Got a little upset

I got a little upset the other day when I saw my cousin (10 years younger, I see her maybe once a year) and she asked my sister in law if I was anorexic and said someone needed to talk to me about it.

If anyone has looked at my profile you will know that I do indeed know a bit about ED's and that this is the first time in my life I have lost weight the right way (took a couple months to lose 12lbs, been maintaining since July).

She said I was "skinny" which I consider kind of an insult.  She also said it behind my back so I could not say anything back.  I have done it all right, work out like a fiend and love the muscle I have built (can do 50 push ups for the first time in my life).  Also, there is no way to build muscle if you are not eating enough and balanced.

Curious if I am sensitive because of my past?  Is she just jealous cause I look toned? What is the dealy? Anyone have an opinion?

I think it's all of the above, poo. But never you mind her, there will always be someone wanting to cut you down for the progress that you've made! you've done a wonderful job, you're doing it the right way, you're healthy and strong and you know it!!!!

try not to dwell on her negativity too much, honey! you've come too far! :)

If she knows that you have lost weight unhealthily before, maybe she is just concerened.  I wouldn't get hung up about it. Congrats on losing weight the healthy way :)

She was to young and I was away, she does not know that I had issues before, but she does know about the world of dance.  Just seems to me a person should get credit where credit is due, SO, I thank all of you for the credit :-)

hmmmm i've dealt with that kind of thing before...she's probably just jealous. seriously, dont take it to heart unless a lot of people are telling you that you look too thin, then you might want to check with a doctor or something.

Maybe she was sincere and didn't mean any harm.  She may have asked behind your back our of concern.  Congratulations on maintaining, I hope to reach my goal some day and maintain.

You've worked hard and you have a right to be upset.  But shake it off.  Some people just don't know any better.  some people automatically assume that if someone loses wieght there must be a problem with them.  I've had people make the same type of comments to me.  It might sting a bit, just try not to pay attention to it.  You know you are healthy that is all that counts.  Besides I am sure you've gotten a fair share of compliments ;)

...did i mention you look fantastic!

People automatically assume you have an eating disorder if you lose weight and look "skinny".  I've run into it a lot.  People joke when they say it, but they're still saying it.  While I am nowhere near thin enough to be called anorexic, it still offends me all the same.  This general ignorance about weight loss and healthy eating drives me NUTS!

Dear Cousin,

It was brought to my attention that you expressed concern about my weight loss.  If I am to believe what I was told, you were concerned that I am starving myself to lose weight and suggested that someone speak to me about it.

Had you approached me and commented on my weight loss, you would know that I lost 12 pounds in two months, which is a healthy rate, and have been maintaining since July.  You would also know that I work out regularly, and am in the best physical shape of my life.  You would probably have been impressed to hear that I can do 50 push ups for the very first time in my life.   I would have told you that one of the best parts of being in this shape is that I have excellent metabolism and am able to eat more and more often now than ever before.  I would have thanked you for noticing something that I worked very hard to achieve.

What I am trying to say is that I have had a very positive experience over the past few months and would have loved to share it with you.  Your comments hurt my feelings an you owe me an apology.  You were wrong to make those comments, regardless of their intent.  I hope that we can get past this, but more than that, I hope this letter causes you to think twice whenever a situation such as this arises.  Maybe next time you will assume the best before you assume the worst.

Sincerely,

Your cousin

I've had the same thing happen to me this week.
You're not overreacting, It's not a nice thing to hear.
People really annoy me sometimes, I think there are different reasons why people say these things.
I'm sorry this happened to you.
I can totally understand why you feel upset about it, I don't know about you, but I am going to confront these people head on, and rip their heads off while I'm at it.