I am so grateful that I have experieced obesity.

I am so grateful that i have experienced obesity.

I dont know if this is the right place to post this, or if im even supposed to post this, but im just really annoyed.

 i always see all kinds of forums from teenagers and grown women who are "desperate" and "depressed" because they are a size 6 instead of a size 2 or something like that. About 5 minutes ago i read a post from a woman who was almost 5'11 and trying to get to 135lbs by eating 1200 calories a day. She sounded so depressed about herself. All the people who repsonded to her post didnt seem to even be bothered by the fact that she seemed was trying to get underweight.  I also can barely find any support on the young calorie count page (im 20) because it is filled with 13 year olds talking about being dying to be 100 lbs and whatnot

 Im sorry, but as a person who was 212lbs in the 7th grade and 252lbs in 11th grade, I just cant take these people.

I truly believe that at some point your body is no longer the issue--its your brain. your mentality. your attitude. I have a lot of weight to lose and of course I want to be healthy, but I must say that I am SOOOOOOO grateful that I have experienced obesity. I will never be one of those PETTY girls that hates themselves at under 150lbs. I am so glad that I have learned the lessons that I have. Its like the saying goes: What doesnt kill you makes you stronger. Some of these skinny people just have no idea what it means to truly have BODY issues. They only have MENTAL issues.

(im guessing this post might offend people.  im not trying to lash out, but im just sad at the state of the world and how much people hate themselves for no reason.)

100% agrre, unfortunately i think many of the ppl here have some sort of disroder, eating, excercise, body dysmporphia...something.  ofcourse not everyone but many ppl here so i suppose just keep that in mind.

best of luck

ya.  it kind of makes me sad because in theory we are all supposed to support eachother.  but i just cant support some of the crap i see and hear.

I know sometimes it can be hard to listen to people who complain about struggles that you might not share.  The forums can be a wonderful place to get advice and information.  However, if you are looking for some extra support from people who share the same struggles as you, you might want to try some of our CC groups.  There are some good ones that are strictly for people who have certain amounts of weight to lose.

whatever you decide to do, good luck.

this may sound stupid to others, but I know what you mean. I am grateful that i spent part of my life growing up oveweight. I feel like I developed a view of the world that people who "fit in" just don't have. I am more empathetic than I would have otherwise been, especially to anyone who is "different". And I am really confident now that I have overcome my weight problems..I'm not as skinny as most girls, but I am happy!

It sort of makes sense... struggling and surviving makes you stronger.

Original Post by jessicasbc:

 I will never be one of those PETTY girls that hates themselves at under 150lbs. I am so glad that I have learned the lessons that I have. Its like the saying goes: What doesnt kill you makes you stronger. Some of these skinny people just have no idea what it means to truly have BODY issues. They only have MENTAL issues.

You don't know that. I've met several girls who lost 80+lbs and even at 130lbs still weren't happy. 

You think us who are overweight don't have "mental" issues? Most of us  have some sort of issue with food/our bodies/weight or we wouldn't be here.

I'm overweight but I think it's in poor taste to say they have mental issues because they're thin and want to be thinner... their problem isn't that much different. Both are hard to fix...

I'm gratful I was smart enough to realize enough WAS enought! I never was *that* big, but I was never a skinny minnie either. I remember being 72 kg (abt 160 lbs or so) in the 12th grade b4 my 18 th b-day. I got down to business and talked to my doctor and my the next summer i was down to abt 140 lbs...still not thin on 5'2" but way better.

Then I started Univ and was even more active. Managed to keep the loss for abt 2 yrs but then my grandfather got sick, i had to take care of 3 houses, then I started to work as well, my husband (boy friend at that time) moved in wt me and somehow I remember being 68 kg (below 160 lbs) in sept 2004 and then a wooping 170 lbs in Jan/Feb 2006.

The on March 1 , 2006 my husband told me to get married in 2006. I freaked out! I was a freelance writer at that time (now full time writer) and i was doing some articles abt healthy living and ended up on a certain site. joined (Apr 2006 ) and started to lose weight. by my wedding I was 136 lbs and normal weight. One year later I was down to 122-127 lbs! Now, i'm hovering around 128-130 lbs and hopefully by summer i'll get back down to 120-122 lbs

I'm so glad something has opened my mind. i was always happy but i was never as happy as I am now. And certainly not as fit!

Yes, I used to hate those twigs who were mad they were size 4...Now I'm size 4 and what do you know? I want to be a size 2!

The more i lose weight and get fit, the more I want to improve my body. it's like a drug: you know you can look better so you do your best to actually look better!

I never wanted to be too thin though. and totally DO NOT agree wt those ppl who are looking to get to an insanely low weight for their height though.

i dont think you're coming across as offensive, just slightly harsh but nothing wrong with speaking your mind. what you are feeling is actually part of the normal process & is actually healthy but dont let it get in the way of feeling or expressing compassion for those who have not found their way to being happy yet, be it 100lbs or 5lbs.

i can understand partly where you are coming from. if i was not an emotional eater i may have not found my way to such meaningful self discovery. when it does become a problem in my life from time to time, i know that im not taking care of myself in some ways, so i'd better start doing some soul searching. if it was not for my eating habits and being overweight, who knows where i would be. i was never really obese but i was overweight enough to have blood pressure problems.

as alibsam pointed out, i know a few overweight friends that have 'mental' issues over food & are therefore overweight. i have found that i really cannot separate my body from my mind, and when i try to that's when i actually get in trouble. i think they both can heal each other. anyway im babbling again.

and i know there are petty people out there, but i can't say really exactly who those are. many times what you are describing is a symptom. but as i said what you are feeling is healthy & normal process so that you can be happy with yourself no matter what weight.

unfortunately there's a lot of social pressure on women to aspire to a 'perfect' body - look at how celebs are ridiculed by the media if they gain weight or don't naturally conform to the Hollywood ideal.  I agree that we CAN choose to ignore those screwed up messages and be happy with who we are, but it's not always easy, especially for women who have low self esteem or lack positive influences in their lives.

