One of my biggest pet peeves - teaching kids to cook
pgeorgian's post about why no one on here seems to cook much reminded me of one of my long standing pet peeves:
Why don't people teach their kids to cook anymore?!
I am in my late 20's and I have always been the type of girl that loves food. I love to cook. By fourth grade I made all of my family's birthday cakes (except my own) and by high school I made our family dinner a couple times a week all by myself. I never thought that was odd. It has only been in the past few years that I have realized how few friends I have that are really comfortable cooking and most of them that are able to put together a real meal are self taught chefs. The majority of the people I know can throw together a couple random meals like spaghetti using canned sauce, but they would be terrified about trying to make something more complicated even with a clear recipe. So being as nosy as I am, I started asking questions. Of all the people I've asked, I only know one other person who mother taught them the basics of cooking and encouraged them to get in the kitchen and try stuff out.
Who is going to teach these kids to cook if their parents don't? I know people who rarely eat veggies because they are afraid to cook them because they don't know how. I see people on here all the time that struggle to figure out how to prepare healthy food (and kudos to them). It is no wonder so many people live on restaurant food and the convenience foods in the grocery store. And I think that is why american's manage to be so heavy and still don't manage to get all the nutrients everyone needs in their diets for basic health.
Alright, I'll get off my high horse now. Really I am just tired of teaching boyfriends how to cook.
I know what you mean.
My dad sort of taught me how to cook (meat in particular because his dad was a butcher). For the most part I had to figure it out as I tried.
Most of my roommates from this year and last year basically don't make the effort. They do know how to scramble eggs though.
The reason I didn't know how to cook when I went off to college is because my mother never really knew how to cook, either. She had a few recipes she was familiar with and made over and over, and some cookbooks that she felt comfortable trying something new out of occasionally, but she was never a proper cook.
When I was little, we baked together a lot, and one year my brother and I actually made an anniversary dinner for my parents (with careful pre-selecting of the recipe by my mother), but I was never really encouraged to or taught to prepare fully balanced dinners, especially not without following a specific recipe to the letter.
I'm trying to improve! Just wanted to say that in this case, it goes at least one generation further back.
Original Post by saintlymama:
I am a late 20-something who can cook and has taught my son to cook as well. He's five and can make an awesome garlic and dill couscous. His favorite thing to make is buffalo "chicken" tofu because he can cut the tofu himself and needs no extraneous help from me. I don't think that all kids are as clueless as you think.
Good for you for teaching your child to cook! I don't think kids are clueless at all. I just think someone has to get them in the kitchen.
I don't remember really being taught to cook, but I was encouraged to help in the kitchen. My parents would both let me help with little things, and when I got older they allowed me to try out some things by myself. (My first big failure was pancakes!)
When I was in high school I started cooking a lot on my own because I wanted to try a vegetarian diet. I'm no longer a vegetarian, but I still love to cook. I cook for my family (husband and foreign exchange student "daughter") most nights, and am lucky enough to have a husband that will clean up after dinner.
I think that learning to be comfortable in the kitchen is less about being "taught to cook" and more about being exposed to others cooking and learning not to be afraid to try something out. I think that a lot of people don't think they have time to cook, so less kids see their parents cooking.
This is something that drives me nuts. It's worse with the male children... mothers (and fathers!) who don't teach their sons to cook are perpetuating the stupid notion that women belong in the kitchen and that cooking is "women's work". Ugh. I haven't had a boyfriend yet who can cook anything beyond hot dogs and macaroni and cheese from a box, and if I didn't cook it for them, they wouldn't eat veggies at all. I had to teach my current boyfriend to make scrambled eggs this weekend, and since I don't eat them, that meant I had to learn first so I could teach him to make his own! Even when I cook my non-cooking friends often come home with take-out or frozen dinners. And I'm not even going to get into the whole issue of people who don't eat leftovers after I've gone through the trouble of cooking for them... So please please please teach kids to cook and understand how things work in the kitchen... including how to do dishes.
i know that personally, my mom isn't really the greatest cook so she didn't have much to teach me. she basically just followed recipes and does what the box says to do, uses the Betty Crocker cake mixes (etc). she taught me the basics and some shortcuts, but besides that it's all really self-taught.
i understand the annoyance though, barely any of my friends cook. but honestly (including myself), many teenagers don't have the time to cook dinner or learn to cook. but there are many pros to being able to cook your own dinner, especially not having to wait for your parents to get home to start dinner.
My mother did teach me how to cook, she explained recipes and methods to me as she made dinner and we made cakes and cookies together. Of course she stressed kitchen safety.
But she never actually let me practice. If I made any kind of mess at all, like leaving a dirty measuring cup in the sink, she'd go nuts. Even if I cleaned up the kitchen so it was spotless, better than it was before, she would be sure to make some comment about how filthy it was, or if a friend dropped by she'd apologize that the kitchen was a mess because I'd been cooking. She'd ask me if I remembered to use dishsoap when I did the dishes, then pointedly rewash them all. And even days later she'd come to me asking 'where did you put the tarragon?' or 'I wish you'd told me you'd used up all the flour,' and of course nothing I'd made included any of the items she mentioned.
