Guess what

Yesterday I went to some of my friends and asked them to come tell a teacher with me about my problem. Half of them then procedded to say they wouldn't do it because I'm just going through a phase, while the other half said I was just doing it for attention and I needed to get over myself. That was a crushing blow.

darling thats horrible to hear..is there noone else you can got to for help? could you muster the courage to go and tell someone on your own?

make a doctors appointments maybe? i dont know youre story but youre taking positive steps by getting other people involved, the more people you tell the easier it will become to fight your problems

be brave x

The only way that this will turn into a crushing blow is if you let it. Don't let unsupportive friends weaken your motivation to get better. Go tell the teacher without them! From the sound of it they would be more trouble then support at this point. Be your own support! Stay strong!

Possibly take heed.....you have EDNOS yes, but you are acting as if you have a life-threatening illness so people are thinking you are attention seeking.

Zach, don't use this as an excuse not to talk to someone.  That you've been talking to your friends is a good thing, but they aren't knowledgeable enough about EDs to be more than practice for you.  You can do this one-on-one.  Your teacher already has an idea that something's wrong, so all it will take is confirming that.

Original Post by rastnim:

Possibly take heed.....you have EDNOS yes, but you are acting as if you have a life-threatening illness so people are thinking you are attention seeking.

 This could become a life-threatening illness. Your lack of compassion for ED's frightens me. I wonder if you've had friends you downplayed ED's to, that could have used support. This kind of thing is DEAD serious

zmarsh, you sound like a smart young man.  As a smart young man you have seen things about yourself that have concerned you, and you know that you need to consider getting help for those things now, before they become something worse.  That is an incredibly mature thing to do.  Because of that, I have confidence that you are equally mature enough to find the courage within yourself to do this with or without your friends' support.  Ultimately you are the person who is affected, not them, so don't let their reaction dictate whether or not you take care of you. 

No one else is as important as you are when it comes to your own health.  :)  Good luck - we're cheering for you from here!

(Edited because I typed before paying attention to a few necessary details.  :) )

Go to the teacher on your own. 

Erinlf, Rastnim does have a good point. His friends probably think that he's over reacting, not to mention ED's aren't taken seriously with males.

Zmarsh: I don't know what you want us to say so i'll just say what i think is best: Go to the teacher on your own. Get it over and done with it's far easier than you seem to think. Write a letter, send an email... all these things have been suggested numerous times. There is nothing left to suggest.

Erinlf, I am sick of ana wannabes. Yes EDs are very serious and I have been in hospital due to mine so I know. If anything that is why it annoys me more. This person is not near to being underweight yet, and yet is going around acting like they are going to die, no wonder his friends are getting pissed off. This is the type of person that gives EDs a bad name as only bein silly attention seekers who you don't need to take seriously. I have seen it time and again, there are those that actually have EDs and then there are those who think they do because they want one for the attention. So don't try and tell me about EDs being serious cos I bloody know.

Hi rastnim, I have a question.  And, it's not to be argumentative, because I completely appreciate the perspective you have.  But, I wonder what would be better: the OP not asking for help, or asking for it at the risk of seeming like he is overreacting?  Personally, I would rather he ask for the help and get help, than to see him afraid to ask for help for fear of seeming like a wannabe, and then have his situation worsen.  What if he decides not to ask for help because of his friends' reaction, and a few months from now he is so deep in the throes of disordered eating that he requires expensive treatment and years of therapy?

Why not fix something while it is more easily fixable?

Yes, I completely see your point, but I have had an ED for many years now and I have come to be able to spot which people are just doing things for attention. I just feel that this is case of just doing it for attention, I have never gone around trying to get people to help me and writing about it on diet forums. It just stinks too much of attention seeking. For someone of a bmi of well over 20 and going around acting like they need immediate medical attention and keep telling their friends who are obviously annoyed, they don't seem to be in much danger of dying. It just annoys me that they seem to think they need help so badly, EDNOS is usually ignored anyway, so it wouldn't do that much good. I see what you are getting at, as it would be better for someone to get help before the situation gets worse. But if someone is already and has been going on about "recovering" already it doesn't seem to me as serious a sityuation as the OP does. I totally see your point and it is a difficult one, but it is annoying when you have been very ill and suffered loads to have someone healthy going around going on about needing help because they are suffering SO much. They have NO idea is all I can say.

I'm not Rastnim but I do share many of the same frustrations regarding Zmarsh.

Zmarsh posts the same kinds of posts about the restricting etc, and asks for help. But when help is suggested, he finds reasons why all the help strategies cannot possibly work for him. Well true enough, if he doesn't try any of them, then nothing will work.

Rastnim also mentions having had an ED for years; I am the same position and have worked hard for recovery. I am completely sympathetic to Zmarsh if he will only take a positive step toward his own recovery. But so far that's not what he's been doing. So if he cannot be bothered to even take the smallest step toward recovery, then I find for my own sanity it's better I ignore his posts.

I have posted and will continue to post in recovery threads for people like Postivelinny and Eroth412 because they are doing the work to get better. If someone is working toward recovery, I'm right there with them cheering them on. Recovery is hard and it can be a truly sucky place at times.

I look at Zmarsh and it reminds me of the first time I got on a diving board--I was scared to death and didn't want to jump off that board. Well in the same way he's been on the diving board of confiding in his teacher for months now. Time to jump in.

Thank you, to both of you.  :)  I really appeciate the insight, it's helpful to be able to see how other people look at things.  :)

So, zmarsh, sounds like the ball is in your court.  Are you ready?  Because it sounds like you are, and it sounds like now is a great time to make a positive healthy decision for yourself.  Good luck with your decision!

I'm just going to say that everyone needs help for a variety of things at a variety of times in their life.  The ways in which we exhibit the need for help may be annoying for some and extremely concerning for others and the help that we ask for may not actually be the help that we really need.  It is up to us to keep asking for that help where and when we can and hopefully we won't end up like the little boy who cried wolf and not getting the help that we need when we really need it because it may appear that we didn't really need the help or were not willing to accept it earlier.