How do you know...when You REALLY are comitted to starting?

Sounds like a silly question I know. But...well...I've started a hundred diets, I've been excited about starting them...and I've last past a full week at about half of them. They other half steadily dropped off, none outliving 10 months

Ok...so I've been getting more aquainted with CC. I've been posting, and trying to make a few contacts. I want to start! I do...but I'm actually afraid to. Have you ever reached a point where you feel like it's "Now or Never?". Well I'm 25, 445 pounds...and I've hit that point. 

I guess thats why I haven't started all week...I'm scared to death that this is my now...and if I screw it up...it's my last chance. Well...I'm going to try to start off by finnishing using my fasting powders left over from the last diet I lost 90 pounds on. They will only last me about a week...and then I'll go to calories.

Well, let me know if I'm just weird...or if it's perfectly normal to be terrified of starting a new diet for fear of it being the last shot.

I started and have remained at a very slow pace. Taking it slow and not expecting instant results is probably what has kept me committed. To compare the "now me" to the "then me" is like night to day, though no changes were drastic. Be the turtle, not the hare. 

Absorb health information and try new foods. Start by eliminating some of your bad habits and then mix in a bit more activity. Then start replacing certain foods with healthier options (instead of a bag of cinnamon bears I'll eat a bag of sliced apples with cinnamon). I still have days when I'll eat a 400 calorie chocolate bar (like yesterday *frowns*) because I can't find the will to stop at a single square...but as I do this I recognize it as something I rarely do and DO NOT let my entire progress unravel when I mess up. I also make sure I very, very rarely go above maintenance calories. And sometimes we just get hungry! So, through this process its important to take a deficit break every once in a while. Again, do not give up if you mess up. It happens. Just remember that one bad day is not really that bad...unless you give up completely.

Be diligent about logging your food so you can SEE immediately how an extra serving (or even an extra bite) could hold you back from reaching your goal.

As far as a goal is concerned, make it realistic. Maybe try for 10lbs the first month instead of 2lbs the first week. Give your mind and body time to adjust to the changes. Every couple months, take a week off and eat at maintenance. This will help you determine how your metabolism is working and may help you avoid plateaus or re-ignite some enthusiasm.

Find a group (or create one) with people that have similar goals. Competition and accountability are amazing motivators. Even though I'm pretty much done losing, I still check in at least once a week with my 'weight-loss group' that I've been a part of since April because their experiences are inspiring and relative.

And remember that others, just like you, have done it. Which means you can do it to. To the best of everything! You deserve to do this for yourself.

if you give us your height we might be able to suggest a good calorie number for you to try to stick to. 

Any diet is never the 'last chance.'  You just gotta pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get on with it!

"diets" don't work. You will just end up gaining all or more of the weight back. Instead make a life style change. Clean/balanced eating is the key. Something you can stick with the rest of your life. Move, workout, lift, keep active and drink tons of water, get enough rest.

The problem you've got is that you're expecting your 'diet' to be nasty.   And they usually are!!!!!  (Fasting powders sound absolutely disgusting btw -  could you bin them?) If you're expecting deprivation, misery and a hard time then you need to be motivated.   Do you need to dig deep into your motivation to jump off a high diving board?.... yes!  Do you need to have the same motivation to go on a lovely holiday?... No.   If you make weight-loss a more positive and fun experience you'll look forward to it.  If you're looking forward to something enjoyable you need ZILCH motivation.

'Lifestyle change' is where you inject the enjoyment into weight loss.  If you can eat healthy, interesting foods and love them... you'll find it easier.  If you find activities you enjoy.... you'll keep doing them.   If everything you do fits the way you like to live rather than slavishly following some daft diet devised the way someone else likes to live..... you'll be happy to do it for ever.

How to get started?.... breakfast.   Seriously.   If you have a bowl of your favourite high-fibre cereal with a splash of milk and a banana sliced up on top you've started a healthier lifestyle 100%.  If you follow that up with a healthy mid-morning snack... a slice of toast with a yoghurt and an apple.... fantastic.  Extend it to a deliciously healthy lunch... you're well on the way...  Go for a walk around the block after lunch... that's the exercise taken care of. .... No time like the present. 

