Mind Your Business! Nosy co-workers

Hello CC,
I've had an epiphany.
How much I lose, my weightloss goals and my healthier eating choices are my own business. It is a very private matter that I may choose to share with those people whom I trust or may help.
After losing 50lbs through exercise and healthy eating, I encountered many jealous co-workers who constantly harrassed me. They discouraged me from losing any more weight even though I was over 160lbs at 5'6" and criticized my eating habits. I always found that odd since they never commented when I was 200+lbs and very unhealthy
Well, after months of their sarcastic remarks, it got to the point that I became very self-conscious and always justified my eating plan.
THAT WAS A BIG MISTAKE. I ended up gaining a few lbs and became discouraged. I know realize that I dont't have to justify my actions.
It is NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. In the end, I have to live my life and continue on this healthy journey.

can I say that you are writing my story???????

I made the same mistake and gained 30 pounds over 5 months...

In fact, I am looking for another job because I hate my workplace and my evil co-workers.

Please dont let them get you. it is ok to gain just a few pounds, I am sure you will lose them very fast. How funny, I was about to ask if anyone out there has gained weight because of the co-workers.. and how they react to the situation.

we can support each other calbert, if you don't mind.

I am now 173. what about you?

hellooo can you say jealousy?? you were the person whomade them look good now youre the person whomakes them look bad. get it? green with jealousy!!!! feels good dont it!!! heehee!! enjoy! 

You are right.  It is none of anyone's business about your weightloss goal and healthier eating.  I have lost a significant amount of weight and hate it when I get asked "How much did you lose", "How much more are you going to lose", "What size are you", "How many sizes have you gone down" or "Wow you have lost soooo much weight".  Was I that much of a pig before?  Did I look that horrible?  I am still  pretty overweight for my height and get comments like "You don't need to lose anymore" or "Stop you look good now".   I would never ask anyone specific questions about their weight and consider it rude to ask how much you weigh, because most of the preceding questions are trying to ask that.  At first I was good natured and when asked about how much I lost I would say "not enough" but I had one person ask a couple of times and even demanded to tell her "How much have you lost, I wanna know!!".  Others will just rephrase the question to "What size are you now" or something.  I don't think people are being mean but I just they are not thinking.  I confided with 1 of my coworkers about this and she stated she didn't mind people knowing her weight but she is not "OBESE".  I think she would mind if she had a weight problem. Thanks for listening to me rant.

 

it's so sad but people always want there to be someone whose fatter than them to make them feel better about themselves...the more larger people, the better. :/

ignore them 100% :D

keep going

good job!!!

hey calbert! it is really good you nipped that in the bud! i am sure it was not easy and the remarks are unpleasant.

Jealous,  and they are lashing out at you 'cause they can't do it and it t's them off.  Hold your head up high on your skinny body and keep on keeping on!!!!!

CONGRATS!

It is actually very empowering to know that I don't owe anybody an explanation.
It got to the point that I became very self-conscious around them. I now know that I don't really have to answer to their negativity. Now, as for those people who are close to me and I trust and love, I can discuss this topic as it is very sensitive.

So good of you to find out this early and not after you already gained a whole bunch !!!

I got people telling me that I look 'perfectly fine like this' and 'you don't need to lose weight at all' even when I was obese !! Ok I might 'carry it well' that doesn't mean I am healthy !!! Very irritating indeed ! Especially when you get the feeling you have to justify your eating healthy and working out, totally ridiculous if you ask me !!!

I've had the same thing almost!

I don't work (yet) but when I mentioned to my friends and to my Mom that I was going to eat more healthy/eat cleaner, excercise and try to lose weight they were all like "you're tiny enough, you don't need to lose ANY weight" but I'm barely in the healthy range!

I almost think they're afraid I'll get skinnier than they will. I'm doing this for ME; and what they think, doesn't matter.

Omg that is horrible! This actually happened to my mom recently, and I think it sabotaged her new eating lifestyle. She would tell me how women at work would make snotty remarks like, "You're eating salad for lunch AGAIN? Aren't you sick of that!?" and it's like, REALLY, don't you have anything else to occupy your life with!?!? Those people are just pathetic. Just think about how boring their existence must be if they have to comment on somebody's lunch choice.

