When other people encourage you to be anorexic...

Okay so. All my family members insist me to gain weight, which Im doing right now.

BUT, all my friends at school and many strangers always seem to be like "ohh youre so skinny, I envy you", "I wish I was like you", and when I let them know Im gaining, they go all like "WHAT?! Why on earth?", "I wouldn't do that if I was you". This hits me very bad and every time I get nice comments about me looking like a skeleton Im on the edge of relapse. Until my grandma screams at me when I get out of the shower, thats when I get back to my senses and go eat my PB.

It also seems like people think being underweight is The Thing. Like it's okay and only like a permission to eat anything you want, not a serious health risk.

maybe you shouldn't share the gaining aspect with everyone without an explaination like... "i feel so tired and unhealthy at this weight"

try to keep a positive outlook and remind yourself why you are on this journey.. its also good to share with others because, who knows, maybe some of those girls are struggling with anorexia themselves. many times when people do things they know are bad, and they look to others to enable them and make them not feel guilty about their own choices

I have the same struggle when people tell me i'm so lucky and i look good, granted i've already gained about 13 pounds or so, but i still have more to gain. it seems like it's okay for me to stop where i'm at since i fit into my pants now and i don't look like a stick but i know that i'm not there yet and I will still look great when i gain another 5 pounds, only difference is that those 5 pounds will also make me healthier, whereas being underweight only carries the benefit of vanity. Most likely you will look better weighing more, and in their minds they just can't wrap their heads around why ANYONE would want to gain, and it's not really specific to you, it's just that the goal is usually the opposite so to hear someone say they want to gain is kinda shocking and people don't know how to respond. they don't realize that they're talking to someone who is sick from anorexia, and not someone who is naturally thin, but still healthy. there's a huge difference, which makes me realize my goals and stand by them regardless of what people say. if you ever need support feel free to private message me!! I hope this helped :)

Don't listen to the kids your age. Most girls in your age bracket have it in their head that the skinnier, the luckier. They don't realize the immense and life-threatening health complications that can (and will!) come from being drastically underweight. They cannot even begin to understand the concept that thin can kill, that it will destroy their bones, make their hair fall out, and cause them to be weak and sickly. They envy you because they see thinness as something that means you must love your body and be comfortable with it, meanwhile they are struggling to accept themselves. They don't realize that being thin does not mean you are happy, but they assume you must be. These kids don't know that you struggle every bit as much, if not more, with your body image and the way you feel about yourself. In their minds, you should be happy with yourself because you don't look like them.

As a note, I died in my sleep when I was 16 years old. Fortunately, I was in a hospital at that time was brought back to life. Do not think for a second that your friends would ever know that it was possible for that to happen. Most people are quite unaware of how serious being underweight can be. This is due to our society's over-focus on the perils of being overweight. You should try educatiing your friends and explaining to them that there is a difference between someone who is thin but healthy, and someone who is killing themselves by being malnourished and dangerously underweight.

I totally feel this. I'm not nor have I ever been anorexic, but I feel like I was on the path to it when I started dieting unhealthily. I'm still underweight but I'm trying to gain desperately by upping my calorie count. The only thing is, all my insanely thin friends and even my family, who come from a different time and culture where very thin = very good. I just try push that to the back of my head and focus on eating more. I definately get the compliments too - since I lost about 10 pounds within the past 3 or so months. It definately has to do with the focus on weight loss everywhere and the idea of weight gain seems like the most backwards, perverse concept. Just don't let all those outside voices to bring you down - listen to your body.

Agh, every one thought I looked great when I was too thin as well!

I remember going into a shop once, and the shop assistant had a great time watching me try clothes on, she thought my body just looked “ so good” in everything….

That was when I was a teen, as I got older it looked worse as I had lost my thick teenage hair and was not attractive any more.

Remember, being very thin is so unattainable for most people that when they see some one who has achieved this “elusive look” they cannot understand why you would want to throw it all away!

It is just ignorance, you know this, you know what is healthy for your body. Having a lot of fats and eating natural clean foods will give you beautiful skin so there are a lot of other ways you can look lovely that do not involve being a stick.

I know how outside comments are but you have to focus on your needs to be healthy. Many people have no clue and when someone asks you possibly if you feel comfortable if you say you have some health issues and gaining weight will help that. You are not just your body and what will make you beutiful is a full life. Try to focus on what you want to gain in your life with life goals like school,work etc. Also that when you gain weight you will have more color,nicer skin/hair,fill your clothes in nice fashion.

Wow, I know EXACTLY how you feel. I have such mixed feelings about my body, one minute I'll be thinking "oh I don't know anyone else this skinny, maybe it makes me unique, maybe people like it" and the next I'll think "oh god I look so disgusting I need to gain" and then I go and eat some high calorie food but the "oh I like being so skinny" gets back into my head and I feel so guilty for it. Oh when people tell me that I'm so gorgeous, I'm like a model. I like being told that I look like a model, but when I see my friends that look healthy and well fed, and hear my family calling me anorexic, it's so hard to just give up that "oh you look so skinny!".

I KNOW!!! I always feel like I must deserve to be in a mental institution for multiple personality disorder or something-I have two toatlly different midsets inside my head, it's awful and confusing. I can see myself in the mirror after a shower, and be disgusted by how thin I am, then just a mere half an hour later, see nothing but a fat girl. Don't misunderstand, in my right mind, i'm definatly gaining, and I WANT that, if not for vanity, than for my health an well-being. I just get conflicting thoughts. One moment, I will want nothing more tahn to gain, look healthy, life a normal life, and be happy. Others, I am DESPERATE to stay so thin, if not even thinner because if nothing else, it sets me apart.

It kills me, how people think it's ok to just talk about your weight if you are thin. I get both positive and negative thingsfrom people about my weight all the time. I love getting the comments and questions from people asking "are you a model, you're so skinny and tall?!?!" it makes me second geuss myself, if i truly want to gain. sadly though, I get disgusted or negative looks and comments about my weight or what i eat, etc. I let it all affect me WAY to much, and i'm working on reminding myself taht those people really are just naive and it doesnt even matter what they think.....as much as i want to change my line of thinking, I'll be the first to admit that its a hard thing to do. People are cruel, sometimes without meaning to be so, other times-they know. I'll never forget, a copule months ago, I was carrying two plates of cheesecake (I was waitressing BTW) and a man walked by me and said "Girl, you're gonna get fat" as he walked by. I BALLED for an hour after that-i feel pretty silly admitting that now, but it just goes to show the power of words.