On the plus side, to this day I do not sit down to dinner until I've scrubbed every pan and utensil I used, totally rinsed any cans, etc. I'm not a tidy person otherwise, so that's saying something!
Mom my is a fantastic baker but not much of a cook, but she did teach my sister and I the basics. The baking is almost a natural reward in and of itself so it was easy. Cooking she taught us how to make rice, cook broccoli, frozen peas or corn, spaghetti sauce from browning the meat with onions and adding a jar of sauce (better than the jar by far). It wasn't a lesson exactly, more that she'd ask us to do something in the kitchen while she was making dinner. I don't recall her ever teaching us how to make meat, but I did learn from watching her broil chicken breasts or salmon from time to time. Pepper is actually a spicy spice to her so spices were not something included beyond maybe some rosemary. I still remember calling her the first time I made hard boiled eggs on my own and having to ask her exactly how to do it. I learned how to make omlettes and waffles from my dad and sunnyside up with toast from my mom. Scrambled eggs I didn't learn how to do until my 20s!
And then there was the summer when I was 14 where my mom paid me to cook dinner. $4 a meal and I had a grocery budget...there were a few disasters that arose out of that including the memorable lesson that if you're making a casserole you must cook the meat and the pasta separetely before combining them and baking them...I ended up buying pizza that night!
I'm not a bad cook, but I'm a far cry from a gourmet. When I bake, I could probably sell what I make. I've taught a few friends how to do simple meals from scratch, particularly the broiling since it's so easy.
Original Post by leiann:
Guys who are single in their late 20's or so learn to cook. Think it is the fact that they are out of college, have a "real" job, on their own and no one to cook for them so it's eat out breakfast, lunch and dinner 7 days a week or learn to cook and have found that majority make some sort of effort so there is hope yet for you young ladies here. I always dated a few years older so every relationship I have been in has consisted of equal time in the kitchen (I think one guy was even better than me and I'm a darn good cook). I agree though that people are in an absolute hurry to go no where and have all the time to sit at applebee's for 2 hours but no time to whip up a 20 minute meal!
I think you're right. I had to learn at 21 because I moved out and didn't have anyone else to make food for me. I am not the world's greatest cook, but I've never given myself food poisoning, so that has to count for something.
At the same time, I notice most my roommates eat out of boxes. I'm not sure how long they can keep that up, but they're perfectly content doing that for the time being.
Ironically when I'm visiting my parents, my mom goes ballistic if she sees me making anything, while my dad tells me I should cook for him.
My mom is a phenomenal cook, and my dad's no slouch in the kitchen either, but I never had a desire to emulate them because I was a terribly picky eater. I didn't like anything they prepared, so I didn't care to learn how to make those dishes.
Now my tastebuds have "matured," as Mom and Dad promised they would, and I wish I'd paid closer attention when I hung out in the kitchen as a kid. I would love to know how to make things like my mom's all-purpose frozen stock cubes, as they're a staple for making sauces. I almost want to move back in with her to absorb cooking skills via osmosis! I'm a decent cook, and a good baker, but I'd be better if I'd been more interested in my mom's methods when I was younger and lived with her.
My mom is a great cook (and baker) and she liked to have us kids in the kitchen while she worked. She taught me how to bake, but I think I learned how to cook mostly by watching. It became a matter of survival later on, when she went back to school while continuing to work full time. We had plenty of nights that were "fend for yourself" and we were all expected to take turns making dinner. I could make scrambled eggs at age 7 (standing on a stool to reach the stove) and I could cook basic meals (homemade spaghetti sauce and boiling up some noodles) by the time I was 10 or 11. Of course, we were also expected to do our own laundry and help clean the house. I am so grateful she took the time to teach us these skills because moving into my own apartment was not at all stressful for me.
I think sometimes people want their kids to "remain kids" and not have to worry about housework or cooking chores. It does them a disservice later on, because they eventually have to learn on their own and it is much more intimidating.
I've found that many of the notions that cooking from scratch is time-consuming and expensive are (mostly) untrue. I've found it costs considerably less, if you know how to shop wisely. As for saving time, it's faster for me to make something simple and tasty at home than it is to get in the car, drive to a restaurant, wait for my food to arrive, eat, and drive back home. Prepping meals ahead of time is a huge time saver.
As for fear of failure, I've burned or screwed up my fair share of recipes, it's all just part of the learning curve. I'm certainly not an expert, and I'm always learning as well. I can't wait to teach my kids how to cook someday.
David, was your mom a stay at home mom? Your roomates will snap out of it or meet a girl that likes to cook, can't live out of boxed junk forever...or they'll just become chubby little fellas!
Original Post by leiann:
David, was your mom a stay at home mom? Your roomates will snap out of it or meet a girl that likes to cook, can't live out of boxed junk forever...or they'll just become chubby little fellas!
No, both my parents worked full time. On the whole, let's just say, it's rare that I miss her food, except for a few things that she makes really really well. Nutritionally it is as poor as humanly possible (heavy usage of margarine for frying, food often cooks in its own fat; no veggies). My dad's food is more balanced.
And about my roommates - half of them are women!
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