You should think of this as a huge compliment, because the commentary just means that people are noticing how great you look! They're just projecting their own insecurities about themselves onto you with nasty comments and trying to drag you down with them. Ignore it and keep on striving for your healthy life!

In some cases, especially with people who really care about you, it's not always malicious. I am 5'3" and 127 lbs, and my mother tells me I don't need to lose any more weight. She's right, I'm fine as I am, but she told me the same thing when I was 145.

In her case, and I suspect this is the case with many older people, being too thin is associated with being unwell.

It takes a very strong person to ignore those comments - so good for you.  I think it's almost always coming from a place of self-consciousness and guilt..  If that person is overweight or unhealthy, and knows it, watching someone do the things s/he knows s/he should be doing is threatening.  The fact is that those co-workers need to be doing exactly what you're doing and they know that.  If they don't have the motivation to do it, they need to find some way to make themselves feel okay about it - to find an excuse or reason.  Some people do that by putting the healthier person down.  The comments they are making are actually directed at themselves not you.  They are designed to make themselves feel better, not to hurt you.

And there are some people who do mean well they just don't get that it's actually not particularly pleasant for somebody who's lost a lot of weight to have people constantly talk about it.  You would think that the attention would feel great but often it doesn't.  They mean well, but you have to put some boundaries about how much you will share and how much you will let the comments get to you.  When we are very sure that what we are doing is the right path for us, it becomes a little easier because the comments don't hurt as much.  I think the key is to stay focussed on yourself and what you want.

I hate when people comment on what you eat and scrutinize every bite!!!  Just yesterday I had someone come up in my face, right above my bowl of grilled chicken, salsa, and carrots (great combo btw) and ask me what I was eating with this awful look on her face.  I'm sorry but if you don't like what someone is eating mind you own business!!! Sorry to vent but that just really pissed me of

oh my!

i am happy i work in a small firm and there are not many people around.

i have one coworker who has been always commenting on my food (before dieting). i am a vegetarian so to him my meals were weird (they were nothing weird, things like bread, cheese and avocado etc. but he is pretty conservative and a bit older) and sometimes he commented on how healthy i ate. last time he did this i just looked him in the face and said SO WHAT? he looked really scared, mumbled something to himself and left the room walking backwards. LOL.  

bump!

I work with mostly skinny people so I always am self conscious with what I am eating. 

duplicate...

I don't understand why people have to mind others business when it's not called for their help. I tend to want to help others, but unless asked for help, or if I see them with trouble I ask if they need some help, they can tell me wheather they do need help or not. But in my workplace, they seem to stand around when you're on the phone to see what's the topic about, and then suggest or tell you that you're in the wrong place or whatnot, which is non of their business.

Example, Today morning, I come into work, some guys are going into the boss's computer to have more access to the internet, whatever, I dont care is not my business. So one of them while Im at the phone stands around and very obviously tried to listen, the other person working on the fax machine, takes a stiky note from my desk and writes a note about what I am talking on the phone, then I let him know very quickly because I am on the phone, that I already know, very fast he gets upset that I rejected his note and he gets MAD.... what the beans is that, I really would appreciate for these people to not interrupt me anymore, but like you said, i really like your first sentence,

IT IS EMPOWERING TO KNOW THAT WE DONT OWE AN EXPLANATION TO ANYONE..... AND i will not give any explanations to anyone from now on that I dont want to give to....

Thanks for your words... =)

I'd turn it back on them.

"not much - how much have YOu lost?"

"couple sizes - what size are YOU now?"

"salad? Its my FAVORITE! Where's yours?"

Offer them some of your old clothes. MUAHAHAH "hey, these don't fit anymore and they look your size!" (doesn't matter what size they are. it'd still be funny.)

Nobody has told me to stop yet though. :( Only ppl who know I"m trying have said anything positive. So I really don't have any of these types of problems. Only once someone said "that's a big salad" and it was, so I just nodded)

Very true. It is YOUR body, and YOUR decision. More power to you, for deciding to take care of it! I didn't take care of mine, and it got me in a whole stack of trouble--only last year did I really start taking ahold of the reins, and only within the last four months did everything settle.

But the most terrible part of it for me, was one someone close to me told me very politely that I looked good, I lost weight, and they hated me now. They had been very much an enabler in my eating habits and I had just started pulling away from that which caused some friction, then when I began losing weight I guess it all just fell apart.