I'm a teen having a hard time

Hi everyone.  I posted this same bulletin on support, but thought I might get more posters in this section.  I am 15, 5'4", and weigh 133 lbs.  I am always obsessing over how I look, how many calories I've eaten, and how I need to lose weight SOON.  People always tell me that I'm "thin" and such, but they must just be acting nice, b/c everytime I look in the mirror, I just see a fat girl, who compared to all others around me, is just gross.  I was hoping I could get some help, b/c I just want to be a normal teenager.  If anybody has any advice, I'm so desperate, please give me some.  I really appreciate the time you are taking to read this.  Thank you all.

You really need to sit down with your parents and explain to them that you are having some self image issues and that you need help to work through them.

Wow. I am EXACTLY like you. Im a teen and constantly worried about how i look. IT DRIVES ME NUTS.
I'm 135 lbs
5'3
and slightly overweight.(according to my BMI)
I am in the same problem... my friends say im average... but I know that i am a bit chubby.
Till a week ago, i had tried sooooooo many diets. They DIDNT WORK. Im hoping CC will work for me. good luck to the both of us!

if it makes you feel any better i'm an 18 year old girl, 5'4 and 228 lbs.  If I ever saw either of you at 135 lbs I wouldnt think you were fat.

I don't think you need to loose weight by the sounds of it. I think you just need to tone up your muscles and you'll feel a lot better about yourself and hey if you lose a pound or two along the way good for you! But don't obssess about this or let it control your life.

Hi werinasoad,

This site really isn't quite the right site for you. It's meant for adults and all the numbers in use are for adults, not growing teens like you. I suggest you ignore the numbers you get here (feel free to hang around for support), and check out this link:
http://www.kidsnutrition.org/

According to kidsnutrition, you're already at a healthy weight and really shouldn't be looking to lose any more weight. How about you work towards being fit instead? Go join a sports team or some sort of active club?

Good luck to you!

You sound like I was when I was a teen.  I am 5'4' and weighed about the same as you - 135lbs. 

When I would (freqeuntly) complain "I'm so fat", my friends/family would tell me "you're not fat stop being so hard on yourself. "

I would go on staration diets from time to time an lose 5 - 10 pounds that never stayed off, This became a vicious cycle and over the years I've gone through many periods of poor eating weighing my highest at 175 .  (However I'm using this site to help gain control of my health and lose - my goal IS 135).

A few months ago I was looking at some old family photos when I was around 14 or 15 and you know what?  I wasn't "fat" at all!  I looked like a normal healthy girl. 

I sincerely believe my early obsession with weight and diets caused my life long problems with body image and eating habits.  (I also wonder if I stunted my growth since my family is all tall except for me.)

Sorry for being so long-winded, I hope this helps you accept yourself just the way you are.

guyys, imm also a teen. i was chubby at one point, but the self esteem issues casued me to loose too much weight, being underweight and sickly is worse than being overweight, trust me.

being OCd over what you eat, and what you do is foolish.

i found that when i returned from the summer, after losing weight, no one thought i was fat, it was all in my head. do your selves a favor if you suffer from teh same issue, talk to someone. like a professional or someone you can trust, losing weight will never make it better! If you think your fat now, you will always see yourself as fat, even if you were 90 pounds. dont mess up your growth now, thats the worse thing you can do.

You sounded like me. |'m 16, (Just turned 16 yesterday =]  ) And also 5' 4". My starting weight was around 125-130.

But I lost the weight, and so can you if you really want to. It's just hard work, and a daily process --- All about the little daily choices you make. All of them make the difference for who you're creating as a person. Whether it's food related, moral, or whatever.

~I don't know how to help you stop worrying/obsessing, because |'ve lost a lot of weight, and I still want to lose more because I still feel overweight. |'m still consumed/obsessed with thoughts all the time of the way I look, and how fat I feel. But |'m learning to live with/around it. It's all about finding a balence.. And it just takes time to find. Loving your body, eating habits, etc.

Keep your head up, you'll find a balence if you keep striving for it.

0h, and I have no idea what "normal" is, lol. Everyone to me is weird. I only know the sterotype of normal. Which means a lot of things/people. I think everyone has their own personal demons they fight everyday. Mine is just cackling all the time in my ears..  "Fatty, fatty.."   Such is life. -_-

Please don't get angry with me, but you might need to seek therapy.  There may be something else in your life that isn't right, but you are blamming your body.  You need to look inside and to really see what what image is reflected in the mirror.  It's not your body and loosing weight isn't the "cure all".  Good luck to you.

I have to agree with some of the posters.  Take it from people who are a little older (it is hard to think past highschool at your age, no offense, but it is true, you have a long life ahead of you and I would hate to see you ruin it because of something that you can get professional help for)(oh yeah, I'm 25).  You need to talk to someone a little older about this.  If you don't feel comfortable talking to your parents, then maybe a school nurse or counselor (I can never spell that right).  I can understand that you want to lose weight, but at this point in your life you should probably be more focused on becoming more healthly .  Part of becoming healthy is how you view yourself.  It is no wonder that you think this way about yourself with everything that you see everyday.  All of these women in magazines have been airbrushed to look perfect, so perfect that you feel you can never become that (which is true, unless you have someone airbrush a picture of you).

