Men or Women

So who goes crazy more often? The husband or wife in a marriage?

Growing up I always thought the man was the one that went crazy and left the wife to find hotter younger females and to party and what not.

Now all I am hearing about are the women leaving their husbands to "live their lives" and what not.

So what do you think? Who goes crazy more often?

My opinion - It totally depends on age. I think the younger the person is to get married, the more likely they will wake up one day and think they missed out or something.

Also, I am pretty sure this has discussed in the lounge in the past but its been awhile.

Does "go crazy" = "have an affair"? Then it's probably equal.

Does "go crazy" mean just had it up to here with the lazy, no good, spendthrift.... Oh, sorry, got lost there for a moment....

More women are taking the initiative to leave an unhappy/unsatisfying marriage, than say, 30 years ago, but overall, I don't think assigning blame really makes a difference.

Pretty much 6 of one, half dozen of the other

What do you mean by go crazy?

I agree with K above. It seem to me that more women leave sooner in a marriage than they used to do. I think that has to do with having more freedom and equality in many areas. Women don't feel as stuck as they used to.

This is simple:

Women have all this equipment that guys don't have that cause women to go a little crazy in the head since their fluids get all out of whack on a monthly basis, during pregnancy, or during menopause.  Their craziness leads men to go crazy.

So, in essence, everyone is crazy, and it is all the fault of mothers since they continue to manufacture babies.

Do you think it is crazy for a man or woman to leave a failed marriage?  I don't and I think they do so in equal numbers.

Original Post by dnrothx:

This is simple:

Women have all this equipment that guys don't have that cause women to go a little crazy in the head since their fluids get all out of whack on a monthly basis, during pregnancy, or during menopause.  Their craziness leads men to go crazy.

So, in essence, everyone is crazy, and it is all the fault of mothers since they continue to manufacture babies.

 Really? The 'poor engineering' card, again???

Original Post by kathygator:

Original Post by dnrothx:

This is simple:

Women have all this equipment that guys don't have that cause women to go a little crazy in the head since their fluids get all out of whack on a monthly basis, during pregnancy, or during menopause.  Their craziness leads men to go crazy.

So, in essence, everyone is crazy, and it is all the fault of mothers since they continue to manufacture babies.

 Really? The 'poor engineering' card, again???

Lol I just assumed he was joking.  It reminded me of something we'd study in my feminism class about the attitudes toward women in the 19th century.  "Hysteria" and a whole host of other psychological problems were thought to be caused by physical problems with our reproductive organs.  That was because in the 19th century, women were treated by male doctors who didn't know anything about women and didn't give a crap either.

Original Post by carrie317:

 

 

Lol I just assumed he was joking.  It reminded me of something we'd study in my feminism class about the attitudes toward women in the 19th century.  "Hysteria" and a whole host of other psychological problems were thought to be caused by physical problems with our reproductive organs.  That was because in the 19th century, women were treated by male doctors who didn't know anything about women and didn't give a crap either.

 This reminds me of the hilarity of finding out that 19th century women that had "nervous disorders" or "hysteria" and the like, would go to their doctors and basically be stimulated by their doctors (with vibrators...heehee, old-fashioned vibrators!) until they had an orgasm. Of course, most women didn't know what an orgasm was because of the repression of the period.

Interesting link:

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2737 /did-victorian-era-doctors-use-vibrators-to-t reat-hysteric-female-patients-with-orgasm-the rapy

Original Post by kathygator:

Original Post by dnrothx:

This is simple:

Women have all this equipment that guys don't have that cause women to go a little crazy in the head since their fluids get all out of whack on a monthly basis, during pregnancy, or during menopause.  Their craziness leads men to go crazy.

So, in essence, everyone is crazy, and it is all the fault of mothers since they continue to manufacture babies.

 Really? The 'poor engineering' card, again???

 Again, and always, until you guys fix it! :D

Original Post by moonikins:

What do you mean by go crazy?

I agree with K above. It seem to me that more women leave sooner in a marriage than they used to do. I think that has to do with having more freedom and equality in many areas. Women don't feel as stuck as they used to.

 Some women may leave sooner, but others don't.  I have been married almost 20 years (got married when I was 19) and just recently left my husband (in July). I wanted to believe that if I only tried hard enough that things would get better.  Granted, the entire 20 years was not miserable; there were good years and bad years.  But when the bad began to outweigh the good, I just couldn't put my kids through it anymore.  We are both in counseling and that is a good thing.  He is all for reconciliation, but I'm not there yet.  Possibly I won't be.  And that's okay, because as far as I'm concerned we can both come out of this as better people and better parents.

Does that make me crazy? If so, then I'll claim it.  Life happens.

Oh sorry I didnt clarify on the "crazy" part.

I guess I mean I know a lot of girls & boys both that "go crazy" and wake up in their marriage and think to themselves "I didnt live my life like I wanted to" and then they leave. The other spouse did nothing necessarily to deserve it.

Original Post by alaskanmama:

Original Post by moonikins:

What do you mean by go crazy?

