My boyfriends away at college and I get to see him at weekends but we're extremely close,we spend all the time we have together and leaving him is so hard,I feel so depressed and little tasks seem so hard..Is anyone in this same situation?
I was in the same situation four years ago. My then-girlfriend lived in Rochester. I lived in Buffalo. 1 1/2 hours away. We saw each other on weekends and called during the week, but... honestly, it was hard. It was real hard. There's really no GOOD way to deal with that.
But... have heart. It CAN work out. That woman 1 1/2 hours away ended up becoming my wife. :)
Just... try to stay upbeat. Find ways to enjoy the time you spend away from your boyfriend and enjoy every minute you can with your boyfriend.
That stinks! How about instead of focusing on the fact that you can't see him during the week, you look FORWARD to seeing him this coming weekend.
Get your chores done and live your life but maybe you could make plans for the weekend. Like, skim through the movie listings and pick out what you want to see. If you cook for him, you could gather your ingredients throughout the week and come up with your meal plan. Look for things to do like a hill to go sledding on (If it snows in your area). That kind of stuff.
It will get easier as your life becomes busier, your time will be full of things to do and before you know it...the weekend is here.
Thanks so much,those really helped. I find it hard when I feel like i'm the only one going through this but it helps when others relate...hkellick:thank you for not saying things get easier like most people,it's refreshing when someone actually admits to it being hard,thanks! and congratulations on your situation working out so well,my boyfriend and I talk about marriage all the time,though we are young..good to see you got through it :)
Be happy that you have someone to feel that way about. You're very lucky.
And like others have said, you have something to look forward to.
My boyfriend and I went to different colleges and only ended up seeing eachother once a month, if that. Phone calls (which weren't often since cell phones weren't quite popular yet and long distance was expensive) and online chatting helps alot. And make sure you have a small group of close-knit friends for comfort and to keep you occupied.
Yes, stay serious and be very honest with each other and it will be fine. I have had two long distance relationship..the first was through college and unfortunately didn't work out (we truely grew apart). The second was really really long distance...pennsylvania to california. He was a friend in college who joined the airforce before we started dating and ended up there when we realized we wanted to be together. And now he's my husband and we're living together :-) So, trust me, it can definitely work. And I know how hard that waiting is...but when it's over and you're finally together, you'll appreciate the hard work you put into it.
My boyfriend went to west point and is now in the army, the only time we were together after high school was for school breaks and occasional weekends. Now he's in Ranger school and I wont be able to have any contact with him until March. There are a few important things to remember in a long distance relationship.
1. support. you have to support him unconditionally, you are not there to make him feel guilty about not being near you all the time because all it does is make him and you feel bad, let him know you miss him but you're okay!
2.stay busy. use your free time for you! go to the gym and get into great shape so when he sees you he is amazed by how good you look, concentrate on work or on school, read a new book!
3. keep the relationship fresh. send care packages with his favorite food, magazine, send photos. plan things for the time you do have
4. take the time to realize that while you are in a relationship, the relationship isn't your definition. remember that you can live and be happy and be in love apart too! love isnt about becoming one person its about being two people who want to be together (even if the situation isn't perfect)... and encourage him to find out more about him too
5. Never ever let him forget how much you love him! you cant control every aspect of the relationship or his feelings for you, but you can give him a reason to never think you dont care.
Let me give you some heart felt advice here - I think you should look at this as opportunity instead of being ripped in half and being depressed - in all relationships there should never ever be the burden of being someones EVERYTHING placed on anybody! A healthy relationship is two whole people complimenting each other in a balanced and healthy way.
Go out with your friends - take a class or extra curricular you have wanted to but didn't because it infringed on your together time. Work on becoming a happy person with or without your boyfriend - that is a gift you give yourself - knowing you can be more than excellent alone or in a relationship - it makes you a much better catch and a much better partner to someone!
I have been down this road - and heaping all your emotional stuff onto one person is kind of needy and not healthy for you. Being the best partner you can be means being able to stand on your own with your own interests and your own time to yourself - it really does!!
Perception is stronger than truth often times - if you perceive this time as being good for both of you to make your relationship even better then it won't seem so bad!
:) This is old lady advice - but I really have been down this road and I lost the person I loved by clinging on too tightly and not having my own opinions and boundaries - when I got those - I got the guy back and we are now getting married and it is so wonderful to be in a healthy balanced relationship!! It is relaxing and wonderful!!
Take care!
My boyfriend lives 2.5 hours away. 
We've both planned our weekends so that we get to spend them together as much as possible and there are phone calls and text messages. 
During the week I get insanely busy and he's also got a lot going on. It's doable although I wouldn't have thought so before meeting him.
When you start to really feel bad about not seeing your boyfriend (and I understand COMPLETELY how hard it is) be thankful that he is not in Iraq or some other war zone where you don't know if he is even safe and you won't see him AT ALL for 18 months. Sometimes it helps to see that other people have it WORSE than you--and then take the other helpful hints that were posted!
keep yourself busy to keep your mind off of how much you miss him
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