I have a 16 yr old sister who thinks she is a "cow".  She is far from it, but with everything she sees in the media, I can understand why she thinks that. 

So please talk to someone older who can help you become healthy both physically and mentally. 

If you do an internet search on body image or distorted body image you will find many articles.  As a teen I had a problem with body image.  This is very common and experts are linking body image to the high rates of cosmetic surgery (not that it really pertains to you).

When I was your age I was always thinking I needed to lose weight.  I was 5', 110 lbs and fairly active in school and at home.

It wasn't until I took psychology courses in college that I realized it was more of a problem with body image than it was with my appearance.  I could have probably stood to do some toning exercises because I had a small "pooch" on my stomach and my thighs weren't as firm as they could have been.

Now at 32, after having 2 kids and being between 165-175 durning non-pregnancy stages of my life, I have come to realize that I still have problems with a distorted body image.  Most of the time I don't realize exactly how much weight I have gained.  I know what the scale says but my mental picture of myself is smaller than what I see in the mirror.

I would suggest, like others have, that you talk to your parents or maybe another female relative.  It might be a good idea to see a pediatrition, family doctor or nutritionist to help you define a healthy weight and personalized plan for food choices, diet and exercise.

Hey, I'm 20 years old, and very petite- almost 5ft, 111lbs- and I still feel fat sometimes.  It's society and it's the way other people treat eachother, but 5'4'' 133lbs is NOT overweight.  At all- you're probably healthy and might just want to tone up.  Maybe just regular excercise can help, because your body needs food and nutrients now at 15 more that ever.  When I was in middle school I was a chubby kid, I weighed about as much as you- but I'm a very short person, so 133 lbs looked worse on me- but I lost weight from like 15 to 17 because a lot of it was still just babyfat.  I didn't do much, I just sort of went away.  Anyway, I'm not saying don't try to stay healthy because one thing I've learned is that good eating habits start young- and excercise is always great- it relieves stress and relaxes you and tones you.  I haven't seen you but I think that you're probably not "fat" at all.  Here's a little thing I've learned to help myself feel better.  When you're feeling really down about yourself- catch yourself and instead remind yourself of anything 3 things (physicaly or personality wise) that you like about yourself-- it boost your selfesteem!!!  But hey I think there's plenty of women who would kill to be your size!

I just wanted to add something to my above post. 

Today's society is full of mixed messages.  We see supermodels on the runway that almost resemble walking skeletons.  We also have fast food chain that push "value sized" meals loaded with calories and fat.  It's difficult enough being a teenager without all the suggestive advertising that you're subjected to.

Again, I'd suggest talking to your parents.  Try not to let them give you "Oh honey your look fine, you're still growing".  Be firm and tell them you are concerned about your weight and overall health.

I'm 25, 5'7" tall and currently weigh (as of today 226lbs) When I was 15 I weighed in at 175 and was in a size 11.  I looked good (looking back now) but had a little belly pooch.

All I can advise is to avoid the fast foods that everyone is eating. (FRIES ARE BAD) Go for the healthier stuff and get into that school gym - almost all schools have gyms now - at least 3 times a week and take advantage of your PE classes - get as active as you can to help burn off the extra lbs that are bothering you - Just work towards a healthy BMI. :)

Hey - really - don't waste your time comparing your body to others in your class - genetics makes you who you are, you can't really change that - this is something I'm trying to explain to my 13 yr old sister who's having the same issues!  After highschool - those same stick thin girls won't have so much going on for them.  Just enjoy your teenage years! 

I am a 23 year old health student. I have been involved in competitive sports my entire life & would still be considered overweight according to the BMI chart. I would just like to re-iterate that the BMI is not a valid instrument when determining ideal weight & size. It varies depending on muscle mass & body type.

In order to post this I had to sign up for the site...It asked me my weight which is 150. It says that my target weight would be 130. That is not a healthy weight for me, part of the calculation is done on whether or not I can touch my index finger to my thumb when I wrap them around my wrist...Technically mine overlap that would equal small frame...Which is definitely not the case, I chose medium frame instead because this is more realistic...

A healthy weight for me is 145. So therefore I am 5 pounds overweight, I know this because when I was in highschool I went to the Dr. for my physical...he put me on the scale, 140. I was in grade 11, my good friends weighed 120 maximum. Naturally, I started crying, asking him to put me on weight loss pills etc. He would do no such thing, I was a healthy active girl who has a significant amount of muscle mass. He also advised me not to lose any weight as it would affect my hockey & baseball...I would become unhealthy...

Despite the fact that I have a large amount of muscle mass I still have a significant amount of fat. However, muscle weighs more than fat & that is where my weight comes from...

All of you younger girls should participate in physical activity, not because you feel you have weight issues, but for health reasons...It increases blood flow, endorphins, allows your body to better use oxygen, etc..with the potential side effect of losing weight...

That being said, if you're weight is a constant issue in your life go speak to someone about this. So long as you are a healthy moderately active individual you are fine and there are so many more important things in life...Trust us when we say that when you look back on the pictures in 5-10 years you will think, boy look how small I was then