need to help my brother.. advice please :)

so due to the fact that ive been on this lifestyle change for so long, i cant seem to help my brother start. I eat totally separate meals from my family ..and the biggest issue is the AMOUNT we eat, more than the nutrition.

Hes 18 years old, 6'1 and 270 pounds!! He sits home all day playing video games and watching tv and eats everything in sight! I cant even believe the amount of food that he eats. Of course I understand that hes a growing teenager boy so its natural for him to eat a lot. But he keeps gaining wait and Im worried that if he continues like this hes just going to get bigger and bigger. More so, if he doesnt do something now that he is young ..its going to cause big health problems soon. (both to his self esteem and physically)

Hes told me that he wants to lose some weight and asked for my advice (since im his older sister and have lost weight).

I think whats best for him is to start with small goals each week and then move on from there... because telling him to exercise and count calories from the get-go is just way too overwhelming.

Any advice or ways that I can help him start would be greatly appreciated :)

thanks guys!

It's difficult to say what would work.  I think education about diets, the effects of foods, etc would be a very good place to start.   There are tons of books about dieting and diets in general.. not sure which one to recommend.  I am currently reading Good Calories, Bad Calories by Gary Taubes but the book is pretty dry and probably not a good starting point for an 18 year old.   Maybe you could search the forums for threads about books and go from there.

Realistically he is going to have to get to a point where enough is enough and he wants to get healthy.  It's nice to say 'yeah I want to lose weight' but we all know that such ideals usually fall to the background and are put off indefinitely.   When he gets to the 'Im going to do this no matter what' point, he'll need to learn how to do it which is why I was recommending books.

Practical advice.. have healthy quick options readily available.  Buy a ton of vegetables and fruits and cut them up ready to eat in the fridge so that he could grab them quickly instead of a bag of chips.   Try replacing the normal things he eats with healthier alternatives.    Advise him to go for a walk once a day for at least 30 minutes.  

Eventually the idea will be to eliminate processed foods, avoid highly caloric and high sugar foods, eat low on the food chain -- fruits, vegetables, healthy proteins.   Once he gets into it, tracking calories and progress on a site such as this is a good idea too.

One of the most notable things people often post about losing weight is that it really didn't take that much of a change of habits to get into eating healthy.  That's a point I would press with him -- change a few things here and there and food will start working for him instead of against him.

Good luck and congratulations with your own success :)

No offense intended, but if your brother can't be bothered to come in here and ask his own questions and do his own research, I'd suspect he'll have trouble being disciplined enough to make much of a difference in his life.  People have to be willing to make an effort of some sort.  Asking you for advice is a pretty minimal attempt. 

Having said that, when I started making changes, the first thing I did was start an activity.  For me, it was swimming.  3x a week, started with 20 minutes and worked up to 45 to an hour.  For him, maybe walking, maybe riding a bike, maybe swimming.  Whatever he likes.  But something away from the TV/video games.

Also, start by cutting out the obvious crap out of his diet.  Pop is a good starting point, if he drinks a lot of that.  Replace it with water.  Try to replace some of the junky snacks with fruit or something.  Don't start necessarily with calorie counting, but do some of the obvious ones.  Get him to start just by tracking what he's eating, if you can.  Not working out the exact quantities and calories, but at least what it was he ate.

And if your brother is serious about it, get him to make his own account here.  He can ping me, if he likes... I'd be happy to answer questions if he makes that first step, and I promise to be nice.  :)  I started off back in March as a sedentary desk-job type person, and I've dropped 34 pounds since then by getting active and changing my diet.  I'm now swmming, biking, and running, and have a triathlon scheduled in less than 3 weeks.  I'm quite a bit older (41) than he is, but hey, he should have an easier time of it than me because of that! :)

Clint

okay so i just went with him and signed him up for the YMCA and hes determined to go everyday.  I made him realize today that the eating patterns that he has today lead to weight gain for the rest of his life and unless he changes his habits hes going to continue to gain weight. (opened his eyes a bit)

i told him all he has to do is make one small change every week. I told him he can eat whatever he wants this week BUT he has to write EVERY single bite down on a piece of paper, along with no eating after 7 pm.

