Observations on menopause . . .

Menopause is like going through puberty backwards -- with none of the perks. 

If you understand that statement, feel free to add your observations . . .

LOL - boy do I ever!!  I am turning 41 this year so I am not there yet, but I am in the PERI phase most definitely!!  So far I have had some night sweats - those are fun - but no hot flashes!!  One of my friends never had a symptom....just never got her TOM ever again....I can't tell you what I called her, being in polite company and all but yes it is exactly like going through puberty backwards!  Honestly though, I cannot wait to get to the other side!!  :)

Yes, I am hopefully on the tail end of it.  But, I'm so mad - no period for 6 months, so Sunday I give a brand new, unopened box of tampons to my daughter -- and, guess what!  Tuesday morning I get a visit from Aunt Flo!  ARRRRGGGGGHHHH! 

Let's see, the joys of menopause weight gain, bumbling brain, acne, disproportionate emotional response, I screamed "I hate you" at my husband the other day.  Now, if that's not pubescent I don't know what is. 

edit:  Thankfully, he gets where I'm coming from -- knows that was my evil alter-ego -- and forgave me very quickly. 

***nano***

I'm in the peri- part too I think. Night sweats and occasional heart flutters... irregular periods...  some moodiness and emotionality...

I'm interested in the bio-identical hormone thing, but my insurance doesn't cover it and I'm sure I couldn't afford it...

ah... aging... it aint for sissies!

Woah, that explains why I was crying into my pasta bowl today.  I've been screaming "I hate you", too, but in Italian, gives it a certain flair, and I'm better understood by everyone with their doors and windows open.  Hang on, this is going to be a bumpy ride!

*nomo* --  I decided not to do the HRT thing, but when it got really bad (absolutely out of my mind for about 4-6 months) I wanted to change my mind -- but, it took so long for me to get into see a doctor (couple of months wait) that by the time I did see her I felt that I was over the hump.

For awhile there it was really horrible.  But, to all my peri-menopausal friends, I do believe there is light at the end of the tunnel.  :o)

I want to learn to scream "I hate you" in Italian!  I'm certain it sounds much more romantic.

::giggles::

I just looked it up on a translator...

it said

L'odio!

::giggles::

Excellent --- the closest I could come before you provided that was "NO ME GUSTO!!!!"

heh heh.

off to work now -- will check back soon.  :o)

Oh jeez, maybe I've been saying it wrong all this time then, because when I scream "Ti odio!!" he just laughs at me.  Maybe "L'odio" is using the formal pronoun?  I've gotta arm myself with more offensive things to say in Italian.  I call him a "peasant" but he just laughs at that too, although he tries not to.

Yes indeedy!!! Boy do I understand and relate to this.  I have glibly written and rewritten about this very topic in my journals.  Your catch phrase sums it up beautifully.  Now, allow me to embellish just a bit more.  Unlike the Menstrual Monster which visited us only once a month and finally left home for good, Menopause Monster now takes up permanent residence in our bodies and stays there until we die.  Think of it as a terrible dragon that breathes fire on your neck, cheeks and upper torso (hot flashes), steals your sleep, your memory and your lean muscle tissue and finally, casts an evil spell on you; making you hungry for carbs and sugar to make up for the lack of energy caused by sleepless nights.  With diminishing muscle mass to fight the dragon, we slowly succumb to expanding middles, bra fat, "bat wings", and other physical traits which liken us to Fairy Godmothers instead of Cinderellas.  By the way, has anyone seen my other glass slipper?

Has anybody seen my keys??? I swear I'm losing my mind..man-

I have been going through peri for a few years now...

For the first time in my entire life, this morning, I bought a box of tampons without feeling embarassed...

Internal dialogue:

You are 45 years old, for Pete's sake. Walk tall. No more being embarassed, you are a full grown woman..what are you going to do cower for the rest of your life??? Pretend you don't need "feminine products"...And who thought up that silly-assed name, anyway???

additional thought, while climbing out of the car: With any luck there will be men around that will be embarassed...

 

 Just a thought.... Q: How many women with PMS/ Menopause  does it take to change a light bulb?   Woman's Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY?  Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!!  AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!!  BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!!  IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!!    IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL!!  

I'm sorry. What was the stupid question?   


  

!

 

Hee hee....

OMG -- chris_n_ga -- I'm crying I'm laughing so hard -- and for god sake's I go through that daily -- and I'm not going through anything yet, we think, well, I forget most of the time.

Umm, err .........Darn! I forget what I was going to write.