OMG Realisation - Woop
I have been on such a journey all my life with food and drink and calorie and fat and weight and blah blah, you know the drill.
Something I have come to realise is with this website and through venting my thoughts and readings others I have actually stuck with this, albeit extremely up and down and on n off, I have actually kept with this lifestyle change thought process. I have kept 9lbs off, even though i originally lost 11 and have struggled for the last 5 weeks, which if id stuck with things cud have been another 10lbs loss.
BUT...
I havent given up, I have 11-12yrs of destructive patterns n hateful thoughts to get rid of. I have been desperate at times, very desperate and then extremely happy n high on life. Its been so so emotional and no doubt will continue to be but I just cant believe how far I have come. I've only realised this this morning.
That although i am really strugglin and am desperately tryin to get back on track I am still TRYIN....i've not given up on myself!!!! I've perservered! I just cant believe i havent realised this earlier! I just thought id let myself down for goin off the wagon, so to speak. When really, it was never gonna be a walk in the park, n im actually still here, still strugglin on n stiull tryin to make it work!!!!!!!!!!!
Im positive n im on it n im gonna do this n im not gonna binge this weekend n im gonna pay tribute to myself for having the strength to go through this emotional ride n not give up!! and im gonna do it by being healthy and happy and sheddin 2lbs this week and continuing on the downward spiral over the next few weeks.
GO ME!!! For once ive not given up on myself!! I should be proud and deep down i think i am! Still educating myself against my destructive thoughts....ur fat, uv let yourself down, uve eaten that chocolate bar just give up n stuff etcetc. They are goin! I am feeling that this is a great great beginning of better times n a happier life, a life thats not full of beating myself up over calories....WOW when i reach that then I'll know ive done it!
What a rollercoaster, never truly imagined how deep this would go! Thank god for this website, documenting my thoughts in my hournal n re-readin them when im havin a rough time etc is the best medicine for me and of course the true support and amazing advice from all the guys on here.
Im stickin with this one, for many years to come so good luck to me, and all of you, on this long life commitment to ourselves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its only food, its not to be hated!
:0)))
Good for you! I also realized that even through a months-long stall, I was living healthier than in the past. I've made a lot of good changes over the past year or so and many of them have stuck. I didn't lose, but I didn't regain, either. So I've rededicated my efforts and have less distance to go now, as well as starting from a healthier position in the first place.
Keep up the good work. Your body will appreciate it!
Hi!
You have a great attitude... and yes it's a journey. Changing your life isn't easy but you're taking the challenge... and you're "knockin' em dead tiger!" So keep going!! :)
& big congrats on venting, losing 9lbs, and coaching yourself :)
-Mel
