Motivation Help

Hi I thought I would start this thread because I am slipping ever so slightly.

I have been really getting weak again lately after doing real well for about 2 and 1/2 months. All this time I have resisted temptation of sweets and greasy foods in particular but I have been getting serious cravings lately. It was my birthday yesterday so I did allow myself to have a nice piece of cake.

I think I just need a little pep talk because I am starting to dip into the sweets here at work again where beofre it was so easy to resist them.  

just think how you will look ! 

That always helps motivate me. I have been working out regularly and have got back into shape pretty quickly. I have got 2/3rds of the way to my goal in less than 3 months so I need to just hang in there and keep doing what I have been doing.

Something that helped me was that after I determined my calorie allowance for the day (1,800), I went walking around CostCo for no other reason than to wander around with my wife (we paid for the membership, so why not?).  We picked out some desserts and other frozen foods just to look at the nutrition labels.

Since we already had our numbers in our minds, it helped to put things into perspective.  Like the stack of frozen hamburger patties -- I think one 1/4-lb. burger had something like 12g of saturated fat (20g being RDA for a 2,000 calorie diet).  Which meant that in my world of 1,800, RDA would have been 10.8g.

That one burger patty alone was more than my RDA of saturated fat.  I thought about all the progress I'd made so far, all the work I'd put in, the proper clothes I bought, the fact that I needed heavier dumbbells because I was getting stronger, the $130 running shoes I bought because I wore out my previous set and knew exactly what features I needed.....

Then imagined putting all of that equipment into a box and putting it beside that hamburger before tossing the equipment into a dumpster.

I thought about the 11 lbs. I'd lost over the last 2 months (the majority being in the last 3 weeks) while I was holding a package of hot dogs, and noted that one hot dog had 350 calories.

And whenever I ate hot dogs, I usually ate three at a time.  1,050 calories in one sitting (assuming that Nathan's has the same caloric content as those from CostCo).  Oh.  My.  Gawd.

So now that I understand what I was putting into myself, I got a clear picture on why I never lost weight no matter how much exercise I was doing.  I consumed too much for even my exercise to counter, and the best I could do was maintain.

That was a wake-up call.  But I need to know what my numbers were before they would make sense.

As a post-script, I just looked at Nathan's nutritional info.  The hot dog alone is 297 calories, 18 g total fat, 7 g saturated fat -- so three plus buns:

• 1,221 calories
• 58.5 g total fat
• 21 g sat. fat

And I could have that for lunch OR dinner.  Usually with 2 beers and a handful of chips along with it.

I keep m&ms in my desk drawer.  If I feel a need to have a sweet, I pop ONE in my mouth and enjoy it.  Wait.   If you want another one go for it.  You are not denying yourself a treat and but enjoying it for how nice it is to have a treat.  

Also, think about if you are really craving fat.  Choose a few macadamia nuts, chunk of cheese, flax oil, eat a healthy fat.  

Hey CJ

Well, kudos for actually saying you need some pep talks! A lot of folks, especially guys, seem to shy away from saying we need help....whether it's directions, assembling Ikea furniture or keeping up with the calorie counting (I am guilty of all three and so much more ;) )

I've got a pretty self-centric workout and calorie counting going on right now, so I can't say I have anyone there with me during workouts and such. One thing I do before any workout or at the start of my day when logging in to this site is get a mental picture of one of my long-term goals. I think I posted this elsewhere, but it could just be to fit into smaller clothing, or something as off the wall as being able to do a cartwheel with my kids someday before they outgrow wanting to do cartwheels. Point is, just setting your sights on something early in the day or before something intense like a workout really helps.

On the eating side of things, I do a lot of what crimson described. I've started to try and keep a mental rolodex of foods and types of foods. Some tidbits I've picked up on are; nuts are great, but also fatty, so snack on them in a controlled fashion, removing cheese or at least reducing how much cheese you have on sandwiches and such is a HUGE calorie saver (I found that one type of cheese I loved to munch on with crackers was 100 calories for 1 typical slice for me....and I would have about 10 slices just snacking!!!). The devil is in the details, but what really matters is becoming more aware of the food around you. One thing that has been a bit help is to think not only in daily calorie terms, but also weekly. If you have a high intake day, just take it easy the next day or split it up. In addition, if I can spare the time, I try to plan my meals for the day especially if I am going to work.

