LOCKED TOPIC

Why do guys lie (For Guys)?

Okay, this is a question for the very small contingent of guys out there.

I've noticed on multiple posts that men will try to repsond by saying something to the effect, "Men like a little meat on your bones".  My hypothesis is that this comment could be a result of a handful of different thought processes and I'm trying to figure out which one.

1. Standard guy attempt to pick up said girl through compliment (insincere). 

2. Man X has been overweight, therefore has lower standards and thus is more accustomed to heavier women.

3. Truth, guy just digs heavier women.

4. Encouragement...probably insincere...but just trying to be encouraging in their weight loss efforts.

5. Other...I had one more but forgot what it was...

See, I just don't see it.  I understand to each their own...but everytime I hear a guy say that, it makes me immediately think they are either lieing or have low standards.  Because to be totally honest...I've never met a guy that would take Rosanne Barr (minus the personality) over a swimsuit model.  I mean, okay, if you're debating between a runway model and a size 8 woman...maybe you guy size 8 because a girl that is "too" skinny is kind've gross...but when guys say things like "Paris Hilton is too skinny...I'd rather have a plus size woman any day!"  What!  That's rediculous!  Knowing guys, it makes me think that the same exact guy is on an eating disorder website posting that Ally McBeal is too fat.

I mean, I understand choice 1, 2 and even 4...but choice 3 is called a "fetish"...not a preference in my opinion.  And 2 quick rules...

1. This is meant to be an honest discussion, it is not meant to offend, and please don't respond with the Oprah/Tyra/Ellen answer of "loving people for their inner beauty...because I ate a pear today that isn't sitting well and I don't want it to come up.  Will some women find this topic offensive?  I haven't met a group of women where at least one didn't find something offensive so probably yes.  And I'm sure at least one guy will as well to try to impress said woman from aforementioned group.  I didn't post this in the "motivation and support" forum...just in the lounge...fun discussion...if it raises your blood pressure...there are thousands of posts about bunnies, and flowers, and Martha's new recipe for Almond pie that you can post at...just hit the back button once and breathe.

2. The answer, "I like bigger women because they are more willing to do "X, Y and Z"...to me that's a horrible answer because that's nothing more than preying on low self esteem.  I understand a swimsuit model would probably have higher expectations and be "high maintenance", but meeting higher expectations isn't necessarily a bad thing.

your original assmuption that there are only two choices for most men -  either Rosanne Barr or Paris Hilton is flawed.

and making the assertion that all men are lying or have ulterior motives for being with heavy women is also flawed.

when you can come up with any relative proof of your position, bring it.

until then perhaps a nice bottle of STFU juice, might quench your thirst for debate.

Original Post by caloricat:

Original Post by cricketro05:

and i meant the shallow part abt Paris Hilton lol seriously, i doubt there's ANY guy who wouldn't fancy at least looking at Paris lol

 I'll put it to you this way;

Paris Hilton has no perceivable talent nor anything to offer society...yet cameras follow her everywhere she goes!  And when one asks "why"...the response is often, well, she's heir to this or that.  Do you know how many ugly or obese rich women there are out there...who probably have actual talent and a real personality?  A lot.

I'm not saying it's right...just saying it's reality.  To pretend that men think she's ugly and needs to eat a sandwich before we'd touch her with a 10 foot pole is just a lie. 

Think of the Bachelor (popular chick show)...when was the last time the Bachelor featured plus size women?  The producers would never let that happen for a couple different reasons....but I digress.

 *referring to statement in bold*

And to pretend that ALL men think she's attractive is a lie as well.

Why cal cat you hardly fit the male version of your own visual drivel now do you?

I don't think this has spiralled anywhere unfortunately for you not many men have joined in or perhaps I have missed them.

goes to check.

^^kathy yup second that.

ok PAL, don't talk down to me like i'm some kind of idiot. i'm not in a "tizzy".

you asked andie a question, and i pointed out what the most probable answer to that question is. sorry you can't believe that not all men would jump for joy because their girlfriend lost weight or complain if their girlfriend's weight changed. 

for one,  i don't go to "clubs". two if i were out at a bar or in a social situation, and met a group of guys, i'd choose the one who was confident, made me laugh and was fun to be around, whether he was the chubby one or the scrawny one or the well dressed adonis.

as for the cologne thing? uh...yeah...not sure what to say about that, so i'll just laugh.   

Original Post by purespark:

Let's not make this spiral downward?  Really?  Says the person who claimed that he hasn't "met a group of women where at least one didn't find something offensive."  Why, as women, we're naturally irrational, so of course Jules missed something, right?

Actually, no, she didn't.  Did you read post # 55?  How do your statements in any way address her question?

 Both posts 50 and 52 by Jules were about the same thing, whether or not it's possible that a person could like someone for their personality, not just their looks, unless I read it incorrectly or she's referrring to a different post.

My response was that obviously looks are only 1 part of a very involved and individual decision. 

If I didn't answer the question or I missed it, I apologize, please ask it again.

it's called Sex Panther, by Odeon.  60% of the time it works, every time.

^ha!

I'm sorry, caloricat, I missed that you were addressing personality as it factors into relationship decisions because I misinterpreted your pronouns.

Ma hau hau hau ha ah nice ^5  sparky

hee hee well played ladies. :)

can't help but wonder why only one guy has joined in and even he got out early on?

haaahahaha

Original Post by kathygator:

your original assmuption that there are only two choices for most men -  either Rosanne Barr or Paris Hilton is flawed.

and making the assertion that all men are lying or have ulterior motives for being with heavy women is also flawed.

when you can come up with any relative proof of your position, bring it.

until then perhaps a nice bottle of STFU juice, might quench your thirst for debate.

 I gave multiple societal examples to make my point.

"STFU juice"?  Really?  I thought you were supposed to be the level-headed classy one of the bunch?  You say "bring it on" then tel me "STFU"?  Class.

I have experienced that Guys lying for other guys and beyond..... haha

I was pregnant with my first child and was still with his father at that point. We were living with my best friend and her boyfriend which happened to be best friends with my sons father. Well while I was at work he was supposed to be looking for a job, but wasn't doing that and had been cheating on me for a long time. Not only did his friend lie for him (and the funny part is I paid ALL the bills to this place)  ...he had my best friend lie for him too because he told her he'd break up with her or whatever if she told me.

GUYS!!!  Boooooooooooo  I have two boys now and so I am trying to raise them not to be such bootie heads..haha

#65 jules well put.

"tizzy indeed"!!

well andie, i like to think it's because the guys on this board respect women and think with the larger of their two heads.

Original Post by andie-joe:

can't help but wonder why only one guy has joined in and even he got out early on?

 Yup...I think the guys that managed to pop in probably saw the carcas getting ripped apart and thought the better of joining in.  I don't blame them...the claws have certainly come out!

Any way we can get back on topic?

Okay.  Back on topic.

I also have an issue with the following statement:  I understand a swimsuit model would probably have higher expectations and be "high maintenance", but meeting higher expectations isn't necessarily a bad thing.

So a heavy woman has no expectation of being treated well by a partner?  Just how callous are you?

ohh yeah, ROWR the claws are out!

*gets into a tizzy*

*shrieks*

*starts a pillow fight*

:/

yeah, lets get back on topic. carry on making your sex sound like a bunch of pigs.