thing is what is really getting me down but having something going good in one aspect of my life would help.  added to which,  my sister called me up yet again crying at midnight to say that her husband is a jerk and they have nothing in common.  given that she herself rushed the marriage after 3 months instead of taking some more time to get to know this guy and meet other guys like my parents wanted, i'm not surprised.  all of our other friends took a good six months to a year or more (one took 3 years) and are EXTREMELY happy.  my sister, on the other hand, despite the fact that she is gorgeous, always felt ugly and was thrilled when this guy liked her and made false promises to her (like where they would live, etc.).  guess when everything else cannot be controlled, at least i should look at the control i have over my weight loss and be grateful.

Yay! We close at 12 pm today! Yay! It only happens once a year that we get out on a Friday before 6 pm, and I am going to enjoy it! I am going to go shopping instead of going home and cleaning or sitting around my house! Only problem is should I go to Wilkesbarre, where amongst the other stores I can go to Christmas tree shops and sunshine market? Or should i go to Allentown which is a little closer and I can return a pair of pants my husband didn't like to AJ Wright??? Decisions!

Bootster: Way to go on the hike. It makes sense that your pants are loosening without help from the scale because you are becoming more toned! Losing inches is still a good thing! I never ever wear shorts. Ever. I have terribly ugly fat legs! I would love to feel confident in shorts next summer! I wear flip flops all the time though. Once it gets to be warm enough, I am the flip flop queen! I want spring!

Dalmalama: I know my scale is sooo mean!

alibuch: I think if I were thin and rich, and still had my family and my husband, I would never have any complaints!

watchme: I usually wear my shirts pretty lose, and let me tell you, looser doesn't always mean you don't look pregnant! I once had a lady ask me when I was due...I said I am not because I am not pregnant. She said I shouldn't lie to her because she had eyes and she knows what pregnant looks like! Well, I felt insulted enough, so I actually said, "If you look closer, you will see that I am not pregnant, just fat." That shut her up! Oh, by the way, you should really show this guy what he is missing out on by bragging about other girls. Be EXTRA sweet and charming, and intelligent, show him every highlight you have. By the time he meets you he will spend his whole life regretting even talking to other girls! I hope your sister gets her romantic situation under control. It always sucks to see loved ones hurting.

Ok I have a confession to make. There has been all this talk about mean mothers on here, well it seems I have turned into a mean daughter lately. It all started because my mom and I have made a tradition out of getting together to go shopping on good friday. ...........

always a busy last half hour..... I will fill you in on my meanness later....sorry

Be jealous, ennazus... It's been about 60degrees here for two weeks. My flip flops have been brought out. I love it.

it's sunny and beautiful and NOT rainy today!  sposed to be really warm too, yay!

watchme: congrats on the small victory!! celebrate each pound!

suzanne: I can't wait to hear your "mean" story!

off to my massage, ladies!

Hello fellow beauties!  I feel fabulous right now!  I have squeaked under the 200 mark this morning (199.8)!  This is like deja vu for me, because my old (incorrect by 8 lbs.) scale gave me those readings a couple of weeks ago.  Well now I know I am accurately under 200!  Oh yeah, and guess what I'm doing on Easter Sunday!?!  Nothing typical; no dinners with friends or family, not even church (going Saturday night instead); nope, I'm going to DISNEYLAND!  How sweet is that!?!  I'll take my son and go along with my friend.  She got us tickets on ebay (my bday present).  I am also gearing up for Day 1 of Week 3 for my Couch to 5k.  I'm really anxious about this one, gals.  It seems drastically more difficult than the last running intervals I've been doing.  I really want to have success with it today.  Wish me luck, and I'll post my results after the workout.

Ali- I wish it wasn't true about losing weight and the sizes and weights we used to be.  I know that I'm not going to be fitting into any old clothes at the same weights as before.  That's something that I can live with though, because I'm getting healthier no matter how difficult it is going to be!  Right ladies!?!

Boots- Nice job on the 1 hour hike!  When I was heavier, my friend dragged me out hiking, and I felt like I needed to be pushed back to the car.  Now I know I'd be humming to myself the whole way!  I really need to plan in a good hike. :)  I totally agree that exercise builds self confidence.  I also shy away from the sleeveless styles.  They're definitely better than a couple months ago, but I still think I look better in sleeves.  My goal is to get into a pair of shorts this summer.  It's been a while since I've worn a pair.  I agree about the thickness of the flip flop base aiding to comfort.

watchme-  The specs of your man definitely pass by me!  I think your chart for weight/size is pretty good idea, though I agree with the rest that each person is going to fit thigs differently.  Way to go on the new "decade!"  That's like a solid month's worth of determination!  You are such an inspiration, and I'm so glad we're doing this together.  I'm praying that all of those stressors in your life will become much more managable SOON!  All I can say is, just have faith with the guy situation.  Whatever is supposed to happen is going to, just don't give up hope yet.

Suzanne- That was impressive, having only one bite of a cupcake!  Even more difficult was that your hubby gave it to you!  If my son tries to share a treat with me, I feel obligated to eat all of what he offers.  What a crazy scale you own!  Please don't say those things about any part of your body.  Focus on the fact that your legs are STRONG!  You're beautiful regardless, and I am confident that your entire body is going to go through a transformation once you get to your goal, but love the body that you're in right now.  I'm sorry you had that rotten experience with the ignorant woman at the grocery store.  I've been fearful of that exact situation many times before, but thankfully it's not happened to me.  That's awesome that you have freedom this whole afternoon!  I hope you have a fantastic time shopping!  And don't worry, the flip flop season will be there soon for you!

pinkcobra & Ali- Soak up the sun today!  I used to feel bad about sitting outside and dozing by the community pool, but now I just look at it as a Vitamin D treatment!  BTW, pinkcobra, that massage sounds heavenly.

ooh, mladdy, i'm so jealous! 199.8?! doesn't it feel great to be 100-something pounds? so jealous! i haven't been  your weight since...1998. hey, funny! hopefully i'll see that number before the year ends. congrats, and have fun at the park!

ooo..Mean daughter topic--I could go way into that--I will keep it short and just say I gave my mom the silent treatment for 5 months during one part of my life--but she deserved it--I didn't take her calls or anything--but the thing that pissed me off the most was that I lived like 2 hours away and she should have come and talked with me but she didn't--mom and I have a tough relationship-- Not sure if it will ever get better---The thing that really bugs me now is she still treats me like a "child" when I don't need to be told what to do or not to do or I don't even need advice from her--I need her to listen--which I have told her but she doesn't--she sucks at listening--she's very overbearing---humph--not sure if it will ever change---I'm interested in hearing your mean story ennazus! Mldaddy congrats for being under 200--I might fall out and cry the day I see that number again--must feel soooo nice! Keep up the great work! You other girls keep up the great work too! I went and had my weight lifting session with my personal trainer--it was really hard--I just wanted to give up but I made it through--sometimes I find it's more of a mental challenge then anything--I just have to keep telling myself that I can do it! I also did a short intense cardio session....so I got 40 minutes of exercise in today which is good because I am close to my weekly goal of 6 hours of exercise--I just have to do 20 more minutes of exercise and then I'm good for the week--that's exciting since this is my first week of doing it and I didn't know if I could do it in the first place--I don't have much planned for the weekend either--We don't do Easter (hubby and I) so we will probably just chill at home as always. Alright, I'm out--check in with ya later!