A hard post - alcohol dependency

I'm 27 years old and a alcoholic.  I don't drink everyday and I am not one of those slobering drunks either...well not usually... but I have do had a dependency.  I quit once before for about 3 1/2 years and started up again when I went backpacking through Europe 2 years ago.  I thought I had control, but it looks like my bad habits have came back.  My main problem is I like to drink alone and when I do I usually over drink.  Social drinking isn't a problem as far as control, but I am a "all or nothing" type of person.  If I continue to drink in public I know the tempation is always inside me to drink alone.  I realize this site is generally for weightloss/calorie counting but I was wondering if anyone else is dealing with these sort of issue. 

I have a great girlfriend, but I've been hiding this from her almost 2 years...I feel so guilty.

chobe...my best advice is to seek counseling.  The guilty feelings will worsen as well the problem.  Perhaps try AA.  This is very serious and could get worse.  You know all that.  I'll keep you in prayer.

Hey,

I think I can speak for pretty much everyone on here when I say "we're here for you".

Admitting that you have an issue with alcohol is HUGE. Congrats on that. I haven't personally dealt with anything like this, but I have had friends who have overcome problems with substance abuse. It's hard, but it can be done.

Is going to AA something that you would consider? Or if the group setting isn't ideal for you, maybe a counsellor, or someone you can speak with one-on-one?

you are an impressive person to be able to open up and ask for help.  Personally I think you should be open with your girlfriend, if she is so wonderful, she will be by your side.  have you thought about going to any AA meetings?  I have not dealt with this myself so I dont know but I have had to deal with Family members in similar situations.  Find someone close to you to help you out.  Friends and family are there for a reason.

Best of luck and will keep you in my prayers.

Talk.  Talk to everyone in your life, your family, your friends, whomever.  Surround yourself with supportive people who will not put you in a tempting position while you're trying to make changes.  And most definitely do what neeners said....counselling.  We can change ourselves, but when we put the new "us" into the old "them" (friends/family that socialize with alcohol), it can be too tough of a test right at the beginning until you are stronger.  Don't underestimate your family & friends.....they've probably noticed something already, and will respect you for saying, "Hey, guys....I gotta do this.  NOW.  Are you with me?"

I've never had a problem with alcohol, but have witnessed the complete devastation of a loved one who destroyed his life because of it.  I would have done ANYTHING to have him ask me for help.  Get your people around you.

Take care.

Wow... you are very strong to be able to admit your weaknesses.  My dad had the same problem- except with cocaine.  He also had a weekly radio show.  Guess where he finally announced his problem?  His theory was that the pressure of the secret was helping maintain the habit.  do please tell someone in your life - or just try an AA meeting, they're anonymous, my boss goes to AA and he says you may need to "shop" meetings to find a group that you are comfortable with.  You don't even need top say anything, nobody should push you, but you'll get a better understanding of how not-alone you are.

Take care of yourself, above all.

you already have all of our support, see how easy it is to have support?  I agree, tell everyone or anyone!  Tell someone!  someone will be by your side.

I really shouldn't of posted this at work...you guys have me in tears, I am telling all my co-workers I have allergies. hehe.

it's not easy telling everyone.  Most people think your over reacting, especially cause I am still relatively young and I am not drinking strait from the bottle...

I have thought of AA, I would like to go but I think it's just too much commitment.  I wish there was a AA forum.  Erik! hook me up!..just kididng.

there have to be some somewhere online!  it cant be easy but my daughter has a friend at preschool, her dad is 27 and has been an alcholic for 6 years.  Age doesnt matter!  His wife left him, took the 3 kids with her. BUT, she is with her family and goes to AA meetings with him once a week.  She is there for him, not in the same house until she knows he is better.  You know you want help, his wife had to force him and it was Christmas eve.  Dont let it ruin your life.  You are young enough to get this under control before the rest of your life happens.  wouldnt you rather take it by the horns and win now instead of possibly losing your future? 

It cant be an easy thing but is there anyone that has ever questioned you about your drinking?  If so, call them.  They will help you.

