I'm done...can't take this anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've been obsessed with weight since I was 10 yrs old. I've been in ballet most of my life and had an OCD about weight the entire time.  At 12, I picked out and only ate the inside of an eggroll because I knew the wrap was bad...I WAS TWELVE!!!! Who cares about fried food at twelve?????

Always trying to stay under weight.

I'm DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 I have a brain. I'm smart, I'm funny and I'm fun. 

I've been depressed for 1 year cuz I'm 125lbs and not 105lbs. WTF???  What is wrong with me???? Am I that shallow??? Both of my parents are dying and underweight. And my goal is to be underweight???? Again...WTF???

one day I'll be old and saggy...hopefully, by that time, I'll have worked on my brain and not my body.

I'd say by realizing that you don't want end up like your parents, weight wise, shows that yes you are smart.  There's nothing wrong with you, we all just have a tendency to walk in our parents' foots step in life.  You're trying to find a healthier way of living and I hope you succede.

Good luck, you can do it.

That's great news! I have had lots of food guilt as well, and my mom always said " no food guilt for me" , the more she said it, the more I realized she was confident, the more I felt confident. So, parents defiantly affect the way you feel about yourself I think. I'm glad your stomping your foot on the ground, and declaring the end of the obsession!! When I stopped my ED, I felt like screaming "**** THIS **** ****!!"  now that I think about it, I probably did lol.

yay for us.

lol.. my words were censored.

I'm watching a movie right now called "this movie is not yet rated". Just funny that's all. I'm sure you probably figured it's supposed to be some more coarse than, "frig this friggin' poop" lol

lol, you effin rock.

What do you mean you are depressed because you weight 1251bs!!! I am confused, I am only 5ft 3in and weight 191lbs.  One day soon I would like to get down to your weight. I am obsessed to with loosing weight, but for me it is still stuck there.  I never had a problem or even thought about it when I was younger because I was always active. Weight was not an issue like it is now, I mean clothes have shrunken to what they used to be. Do not worry and get out of the depression state as fast as you can because that is not good either. Because if you are going to be and stay depressed than you will have a much bigger issue than just your weight.

I think everyone on here has been obsessed with weight in some shape or other.  I had bypass surgery 3 years ago when I weighed 308lbs.  I am since down to 174 but still very very obsessed with my weight.  Although I have shown weight loss significantly in each of my three years, my patience has been short in accepting that it still will come off slowly during the weeks and months.  None of us can judge you for your obsession, but we can be supportive and say sister I've been there done that...  Keep your mind clear and don't let yourself get depressed and you'll be OK... I wish you the best and know that you'll be alright...