Job interview tomorrow and I don't know if I can handle it
I have panic disorder and I'm agoraphobic. Does anyone understand this illness?
If you do can you give me some words of wisdom or encouragement? I have a job interview tomorrow. I want this job, but I just don't do well on job interviews because of this condition I have. Sometimes I have to quickly stare at the floor or clutch the table or desk because I feel like my heart is going to explode or I'm going to black out. I've had other interviews where, let's just say, I fail to convince them to hire me. It's awful. Part of getting a better life for me would be having an income and something to do during the day.
Thanks for listening.
From the application process your potential employers should know about your problems and not discriminate against you because of them.
I don't want to say anything patronising like "take time to breathe" because for all I know you've heard it all before and I could be giving the way wrong advice :oS
So I'll settle for Good Luck - it isn't easy at the best of times and I hope everything turns out well - the worst thing is that they don't hire you, but there are plenty more opportunities out there with companies that will understand you better and take YOUR needs into account if this one doesn't.
Don't feel so bad, the CC people are rooting for ya!
Good Luck I have panic attacks and social anxiety. I know a bit (or possibly a lot) of what you are going through.
Just remember that YOU'VE ALREADY BEAT ALL THE PEOPLE THAT DON'T SHOW UP THEMSELVES! (AND the ones that weren't even invited to an interview.)
And also remember that it is definitely NOT going to go smoothly. That's just a fact. But it will definitely not go as horribly as you are imagining it, whether or not you actually get the job.
Don't beat yourself up about your difficulties. Just show up and do your best. Everything else is out of your control!
Keep telling yourselt you are a confident person "who does this all the time", picture yourself as someone you know who would kick this interview's ass. I won't lie, I've gone into many a situation, repeated the phrase "I am Katheryne" in my head over and over again (Kat is my very confident older sister, who can win over anyone in less than 30 seconds)
Awww, thanks guys. I guess I should feel good about myself, that I agreed to the interview in the first place...I am acting like I can do it.
doris_c, never thought of notifying them about a disability status. I will have to give that some serious consideration.
And you're right feanor, I can't control many things about the situation. What's the worst that could happen? I run out of the office screaming. At least I lived through it...that probably won't happen though.
concentrate on keeping your hands together if you dont have something to hold on to. i usually clasp my hand together in my lap or in front of me on the table-- showing your hands make you look more open, loosely clasping them gives you a bit of control and you can drop to your lap and clench if you need to.
sit up very straight. the effort to hold yourself up and pay attention to the way you are looking helps to distract from the panic.
if you cant look people in their eyes, look at a point just to the side of their eyes or above their shoulder to give the feeling and appearance of eye contact. if you can make eye contact, do so.
sometimes, when im super shaky, i go ahead and admit im nervous and that im sorry if i shake, etc. a lot of times it helps me to feel better to admit it and it also usually brings a commiserating chuckle.
good luck! and really if this keeps up-- see a dr for a medical way to manage your anxiety and panic.
What I do when I can forsee stuff like this coming? Change my mindset. The best thing to do, for me, is to turn it around and make myself believe that I OWN that business I'm applying for a job at. That I'm testing my employees (interviewer) on their ability to hire suitable employees for MY company. Of course, go in not acting like you're THE BEST (you DO still have to sell yourself), but look at it as an opportunity to test THEM.
I know. Weird. But holy CRAP does it work! I have found myself, while trying to get a job or get the result I wanted, that when I do this, it REALLY makes the person on the other side of the desk take notice! And all of a sudden it's OVER, and I'm smiling! And exhaling.....LOL.
(And...FYI....the personal injury lawsuit....? After speaking with the judge and answering his questions HONESTLY, he came back from chambers and informed the court that after my "eloquent speech" in the court, he went back to his chambers and DOUBLED all of the monetary compensation he had previously figured I was entitled to. My lawyer had NEVER seen such a thing, and had never HEARD of such a thing in her practice before. So you CAN have some control over an intensely terrifying situation!)
THE BEST OF LUCK!!
In general, try to think of questions you'll be asked before hand and have an idea of how you would answer them. Get your resume into your head so you can recall relevant experience when it's advantageous (e.g. "Oh, you want me to do X? It just so happens that I did X when I worked with Company Y and this is what I learned...")