I disagree that most people here have eating disorder types of problems.  It only seems that the undereaters and those with distorted body images and eating disorders are in the majority because they post more and cause more drama than those of us needing help with obesity.  Yes, we can feel compassion for them, but it's tragic and sad.

Most of those of us who are truely overweight or obese use the CC tools and avail ourselves of all the great information that CC gives us for free.  We use our journals and join groups to find the support we need.  I know I communicate through my journal more than on the forums.  We have a tight group of friends and we are in touch almost every day with each other through our journal entries. 

CLAIRE-congratulations on winning your battle with cancer, really, that is amazing and i wish you the best of luck in life, happiness+health!

Original Post by alibsam:

You don't know that. I've met several girls who lost 80+lbs and even at 130lbs still weren't happy. 

You think us who are overweight don't have "mental" issues? Most of us  have some sort of issue with food/our bodies/weight or we wouldn't be here.

I'm overweight but I think it's in poor taste to say they have mental issues because they're thin and want to be thinner... their problem isn't that much different. Both are hard to fix...

 What Im saying is that if you arent actually fat and your body isnt unhealthy and you still have issues with your body, then they are not issues with your body.  they are mental issues.  im not saying that anyone has a mental disease or something extreme like that, but we need to distinguish between actually having a physical issue and having an attitude issue.  i am obese.  i am at risk of heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressue, etc..  i am a size 20.  i cant wrap towels around me.  ive had experiences where seatbelts dont fit.  i have literally walked into entire shopping malls and not been able to find anything that fit me.  I have BODY issues.  Self esteem and confidence are not body issues.  They are mental issues (which i struggle with as well).  But they are mental issues that are not always solved by losing weight or making a physical change.  Sometimes people have low self esteem and no real physical issue.

And I do know that i wont be one of those girls.  You dont have to believe me, but you havent lived my life and you dont know how I think, so it doesnt matter anyways.   I dont think I am in poor taste for saying what i said.  I think its a reality that many people dont want to face.  Its much easier to work on a superficial problem than a deeper emotional problem.

Also, I want to clarify.  Im not trying to insult anyone for having "mental problems".  I have a lot of the mental issues that go along with obesity.  im just saying that the people who have the mental problem, but actually have healthy bodies, are not going to solve it by counting calories.  We need to seriously distinguish between someone who actually has a physical issue and someone who just has a mental distortion of themselves. 

None of us can predict the future, jessicabc. 

I have a goal weight set for myself. When I reach it, it doesn't necessarily mean I'll be happy with my body. The same goes for everyone here. Your self-esteem doesn't just automatically repair itself when you hit your goal weight. 

edit: double post

thats what im saying.  people use their goals weights as ways to repair the mental issue.  im saying that as an obese person i have spent a lifetime knowing better than be disgusted by a healthy body, even if its not the perfect body.  i cant predict the future and i get what your saying alibsam, but im just saying that when you've been obese for 20 years, you learn lessons and experience a perspective that people who have never severely overweight never will experience.  i feel grateful to have suffered through obesity because i think i will be more appreciative of my body when it is healthy.

Original Post by jessicasbc:

thats what im saying. people use their goals weights as ways to repair the mental issue. im saying that as an obese person i have spent a lifetime knowing better than be disgusted by a healthy body, even if its not the perfect body. i cant predict the future and i get what your saying alibsam, but im just saying that when you've been obese for 20 years, you learn lessons and experience a perspective that people who have never severely overweight never will experience. i feel grateful to have suffered through obesity because i think i will be more appreciative of my body when it is healthy.

i hope you are not waiting till then though, right?

not im not waiting.  ive lost about 28lbs and im stil 224lbs but i feel so awesome.  i can remember feeling so suffocated at 252lb. 

Original Post by jessicasbc:

not im not waiting. ive lost about 28lbs and im stil 224lbs but i feel so awesome. i can remember feeling so suffocated at 252lb.

thats good, keep it up. i try to even remember to appreciate my body when i do things like taking a bubble bath, without my body i could not appreciate it. & my last workout before i got sick this week, i felt really strong, i appreciated it then too.

Stop thinking that your body issues are superior to others.

It snobby.

Original Post by jessicasbc:

thats what im saying.  people use their goals weights as ways to repair the mental issue.  im saying that as an obese person i have spent a lifetime knowing better than be disgusted by a healthy body, even if its not the perfect body.  i cant predict the future and i get what your saying alibsam, but im just saying that when you've been obese for 20 years, you learn lessons and experience a perspective that people who have never severely overweight never will experience.  i feel grateful to have suffered through obesity because i think i will be more appreciative of my body when it is healthy.

I think the thing I find perplexing is that you assume that a thin body = a healthy body. But pray tell, what are some of these lessons and perspectives that those haven't been obese will never experience? I'm honestly interested because I can't really pin down the point of your thread. What you are saying reads as "a person who has never been obese will never appreciate a healthy body" and "if someone is thin then they are automatically healthy" - neither premise is true, so I think I must be missing the point somewhere.