3 months 30 pounds... and now it's ALL SLIPPING AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! falling off the wagon for 3 weeks

uuuggghhhh!! I am 3 weeks into a downward spiral after 3 months of steady loss...

I just cannot find the motivation to get back on!  I dunno what to do.  after losing 30 pounds... I am back up 3 pounds and just cannot seem to get back on track.  each day is a struggle with self sabbotage... grrrrrrrrrrr...

First breathe!  I know you're back up 3.... but you've caught it before it's that 30 all back so that's a small comfort I hope.  As for getting back on track, were you restricting too much maybe and that part has set you up to not want to?  or maybe were you doing exercise that was easily boring? 

If either of those things is it... maybe do some different exercise or change up your "diet" so it doesn't feel so bad.  I know it's not easy but you'll get back on!

how are your counts? are you counting? if not just start counting without changing anything else. then, 

if your having a hard time restricting, eat to maintenance for a few days to get your good habits back, then look at creating a sustainable deficit, you don't have to go super low right away.

just start tracking your intake and comparing it to your expenditure, and shoot for a few 100 cal deficit. you can turn up the weight loss volume later, sounds like right now you just need to get back in the groove. . . . and you can groove!

30 lbs is amazing! good for you! and 3 months is really fast! if you want to keep it off, you dont have to race to the finish line, you can get there whatever way works, the point is to get there. thats all. 

I shoot for 2 to 3 lbs a month, even tho i still have a lot to loose, because i want it to be sustainable, i want to keep it off, and i want to be able to indulge every now and then without feeling like im eating off plan or have sabotaged myself. i think its all about sustainability.

the ultimate sustainability is maintenance, so if you're gaining, i'd start there, to stop the gain, stabilize, then work towards loss again.

figure out what pushed you off the wagon and pick just one or two small steps that you can feel good about as your first goals to get you back on the wagon and moving forward again. 

good luck! you've proven you can do this thing, and you can! 

breathing... 

uugghh...

breathing...

I don't know... I have just lost the drive! 

Thanks for the suggestions... I am going to start tracking even on the off/over days.  I have not been going waaay too overboard... my excercize is down... doing just the morning wake up routing of situps and pushups... flaking on the gym and everyting else... hopefully when things settle down, I can get back into my routine... 

for some reason, I have just lost the drive to lose....? uuuggghhh....

You don't need 'drive' or 'motivation' if you think you're going to have a good time doing something.  You only need those things if you're gearing yourself up for something miserable or arduous

A good phrase I heard once was 'don't do anything in order to lose weight that you can't see yourself happily doing for the rest of your life'.  Because if you grit your teeth and do something simply to lose weight - food, exercise, anything - and then you stop doing it you will regain... stands to reason.

If you're 'flaking on the gym' maybe it's because you don't really like it all that much? (I've never seen the attraction, personally)  Maybe you need to find something that you actually enjoy and then you'd be raring to go...    How about getting a bicycle and taking regular rides around where you live, instead?  Take up golf?  Go swimming?  Take the missus dancing?  Join a badminton/tennis/hiking club?  Get involved in a local environmental project?  There are all kinds of fun & creative ways to be active that don't involve gyms. 

Food as well... if your food is flavoursome and filling at the same time as being calorie-controlled & nutritious you'll be more likely to be able to hit the level at which you can lose weight.  If you can include small amounts of old favourites in the mix, you won't feel deprived.  If your food is drab, boring or leaves you feeling hungry, on the other hand, you'll need to find other foods to make you happy.  (BTW... peg your food intake to your actual energy needs rather than to the ones you wished you had.)

Good luck... but try to look forward positively & enjoy the experience.  Then it's a lot easier to get started.

Original Post by gi-jane:

You don't need 'drive' or 'motivation' if you think you're going to have a good time doing something.  You only need those things if you're gearing yourself up for something miserable or arduous.

GI-Jane, I love that! Its so true. 

Its kind of like an adventure! I like to hunt knowledge related to my next steps. sometimes its to discover a new veggie, or try a new exercise, or . . . . whatever inspires me that week. I do research! You are very right that it does not have to be a chore. losing weight, finding health and feeling good are very liberating indeed ! 

