I'm comfortable, but my parents think I'm too thin.

Recently I went from a muscular, what I felt was "chubby" 105 lbs, to a too thin 79 lbs with a well developed case of ana-athletic-what not.

When I started eating more I began to look healthier and feel so much better but I was still gaining weight too slowly so I started binging to try and put on weight quicker. Now I realize that was the wrong way to do it but anyways I'm getting off topic.

Right now I'm at a fuller 85-90 lbs. (I'm 14 years old and I'm 4'10") And im completley comfrotable. My arms are still thin but it's because of all the lean muscle mass I lost in them due to my disorder. I have some "pudge" but it's from trying to put on too much weight too quickly. I still havent gotten my period (it's been five months) but I've been getting cramps latley and I've been quite a bit bloated.

For a month and a half I've been over-eating probably anywhere from 200-1500 cals a day. I want to stop and maintain where I'm at but my mom still thinks that I'm "too skinny" and I dont know what to do. I dont want to keep over-eating and absolutley balloon, and I also don't know if she just thinks I'm too thin just because im not as "thick" as I was before.

I also dont want my body to get used to the over-eating to where I go from being underweight to obese. Right nwo im at a healthy weight. I feel fine, other than the bloating, and my parents think im too thin, but other people think i look great. Sorry for the rant but does anyone have any advice on what I should do? Thanks (:

Oh. And about my missed periods.....I know thats bad for my bones and such, does anyone have any advice on that topic too?

I'd say get back to 105. That's a perfectly healthy weight for you. Your periods will return and your bones and body will thank you. Your pictures look scary, especially the shot from above. I don't know who thinks you look "great", but maybe they are anorexic too?

You will not become obese. That's not the way these things work. Bodies don't get "used" to overeating or "make" anyone obese. Keep gaining weight until you are at your previously healthy weight, then maintain. I'm glad that you are no longer binging - keep gaining in a healthy way. You need that energy to grow - you don't want to stay at 4'10", right?

Trust your parents on this one. They don't want you to become obese any more than you do. They just want you healthy. Your current weight does not, in fact, look healthy. You look much older than you are, pinched, and frail. I'm not trying to be mean here, just telling you the truth in a blunt way so that you might realize that you cannot trust your perception yet.

HI Alkcollowen!  Welcome to CC!  :)

You are absolutely gorgeous!  From your pictures it looks like you would look great and healthy if you gained an extra 10-15lbs. 

Instead of binging though, try to add your calories through healthy eating and not junk.

Concentrate on eating calorie dense foods so that you do not have to eat as much to reach a high calorie count. 

You can do it and best of luck! 

trustwomen I appreciate your honesty. Really I do. But I wasnt comfortable at 105. I felt pudgy and low and I had suffered from Bulimia and binging. Those pictures were taken when I was around 80-82 lbs.

undertherainbow thank you (: I do want to gain weight but I want to do it healthfully. But, I have this mindset when I find a new food I like (or an "old food" that I had deprived myself of for so long) I'll eat like, 2X or 3X the amount a normal person would because I think "what the heck, Im supposed to be gaining anyways" and I know if i dont get out of this mindset I'm only setting myself up for future problems.

Another thing. I think I trieds to make too much of a dramatic increase too quickly. Most of the weight I gained went to my tummy and to my face (it's been a month and a half since my increased intake) and I feel terrible 24/7. Simple math would tell anyone that I should've put on more weight than I have, judging by how much I've been eating. And because of my "fat" gain it isn't doing me good mental-wise....it's slowed me down and my body is feeling it too. I just dont know what to do, im at a loss and right nwo im visiting my mom and I cant ask her what to do because her only response is "Your still too skinny. You need to eat more." And of course, what do I do. I eat more. Or I complain "Momm, I'm about to pop!"

Arggh.

gain some weight, hun. i saw your pictures.

you may not feel "good" at 105- but aren't anorexic & bulimic people like that? not feeling "great" with a good weight like that.

Maybe it would help if you prepackaged your food.  At least to start off with that way you give yourself an opportunity to relearn portion control especially on the foods that you have the hardest saying no to.  

If I am eating a "bad" food and I only want to eat 1 serving... I take out 1 serving and quickly put the rest away.  Out of sight... Out of mind.