The suggestion to get something to clutch besides the furniture is right on the mark (heck, Bob Dole always carried around that pencil, right?).
Be prepared for the interview, that's the #1 thing you can do. I also have that disorder and being prepared keeps me from spiraling into a panic attack.
I'm also a corporate recruiter, so here is what I need you to do. WRITE THIS STUFF DOWN. BRING IT WITH YOU. Keep a folder or something so you can glance down at your notes without being too obvious.
#1. Write down why you transitioned from each position.
#2. Write down 10 times you did really good at work; got recognition, helped a tough customer, finished a had project, etc.
#3. Write down 10 times you fell on your ass. Make sure the story has a decent ending, not "and everyone went to jail". Perhaps a story like "i misread an email and fell way behind on a project because I was going in the wrong direction. Luckily I finally found the email and was able to course correct without losing much time"
#4. Write down 10 stories that just are out of the ordinary. Weird things that came up at work or times you had to do something different.
If you do this, I 100% guarantee you are ready for any interview. It's hard work but once you do it, you'll always be prepared for interviews. Just update the stories from year to year.
Darn, this is probably too late for you. Hope the interview went well!
I used to have terrible panic attacks, mostly while driving. At first I thought I was having a heart attack. I have two different approaches to calming myself.
Mental: I do the deep breathing thing, I mentally remind myself that this is mental, not physical, and I can control my body if I can control my mind.
Physical: One thing that helps me a lot is to have some ICE COLD water on hand. For some reason, really cold water calms me down, and seems to help slow my heart rate down as well. Maybe it's just distracting. Since I usually have them in the car, I also blast the AC (or roll down the windows).
I had the interview today ( yay! I survived!) but your efforts are not lost because by Monday I will be told when my 2nd interview is (if I am chosen for a 2nd one). More opportunities for me to freak out.
It went pretty okay today...the lady who interviewed me was running so far behind on her day's schedule that she had to rush through it, which I was sort of glad for. Less time for me to panic. I feel more comfortable with women in most situations anyway. Sexist, I know.
I read on some other panic websites that the idea of distraction helps when you feel yourself going over the edge. They suggested eating sour candies to help with distraction...I tried some sugar free sour icebreakers, and going over the bridge on the bus today was not as bad.
Congratulations and good luck on the next one!
RE: sour candy or really cold water - I guess maybe it is the distraction that's key. I had never thought of it until I had to try to explain why really cold water helps. Probably anything that shocks your body a little is good because it helps snap you out of the moment. For years I wouldn't get in the car without a huge jug of ice water. If I got desperate I would splash it on my face. Not so good if you're on your way to an interview, though.
When you're dealing with something like this, it's all about learning strategies. Woo-hoo!
//UPDATE//
I didn't get the job. They sent me an email saying they hired someone else.
Since I've graduated I've gotten rejected so many times. I've heard some variation on the tacky business speak such as my "skill set" doesn't fit with the position etc. *sigh* It's not good for a girl's self-esteem.
Anyhow, back to my jobless ways. I think it might be a good idea for me to focus on my psychiatric health at this point before I look for another job. Fortunately I have a highly supportive spouse. He makes my life a lot easier.
I'm preparing to go to a third interview myself, and I'm still scared to death even after meeting these people on two other occassions. Honestly, being shy sucks, but I also constantly question whether I'm good enough for the job or not. I know I shouldn't think like that, but I do. I also know that I'm intelligent and can handle anything, but it's always in the back of my mind that I'm not good enough. It's hard. I hope you're able to find a job that's a great match for you. Good luck!!!
Well, that's one way to look at it, but I like this one better: They didn't get you. Their loss, and another company WILL get you!
(And you know, just by going on the interview, you've learned that yes, you CAN go to an interview, and I think that's a great thing to know about yourself -- you can do it!)
If you haven't read "Knock 'Em Dead," please do. I found it very helpful. I read through it a few times before I was convinced about its methods and advice, and I still might quibble with a few things, but it is very good.
If there's anything we can do, please tell us. And remember that somebody is almost always here if you need to talk.
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