HELP!!! What do you say to people who don't want you to lose weight?

Even though I have just started losing weight, I notice resistance at work from the other women.  They seem to be angry that I don't want a big piece of cookie bar or I don't want a candy bar that they have brought to me.  The women I work with take it as a sign that I don't want to be a part of the crowd.

 Also, even though my boyfriend is supportive, other relatives who visit aren't supportive.  I hear things like, "Oh, just this one meal isn't going to hurt you." That really irritates me! Who wants to gain a pound just to please someone?

Do you seasoned dieters have any suggestions? I want to be polite but firm, how do you handle things like this?

Michelled

Joking about it always works for me.

When they say, "Oh, this one meal won't hurt you..." say, "Yeah, that's what I said to myself every meal for the past so and so years!" and laugh, cuz you're just teasing them, and also teasing yourself.

And when people offer you food, be truly apologetic. I'm a vegetarian so I deal with that all the time...I knwo they're trying to be nice and I'm turning that down, so I say, "Oh my gosh, thank you so much! But I'm trying to drop a few pounds so I can't take it...I'm so sorry, I know you're trying to be nice!"

Sometimes just saying the blatant truth is the best way to go. And the people that have a hard time understanding your situation...you won't be able to please them anyways, so what's the point in trying?

"Your one meal could clog my arties, and I would think you'd be grateful to pick me up off the floor after I pass out if I were ten pounds lighter!"

I know what you are saying, my husband is very supportive but my best friend has been very upset with my weight loss.  Instead of saying you look good or congratulations on your weight loss... she says how much more are you going to lose.  And she gets upset that I order healthy choices when we go out to eat.  My parents are saying things like I am anorexic and too skinny.  But I weigh 143 pounds and eat three meals a day plus snacks... I just most of the time eat healthy.  I don't get it.

Thanks for the ideas! Much appreciated!

“No thanks maybe later” is my favorite. By the time later rolls around they forget they offered it to you.

Ah, yes the "food pushers" as we like to call them at weight watchers.

Some good responses may be.  "Thank you but my dr. has me on a strict diet, although I would love to dive into that chocolate bar, i should stick to my yogurt (bring an extra too and say would you like to join me?)"

"Man, that looks so good but lately my allergies have really been acting up so i better just stick to my apple, but you go ahead and enjoy." 

When you know they may have a cake, gathering, whatever, junk food fest at work, bring in a fruit platter, or veggie platter. 

Hope it gets better.  You have full control over what you choose to put in your body.  If you only want it to be nutritious foods, then good for you.  Also listen to your body if you would like a treat now and then, moderation is the key.  Sometimes if you restrict/deprive yourself too much it can set some people up for an unhealthy binge.

Happy New Year, sounds like you already have a fresh start.

Take care!

 

I stick with this, "No thanks." You don't have to give excuses for turning down food. I find that a lot of people want you to eat so that they feel better about eating. My girlfriend hates the fact that I count calories. She asked me not to talk about calories. I thought that if I told her how bad a food is then she would be more hesitant to eat it. This didn't work. She would just get mad and tell me that I ruined her meal. So I don't say anything anymore. So I've learned that saying you don't want to eat something because it's fatty or unhealthy or your on a diet is somewhat insulting and making other people feel guilty. So politely say no.

AAAARRRGHHHHH i know exactly what you mean!! and you too chattynoel!!!!

my mother freaking drives me NUTS with that "this one thing wont hurt you" garbage! i just ignore her. you obviously have more manners than i do. when people offer me stuff i dont want, i just simply but politely say "no thanks". personally i feel like it is sort of rude of them to get upset with you about it. for example, i started at a new school this year and this girl jen i was becoming friends with had jolly ranchers. she popped one in her mouth them took another out and said "want one?" i thought about it, but then said "no thanks" she said "ugh, its not going to make you FAT! just have it!" excuse her! im well aware that one jolly rancher will not make me fat, but its bad for my teeth and blood sugar! in her case, i think she is concerned about my weight and eating habits and just tries to make me less uptight about it...

are you sure you NEED to lose weight? whatever, it doesnt even matter, really. people have a hard time minding their own business. tell those work girls "no thanks" with a smile. if they say something or get offended, say "im sorry im just not hungry/would rather eat something more nutritious/dont like that/can't afford to eat that right now" its none of their freakin business whether you're on a diet and frankly you dont NEED to give them a reason for saying no! grrrrrr i cant stand some pople! 

I would validate them for thinking of you and let them know that youve changed your eating for your health.

My teen was this way (Its just one bite) but eventually she tired.

I don't even mention that I'm trying to lose weight, I just say no thanks, and if they press me or give me strange looks I mention a health issue. People seem to be a bit more understanding/accommodating if they think you're eating healthy for a medical condition rather than a desire to be healthy and fit. Like Tommy said, I think people tend to feel guilty when you're doing something that they feel they should be doing but don't. I have relatives that don't want to hear anything about eating healthy just for the sake it, and even though they don't listen to their own doctor's advice they respect my decision to eat healthier when I tell them I'm trying to lower my cholesterol.

Why is so difficult to say No thanks!!! I just ate something or Im full or I dont't feel great..... Why let this people know that you are dieting???? mmmmmm if im going to a restaurant and want to eat a salad, is because I feel like it, those people that look at you funny or get upset because you are refuse to eat like them are not you friends, or they just dont want to best for you.....

who cares about what they think, they are not you family or close friends...

there are alot of good answers here already, but i guess i'd just say "no thanks, i already ate" & tell them how tempting it is & that "maybe next time" you will eat it  :D

good luck & happy new year!

NOBODY has the right to insist that you eat ANYTHING.  That should be DAMN CLEAR.  You have every right to refuse to eat, drink, or ingest any food, beverage or drug and you MUST realize this.  There's no reason to provide excuses.  NO MEANS NO!  Try to be polite at first.

I've learned to not tell the girls at work that I am going on a diet. Even though we all have our diet woes, it's almost like they turn against you when it's your turn. If they bring in something small, like cookies for all of us, it's pretty easy to avoid. If we have a "food day" where everyone brings in a dish, I being in something healthy for myself for lunch and a healthy dish for the day. They usually don't notice I have my own stuff :o)

Just keep smiling and saying no thank you.  Make an effort to take part in gatherings with family and coworkers even if you don't eat.  When I face a birthday at work, for example, I go to the gathering, sing the song and stay and chat, I just don't eat the cake.  When a coworker says something like "one piece won't hurt you", I laugh and say "I didn't lose 56 lbs by eating cake!"

Good point about not being able to please everyone!

I really like all of the responses that I have received! Thanks everyone!

"I can get in shape, or i can look like you, not a hard choice... right?"

Original Post by michelled67:

Even though I have just started losing weight, I notice resistance at work from the other women. They seem to be angry that I don't want a big piece of cookie bar or I don't want a candy bar that they have brought to me. The women I work with take it as a sign that I don't want to be a part of the crowd.

Also, even though my boyfriend is supportive, other relatives who visit aren't supportive. I hear things like, "Oh, just this one meal isn't going to hurt you." That really irritates me! Who wants to gain a pound just to please someone?

Do you seasoned dieters have any suggestions? I want to be polite but firm, how do you handle things like this?

Michelled

 I always respond with a smirk and a nice shake of the head and walk away. They usually tend to get the point to shut their mouth!

There are girls in my class who are really thin and snack all the time. When they learned that I was on a diet, they started bringing extra snacks for me! There are people like that who don't want you to lose weight, so watch out and resist them!