Do you put your life on hold ?

Do you postpone buying new clothes, dating, meeting new people in general  till you lose your extra pounds?

For me, I do that but it is a bit hard because I have gained some of the weight back. That means enjoying my new life will be postponed a little bit.

What do you guys do? does anyone here feel the same way?

Original Post by safina1:

so what about dating? it is usually an unpleasant experience for an overweight woman. Am I right?

 I don't understand why dating would be unpleasant.  Don't sell yourself short, there are most certainly plenty of guys that would like to date you right now.

Original Post by safina1:

so what about dating? it is usually an unpleasant experience for an overweight woman. Am I right?

oh, hun, no! it's only unpleasant if you make it unpleasant. yeah, there will be some guys who might not be attracted to you, but that's always gonna be the case. everyone is not atractive to everyone else. there are definitely guys out there who already think you're hot, guaranteed, and they probably wonder why you won't give them the time of day. please, don't sell all men short. there are men out there who would love to  be with you, and your weight wouldn't matter; they'd like you fat or thin. they'd be looking at you, and not your body. but before you dealt with them, you'd have to accept your body where it is first.

I totally put my life on hold when I'm focused on losing weight. Mostly because I know my friends will try to be nice and say "you look fine! Now let's do a shot" When I drink I DRINK. And then I eat.... I could easily take in 3,000 calories between drinks and shots and then 4th meal... Taco Bell is the only cure for the spins... too bad it gives you the something elses.

But I like to think of buying the new clothes and going out looking good as a reward. I'll totally reward myself once I've accomplished my goals. But I think going out and facing temptation feels like a punishment for letting myself become heavy. I deserve to feel good and I don't want to torture myself and see deserts at restaurants. Or watch my thin friends who eat anything without gaining weight and who don't go to the gym shove a deep fried something into their mouths. I'm not ready to say no yet.

I plan on practicing moderation outside of home in about 20 lbs. Right now I only eat desert that I make, because I know exactly what is in it. Plus I'm not just "interested" in losing weight. I'm commited. The difference is that when you're interested in something, you only do it when it's convenient. When you're commited, there are no excuses; just results. I'm earning the results. I'm working really hard and doing what I need to. I think that when I was just interested I would just dabble 2 days on a diet 2 days off... sure I feel like a burger. But I'm starting to realize that what I do with my day today, will either be a step towards my goal or a step away from it. And to me standing still is the same thing as walking the wrong way. 

As for dating I was 190 lbs when I met my now boyfriend. That was just under a year ago and even though he is wonderful and supportive and he's never said anything to hurt me, I got tired of feeling self conscious.

I know plenty of girls who are heavy and in good relationships or dating. I've managed to date attractive guys who like some cushion that was nice but it made me feel that because they liked it, they were looking at it more. It depends on the person. I just wanted something different. I want to be thin.

Original Post by trhawley:

Original Post by safina1:

so what about dating? it is usually an unpleasant experience for an overweight woman. Am I right?

 I don't understand why dating would be unpleasant.  Don't sell yourself short, there are most certainly plenty of guys that would like to date you right now.

I just refuse to date because I am overweight. I don't need a man who would say any stupid comments on my weight because I am oversensitive when it comes to this.

Drop40, you did an awesome job at articulating my sentiments!

Sort of. I don't buy expensive clothes. I shop the sales racks every time my weight fluctuates. My wardrobe ends up slightly limited by this but I honestly can't afford to buy a full wardrobe every time my size changes.

Thanks, now if only I could get skinny overnight... ahh we can all dream can't we!