Men with EDs

I suspect that a male friend of mine has an ED.  I would like to offer my support, but I am not positive that: (1) I am reading the situation correctly or (2) he realizes he might have an issue.  The last thing I want to do is offend or alienate him, but I am concerned.  Does anyone have advice specifically targeted to men with EDs? 

I don't think men are any different to women when it comes to this one really.  It's probably best to start with some gentle inquiries into his health. Rather than making accusations or leaping to conclusions, ask if anything's wrong, if he's worried about something, if he's feeling OK.... tell him you're worried that he's not eating properly (or whatever it is you've noticed) but be a friend basically and listen to what he has to say.  

It could be that there's a different explanation to the one you expect.  He could have an illness he's not told you about, for example.   It could be that he thinks he's just fine and tells you to back off!  It could be that he takes the opportunity to open up and ask you to help him.  There's no 'right way' to handle this kind of situation...  Best of luck

Thank you for your reply, gi-jane. 

I think I should have been more specific, and I apologize in advance if I use a term that is not generally accepted within the community of those with EDs.  Another friend of mine and I strongly suspect that our friend might be anorexic, and here's why:

1.  We have both known him for a number of years, and over the past 2 1/2 years, we have seen him go from very fit and reasonably conscientious about what he eats to being emaciated (for his frame); and

2.  He is obsessed with his food intake and the timing of that intake, to such a degree that he isolates himself and passes up social opportunities if they do not fit into his food-consumption schedule.  This is a particular problem because he and I have discussed his desire to be more socially active, including dating, etc., but he is so rigid that he gets in his own way.  He and the other friend I mentioned earlier tried unsuccessfully to date, but his food scheduling issues created some barriers that were very difficult to overcome. 

I guess the reason for my post is that I do not have any experience with supporting those dealing with anorexia, of either gender, but I've never actually heard of an anorexic man, though I'm sure they're out there.  I just wonder whether there are particular issues unique to men with anorexia about which I should be aware.

And, as someone who is recovering from anorexia personally, I can reassure you you haven't said anything offensive. Anorexia is stereotyped as a "woman's disease", but the damage, the stress and the physical and mental distortion are the same whatever the gender of the sufferer.

What you have described sounds bang on like anorexia nervosa. The trouble is, you cannot make him start to get better unless he wants to - like how you cannot make a smoker quit, or cannot make a person kick any other bad habit unless they want to change. As Jane has said, express your concerns to him but know that you cannot force him to go and see his doctor or to even begin to ease off of his rigidity unless he is ready to let go of it and move on. Ask him about how he has been lately, if anything in his life has been stressing him out. Whatever you do do not force it on him, do not blurt it to his face: "I think you have anorexia", but just listen and tell him you're worried about how drawn he's getting, and how down he seems.

If you would like to know about the disease anorexia nervosa itself, here are some very useful websites for friends of suffers, or potential sufferers.
http://www.something-fishy.org/
Something Fishy: Eating Disorders in Men
Breakdown of Symptoms and Effects of Anorexia from NetDoctor.co.uk
B-EAT: What is Anorexia Nervosa?
B-EAT: Men get eating disorders too

Thank you very much for your reply and for the linked sites.