Can't say I am a pro by any means, but just chatting and sharing ideas with some of the folks on here has helped immeasurably. Beyond anything else, keeping yourself engaged in your weight loss and calorie counting is the best way to keep with it, and talking on these boards is no exception.

That exercise also feels great and causes positive neurochemical change, short and long term.  

Howdy guys,

everything your say here in the last 6 replys is very encouraging, but my question is where to your find the courage and the determination to say no! to your little voice in your head that saying Eat! Eat till hurts. I know all the stats , I know all the risks , I know I'm heading for an early grave if I dont start excercising and eating 1500-1800 cals a day, I just need something to click for me . I wish I had the magic answer, is there a magic answer.

I conquered a 23 year , pack a day smoking habit 9 years ago and that was tough, so I thought now the weight thing is going to be easy compared to the smoking thing, boy was I wrong. Help?!?

Fineline.

Original Post by bhornfineline:

Howdy guys,

everything your say here in the last 6 replys is very encouraging, but my question is where to your find the courage and the determination to say no! to your little voice in your head that saying Eat! Eat till hurts. I know all the stats , I know all the risks , I know I'm heading for an early grave if I dont start excercising and eating 1500-1800 cals a day, I just need something to click for me . I wish I had the magic answer, is there a magic answer.

I conquered a 23 year , pack a day smoking habit 9 years ago and that was tough, so I thought now the weight thing is going to be easy compared to the smoking thing, boy was I wrong. Help?!?

 

Fineline.

Hey, bro, I'm right there with you!  I was a pack-a-day smoker for 10 years and also quit about 9 years ago.  I can definitely say that weight loss is actually a little harder because eating is necessary! :)

In all seriousness, there's less social stigma associated with eating in general vs. smoking (and I'm not talking about being overweight, since that does have its own stigma).  You can eat on the bus, you can eat in a movie theater, and there aren't any anti-eating protests out there.

Unfortunately, there isn't any magic answer that works for 100% of the people 100% of the time.  You know all the theories and stats, so intellectually, you know what you have to do.

But like with quitting smoking, you gotta want it.  Every smoker knows that smoking is bad and that everyone should quit...but the reality is that it's a lot harder than that.  Recognize where the crutches are and whether you might be subconsciously making excuses.  Then, when you've accepted that you're making excuses for yourself, you can take the first steps to quitting smoking.

I think eating is much the same way.  You know what you have to do, so the trick is to actually do it.  It may be a matter of setting small, achievable goals so that you don't get discouraged.  It might start small, like quitting sodas this week.  Then next week, park further away in the parking lot, or walk to the next bus stop instead of the closest one.

If that voice in your head starts whispering "I'm hungry," stop and ask yourself whether you're really hungry, or whether you might be subconsciously bored, anxious, distracted, etc.  If it's something other than actual hunger, you can start identifying those triggers that might otherwise cause you to snack out on something bad for you.

Everyone's situation is different, so these suggestions might not work, but I think starting it out the same way applies: make small goals to start with and start actually adopting some good habits.  Trying to go all-or-nothing at once can sometimes become discouraging if there are too many things to try to do.

Hey Crimson,

Thanks for the encouraging words,  you make some excellent suggestions that really hit home with me. I really do need to learn to stop for a moment and ask myself why?!? am I going to eat this. That is the way I conquered the smoking habit, I questioned the cravings , where they were originating from and why I was reacting so weakly.

I don't think I had the courage or ambition thus far to apply this to food, maybe because I'm afraid of that fact that if I ask myself if I really need a second helping of supper I won't have a good enough reason to eat it!

I got into my gym on Sunday and went for a couple of big walks since then, I'm kinda of an " all or nothing" or " all then nothing " type of a person, I really have trouble keeping consistancy.

How about you? is your weight loss journey complete ?

Thanks for the help, I'll keep in touch.

Oh, absolutely not!  I'm one of those people who love to indulge, whether it's decadent food, a really good beer, a gourmet coffee, goose-down comforters, whatever! :)

(I'm a Taurus, what can I say?)

I have to be conscious all the time of what I eat and how much I eat.  If I don't, then it's just too easy for me to get that half-pound burger with pepper-jack cheese, bacon, and pesto.

I think it's possible to be an "all or nothing" person and still achieve the results you want by setting small goals.  Consider the "all" part as your ultimate goal, whether it's putting a halt on the cravings or losing X# lbs.  Put that at the end of a piece of paper and draw a line to it.

