need some advice about obsession over weight gain

I just started my third trimester, my weight gain/loss over the course of my pregnancy has been a rollercoaster.

When I found out I was pregnant I was about 10-15 pounds heavier than normal for me at 160 pounds(I'm 5'8").  However, it was the weekend after thanksgiving---so maybe I REALLY over-indulged.  I was down to 153 around January 1st due to bad morning sickness.  I was back up to around 158 in February and just weighed myself this morning and I am at 165. 

I'm just having a super hard time seeing that number on the scale, especially since my heaviest weight ever was 164.  I understand the importance of gaining weight to the baby's development, but that makes it even more stressful. I feel stupid even complaining about this because it is so trivial and so superficial...but it is literally all I can think about.  Honestly, I just want some advice on how to get over it.  My husband is sick of it...and I guess I am too. 

Well, to a tee, you sound like me.  I'm 5'9", and started at 152 pre-pregnancy.  I peaked out a week ago at 187, so a 35 pound gain.  If you read my cc journal (you'll have to friend me, b/c most of my entries are private), all I ever did was obsess and complain about the weight gain--it's SOOOO hard to feel like you're letting yourself "go", even if it is for the good of the baby.  I think somewhere along the line, maybe when I hit 180 pounds, I just let it go.  I had to.  And then, last week, I had the little wee baby, and 8 days post-delivery, I'm already down to 167, so I've lost an incredible 20 pounds in a week!!!!  I'll try not to tell you "don't fret", because I know how impossible it is to watch the scale.  I will tell you though, that you can get your body back (I believe, anyway!), and that the gain is totally worth it in the end.  You get a BABY out of it.  Truly amazing.

i am early in the weight gain department, but already very aware. i am only 7 weeks, but have gained 5 pounds! it isn't just the weight, but how poorly i am eating. i have pretty severe nausea all day long, so when i actually think of something that sounds appealing - i eat it. unfortunately that is mostly toast and crackers (hello carbs!). i also am too nauseous to go to the gym. i hope this will all pass soon so i can start feeling good about myself again.

don't worry too much about the scale. try to focus on healthy eating and happy baby! Congrats!

Hi Vit; I just started my thrid trimester too.  When are you due?  I am due July 20th.  I'm very excited.  Last time I went to the doc I gained a whopping 11 pounds in one month.  It's gotten to the point that I fear getting on the scale and peek out of closed eyes!!  I lost weight before I got pregnant; but gained it all back the first six months of my pregnancy.  Not happy.  So; I'm trying to be proactive about it-  I ordered a pre-natal Pilates DVD that I'm going to start doing; and I do cave into the cravings; but not as bad as I could; or have.  I try to replace the panic fat thoughts with OMG, I'm going to have so much fun with this baby!!  It seems to help.  And; I'm going to give myself 1 year to really dedicate to my pregnancy weight loss.  You don't sound stupid at all-  you sound human.  But please eat-  you need to for the baby. 

I think it is a natural thing for women to always wonder what that scale says. When I went to my last visit I gained 2 pounds but lost 7 from the morning sickness. I am now in my 5th month and have an appointment in one week and am dreading the normal scale weigh in at the office. I have had two children before so I know it comes on and goes back off, but I can't just get past the fact that I am going to gain weight again. I gained 40 lbs with my first and 28 lobs with my second. I do eat but I joined this site to help me maintain a healthy pregnancy and gain weight because I am pregnant not because I want to eat everything in site. I do eat whatever I want I just do in moderation now. So you are not crazy or weird, I think it is just in our nature to not want to gain weight. PS- the skinny models you see everywhere really don't make it easier. So I just have to tell myself if they were pregnant they would not look like that either. Hope this helps a little.

I feel so much better...thank you for the awesome responses.