You said the pics were outdated... Do you have any more recent pictures? 

What kinds of food were you eating when you gained the weight?  The types of food you consume make a big difference on your body's energy.  Maybe you can take in some extra calories through milkshakes or fruit smoothies that way you do not feel like you are always eating. 

I hope you find what works best for you to gain weight and do it in a healthy manner so that you are happy with the results. 

Yes I'll try and get some new pictures up in a minute.

The types of foods I was eating to gain were-

lots of turkey, lean meats, etc.

cereal. ohhh boy did I over do it on the cereal.

Peanut butter. Had a couple "fully loaded" sandwiches before bed a  time or two.

Protien shakes/bars. I'm actually in love with those slim fast optima bars. Ensure high protien shakes are really good too, but I don't want to get hooked on those.

Chocolate milk, one percent milk. Anything more I can't handle because im used to skim milk or none at all.

But I do admit I've over done it on the sweet stuff. Ice cream,cookies, cereal bars, etc. But it's because of my stupid "well I can afford this" mindset.

Okay. time to go get pictures. Thanks guys (: I really wasnt expecting many responses.

Oh.&& most of the "bingeing" I've done was right before bed, so thats probably not the best way to do things.

I've just had no guidance in this. I started out good trying to gain weight and then I just started getting "out of control" when people would tell me just to eat more.

Dont get me wrong though. I enjoy eating healthy and putting good food into my body. I was never like that before, I never cared about what I put in my mouth, I ate what i wanted when I wanted it. I won't eat pasta or anything in creamy sauces that I dont know what is in it, so thats another thing that im having trouble convincing  my parents. Maybe adopting a healthier lifestyle I wont get back to how I was before, so I shouldn't force it-you know?

It sounds like you are eating pretty healthy (besides the sweets) but are you eating any vegetables or fruit. 

Late at night is always my worst and when I usually want to snack on sweets or other junks.  Try making yourself a healthy fruit smoothie or protein shake to curb your cravings but still adding calories to your diet.  :)

Also, make sure you are drinking plenty of water to keep your body hydrated. 

Alright. Pictures are up. My tummeh's a bit bloated from all of the over eating. Tehe.

Yes. I like the idea of a shake or a smoothie but the thing is I can't do that when im around my family. They're always like "if you just eat like a normal person you wouldn't have to worry about all of this."

My parents are divorced. I live with my dad. His "normal" is Pasta, Rice, Vegetables (he puts butter on them) and sometimes chicken. Very rarely we will make hot dogs or macaroni and cheese or baked fish. He also makes a mad good homemade pizza.

Right now im visiting my Mom. Her "normal" is steaks and calorie-dense foods like chips and macaroni salads which im honeslty scared to death of. She has a chocolate weakness too which I've been helping her with latley (another "might as well do it while I can afford it deal")

Neither of them are overweight but they're not very active either. My dad is actually quite scrawny for a guy in my opinion but it's probably because he doesnt do much (night job...sleeps during the day) and protien isnt really his friend. Lol.

My mom is short, like me 4'10" but she's got some extra baggage from sitting still so much and from, I hate to say it, drinking. But no way is she over 100 pounds.

And now when I'm trying to slow down my weight gain and trying to eat better I always get the critism and stuff like "you're still too thin to be worrying about it" and it's like "worrying about what?!So what if I want to eat healthy/healthier than you. Big deal. I'm eating, right? That's all you have to worry about. For goodness sakes."

Im ranting again. Sorry. Pics are up. Thanks guys (:

And another thing. Becuase most of my weight gain has been fat it makes it so hard to increase my calories because I really want to lose it again and then re-gain it the right way as muscle. But I don't want to go back to my old habits of not eating enough and excercising. Bleh. I put my body through hell and now im putting it through even more by not doing this correctly. Why Do I always mess things up. Gahh.

i suggest eating plenty & plenty of fruits & veggies. whole grains, salads, meats. then do more weight lifting than cardio to build some muscle!

alkcollowen-  Are you currently under a doctor's care?  You said that your fast weightloss was exercise induced (ana-athletic)... Has your doctor given you the ok to workout again or lightly work out? 