I just remember when I needed to lose a lot of weight.... The vision stretching in front of me was one of gagging down raw celery and crispbreads, feeling perpetually hungry and being forced to go to some horrible, sweaty gym (I still never set foot in the places)   I kept deciding that, on balance, I'd rather be fat...   I think a lot of people get stuck at the same stage and come to the same conclusion.  Which is a pity.

Instead of "exercising", if you like to dance, go dancing.  If you enjoy the outdoors, go for a hike and enjoy nature.  Don't do it with the thought that you have to exercise.  Both of the above can be fun and you burn calories while you're having fun.  What can be better than that?!  Exercise can be boring, boring, boring.  So just go have some fun!

If I've lost my way, I start back by focusing on drinking water.  I change nothing else, I just drink 11-12 cups of water that day.  It helps flush out my system physically and mentally.  I then am more interested in healthy foods than in junk.

I know what it's like to be rebelling against my own plan.  For me, it's not about making the healthy plan more palatable or pleasurable - it's my ambivalence about living healthfully vs hiding from life with binge foods and inactivity.  When I recognize that I have reverted to the dubious pleasures of short-term gratification (junk food) at the expense of long-term (15 minutes from now?) gratification (healthy food and activity) - I can put on the breaks and adjust my focus to what truly makes me healthy and happy.

The answer is always the same:  It ain't Ding Dongs.

Best wishes, ballylama.  Congratulations on bringing your problem to a forum post - becoming conscious and talking about what I'm up to is the first step in stopping the madness...

I really like gi jane's posts so ready those!

I wanted to say personally when I'm losing weight, I gain some in there, too. What ends up happening is I gave my body a little boost then I lose a bunch more weight. A 3lb gain would mean something like a 5 lb loss over the next couple of weeks.

Hang in there! 30lbs is nothing to sneeze at. You've come a long way

Hang in there! Also you are not the only guy counting calories and trying to lose weight. I agree that the more you try to avoid something the harder it is to avoid. Stick with moderation and exercise. Good Luck!!

dont sweat it. i let myself indulge every so often. if i didn't, then i would have not been able to keep up with my stricter caloric intake. i think being able to eat some of the foods you like can keep you from completely breaking one day and self-sabotage. its unrealistic that you should never eat x or y ever again. dont do it to yourself. just eat in moderation. in fact, i still occasionally eat crap (brownies, pizza, chips, soda)... i just eat a lot less of it and that has worked for me. I lost around 30 pounds also (in 2 months) and im still losing weight, but at a more healthy, moderate pace now.  drink a ton (of H2O that is) and work yourself out until you get dizzy like i do or just stay outside as much as you can away from the food.

IMO

If you get to that point (respectively, the one where you are): STOP counting to LOSE, count to maintain.

Just allow yourself to maintain for a while and plateau for a bit. I know it's not what you ultimately want but: Wouldn't you rather prolong than fall off completely.

Everyone thinks of a plateau as a bad thing, however, it allows you time to adjust slowly. I figure, if you rise to the top quick, you can fall even faster.

Once you regain control... start up again.

Slow and easy buddy.

I'd have to agree with a few people on your food choices. It sounds like you are deprieving yourself of the foods you enjoy therefore you see dieting as this miserable thing you must do. Now that you've had a taste of the non-dieting world again you don't want to go back. I've been there, done that and it never works. You HAVE to eat that guilty stuff you enjoy while dieting. If you really like chocolate for an example, you must include that in your diet, but in moderate portions and in your calorie range. Every time I would diet and make myself miserable and wouldn't let myself eat ice cream or garlic bread etc I would always fail.

You only gained 3lbs on a 30lb loss... that is actually amazing! When I fall off the wagon I gain atleast 5-10lbs which trust me, is wayyy harder to pick yourself back up on. I had lost close to 30lbs as well, then I went to Hawaii and fell off the wagon for almost 3 months! I gained 10lbs and just finally got those 10lbs back off. Don't let yourself do what I did. lol Aslong as you realise that this weight gain isn't going anywhere good then I think you can stop it. Just try really hard to get back on track, when you get back on it's easy after that. Don't let that 3lbs turn into a 5lb or 10lb.