I agree with K above. It seem to me that more women leave sooner in a marriage than they used to do. I think that has to do with having more freedom and equality in many areas. Women don't feel as stuck as they used to.

 Some women may leave sooner, but others don't.  I have been married almost 20 years (got married when I was 19) and just recently left my husband (in July). I wanted to believe that if I only tried hard enough that things would get better.  Granted, the entire 20 years was not miserable; there were good years and bad years.  But when the bad began to outweigh the good, I just couldn't put my kids through it anymore.  We are both in counseling and that is a good thing.  He is all for reconciliation, but I'm not there yet.  Possibly I won't be.  And that's okay, because as far as I'm concerned we can both come out of this as better people and better parents.

Does that make me crazy? If so, then I'll claim it.  Life happens.

Alaskanmama -- I think sooner is a relative term.  I recently left my husband of 24+ years.  Sooner  would have been better.

But I don't think I went "crazy" -- and many people (his side) would say I did just what priceless7 says, above.  Although they are right, in a way -- he did NOTHING!!!!! (just not "nothing to deserve it)

Original Post by coach_k:

Original Post by alaskanmama:

Original Post by moonikins:

What do you mean by go crazy?

I agree with K above. It seem to me that more women leave sooner in a marriage than they used to do. I think that has to do with having more freedom and equality in many areas. Women don't feel as stuck as they used to.

 Some women may leave sooner, but others don't.  I have been married almost 20 years (got married when I was 19) and just recently left my husband (in July). I wanted to believe that if I only tried hard enough that things would get better.  Granted, the entire 20 years was not miserable; there were good years and bad years.  But when the bad began to outweigh the good, I just couldn't put my kids through it anymore.  We are both in counseling and that is a good thing.  He is all for reconciliation, but I'm not there yet.  Possibly I won't be.  And that's okay, because as far as I'm concerned we can both come out of this as better people and better parents.

Does that make me crazy? If so, then I'll claim it.  Life happens.

Alaskanmama -- I think sooner is a relative term.  I recently left my husband of 24+ years.  Sooner  would have been better.

But I don't think I went "crazy" -- and many people (his side) would say I did just what priceless7 says, above.  Although they are right, in a way -- he did NOTHING!!!!! (just not "nothing to deserve it)

 Yes, sooner would have been better in my family's situation as well.  But, it is not an easy thing to walk out after that many years together.  Even when there are very good reasons.  My biggest regret in not leaving sooner is that I subjected my three kids to a lot of anger and animosity between my husband and I.  The kids always come out on the losing end, because it isn't as though they can "leave" either parent.  Hopefully (prayerfully) two happier homes will be better for them than one miserable one.

Amazingly but all these analogies dont really fit every persons situation....there is no "cookie cutter" everyone falls into this if they do that...I know because I am currently in a divorce after 30 years of marriage....and no I wasnt some damn bum or low life...I didnt cheat on my wife (although in retrospect maybe I should have)...did we marry early in life...yeah we did...did that cause it? ummm no...the only person I blame in a failed marriage is the two people who are married...her and I..and if you feel like you want to have pity for "her" my S2BX doesnt have to work another day in her life....my 2 cents and I guess at this point I dont care if anyone likes my opinion on it...its the "bums" opinion here that counts...

Original Post by dnrothx:

This is simple:

Women have all this equipment that guys don't have that cause women to go a little crazy in the head since their fluids get all out of whack on a monthly basis, during pregnancy, or during menopause.  Their craziness leads men to go crazy.

So, in essence, everyone is crazy, and it is all the fault of mothers since they continue to manufacture babies.

What if a woman doesn't have any of those things? :o

Original Post by cptbunny:

Original Post by dnrothx:

This is simple:

Women have all this equipment that guys don't have that cause women to go a little crazy in the head since their fluids get all out of whack on a monthly basis, during pregnancy, or during menopause.  Their craziness leads men to go crazy.

So, in essence, everyone is crazy, and it is all the fault of mothers since they continue to manufacture babies.

What if a woman doesn't have any of those things? :o

 Nuclear holocaust.

Aw Dave. No one thinks you're a bum. I hope you find your way through this and emerge stronger, healthier and happier on the other side.

you can't really generalize it, but it seems like the current stereotype is more of the woman "wakes up" and realizes she hates her life and wants independence, and the man checks out emotionally and becomes permanently distant. 

Original Post by huggitbear:

you can't really generalize it, but it seems like the current stereotype is more of the woman "wakes up" and realizes she hates her life and wants independence, and the man checks out emotionally and becomes permanently distant. 

 Meh, guys do that, too.  There was an article in the NYTimes about some woman that stuck by her man as he treated her and his family like dirt since he went through some mid-life crisis.

Only took six months or so and he snapped out of it.

Despite her rosy-colored description of the results, I do wonder if irreparable damage was done.

Not irreparable, but it takes a while to offer ones heart back up. As long as the partner is willing to acknowledge and understand that, the couple can come out of it with an even deeper understanding of one another.