Help! Relapsing!

Ugh!! I don't know what triggered it! I think it must have been the numbers on the scale, but I desperately want to get back down to 115. (Just fyi, I lost from about 140 to about 100 in a about 4 months, maintained for about a year, then gained from 108 to 125 in a month and I'm 5'7" and 16 yrs)

I just feel so fat and ugly!! Help me feel better!

Breathe!  Do yu see a counselor that helped you in recovery?  Call him/her as soon as you can.  Talk to a friend or family member.  Think about the fact that at 100-115 pounds you are killing yourself.

You aren't fat.  You're actually the perfect weight for your height - or could probably even stand to gain a few more!

Skin & bones = YUCK!

Curves = Oohlala

Seriously, guys want curves - boobs, butt, hips!  They don't want a skeleton.

125 at 5'7

 

That sounds beautiful, what are you tripping out about?

 

i know what you mean, the scale gets me every time. i think innocently enough to go check the scale in the morning (or do without thinking) and just stare in horror at what it says. i am 5'2 and i gained 30 lbs in 6 weeks at the start of recovery. about 10 was water weight (edema) so that fell away recently. still, 20 lbs extra on a short girl with a tiny frame seems so much, especially looking in the mirror trying to recover from an ED..

sometimes i look in the mirror/scale and just want to go back to being too thin. its scary now and tough. but i am slowly realizing i do look better now, and i have more energy. i can living my life and my poor husband doesnt have to watch me waste away-or family, friends.

i agree with j_sand, 5'7" and 125 sounds like a great weight. i know from the inside its scary. you were a lot thinner and this is so different now. i bet you are a lot more attractive in a feminine way now :) smile girl...its so hard but were all here to support each other. we can do this. its no way to live hiding behind an ED. we all have so much to offer the world, lets get out there and kick this ED in the butt :)

Thanks for all the good advice. Although I still feel like a cow, I think I can fight it off eventually, it will just take time.

When I was 125 at 5'7 I looked/felt hot (well, most the time!)! I was healthy, had lean muscle, and was definitely not considered a "cow". I'm sure you are beautiful at 125! Bones aren't sexy and besides, 125 is on the lower end of "normal" for your height. I've been getting scared with weight gain too but people keep telling me how much better I look, and I'm sure you're getting the same. You've done so well on your recovery so far and are an inspiration to people like me just starting out! Keep it up!

Take a look at yourself in the mirror, but really look!  Whenever I do this, if I try really hard, I can see eventually what I really look like.  Sometimes looking at pictures helps too.  You are not fat, you are perfect!  I wish I could go back in time and stop at that weight, maybe even 130.  Now I look gross at 112 right now and I want to be able to gain up to around 125 without blowing up!  I envy where you are right now, don't relapse!  115 is not a healthy goal for our height!  I'm around there and I still look gross and boney!  Bones are not cool!

Get your hands on a sledge hammer as soon as possible and smash your scale to pieces. Or just get rid of it.

Seriously, the scale is a major trigger for many. Do whatever you can to stay away from weighing yourself.

I'll definetly ask my parents to get rid of the scale. I still had somebody tell me I looked 'anorexic' today and it made me feel bad. I don't know why.

Seriously, 125lbs at 5'7" is perfect.  Please, if you wish to lose more, go see a nutrutionist or even talk to your health teacher at school!

 

I have trouble with that solution though. I was never diagnosed with an ED, but I showed anorexic behavior that I recognized, but hid from everyone else. I decided that I need to recover, and it has been going well until like, two days ago.

So, I don't want to tell my parents or anyone about my food issues now that I'm recovering. Plus, 115 is where my doctor said I could be at my last visit (my mom took me in because I was so thin--103)