Along that line, draw tick marks to indicate progress.  In my case, my goal is to be at 150 lbs. (and the tools here on CC.com really do help).  I've been logging all of my food and activities almost every day so I have a record of where I've been and how far I have to go.  My first milestone was to get down to 160 lbs., and I'm not quite there yet, but it's so close I can feel it.

I had actually started at 175, and man, when I dipped below 170 for the first time in years, that was probably the best feeling and confidence boost I've had in a long time!

Little goals like that help keep you on track toward the ultimate goal.  I'm not going to be satisfied with just losing 6 lbs. when I needed to lose 25, and I'm sure you won't be either.  But losing those 6 told me that what I was doing was working, even if I couldn't actually see that beer gut of mine disappearing as fast as I would have liked.

And because I saw that what I was doing was working, because I had the visual evidence, it became easier (over time) to tell myself that while pizza tastes great, and that a 1/2-lb. bacon cheeseburger sounds fantastic right now (and it does, too!), I'm doing so well that I don't want to sabotage myself and all the work I've done for the last two months for just a half hour of satisfaction.

I've been giving it my all, so why give it up for nothing, to coin a phrase? :)

One other technique that I've found useful in terms of helpings of food is "One Less."  If it gets bad (and some days, it will -- it's not always easy to keep yourself on the right track), I will indulge.  I'll have some M&Ms or a glass of beer (not at the same time, of course).  But instead of having what I'd have normally had (an entire bag of M&Ms or four glasses of beer), I'll have "One Less" -- maybe that's 10 M&Ms, or just 2 glasses of beer.  It's not something I can do all the time, but if I do, I've scratched that itch so that it doesn't become something I dwell on until the weekend and let it completely explode uncontrollably.

Then I can just tighten up on my workouts for the next few days to make up for it, then I'm right back on track again.

Finally, what's helped me with consistency is that I've scheduled my workouts to be part of my day.  It's what I have to do, right after getting home from work.  I come home, check the mail, do some dishes, let the dog out, change into my workout clothes, let the dog back in, and go do my workout.  It's part of my routine.  I still have to find the right balance, though, because I used to do some household chores at that time, but I've slacked off on that because of my workouts.

Before, that time would just be taken up by "screw around on the Internet."  But why spend time on Facebook or playing a game when I could be having a workout?  What's better for me and my overall goals?  That's when I changed that up.

It's good to hear of your success , I can't even visualize my goal weight , I was last there in 1984,175lbs and boy , I would give anything ( well apparently not anything)to look like that one more time in my life before it's too late. I'm 47 now and it's quite a fight to get a pound in the right direction. I am very large boned ( incrediblely Doc's say) and have the slowest metabolisum known to man I'm sure. My wife and I would go out into the mountains for a 3 day weekend and hike and snowshow up thousands of feet over the couse of three days and when I got home I had gained a pound, every time. The only way my sturdy frame will give up a pound is if do cardio for weeks at atime and then only reluctantly will a pound or 2 fall off.

You sound like a very organized , dedicated person, I've always admired and desired that attribute in people ( my gal is ). I am a 1 man employer of a 15  man company and when the work day is done I go to the office and try and do admin ( yuk, I'm A.D.D I think) till all hours of the night. I not any organized driven person so everything takes me twice as long as it should.

I like your take on the all or nothing idea , my "all" is 175lbs and my nothing is where I'm at now. So I think I need to identify small move in the right direction.

Do you record everything? This is similar to tooth extraction without the freezing for me, but I must learn. I'm trying to use the calorie count feature here but it's difficult. I had an egg sandwich in the morning and  I had to add all 7 components seperately , very tedius , is that correct? How do you do it?

Do you have a strict strength and cardio plan? home gym, neighbourhood gym?

I've tried trainers but it's too expensive, and they move 2 slowly , I'm too impatient I want to look like Brad tomorrow!Chow!

FL. 

I'm organized now :)  My job had a lot to do with it, with a departmental shake-up over the last year.

I've had to get myself used to recording everything, so my meal planning does probably take twice as long if I eat something that I hadn't already recorded in the past.  It did take a while to learn that habit, to tell you the truth.  I'm so used to just grabbing ingredients and whipping up a dish without thinking about what's in it.

