New Kitten..help!

So..this is my second kitten. My first kitten (now a cat..) is at my moms. When I got her she took to me immediatly. Let me hold her, slept with me, and ect.

THIS CAT...at first it wouldnt come near me at all. Now it will lay on my arm sometimes..but it wont let me pick her up. It always runs from me when I come towards it. It wont lay on my chest at all..but it will let me pet her if she comes to me.

Is it just gonna take a bit longer for her to bond with me or am I doing something wrong. I dont want her to run from me forever!

Every cat is different.  Some are little love bugs, some are incredibly shy.  Does this cat have any history?  Walking towards the cat is somewhat threatening...try staying still and calling the cat to come to you with a treat or food.  When petting the cat, don't go directly over the head, put your hand out below the chin and see if the cat rubs against your fingers...from there you can loop around the back of the neck to the ears.  Under the chin, lightly behind the ears, the base of the tail and the spine....all good cat spots.  If your cat is a bit skittish, pay a lot of attention to what s/he likes or dislikes when you're petting instead of absent minded petting.

I have 2 cats- totally different from each other. My first cat, (5 years old) Shadow lovesss to be touched and always drops down on the ground on her back with paws in the air, waiting to be petted. I've had her since she was a few weeks old after weaning.

My other cat, Banjo, however is somewhat skittish and easily startled (I've had him for over 3 years now since he was 3 months old) so I usually call him by having treats and leaving my hand out for him to rub against then from there, it's all good. I also am careful when touching him while he's sleeping so not to startle him. I always wonder if he would be like this had I got him as a baby like Shadow.

One thing I think is odd, though- Shadow does not take to new people easily while Banjo is very friendly with new people, ha.

Just for clarification- is the second feline a kitten or a cat because you say CAT in the second paragraph while title says new kitten? Sometimes that can make a difference. Give her time and space to warm up to you. :)  

Do you ever wear glasses around the kitten?  I have noticed that my cats don't like it when I wear glasses or when people wearing glasses come into the house.  They run away - I think it's to do with the reflection or the fact that it magnifies their eyes and looks threatening.  Just a thought.

I have 2 cats, one of which runs away if I try to pick her up but has started to come to me if I sit still and basically ignore her.  She will sit on my lap for a long time now whereas a few months ago (when we got her from the RSPCA) she wouldn't.

I think it's going to take patience and you may have to accept that she is happy as she is and is not a cuddly cat - or she may just be a bit scared at the moment.  She will develop her own personality as she grows, just like us all!

Are you planning on both cats living together at any time?

Sounds like my Jasmine (see picture!). This new kitten is also getting used to her new environment. The fact that she does come up to you and "let" you pet her is a good sign. It definitely might take a while for her to get completely used to you. Though she might never let you pick her up!

When I got Jasmine she was 8 months old and never had a steady household. She wasn't abused, but she never received the amount of attention and care she needed to really make strong bonds. She liked me from the start, though--at the kennels she came right up to me and wanted my attention. When I got her home, she hid for about a week behind the couch. She slowly started coming up to me, and after a couple of weeks was laying in my lap. She's no longer afraid of people, though she doesn't hang around long once she's sniffed them. She still won't let me hold her for more than a minute or two (I've been working with her on that for over a year--and she's gotten better! but she won't let anyone else but me even attempt to pick her up).

Now, my new kitten Cosmo? He'll come right up to you and practically jump into your arms. =P She'll become attached to you, even if it doesn't seem that way.

I have 9 cats and each one of them are different. I have 2 kittens and their mom, let me tell you the Missy (mom) and Boogie are the biggest mushes and lovers. Milo (boogies brother) is hysterically scared of everyone. Now Ive had them since birth and I held both all the time when they were little. When they were babies Milo would always cry when I held him, no matter what. Milo now will run away but every once in a while on a good day he will come over to be pet only if one of the other cats are there being pet then he'll butt in.

She will warm up too you. Make sure she see you put food down and when she is eating give her a pet on the head. Let her know who is there for her.

Edit: also an ice breaker are toys. Get a multipack of bell balls and mice, a toy on a string and a laser pointer. see which she likes

I really wanted Moon. My son was at his grandfather's house in WA. I texted him and asked if he cared if I brought another kitten home and sent him a picture. I brought her home and she was a little wild and skittish. She was with just me and my mother for several days until J came home. She would come up to both of us, but would also run away easily.

