HELP . . .reaching out about alcohol

I think I may have a problem with alcohol.  Drinking wine is a huge issue for me.  I drink when I'm happy, bored, frustrated, sad . . . you name it.  I don't drink to get a buzz because I don't like that feeling but I do like the "ceremony" of drinking wine.  I also enjoy the taste.  I don't imbide in other alcohol but I know that doesn't mean anything.  I also know that my drinking is sabatoging my weight loss and motivation to work out. 

If I heard this from anyone, I'd definitely tell them that they need to seek help to "stop the madness"! 

I guess I'm seeking help from the people on this site

Thanks,

Judy

have you ever stopped on a temporary or trial basis to see how it feels?  i like my wine, too - not to mention my beer, and sometimes my whiskey.  but once in a while i quit for a few weeks, just because.  it always feels great, i lose weight, sleep better, have more energy for exercise, etc. 

if it's really just about the ritual for you, how about filling your glass with club soda instead? 

if you find that this is really difficult, then you might need to go a step further, but maybe it's just about breaking the pattern and shifting from a daily to a weekly ritual.

Thanks for the post.  I stopped for 10 yrs when I was married to a "recovering alcoholic" and didn't miss it a bit.  I also stopped for a week when I was on a "6-week body makeover".  I lost 5 lbs in a week but didn't stick to it.  I felt wonderful not drinking so, logically, I don't understand why I continue to do it.  I even avoid socializing because I'll be so tempted but that doesn't make a difference because I'll drink by myself.

huh.

judy, this might sound presumptuous, but...what are you not saying?  i think there's a piece here that you don't want to put out there (yet).  i know - once its in black and white, you can't ignore it.  but i think you want to say it.

Judy I think you definitely have a psycological dependence to alcohol. I too had a problem with alcohol I drank heavily for many years and my weight went up to 225 pounds. Im a 5' 5" male and 225 is not healthy. I quit drinking about 6 months ago, not too sure of the day. I was a huge binge drinker and last time I got alcohol poisoning was it. Anyways long story short in 6 months time I now weigh 145 pounds and have never felt better about myself or life. I personally would set a goal, put it in writing and aim for it. Weight loss shouldnt be your top priority, breaking your dependence on alcohol should.

I don't think you're an alcoholic, for what that's worth coming from a layman... I think you're a heavy social/home drinker.   There's a world of difference between an 'entrenched bad habit' and 'dependency'.  I've lived with an alcoholic as well and you don't strike me as having the same characteristics. 

My suggestion (as a former heavy social/home wine drinker and wine lover) is this.  Alternate 'wine weeks' with 'non-wine weeks'.   I'd also suggest you don't keep a stock of wine in the house.  Don't buy cases of 6.  Buy one bottle for your wine weeks and after it's gone, don't replace it until the next time.  If it's not there, it's a lot tougher to start...

By cutting down in this way I think you'd achieve several useful things...

1. You'd demonstrate to yourself that you can control how much you drink ...  Currently it sounds as though you don't really believe that.
2. You'd have to find other ways to relax and other rituals or 'ceremonies' to replace the nightly uncorking. 
3. You'd have to find other things to drink...  (I found ginger cordial or lime cordial made up with sparkling water was a good 'grown-up' soft drink to have with dinner)
4. Your weight-loss would be more encouraging... that could motivate you to drink less, even on your 'wine weeks'
5. You'd probably have more energy... and exercise would be more appealing
6. You'd give your body regular breaks from alcohol - which is vital for your health.  Continuous (even moderate) alcohol consumption is very harsh on the liver and the damage is cumulative
7. You would feel more positive in general.   After all, alcohol is a depressant.

Good luck

Hi all,

Thanks for all the input.  I don't know if I'm an alcoholic or not.  I know I have to have a mindset to stop tho.  I drank my last bottle last night.  I only have red in the house and that is not a temptation to me.  I will stop, one day at a time.  Pls stay with me on this and I will be accountable to you all and I will also be honest with my progress.

Again, thank you for your continued support.

Judy

Good morning,

Well, I had just one glass of wine yesterday.  You know, I didn't have a desire to pour another glass nor did it taste that good.  Perhaps the Lord is taking away the desire or handing me the willpower to do it myself.  I was 354 calories over my desired amt but it was all healthy . . . does that count?  Still not much motivation to exercise.  Any hints from you all?

Thanks,

Judy

way to go, judy ;)

i think you'll find it easier to exercise on those days when you had none the night before.  i know for me, it doesn't take much alcohol at all (one or two drinks) to take away all motivation for exercise and other "optional" activities. 

also, i don't know if this fits for you, but a lot of people seem to have rigid ideas about what constitutes "exercise."  it doesn't have to happen in a gym, you know?  yard work, a walk in the country, painting the bathroom - it all counts.  and on those days when i have to convince myself to ge out, i'll tell myself that i'm just going for a short walk (i have a dog, so no walk isn't really an option).  once i get outside, it's easy to turn that short walk into a 60 or 90 minute hike.

i wouldn't worry too much about calories if i were you.  one thing at a time.

i'll tell you one other thing; a couple of years ago, i decided to quit alcohol for four weeks.  it was partly to lose weight, partly to see what it felt like, and i liked the rehab-y ring of 28 days (i'm a bit perverse that way).  at the end of my four weeks, i didn't want to start again; i ended up doing a total of seven.  i felt amazing.  of course, i'd recently moved and had no social life, so....

Thanks, pgeorgian.  I don't have much of a social life either and my work is really slow.  I do walk my dog twice a day and yesterday I was on my sister & bro-in-laws construction site for 3 hrs doing my "design" thing.  I already walked Nelson this am and now doing laundry.  My condo is also on the 3rd floor so I never take the elevator but always the stairs.  Somehow, I don't look at those things but perhaps I should.

Well, I overdid the calories yesterday and drank wine.  My friend came over and we watched a movie.  Lost my voice due to allergies so didn't talk much because I find it so exhausting when that happens.  It's been gone for 2 days . . . we'll see about today.  Nelson, my dog, and I walked about 80 min this am.  After what pgeorgian said yesterday I thought it would be good for both he and I.  My siatica is killing me as a result but hopefully Susan, trainer, can help me this am.  I don't feel like an alcoholic but is that denial?

i think the terms "alcoholic" and "addiction" are way overused.  most people cut back or quit when the consequences of their use outweigh the benefits.  for me, that happened when i realized i'd gained ~40 pounds over 12 years and was going to hit 200 before i turned 50 ;)

sounds like you're where i was about three years ago.  i think you're just getting ready to make the shift, but you're going to do it!

Thanks for the vote of confidence.  I think you're right!