A healthy lifestyle is a skill that you learn as you go along.   Think of it like learning to drive.   It's not something that happens overnight.  The results aren't instant.   You adapt and progress ... make a mistake... learn from the mistake... do it better next time.    There's no timeframe or deadline so it's not a 'last chance'.   The opposite of 'now' is not 'never'.   As when you learn to drive you get an instructor, if you're over 400lbs you should probably go to see your doctor and ask for some guidance.  Certainly you'll need a physical check before you start.  They may be able to refer you to a dietician for practical help.  Some (UK) doctors are starting to 'prescribe' subsidised gym sessions for health purposes.

Best of luck

gi jane's got it right it is a lifestyle change.  You do not have to do everything at once.

If you plug in stats you'll find that you can still eat a lot and lose pounds.  You'll be tempted to cut way back and lose quicker but you'll be much better off to lose slower and keep up you calories up and reassess often.  That with some exercise will keep your metabolism up.

Remember a diet is just what you eat. If you go over your limit, so what, go back to a healthier diet the next day.  This is something you will do for the rest of your life.  Don't beat yourself up for having an extra slice of pizza.  On the same note try to eat a salad or a cup of soup first then maybe you won't want that extra slice.

This is a fantastic place to find others who are going through or have been through the same things.  skookum has some great tips.

You can do this and your body will thank you and so will the people who love you, because you just might be around a whole lot longer.

It's a lifestyle change. You have to let go of the nasty feeling you have about it, and go for what you know. If you know nothing.. Ask around.. If you lost before.. You will lose again. Sometimes we worry about not getting it right the first time. We are going to have road blocks every now and again, but that's whats so good about it. You learn how to deal with it, and you keep on putting your best foot forward. I agree with Gi-Jane, and Skookum. If I was you. I would start after the holidays. With a clean start. You have to move as well. It's 80% food and 20% work. You have to want to do both. I've lost a lot of weight, and listen to Gi-Jane.. She's good, and she really knows her stuff.

ditto what's been said about diet vs lifestyle.  i simply eat a little less & exercise a little more.  i still get to eat pretty much the same stuff i've always eaten.  i still have spaghetti, lasagna, steak, etc.  i just eat smaller portions & pair them with a huge salad.  i still get eggs & bacon on Sunday mornings because i replaced 3 fried eggs with an egg white omelet & went from 3 pieces of bacon to one.  i've replaced vitamin D milk with 2%.  all the little things add up.  you don’t have to live on cabbage soup or cantaloupe to loose weight.  i've created a 600 calorie deficit by eating better & working out.  and it's something i'm willing and able to do for the rest of my life which is the only real way to do it.

as for “how do you know when you’re committed to starting?  when you’d rather join the gym than buy bigger pants.  at least, that was the moment of truth for me.    

can't say it any better than gi-jane, believe me she knows where its at.  as airy-fairy as this may sound, look up on this as a journey to self discovery. actually i needed to remind myself about that too, i've been trying to get back on the wagon.  and its perfectly normal to have some fear about starting new, you can even learn from that fear if you put it in perspective.  good luck & this is a great place for just putting your feelings out there. there is a large collective experience here, just keep an open mind.

"Do you need to dig deep into your motivation to jump off a high diving board?.... yes!  Do you need to have the same motivation to go on a lovely holiday?... No.   If you make weight-loss a more positive and fun experience you'll look forward to it.  If you're looking forward to something enjoyable you need ZILCH motivation."

Quoted for truth.  I feel so much better when I eat lots of healthy foods and then have the energy and health to have fun! 

My "moment of truth" came when I stepped on a scale 2.5 years ago, and the number I saw literally made me cry.  At that moment, I weighed 267 pounds.  33 years old, 5'3" tall.  It's hard to explain, but something inside me just broke at that moment.  I just couldn't keep living the way I was living.  Couldn't do it anymore.  Couldn't bear the thought of having to special order all my clothes because the size 26's at the plus-size shops and at Walmart were starting to get a little snug.

I have likened it to an addict having their "hit bottom" moment.  Addicts, if they're lucky, come to a point in which they realize that they have two options left: Get better, or die.  If I had continued down the road I was on, I would have surely put myself in an early grave, thanks to the heart disease and high blood pressure troubles that run on both sides of my family.