I'm sure there's an AA forum.  Here's some stuff from my boss' group.  MUTE if you're looking at this at work, the guys were brave enough to record themselves making their statements, as well as posting them online.

http://www.loyolagroup.org/hosp/

There's some resources available there.  You can probably search AA in your local area, too.  You can go without making a commitment, just drop by a meeting and see if it's for you.  My dad's best friend says he went to one meeting a month for about a year before actually coming out and joining a group.  It's just getting a good look at the resource.  Nobody's going to make you give up your name or phoe number, you're not automatically enrolled in the "creepy drunk club" and it's a low-cost alternative to counselling.  ALSO your health insurance may help you pay for a counsellor, you should be able to call the insurance company directly and confidentially to find out if that's a benefit.

And good for you for realizing you have a problem BEFORE it destroys your life.   It's just like the people that say "hon, you're not fat" when you're not healthy, just because you aren't 500 pounds and grafted to your chair doesn't mean it isn't a problem.

http://www.vancouveraa.ca/

see if there is a meeting close to you.  Or just call them.

Thank you everyone for all your support.  I know this is a serious problem, I am surprised on how fast everyone reponded.  You ladies don't waste time!

My parents are pretty heavy drinkers...I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Then just tell them that you have decided to make some POSITIVE changes for yourself.  Proper eating &  health are ALSO good choices, so really, they go hand in hand, right? 

Stop.  Take a deep breath, and exhale.  And move forward.  A bit at a time, even.  You have displayed that you want better for yourself by posting on this site.  Let the support and people you have found here stand right behind you every single day as you move forward.  We're here if you falter, take a small step backwards, we'll stop you and help you continue on with your head high, and eyes wide open.

And we have some pretty deadly recipes, too.  *SMIRK*

both of my granddads were...none of their kids were or any of us grandkids, that I know of.  so thats a collection of 9 kids, 15 grandkids....you dont have to be another number!

we dont waste time on the important things in anyone's life!

Courage- thats all you need to take that first step!

This post was removed by the member because the developers of this website practice censorship.

I will definately try at least one AA meeting.  This has been something haunting me for a long time so it's nice to get it off my chest.  Again I really do appriecate everyones advice and comments.

Alcoholism is one of those things that effects us all, for the past 2 years I had it in my head that I could control it like everyone else but the fact is I can't.  I think I have a "addictive personality".  My parents are alcholics.  Other than their alcohol problem they are great parents , but it was still tough growing up with them.  I don't want my future kids/family dealing with the stuff I had to deal with.

   

good for you Paul! Remember we are all here- no matter what!  please keep us updated!  Alot of us have our personal emails on our profile, they are there for a reason!  If you need support, dont hesitate! 

is there someone that you can ask to go with you to the meeting?

very proud of you!  You are a nice looking young man, take care of your present and future.

Awesome for you to realise this on your own Paul!  You will make it.  Vow to be the one in your family that breaks the cycle - it starts with you - if you go to AA you will learn so much about yourself!  I had to make that choice one day - I was watching (and her I go aging myself) Donahue - and there was this character on that had hurt people through his addictions and behaviors and blamed it all on his childhood and his parents etc etc and he was in his thirties and it just hit me (I was in my early twenties - Before Children) and I just thought to myself, Good God, when does it stop being everyone elses fault and become your own?  Because at some point we have to take that responisbility - none of us are hopeless or helpless!! I am so happy for you that you have such pride in yourself that you take the steps you need to better yourself physically and spiritually - all the support in the world  and all the time in the world for a special person like yourself!!  I have quoted this before but Montel used to be a motivations speaker before a talk show host and his mantra was "Mountain, get out of my way!"  I adopted it for my own and it really helps!

I don't have a lot to add, but I just wanted to say how strong you are to admit you have a problem and to seek help.  That is not an easy breakthrough to make!  My encouragement and thoughts are with you as you take control over this part of your life.  

Hi sweety,
I come from a long line of alcoholism in my family as well.  When I was young I would binge drink a lot and tended to drink alone as well.  I realized as you are I was heading down a slippery slope.  Thankfully that recognition and some support gave me the help I needed to not let it spiral out of control. 

Your accountability speaks well for your ability to fight this and beat it.  Be proud of yourself for that, not guilty.  Hugs and love to you!

((((((HUGS))))))

Your a brave and strong person.  Congratulations on taking the first steps to freedom. :)  YOU ARE WORTHY!!!

T