Is this your lucky day?

I just read this commentary from CNN. My favorite part is this:

 if someone believes his talent is inborn he'll give up quickly, because any obstacle is a sign of his limitation. He'**** a wall; he can't do something and won't ever be able to.

But if someone believes her talent grows with persistence and effort, she'll work to master the challenge. She'll view adversity as an opportunity to get better.

So here's the good news: You can change your results by changing your mind-set. When Dweck trained children to view themselves as capable of growing their intelligence, they worked harder, more persistently, and with greater success on math problems they had previously abandoned as unsolvable.

I know from personal experience that changing your mind-set will change your results. My mind-set needs to change in 2 very important ways and I'm starting on it today.

Edit to Add:  The **** above I can't get rid of. Apparently you can't say something like H_ i_ t_ a wall. Oooooooh that's so scandalous.

try putting a space between he's and hit

:D

i like those findings!

but i think yesterday was my lucky day - i won free groceries!

Spaces won't do it. I'd like to know what is so scandalous about the phrase: he'_ s h_ i_ t_ a wall. It just means someone reached a roadblock. Dumb censors!

He's  hit a wall

So you need two spaces between. Please explain why that phrase is even addressed by the censor.

And, yes I do know that "hitting it" is slang for effing. See I can write "hitting it" so why is the other censored?

You are so right about this way of thinking.

Another one is if you think that you can not change, ask yourself how certain you are that you can't.  If you are 90% certain that you can not change then how certain are you that you can change.  Keep your eye on the positive percentages and your odds will increase on changing your thinking patterns.

Because we had a problem a while back with members using **** to often.  C-C is PG and the owners decided to edit certain words.

In your journal you can use it as often as you want.

Original Post by moonikins:

So you need two spaces between. Please explain why that phrase is even addressed by the censor.

And, yes I do know that "hitting it" is slang for effing. See I can write "hitting it" so why is the other censored?

 i think the problem is with the s  at the end of he's, followed by hit? Double space fixes it.

edit to add: another word for poo?

hee hee edit X2 to delete the obvious

if people didn't try to thwart the language filters by leaving spaces between letters (or substituting letters), then you wouldn't have to add an extra space between s and hit

why don't people abide by the rules on a free, very helpful website?

because people are unruly i guess...

but back on topic -

i'm not sure if i'm remembering this correctly, but it seems like i read in a sociology class that men are more likely to think that their effort is awesome while women are more likely to doubt their effort will be sufficient.

if that's true, that's unfortunate for women

I think a lot of the time, with both sexes, kids don't believe they can do something until they are told, or rather, convinced that they can. I think accomplishing hard things is the root cause of good self esteem.

I think accomplishing hard things is the root cause of good self esteem.

Yes, I believe that's true. Along the same lines, giving everyone a certificate of excellence means nothing to anyone. And giving everyone a trophy for showing up means nothing as well.

i'm not sure if i'm remembering this correctly, but it seems like i read in a sociology class that men are more likely to think that their effort is awesome while women are more likely to doubt their effort will be sufficient.

if that's true, that's unfortunate for women

I remember reading something very similar. I also remember reading that most men overestimate how good looking they are and most women underestimate their looks. Very sad.

yes, yes!

men tend to be over-confident and more likely to blame others when they don't succeed

women tend to be under-confident and more likely to blame themselves when they don't succeed

of course, these are tendencies, not written in stone.  i do know some men who lack confidence and some women who are brimming with it -- the information was from about 15 years ago, so perhaps it's less true now than it used to be

:)

What if you believe both? I believe my talent is inborn--I exhibited signs of it way before other kids and even adults-but I also believe it improves if you apply yourself. I improved that way.

I think if you approach your life from that point of view you are very well-balanced indeed.

Original Post by coffincritter:

What if you believe both? I believe my talent is inborn--I exhibited signs of it way before other kids and even adults-but I also believe it improves if you apply yourself. I improved that way.

 I like this way of thinking.  I sing.  I was able to hold a pitch before I even knew what that meant.  I believe that is an inborn talent.  But I applied myself and improved even more.  However, some talents have limitations no matter how much you want to apply yourself.  I'm good.  But no matter how much I practiced and took lessons, I was never able to reach that professional level.  I think that depending on what kind of "talent" we are talking about, a little of both ways might need to be applied.

people who study that sort of thing say that 'innate talent' is pretty much the result of intense practice extended over a minimum of 10 years

but what mooni is talking about is just about what people believe - whether your locus of control is internal or external