I can understand your concern with eating healthy and that's great.  Just make sure you are taking in enough calories for your age/weight. Your calories should range between 1490 (no activity) - 2480 (heavy activity) depending on your activity level.  Check out the Kids Nutrition website, there is some great information on there.  There is a BMI calculator that explains the calories you need throughout the day, a healthy eating calculator, an energy calculator, and so much more.

Have you tried explaining to your mother that you are wanting to gain weight but that you want to do it in a healthy fashion?  If you haven't already seen a nutritionalist, maybe if you and your mother visited one they could explain the importance of gaining weight in a healthy fashion and not on sweets or junk. 

I need to post a friendly reminder here. 

Calorie-Count.com's mission is to promote healthy and sustainable weight management. This is not an eating disorder management site.  Our posting guidelines forbid the promotion of eating disorders and unhealthy habits.

We will not encourage you to maintain an unhealthy weight.  We can provide you with support to reach your healthy weight goal.  You have received some good advice from caring members, and I hope you'll heed it.

clairelaine
volunteer moderator

In reply to your comment about putting weight on your face and stomach.  I think this is normal.  You need to stay at the same weight for a while in order to let it all distribute.  If you're eating more all of a sudden then i'd expect ur stomach to bloat, it doesn't mean your tummy now has a ton more fat.  I'm also trying the weight gain thing and I can totally relate to you.  I'm 5 foot 8, and have gone from 110 to 119.  At the start my tummy seemed massive esp. given my relatively small arms and legs.  It seems to be getting flatter these days even if I weigh more, so I guess that's a plus.  I think the best thing is to gain the weight first and then you can think about toning.  It's weird feeling flabby and yet being underweight but i guess it's just the lack of muscle tone.  I still have days where I can't help but feel like I've failed (b/c I have gained weight) but then I have to remind myself that it was a conscious choice on my part to fight this ED.  Good luck to you on your path to health x

I'm sorry?  Where do you see even an ounce of fat on that picture?  I see an extremely thin child who looks undernourished and ill.

Okay. Thank you guys. I guess I'm just getting paranoid about everything. I'm going to eat normal though for a couple days to give my body (and tummy) a break. I appreciate everyone's honesty, brutal or not. (:

undertherainbow- in response to your previous post: I work out no matter what, it's pretty much unintentional. It's really because I have to bike or walk no matter where I go (means of transportation). Plus I've been doing a bit more latley because I'm back to hanging out with some of my friends, and we usually keep active to stay occupied. I really just cant sit still. I feel miserable if I do, especially when I'm eating so much. But I feel my body's stronger now than it was before (clearly) and I can handle it. I'm working on "listening to it" so I can know when im pushing too hard.

food freak- how long were you maintaining before your weight redistributed?

There is absolutely nothing "pugdy" about you!

At your new weight (the new photos you put up) you much healthier than the before shots at the lower weight where (like Claire said) you look sickly and malnourished and much older/more haggard than your mere 14 years. 

You are still a girl - not even a young woman yet - so your weight is not necessarily going to look the same as someone even 4 years older than you are. You could easily gain 10 lbs more and still look very thin (you have a lot of muscle mass which will do you well even with more pounds).

You seem like an intelligent girl who wants to be healthy ultimately so I would work in close contact with your parents (and doctors/nutritionists if you have them) to achieve a healthy weight everyone can be happy with.

You are absolutely gorgeous and are bound to be a knockout when you get older. Take care of yourself, gain a few pounds and you will turn into a stunning woman. You are nearly there.

if you are scared just go by the facts:

"You are a 14 year old girl, 59.0 inches tall, with a current weight of 90.0lbs.

Your Body Mass Index
Your current Body Mass Index (BMI) is 18.2.
BMI is a standardized ratio of weight to height, and is often used as a general indicator of health. The "normal" BMI for an adult woman of your height is 18.5 to 24.9. This translates to a healthy weight range of 92 to 123 lbs"

i didnt see your old pics. but here your look very small and lean.
you are right on the cusp for a healthy goal of the minimum of 92.
Go for it! talk to your mom and doctor about how this all scares you. but take care of your health. you are getting there. dont be scared. your body will thank you in the long run. but as you can see you can gain a lot and still be healthy. feeling/looking chubby to yourself can be a part of the disorder.talk to your doctor about that.

viactive makes a calcium chew for teens if you wanted to get some of those.