I was always "the fat girl."  I was a chubby little kid who grew into an overweight teen and an obese adult.  Over the years, it became part of my identity.  I feared that if I lost any weight, I would lose myself in the process.

The opposite is true.  I lost weight and I found myself.  It wasn't always easy, but losing the weight was the best thing I ever did, both physically and mentally.

Since that day on the scale, I have lost 120 pounds and kept it off.  No surgery, no Adkins diet, no cleanses, no "fasting powders" (whatever those are?  I agree with whoever said to chuck them.  Your body needs nutrients from food, not powder.)  The Calorie-Count philosophy of making better food choices (nutritionally balanced, portion controlled, all things in moderation including "treats,") and getting regular exercise is what worked for me.  Calories in vs. calories out.  I went from being a total couch potato to being an active walker...then on to cycling and running and strength training.

My advice to you - just start.  Don't think about the "what-ifs."  The only thing you have absolute control over is right now.  This very moment.  By doing the best you can with this very moment, you vastly improve your chances at a better future.

This is not a diet.  This is a change in lifestyle.  A change in the way you eat, the way you move, the way you live, and it starts now and does not end, ever.  This is about regaining control and finding your center and your source of self-discipline.  It's about understanding why you overeat (stress?  emotions?  self-esteem?) and overcoming those obstacles.

Use the tools here to find out how many calories you burn each day.  Then, use the Food Log to track what you eat and strive to eat 500 calories less than you burn each day.  This is a great way to start because you probably won't even miss those 500 calories.  You won't feel hungry but you'll start to see a difference.  If you want, go as high as a 1000 calorie difference (but no more than that, unless under medical supervision.  1000 is the max recommended deficit to have each day.)

Then, do some sort of physical activity each day.  Doesn't matter what it is, just do the best you can do, even if all you can do at first is walk around the block or around your yard.  Just do what you can, and never stop.

Most importantly, have patience and never, ever give up on yourself.  You can do this!

I woke up one morning and just knew. There were a lot of things pointing me in that direction - I am sure I don't have to list all the day-to-day humiliations and inconveniences that go along with being morbidly obese - but I think what really happened was that everything in my life clicked. I found myself truly happy for the first time in a really really long time, maybe ever. I'd gotten out of a toxic relationship a couple of years earlier and done some soul-searching, changed my life, found the most amazing man ever, plunged into a new career and bought a home all by myself...it was a busy couple of years. And then, one day I woke up and just knew that it was time to get my health in order as well. I want to live a long time, I want to enjoy my wonderful life and not have the constant shadow of living as a fat girl. And I finally feel like I deserve it.

I know it sounds cheesy but learning to love yourself for who you are right now,  and truly believing that you DESERVE to be happy and healthy and free of obesity, is the biggest step towards committing to a healtheir lifestyle. I don't think I will ever be someone who dislikes unhealthy foods like candy and chips and decadent desserts....but I have discovered that I love myself more than I love food. Wow. Never thought of it that way before, but it's true. I have a long road ahead and no doubts that I will get there this time... it's been easier than I ever imagined. Easy, no....but before I made this commitment, I imagined losing weight was something so hard I could never ever succeed, I had tried so many times and failed, and those failures really get to you. So now here I am nearly a year later, and my comittment is unwavering, I feel in control for the first time ever, and I am halfway to my goal. Not an impossible mountain, just small steps every day to get there. Some days I look back and can't believe how far I have come, and some days I feel like I am moving at a snails pace, but regardless of how I feel I just keep on keepin on. No, not easy....but not as hard as I thought either. In the end, it's just food. We all have the power to control how we use it in our lives.

EDIT: And ps, PLEASE do not torture yourself with fasting powders!! How are you supposed to learn good eating habits with those? Food is a part of our lives, you can't just eliminate it and expect to have success, food will always come back into your life so isn't it better to develop a healthy relationship with food rather than try to avoid the issue? Just my two cents on that!

Wow! Thankyou everyone for replying to my question. I'm going to get back to each and everyone...but it will take me a while as my computer keeps freezing...plus there are so many wonderful responses!

As a whole, I found my self really encouraged. I at the moment, plan on going to bed. I'm extremely motivated right now. I am so "THERE" right now. I wish it was morning so I could get on with it! I hope I still feel this way when I wake up.

Re-read this thread in the morning to get you all inspired for the day!!! :)