Do "Normal" People Count Calories??

As someone who has suffered through disordered eating and ED behaviors for the past 10 years, I have always wondered if thin people count calories.  My mother always counted calories (possible paving the way for my disordered eating/thinking???).  Is it "normal" to be so conscious of what you are eating all the time and how many calories it has? Frankly, I am pretty damn tired of knowing how many calories every morsel that I put in my mouth contains. All of my friends with "normal" eating behaviors and healthy weights swear they don't count calories- but somehow I have trouble believing that you can be a healthy weight and not be aware of calories!

People (like me) who have been overweight in the past and had to control their food intake to lose weight find we need to 'watch what we eat' to a certain extent.  We either manage our portions quite carefully (my chosen method) or we might spot-check the calories.  People who have been underweight for whatever reason and had to control their food intake to gain will find they are more portion/calorie conscious.  Few people in either camp count religiously day in day out.... that's far from 'normal'.    'Calorie counting is a good servant but a bad master'

People who have never had a weight-problem are usually that way because they can self-regulate reasonably well.  They tend to eat a littel more if they're hungry, eat less if they're not and they also tend to be pretty active which picks up the slack.  It won't be a conscious thing on their part and, if they're under 30, that also helps a lot!   They might weigh themselves every so often or cut back a little if they feel their clothes getting tighter but, your friend is right, they really don't count the calories.

Believe...

There's all kinds of normal. I'm in my early forties, and I've just begun counting calories. I never did it before and tuned out those around me who were doing it. I was at a stable, healthy weight (120-130, 5'7'') for decades simply because I like healthy food and I hate the feeling of being overfull. Lots of activity, too.  The few times my clothes got tight, I realized that a particular change in my eating habits was causing the gain and reversed it. Also, until recently, I haven't been an emotional eater or very rarely, anyway. I've only started counting now because life is very stressful at the moment, and this is a concrete way to keep myself eating carefully. But I do plan to jettison it as an everyday activity as soon as everything in my closet fits again.

I do wish you good luck with finding a way to eat healthily and with pleasure instead of constant worry and self-scrutiny. I know I did, and I plan to again soon!    

I guess it depends who it is i have family who are trying to lose weight and count , my mum doesent count but restricts herself from eating alot of snacks, but you should see my brothers they dont bother at all i even had to explain to him the calorie consept and hes 27. I guess what works for me , i mean if you need to count to make sure you are having enough and not slipping back , but id love to be at the stage where i could just eat what i want and maintain my weight at a healthy range .

"I have trouble believing that you can be a healthy weight and not be aware of calories!"

Being AWARE and being obsessed or counting every calorie are totally different things. I think most of us become aware of calories more after at one point being avid calorie counters. Maintainers are probably better adjusted to deal with finding the balance, visit their threads and you may find more helpful info.

hi run4eva,

I am at a healthy weight and have never been under or over weight my entire life. I am VERY conscious of my calories. Almost to a point that I think its unhealthy. I certainly do wish that I could forget and not think about the intake every single day, but I cant. Its always with me. I dont know if you would consider me "normal" but I can tell you its not just those with EDs that think about calories all the time.

Interesting replies...thanks.  I have always been obsessed with food- even as a little girl.  I love to eat!  I eat when I am happy, I eat when I am sad- I never miss a meal! I guess part of my disordered thinking is feeling shame in the way I feel about food.  I am just so sure that if I did not calorie count and was not aware of what I put in my mouth, I would become overweight.

My father, who is now 91 years old, has always been slim and has never counted calories.  I am sure he wouldn't have any idea of how to.  But he doesn't "love food".  He eats when he is hungry, stops when he is full.  A bowl of soup is his idea of a great lunch.  He has never seen the inside of a gym, but until recently he took walks at least once a day and worked around the yard.  I so wish I could be like him, but I had to take after my mother instead. 

Original Post by iine:

There's all kinds of normal. I'm in my early forties, and I've just begun counting calories. I never did it before and tuned out those around me who were doing it. I was at a stable, healthy weight (120-130, 5'7'') for decades simply because I like healthy food and I hate the feeling of being overfull. Lots of activity, too.  The few times my clothes got tight, I realized that a particular change in my eating habits was causing the gain and reversed it. Also, until recently, I haven't been an emotional eater or very rarely, anyway. I've only started counting now because life is very stressful at the moment, and this is a concrete way to keep myself eating carefully. But I do plan to jettison it as an everyday activity as soon as everything in my closet fits again.

I do wish you good luck with finding a way to eat healthily and with pleasure instead of constant worry and self-scrutiny. I know I did, and I plan to again soon!    

Thanks for posting this, it's good to know that one day all this 'control' wont be necessary.  If I work hard, learn new habits and coping strategies for stress  hopefully I will be able to give up counting calories.

(I'm also an emotional eater - I don't even like chocolate, but stuff my face right now if I'm stressed).

I think there's a big difference between counting calories and being aware of calories. I think most everyone is AWARE of the calories they are taking in, and healthy people are healthy because of it. But they may not COUNT them with the fervor we NEED to count them with.

Anyone can count calories, regardless. I think this includes thin people.

You dont have to count calories to eat proper portions of high value foods, and build healthy eating habits around them.  It does though help to count calories while you 'train' yourself to do that.  How else can you know what a proper portion is, or which foods are high value?  I dieted many times as a kid and teen, reaching goal weight each time.  Then I managed to maintain through my 20's and 30's.  All without counting calories.  Now that I am 40's, and quit smoking, I need to relearn a few things about how mid-life me needs to eat.  But I know I wont need to count forever, just until I form those good habits again.