But like the exercising, it gets easier over time and consistently doing it.  I can estimate a tablespoon of salad dressing by eye now, for example.  I know that a slice of 12-grain bread that I use for sandwiches is 100 calories without looking it up now, so if I make a ham sandwich, it's going to be around 300 calories.  I just have to remember to record that, and the tracking records here have been a godsend.

But yeah, I definitely had to get used to it and train myself to actually do it.  It wasn't easy.

For my exercise program, I'm using P90X.  I'm on week 3 of it, and it's been working, but it's also hard work.  Both in the actual doing of the exercises, and also the after-care of recording what I've done and especially what I've eaten (P90X has a fairly strict nutrition plan).  Admittedly, it is a sacrifice, but considering that I've seen more results in the last 2.5 weeks than in the months before, I'm sold!  I was also running every day for about 3 weeks before I started P90X, so that was my cardio.  I still do that now just to keep some variety in the workout routine.  I think being led in the instructions helps a lot.

Because I've seen the results, it's been like a kickstart to keep up with the recording.  I'll admit that in the early part of this year, when I wasn't seeing any measurable progress, I was getting discouraged and was about ready to chuck it all.

I think it just comes from a reluctance to do something unpleasant.  Like our parents would hound us to do our homework or clean our rooms, we'd drag our feet.  Now, we intellectually know that the sooner we get it done, the sooner we can play.....but it emotionally doesn't make it any better! :)

We're still kids at heart, after all!

I once heard that to burn off just one M&M you have to walk 100 yards.  Interesting thought.  I like this M&M in the desk idea... I might try it.

I've just started and have SO FAR TO GO.  260 right now with goal at 171.  I'm told slow and steady and I'm trying for that.  This is only day 2 for me so I really am a dreamer at this point.  A good friend of mine who was always heavier than I was now he's lost 55 lbs since May 1st doing TOPS.  Right now I'm motivated and feeling good about it.  If I can just keep on task.  -

Good luck to you, man! Like I said above somewhere, small milestones towards your ultimate goal will keep you on track and focused.  It'll also give you small victories that help with confidence and knowing that you're doing the right thing.

It might sound like a long time to consider that it might take you the better part of a year to lose 90 lbs., but you gotta do it safely and learn good habits in the meantime.  And these milestones don't even have to be weight-related.  Anything tangible, like "I successfully ate healthy today and didn't even feel like I forced myself into it!" or "I walked an extra lap around the block because I felt too good after I was supposed to be done!"

Record your activities, too, because that gives you a baseline of achievement to beat (y'know, the basic male compulsion toward competitiveness? ).  If you did 3 laps today, shoot for 4 next time.  If you did 10 push-ups on each of three days this week, shoot for 12 for three sessions next week.

55 lbs. since May 1 is fantastic, but that rate might not be for everyone (~ 3.4 lbs/week) or indicate what really happened.  He might have lost a lot of water-weight in the beginning, then steadied out at a loss rate of 2-3 lbs./week, which is good. 

The general rule is that results won't be tangible for a few weeks at least, so by setting small goals to achieve, you don't get discouraged if you don't drop 5 pant sizes by next Tuesday ;)

Guys tend to look at the big picture rather than the details.  It's just something in our Y-chromosome, I think :)  Slow and steady is always going to be better than crash-diets or fad diets because in the big picture, any diet or procedure that advocates "eat whatever you want and melt away the pounds" will always backfire because you don't learn the good habits (which often does require some sacrifice).

Original Post by bhornfineline:

Do you record everything? This is similar to tooth extraction without the freezing for me, but I must learn. I'm trying to use the calorie count feature here but it's difficult. I had an egg sandwich in the morning and  I had to add all 7 components seperately , very tedius , is that correct? How do you do it?

 Just had this trick explained to me today.

Record those seven ingredients and amounts you added for your egg sandwich on paper. Then go to the FOOD tab at the top of this page (just to the right of COMMUNITY) and select 'New Recipes'. Enter the amount and description of each item that goes into your egg sandwich (i.e. 1 small egg' and hit 'Analyze Recipe' (you may have to edit an item or two to get green flags on all items). When you are satisfied with the result, add the new recipe to your food log giving it the description you prefer, i.e. 'My egg sandwich'. Next, tag the item from your food log so that you can retrieve it the next time.

Hope this helps take some of the tedious out of counting calories.