Healthy Bowel Movements - ew did I just say that?

I have a question that I have tried to find the answer to online but to no avail.  When I started "dieting" - really eating right - my bowel movements changed.  I do not have one as frequently, they are smaller, stickier and darker - if that makes sense.

If I were to eat, say something like, a cheeseburger, it changes back for one time, but then reverts back.  I am eating plenty of fiber, oatmeal everyday for breakfast, apple a day, and so forth.

Sometimes I can go for 3-4 days without a BM.  I just need to know if that is healthy?  If it is not what can I do?  Do I take a stool softener?  I have looked into the whole colon cleanse thing but it looks like it could do more damage than good.  I don't want any more problems!

SW : 165

CW : 143

GW : 135

35 years young

5'8" tall

Medium to small build - still trying to figure that one out!

I have one son that is 8 years old.  I have been married for 11 years.  My current calorie burn, according to the site is 1690 and I average 1250 calories a day.  I work out some, mostly yoga - but usually only 1-2 times a week.  

I am very sexually active (which actually brings up another question - since I have been changing my lifestyle sex kind of hurts - the only thing I can attribute it to is when I shave the stubble hurts - I would love a suggestion for that one!) and I have a demanding job - both physically and mentally.

I would love any response to this I can get.  I would really love a doctor's opinion but my question was too long for the "ask" section.

do you drink enough water? cuz eating the right amount of fiber only works if you drink enough water to flush it out.  Do you have enough healthy fats/oils in your diet? They basically lubricate everything so it all comes out (i know eww). I ask that cuz you said you have an ok BM when you ate a cheeseburger, and I'm assuming that would be adding fat.

I probably do not drink enough water per se - I do drink a  lot of liquids - I am addicted to coke zero - I have tried to quit but it is really impossible for me!

I do consume healthy oils - EVOO is a part of almost every dinner I prepare.

I relly hat water and the non-taste it provides.  However, I do drink about 8-16 ounces a day during the week. (as I gulp my water that I left sitting there!)

I guess if it would help I could try and drink more water - do you think it would help?

i used to have the same problem until i actually reduced the amount of fiber that i ate. Once i focused on simply eating healthy and ignored fiber a little, then i started havig nice BM's

for example, i eat a lot of brown rice now (about 3 grams of fiber/serving) instead of 2 cups of raspberries (16 grams of fiber). now i am a happy camper.

and yes, make sure you drink plenty of water. if you're going to eat a really high fiber meal (like all bran or fiber one cereal) drink 1-2 cups of water first. trust me on this one, it will help enourmously.

If you don't like just plain water, you can try some herb tea also. 

The only thing that should concern you about dark, sticky BMs is potential for gastric bleeding.  GI bleeding can be "occult" meaning that it isn't readily visible in your stool.   When I hear "dark and sticky" that's immediately what I think of.   If you take high doses of anti-inflammatories, or have a history of ulcers, you might want to get it checked out if increasing water isn't helpful. 

As for transit time, or how frequently you have a BM, that is different for every individual.  I used to think I was super weird for not having a BM every day, but some people just have longer colonic transit.  Anything longer than 4 days would probably be a concern, however.