J came home and she took to him immediately. She slept on his head. She would run to him and climb up his body to his shoulder and sit there while he walked around the house. She would barely let me pick her up. She basically ignored me and my mother. She would sit in mom's lap occasionally. She never ever once purred for me.

Then ... J went to college. She was about 16 months old. After about 2 weeks of J not being around at all and mom was now at nursing home, she started to sleep on my bed with the other 2 cats. Then one afternoon she actually sat next to me on the couch and let me pet her and started to purr. I remember calling J and telling him that his cat actually sat in my lap and purred. He couldn't believe it.

J didn't come home for the first time until about 8 weeks had passed. Moon ran from him. She was mad. She wouldn't go near him. She'd sit and look at him and then run off. She has never really forgiven him for breaking her heart. Now when he comes to visit she'll warm up to him after 24 hours, but it's not the same.

She will come jump in my lap now. I can even call her over and ask her to come see me and she will. She purrs for me regularly. I wake up at night and she'll have her body stretched all along me.

^aww thats too cute. My brother moved across the country and he was taking his cat Slappy with him. Hes had her since she was a kitten. Well I spent most of my time with her and let her sleep on my neck or Id lay down and nap with her when I was home with school. Well anyway the day he was leaving I picked her up to say bye and she was in a mood and wouldnt cuddle me like she usually would. She just pushed her upper body away from me. It was so sad. Now when I visit she is her old self and I carry her every where w. me.

Thanks for all the advice and making me feel better. I thought my cat hated me, haha.

Well good news though. When I woke up this morning her personality totally changed. She meows whenever i leave the room..and she comes up to me to be pet for ever and letsm e pick her up now. We even napped today. She was on my neck while i was lying down.

Maybe she just needed the night to cuddle with me to start trusting me.

She's so silly though. I bought her SO many toys and she only plays with a pen she found on the floor and chases her tail..lol. She will chase her tail for like 10 minutes.

I just got a kitten too :)

My cat who is about 4.5 years old, and we got her when she was like 4 weeks old. She is SO anti social! With this kitten I see now how loving they can be compared to her.

She almost never is even near me (my grown cat). She grumbles if I pick her up. she only is nice to me if she thinks i will give her food.

But if I dont feel well she will lay at the head of the bed next to me. also, I can almost always pick her up and make a kissy sound and she will give me a quick tiny lick and grumble and squirm to get down.

They sure are all different! This new kitten cries if she wakes up without me and will cry and track me through the house so i will pick her up and she can fall asleep!

Original Post by se1289:

Thanks for all the advice and making me feel better. I thought my cat hated me, haha.

Well good news though. When I woke up this morning her personality totally changed. She meows whenever i leave the room..and she comes up to me to be pet for ever and letsm e pick her up now. We even napped today. She was on my neck while i was lying down.

Maybe she just needed the night to cuddle with me to start trusting me.

She's so silly though. I bought her SO many toys and she only plays with a pen she found on the floor and chases her tail..lol. She will chase her tail for like 10 minutes.

 

 ahaha its always the cheap toys. shipping boxes and balls of paper are my cats favorite. Also there is the laser light addiction.

Original Post by gem86:

Original Post by se1289:

Thanks for all the advice and making me feel better. I thought my cat hated me, haha.

Well good news though. When I woke up this morning her personality totally changed. She meows whenever i leave the room..and she comes up to me to be pet for ever and letsm e pick her up now. We even napped today. She was on my neck while i was lying down.

Maybe she just needed the night to cuddle with me to start trusting me.

She's so silly though. I bought her SO many toys and she only plays with a pen she found on the floor and chases her tail..lol. She will chase her tail for like 10 minutes.

 

 ahaha its always the cheap toys. shipping boxes and balls of paper are my cats favorite. Also there is the laser light addiction.

My cat sa bit too skiddish to play with anything that moves, haha..except her sister. She is the alpha female in that relationship. She's really loving towards humans..but if you move to fast around her suddenly..she jumps..and if you try to play with her with like a string on a stick..she is like uhh no. I even tried the laser light and she didnt acknowledge it at all

Original Post by se1289:

She's so silly though. I bought her SO many toys and she only plays with a pen she found on the floor and chases her tail..lol. She will chase her tail for like 10 minutes.

 

 Glad to hear it OP. Yeah, we have 3 cats and they are all into different toys (or one cat is really not into any toys at all). Once you know more what she's into you can get her more toys (homemade toys are most of our cats' favorites!).