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Hi everyone, I'm just getting started on this site so figured I'd introduce myself somewhere where it's more likely people will understand me.
I'm 19, live in London, have been anorexic/EDNOS since I was 13. I reached my low weight of 82 pounds this time last year, and have since been in intensive therapy and currently weigh 120 pounds. I'm five foot seven.
Anyway, I'm on this site because although the idea of recovery is great, whenever I have to stop thinking about it and take action I get terrified. I feel so so fat at the moment even though I know I'm not and still have a huge amount of guilt about eating.
I'd like to try and find out what others here are doing to keep themselves focused on their health and to stop food ruling their life.
My goal is to lose weight, because currently I hate my body, but once I'm around 98 pounds I just want to stop and maintain. No more spiralling out of control and ending up in hospital.
Obviously I'm nowhere near recovered yet, but I would really like to hear from people who have.
I'm currently recovering.
Your goal weight of 98 pounds at 5' 7" is waaaaay dangerous to your health...please be careful, that will ruin your progress. Technically you're almost underweight for your height right now. Your body has changed alot and it needs time to adjust.
Gain muscle and tone your body if that's what it takes for you to feel comfortable in your body, but you do not need to lose weight. Your ED may be telling you that you're fat, but realistically you are just perfect!
"No more spiralling out of control and ending up in hospital."
If you know you're not mentally recovered yet, why try to get to an unhealthy weight? I'm afraid that will only lead to a relapse.
I hope that didn't sound too know-it-all-ish.
Also, welcome to CC :P I'm fairly new myself and just started posting this month, though I've been lurking the boards since May haha.
*Edit*
Lately when I get urges to restrict or can't stop obsessing, I do tasks that use my brain so I don't have room to think about it. Sewing projects, cleaning/organizing, or playing a strategy game are a few things that help me. Granted, they're not miracle fixers, but lessen my food stress immensely.