He wrote down his breakfast today (wasnt pretty lol) ..

thanks guys for the advice! I just needed some "guys" opinions ..but from reading your posts i had a huge flashback to when i started.

He knows its not healthy and im not sure tehres not much you can do or say.


Im 28 years old and was over weight pretty much since i was 11 or 12 and i knew that it was bad and i had my diets here and there.

Didnt matter untill i was realy rdy if anyone would of said anything to me i would of just ingored them .


Just keep doing what your doing and be a good example.

My Dad has been over weight and hes seen me lose all this weight and nows hes trying to do it just because he seen me do it.
I never said anything bad about his weight only thing i have told my dad is to quit the cokes and sugar foods because he has diabetes.

Original Post by loseweight1234:

okay so i just went with him and signed him up for the YMCA and hes determined to go everyday.  I made him realize today that the eating patterns that he has today lead to weight gain for the rest of his life and unless he changes his habits hes going to continue to gain weight. (opened his eyes a bit)

i told him all he has to do is make one small change every week. I told him he can eat whatever he wants this week BUT he has to write EVERY single bite down on a piece of paper, along with no eating after 7 pm.

He wrote down his breakfast today (wasnt pretty lol) ..

thanks guys for the advice! I just needed some "guys" opinions ..but from reading your posts i had a huge flashback to when i started.

 

 That's a GREAT start!  One of the best things you can do for him right now (in my opinion) is going with him to the Y for the next 2 or 3 weeks.  There's going to be days when he just doesn't feel like going, and having a buddy to go with can be the difference between laying on the couch or going to the gym.  It's much harder to tell someone else that you're not going.

What's he going to do at the Y?  Weights?  Cardio?  Sit there and look at the girls in spandex? :)

Once you get him to log his food for a week, I'd go over the list with him, and if you see any pattern of unhealthy eating, pick a couple of those and get a substitute.  Each week, knock off a couple of the worst offenders, and gradually change his diet.  The suggestion someone made about pre-packaging snacks is a great idea... I think sometimes it's as much the convenience of junk food as it is the taste.

Clint

I have an overweight 19 year old niece, she & I decide we had had enough! But she lacks motivation so what I did was started talking to her about how the body works, water vs coke/juice, food calories, and I printed out common foods calories that she eats along with visual portion sizes, ultimately I had to put all the articles I printed for her in a binder. I put tabs in the binder to make it reader friendly. It contains a full listing of calories for every fast food place she likes to eat plus foods from home. It also has exercise instructions for every part of the body, and articles on how the body works.

Does she read it? Not really that’s why I talk to her about it & share everything I learn with her. I feel like if you know exactly what the consequences are you will at least think twice about it.

I take her to the gym with me (about 3 times a week) have her do cardio & weights.

She has lost 25 lbs and I think 19 inches since Feb. Well her loss has stalled so now I’m really pushing her to count her calories, she logs her food in fitday along with her activities & it gives her her calorie balance. I also created a spreadsheet for her to keep track of calories in vs calories out (from the calorie balance). Which I’m going to use myself! At the end of the week she will be able to see her calorie deficit for the entire week, and that should reflect her loss. Crossing fingers hoping this will work.

 Good luck to you & your nephew!

id say try to enroll him in a summer sport.  he'll lose weight and be more healthy and not even realize it.

also--he's 18!  that means a ton of his friends/kids in the neighborhood are probably outside playing bball right now, or even baseball.  get him to join his friends when they're playing. 

I was in a pretty similar situation as your brother, I'm male, 17 yo, 6', and was 250 lbs.  The thing that really helped me was I met this cute funny girl, who was very thin and fit, and we enjoyed spending time with each other, but when I asked her out she said no because I was overweight.  For me that was the "enough is enough" point and I've since lost 19 lbs, it's only a start but it's something.  This website has helped me a lot and if he really wants to lose weight I don't think counting calories is too overwhelming, it's just useful.  If he wants to make an account on here I'd be glad to be his weight loss buddy.  Good luck with your brother, and congratulations on your weight loss.