Note to parents of young kids, try to get some control - please.

I am getting SO annoyed of everywhere my husband and I go - to eat, to shop, to the movies, etc. kids are just out of control.

They are running, jumping, whining, begging, throwing things, screaming,

just make them stop. We were at a nice restaurant celebrating our anniversary and the kids in the next booth were standing up blowing soda at us through their straws! The parents thought they were cute.

They might be precious to you, but they are becoming annoying to others.

There, now I feel better.

I SECOND that!!!!

So I was at church the other day and this kid was just hollering, and not screaming but that yelling where they just want to hear their own voice (probably age 1-2 ish). At my church they actually have  a place for you to take your hollering kid, but they didn't budge <-- and these weren't new member they know we have a bernie room(that's what we call it).

As a mom of a 2 year old I completely agree!  There is no way that I would allow my daughter to behave that.  My daughter will ask why other children are being naughty, I tell her their parents are being naughty for letting them behave that way.

Thank you leanne. The photo of you and your little girl is darling. It must be very difficult to parent these days with so many distractions in the world, so much "stuff" kids are bombarded with.

My husband and I always comment to parents that are doing a good job when we see them in public.

I started very young with my kids and took them to restaurants(I don't like the fast food places).  It comes down to saying NO to your children.  My kids are now 13 & 15 and there are kids their age that I would like to strangle because they were never told NO.

I totally agree...we started taking the kids out to eat with us when they were babies (ok, went out for Chinese the day I left the hospital with our first :-) )

From babies they can learn how to behave.  My kids are not perfect, but I could always take them to any situation and not be ashamed (ok there was that 1 funeral -but besides that) They were taught to behave and obey!

I live in a country where it is the norm to raise your children to express themselves and not put any "mental restraints" on them.  Now while I don't believe in stifling children I do think there is a difference between that and letting them run riot...it drives me CRAZY!!.  I think it says a lot about the general respect you have for your fellow man!

 

 

I don't have kids of my own yet, but if I had acted the way I see kids act, my mother would have taken me into the restroom to spank my little bottom!  I know, she actually did once.  When we came out, people applauded, I was more mortified from that than from the spanking... I NEVER acted out in public again! 

Blowing soda at you? I hope you took the parents to task for it. Two weeks ago I had a kid kicking my seat in the theater and asked nicely twice for her to stop, the dad thought it was funny till the third time when I turned around and told him if she kicks my chair again I am kicking him. It stopped. 

 

Original Post by strawberry-roan:

I am getting SO annoyed of everywhere my husband and I go - to eat, to shop, to the movies, etc. kids are just out of control.

 I understand this frustration, and I even share it, particularly when me and my hubby get a rare chance to go out on our own.  But my own experiences have made me a little more lax, depending on the situation, in recent years.

Sometimes it's not just as easy as "make it stop."  As the mother of an autistic 5 year old, I can tell you that if I had magic wand to wave every time he encountered one of his triggers, I would use it, because that would certainly be easier than trying to prevent a panick attack under the stares of people assuming I'm bad mother.  Of course, even then, when I can manage it, I try to remove him from the area.

It's not always just a matter of negligent parents that don't know how to disclipline their kids, however, in the case you described, that might have been the case.  I wouldn't have tolerated that for a minute, not that I would have let them start in the first place.

Agreed that there is more grace when a special needs child is involved, but in my personal case, that has never happened...it was "normal" kids that just we not disciplined. 

How do you discipline them. Kids need firm rules and guidelines. If they act that way at a restaurant immediately take them out of the restaurant and take them home and punish them. However you do it. Take privileges away. Things they like the most and be firm. Never give in. Say what you mean and mean what you say. They act that way because you let them. My son did that one time at Wal-Mart, threw a fit when he was about 4 screaming for a Toy he wanted. I left the store, him by the hand put him in the car, drove home and grounded him from his favorite things. Explained what he had done and why it would not be allowed. Then the next day we went back to the store. I reminded him what he had done, what the consequences were and what they would be if he did it again. The biggest thing is being consistent and sticking to your guns. I cannot stand it when I hear parents say if you don't stop I will... Or you better stop it, and never follow through or make idle threats. Totally counterproductive. Kinds need rules, schedule and firm but loving discipline.

Love the replies, thanks.

 

santonacci, I do agree that there are instances where it is not the fault of the child or the parents. I would never say anything if I had any doubt that the child could control their behavior. We know a child with Tourette's and his parents rarely even take him in public, sadly.

It is the parents that just think their kids have the right to be "kids". Maybe so, but not bratty "kids".

Thanks again for reading and responding. Thought I was just getting old and cranky.

 

Original Post by strawberry-roan:

It is the parents that just think there kids have the right to be "kids". Maybe so, but not bratty "kids".

I totally agree - there are boundaries.  Even my 5 year old, apart from his triggers, does have the capability to be run of the mill "brat" if the proper discipline isn't consistently applied.

We were at a nice restaurant celebrating our anniversary and the kids in the next booth were standing up blowing soda at us through their straws! The parents thought they were cute.

I would have spoken directly to the parents and told them that I did not appreciate having soda blown at me through a straw. I would have said it sternly, but politely. If it continued I would have said it louder until the parents were too embarrassed to stay any longer. I don't tolerate that kind of crap from parents out in public.

*coughs* This post is part of why I wish more restaurants, ESPECIALLY NICE restaurants did not allow children.

I'm sorry, but if I'm going to a REALLY nice restaurant, where dinner for the two of us is in excess of $100, than I do not wish to be "entertained" by your precocious preschooler. Get a babysitter. Thank you.

Blowing soda at you? Wow, that is really rude and unsanitary.

Being a mother myself, I wont claim my kiddos are perfect. They have certainly said and done things in public that made me want to crawl in a hole. Kids will do that. :) But I cant imagine not correcting their behavior right away. And to think it's cute? God, I would be mortified if my kids did something like that!

Well, we did say things like, Now that's not nice (and ducked so we wouldn't get wet.) The parents heard us but just ignored our comments and kept on eating.

Next time, don't be passive agressive. Look directly at the parents and ask them to stop their children from doing whatever it is. Make eye contact and be stern but polite. You might get a couple of dirty looks and the parents may make snide little comments that you can hear, but so what. They've already proven they're not worthy of respect. Who gives a rat's behind if they're miffed?

Good point. Luckily, we were about to leave for the movies (don't get me started on kids in the movies).

We were at Burger King earlier in the summer eating my favorite veggie burger when a woman and what appeared to be her twin sister got a table on the far side of the room and sent their five kids in total to a booth right next to us. They didn't even want to sit in the same section as their kids. Several of the kids were fine (the youngest about 3, oldest about 8), just sat there waiting for their food, etc. One was walking in the seat so I told her to sit down, no one wanted to sit where her dirty feet had been. She gave me a dirty look so I said, Do you have a parent present? She pointed to her mom across the way!

The littlest one was LICKING the window. Geez, it was Burger King so we gulped our food and left. I just hate when we have planned a nice night out and it gets disturbed. I hate to make a fight out of it because then the mood of our evening is altered.

What to do, hmm. Stay home and eat frozen pizza I suppose.

 

I agree with the other posters.  Having stuff actually blown at you is very little different from smoking, and I practically guarantee if either of you had been smoking those parents would have raised a fit.  They may not like being called out on it, but they're responsible.