Original Post by gi-jane:

'Calorie counting is a good servant but a bad master'

     I love this!

OK, I apologise in advance for the long post, but this is a subject I have strong feelings about.

Calories are a very abstract unit. After all, all they represent is how much of one substance needs to be burned in order to produce enough heat to raise the temperature of one cubic millilitre (or one litre, seeing as we all think in kilo-calories) of water by one degree centigrade at one atmospheric pressure.

Given how removed this is from real food and real eating, I don't think one  needs to be aware of calories, and I think there are many advantages to not being aware.

For example, a person could be perfectly healthy knowing only that they needed to base their diet around whole grains, fruits and vegetables, with some protein and a moderate amount of fat. If a person is eating well and listening to their hunger and fullness signals, it's not rocket science to maintain a healthy weight and body. Taking time to eat, enjoying food and letting food be a pleasure but not a salve is so important in getting back to a good relationship with food.

I feel strongly that as society moves into a faster-paced life, we have forgotten what food should be about. Food has come to mean processed convenience, packaged corn-syrup snacks and a remedy to emotional emptiness, anxiety or frustration. The more disconnected we become from real food and real eating experiences, the more warped our relationship with food becomes. We have a strange dichotomy of the dual epidemics of eating disorders and obesity, and yet fewer and fewer people who actually have healthy relationships with food.

Instead of reconnecting with good, wholesome food and learning to slow down and enjoy eating, we've instead learned to 'control' food by measuring it with calories. This hasn't served to fix anything: it hasn't reduced either eating disorders or obesity. Instead, it's just disconnected us further from food. Again, a calorie is a mathematical unit, not a real measurement of the nutritional value or pleasure a food can give us. Olive oil, fresh butter, nuts, seeds and dried fruit might all be considered 'failures' under the concept of calories, whereas sugar-free, fat-free, flavour-free diet products are sure to sell.

To sum all of that up, I think counting calories can sometimes be a symptom of an unhealthy disconnection from food which takes away from the pleasure of eating and also fails to take health into account. Don't get me wrong - I have spent years counting calories and I can see their usefulness for weight loss and weight gain. But as I have begun maintaining my weight I am learning to eat intuitively and I can eat now without counting calories, by paying attention to what my body needs and what I really feel like eating. It is hard to stop counting calories, but it's not impossible, and for me at least it has been totally worth the effort.

When you talk about "normal" people I tend to think of people who don't appear to think about what they eat. I used to think my boyfriend was like that, before we started dating. He's been skinny all of his life, and even now when he claims to be "the heaviest he's ever been", his BMI is 22.

Then I found out that while he has no clue how many calories are in a certain food, or even that he shouldn't be eating deep-fried stuff everyday, he regulates what he eats. If he has a huge unhealthy dinner one night he'll eat less for a few days afterwords to compensate.

It makes me think that skinny people that don't appear to calorie count still control their eating, even if it isn't necessarily on a conscious level.

My mom has always counted calories and carbs so that she knows what insulin to take.  I didn't know what a calorie really was until I was over 30...never had an eating disorder or any history with them.  I didn't have any weight issues (typical teen image issues but in retrospect I was not chubby) until I started cooking for myself.  In my 20s I put on a couple of pounds a year but still didn't count calories.

No, normal people do not count calories. I think a percentage of the urbanised population of industrialised communities count calories because we are so inherently detached and alienated from all natural acts that we can't function without constant supervision lest we starve or gorge our senses in a myriad of destructive ways.

i like this board for the chat but i do not use it to count calories. i just can't, it would drive me insane to do so. thats why something like weight watchers, with points and everything, was something i could never follow. i maintain my weight with exercise and watching what i eat. i do indulge every now and then but not every day.

I'm a numbers geek, I like to count in general: However, since I also teach group fitness (cardio) and lift, I'm always telling people that eating is 80% of the process. I realized I planned my workouts (10%) better than I planned my eating. Thus I figured I should plan eating as well as or better than workouts (I eat much more than I exercise). This is how I rationalize.

If normal = the majority, & the majority of americans are over weight, then it's normal to be over weight, & if one needs to count calories b/c one is over weight, then it becomes normal to count cals. It's simple logic :-)

Merylwhite1- I absolutely agree with your breakdown of idustrialized society's warped view on food.  I don't think the obesity epidemic would exist if we were all "intuitive" eaters who ate simply to fuel our bodies and took pleasure in the taste of raw, natural foods.  Unlike our ancestors, we have a choice about whether or not we want to eat chicken or beef.  If you want cake and ice cream for dinner, its not that difficult to satisfy your urge.  As a nurse (and other nurses can back me up on this) I can walk into my place of employment on any given day and find a host of sugary, fatty treats that I can easily pop into my mouth for free. I just think that unless you are a super controlled person, or a person who does not care one way or the other about food, counting calories just might be necessary to maintain a healthy weight. 

I am in a healthy weight range and have never been overweight or underweight. I do not count calories, except for maybe once a month when I'm just curious how much I'm actually consuming. 

However, I do try to eat healthy and make smart decisions when it comes to food. I honestly would rather choose some organic, whole food that is higher in calories than some processed "diet" food that is less in calories. I'm a big believer in whole, natural foods, and when I am trying to lose a few pounds, I just try to eat as many whole foods as possible. 

With that being said, I don't think it's bad to count calories as long as it's short-term. If someone is grossly overeating or grossly undereating and not realizing it, well then counting calories is probably necessary at least for a little while. But I think eventually it's important for you to learn how to eat without the help of counting calories. You will eventually need to learn how to listen to your body and eat when you're truly hungry. 

Good luck :) :)