Machatica:  congrats on the baby boy!  I can't believe you lost 20 pounds right away...I mean they say that is what happens but I have a hard time believing that.  reading your journal helped a lot, I'm not so crazy after all...

sunquest: I was the same way..I lived on ginger ale and soda crackers for at least two months...and I couldn't motivate my lazy butt to get to the gym because I was so sick!  I slowly stopped feeling so sick around the end of my 4th month...so there is an end in sight!

vanessa: Well my due date is a whole story in itself...it has changed three times over the course of my pregnancy!  Right now they are saying July 10th!  We're pretty close!  Cravings...oh lord...I hated those chocolate pre-packaged doughnuts before pregnancy and I ate a whole bag of them in two days last week...I keep thinking...LOOK WHAT I HAVE BECOME...watching tv and eating a bag of gross doughnuts! haha  I like your idea of giving yourself a year to deal with the weight...I think part of the reason I am so nervous is because my brother is getting married August 10th...yeah exactly 4 weeks after my due date.  Hopefully I can be like Machatica from above and lose 20 pounds right away! Best of luck with everything...I have to do my glucose testing today---and I am SO NOT EXCITED ABOUT IT!  Have you done yours yet?

henthorn:  thank you so much for your kind words!  I am glad it is not just me that get so mad about those pregnancy models!  I mean come on...it's so obvious that they just stick a rubber belly on them it's rediculous...what are they trying to do?  oh and what about all these pregnant celebrities...why do none of them look like stumpy waddling bowling balls?

Again, thank you so much for all of your responses...I feel much more relaxed about this now.  I am just going to enjoy in moderation...and try not to gasp when I see that scale!

vitenser - don't take this the wrong way, but regarding your brother's wedding - people won't be looking at you! They'll be engrossed by the beautiful baby you'll be holding!

And one more - I +++ the comments on the pregancy models. And I think the reason we never see celebs looking uncomfortably pregnant is that they don't go out after 6 mos!

you are totally right finnsal...thank you for the slap back to reality! I agree about the celebs...i think i should go into hiding now...

hi vitenser-  I just took my glucose test.  It came back fine.  But the orange drink was GROSS.  I'm having major swelling issues today and had to take all my jewelry off.  Here's to gross donuts-  the hard chocoate ones with the yellow cake inside-  yep I ate the ON THE WAY HOME FROM THE STORE!!!!!  LOL.  If I can jst get rid of this horrible bloating!!!!!!

haha vanessa...for the first time in my life I opened something up in the grocery store and started eating them...and it was those dang doughnuts!  I have been retaining water lately too...not so bad that my rings have had to come off yet (my wedding ring is big to begin with, thank god!)  but my ankles are really sore and big at the end of the night.  I woke up screaming two nights ago because of a horrible charlie horse in the world...my husband thought I was crazy because I started screaming and flopping around like a fish in bed.  I swear I have never felt something like that before in my life...and I was a college athlete!  I guess taking calcium supplements helps...and so far I haven't gotten another one.  Oh joy to pregnancy and all the weird things that come along with it! 

Original Post by vitenser:

you are totally right finnsal...thank you for the slap back to reality! I agree about the celebs...i think i should go into hiding now...

 Or just hire a look alike like Paris Hilton does - a skinny chick with a huge purse and giant sunglasses. Strap one of those fake little baby bumps on her, and get her to parade around your neighbourhood for you!

OMG vitenser I just spit my water out laughing so hard at your post-  i'm sorry about the charlie horse; I've been getting them too and I make these strange howling sounds that my husband runs away from LOL...they really hurt!!  well; havm't touched the donuts but I ate fast food this weekend against my better judgement and it tasted sooooooooo  good.  but I paid for the salt.  I'm just drinking and peeing; that's all I seem to do!!!!  I hope I never get stuck on the subway-  I'd be in big trouble!!!!

I started getting the braxton hicks-  i make my husband feel my lower stomach becuase it gets soo hard-  like when your foot cramps up and is stiff as a board!

have you registered for lamaze or a birthing class?  I just did.  I think i'm a little late; but oh well!!

I haven't registered for anything yet.  I think I am being a little stubborn about all of it.  I have gotten some weird and opinionated advice from almost everyone around me...which has forced me to just try to figure things out on my own.  I've been reading like a crazy person...and I guess I feel like reading about it is just as good as going to the classes!  My husband and I are going to take a hospital tour in the next few weeks though...otherwise he will stress me out too much becuase he will be anxious about not knowing where we are going!  I don't think I have had any braxton hicks...honestly my belly always feels stiff and hard so I am not sure I would even notice!  I ate fast food yesterday....I had a taco bell craving...WHAT WAS I THINKING!  I don't like taco bell at all...not even a  little bit...but I just had to have it!  Hope you have a good rest of your week!