"kind-of cheating"

NOTE:  Im not asking what cheating is

Granted Ive been happily single for some time so a bit out of the loop, but got a chuckle out of the idea "not full blown cheating" on another post only to realize whats black and white to me may be on a scale to others.

Do you consider there to be what might be called "kind-of cheating"? 
Curious what would qualify to others.

No need to get graphic 

edited to clarify what Im not asking - got that one figured out.

depends on what your definition of 'is' is. ;)

Clinton reference?

apropos of the discussion, I think. :)

If I wouldn't want my SO to find out, it's definitely cheating.

If you feel guilty/ a need to hide it, it's cheating.

I consider the same rule to be applicable to relationships as well as dieting :P

Original Post by victoriagirl:

If you feel guilty/ a need to hide it, it's cheating.

 So if you are open about it and dont feel guilty....

my definition of cheating: if it's something you feel like you have to hide...or if it's something you wouldn't be cool with your significant other doing...it's cheating.

and i was the one to call that poster out on the idea of "full blown cheating"  :)

Original Post by dreadfulpenny:

If I wouldn't want my SO to find out, it's definitely cheating.

 yeah I'd have to agree with this

I think if you are doing something you cannot freely mention to your significant other you have problems.

Now I'm not including control freaks who micromanage every breath their partner takes.

Original Post by starlitocean:

my definition of cheating: if it's something you feel like you have to hide...or if it's something you wouldn't be cool with your significant other doing...it's cheating.

and i was the one to call that poster out on the idea of "full blown cheating"  :)

 you don't need to have having sex in order to have an intimate cheating moment. treat others the way you would want to be treated

Cheating to me is nothing actually to do with me it's when you do something that makes your partner feel upset, vulnerable, or otherwise to feel insecure within the relationship.

It's their definition that defines whether it is cheating or not.

Original Post by girlfighting27:

Original Post by starlitocean:

my definition of cheating: if it's something you feel like you have to hide...or if it's something you wouldn't be cool with your significant other doing...it's cheating.

and i was the one to call that poster out on the idea of "full blown cheating"  :)

 you don't need to have having sex in order to have an intimate cheating moment. treat others the way you would want to be treated

 agreed...which is why i called the poster out on the concept of "full blown cheating"...i don't think sex is required for it be full blown.

hard to define, but if i cup another guy's balls, i'm definitely cheating.

WAIT -

What about my question?  Will I go ignorantly forward? 

I figured most could define cheating but is there such a thing as "kind of cheating?

I always went with if it feels right to me and you, why not (even though it didn't always feel right with me...)

Single soul exception is marriage.  Even if it feels right, and you can "cheat" with a guilt-free conscious.  Ruining a relationship between two unmarried people is bad, but ruining a marriage just sounds so much worse

Now I try my hardest not to ruin someone Else's relationship, even if it feels right, by "feels right" I simply mean you don't feel guilty and want to "cheat"...

No, there is no such thing as kind of cheating.

"hard to define, but if i cup another guy's balls, i'm definitely cheating."

PG you made me laugh so hard I coughed up my entire esophagus!

Original Post by sun123:

WAIT -

What about my question?  Will I go ignorantly forward? 

I figured most could define cheating but is there such a thing as "kind of cheating?

 Yup, there is. There is a TON of gray area. Is kissing cheating? What if the kiss is just a hello or goodbye? Or what if one party think its something more and the other doesnt? What about just seeing someone for lunch? Or talking to someone?

I think it really ends up being intent. But when does it actually become cheating? Just wanting to do something? Or actually doing it? .....

Tons and tons of "kind of cheating".....

yes! "kind of cheating" is temptation which you don't act on!

kissing a friend see ya later like a friend is not a grey area.

Frenching a friend goodbye while hubby is taking a leak is cheating.

thinking, no, not cheating

acting on thoughts, yes, is cheating

Original Post by bagga:

No, there is no such thing as kind of cheating.

"hard to define, but if i cup another guy's balls, i'm definitely cheating."

PG you made me laugh so hard I coughed up my entire esophagus!

I've cupped at least a few other guys' balls since being in my relationship. It was at work though, and they were old and wrinkly and had scrotal edema and/or varicoceles. Does that make me a cheater?  ;)

To answer the OP, here are things I would consider "kind of cheating", which I would describe as: jerk moves that you could get really pissed off about, but if you told your friends your partner "cheated" and then it turns out you were talking about this, your friends might think you were overstating things a bit, considering what is usually considered "cheating", i.e. sleeping with someone else.

-getting drunk and kissing a stranger at a bar but not going any further

-having cybersex with some anonymous internet person

-calling a chat line but not actually meeting anyone in person

-mutual groping with your old friend while watching TV but not kissing him or doing anything else (yes, I'm referring to that other thread)

-going out to a movie or dinner with an ex (but nothing happening physically) and deliberately not telling your partner about it

All of the above are infidelities of a kind, and are wrong, but if my friend called me crying because her boyfriend was a CHEATING BASTARD and she's going to LEAVE HIM AND TAKE HIM FOR ALL HE'S WORTH and I ask what he did in a shocked, supportive tone and then she tells me about one of these things happening (if it's all of them at once, or any of them happening routinely, OK, maybe then), it might just cross my mind that she might be overdramatizing a bit.

Just my .02$