Has any other woman ever thought this about Pregnancy and... ?

This is kind of strange but, it was sparked by a convo I had last night with my girlfriend so I'm curious to see what others think...
I'm 22 with a serious bf (of 4 years, who I live with) so the topic of marriage and kids does come up sometimes.... Only when it does I get to thinking about being pregnant and it freaks me out. 
The first thing I think of is "Omg, I need to lose weight before that happens or Ill never be able to lose it."  I'm wayyy too young (in my mind) to be havin any babies, or to even get married, but it still sends me into some kind of panic mode, like I've gotta lose it all right now just in case.  Lol.

Is this a normal reaction for someone my age or am I just nuts? :)
(and does it really destroy your body beyond repair?... can't beleive i just asked that, ha.)

 

I got pregnant when I was 20, and I weighed 113lbs (I'm 5'7")... I ballooned up to 180lbs. My son turned five last month, and I am STILL struggling to lose the weight. I am pretty much stuck at 140. I'll dip down as low as 137, but then within the next couple of days, I'm right back at 141.

I don't think it has anything to do with how much you weigh WHEN you get pregnant, but how much you gain WHILE pregnant, and how quickly you gain it.

hey picchick, i am also 22 and i understand where you are coming from. while i dont have a long term bf, the thought of marriage and pregnancy does freak me out at this age. i definately want kids, but sometimes i feel so shallow for thinking about how it changes your body when the bigger picture is being capable to bring someone into this world. also, as a 22 year old i am not content with my body, so it freaks me out to think of want my body is going to look like after a baby!!

lol, it's mad reading your post. I am exactly the same!

I have a long term boyfriend of 2 years, and we do occasionally talk about marraige and babies. I have thought the exact thing 'I better lose weight before I think of having babies'. You always hear how hard it is to lose weight after having a baby. imagine how hard it would be if you needed to lose weight to begin with!I'm with you on that one! 

Sometimes the thought of labour actually makes me feel scared. If it's that time of the month, and I have particularly bad cramps, i think to myself, 'Dear god, if this is bad, imagine what labour would be like!'

you know, sometimes i see women who are pregnant (like..REALLY pregnant...) and they look so cute...i mean if you saw them from the back you can't even tell they are pregnant.  i always told myself that that's what i will look like.  i guess we'll see.  it probably takes a lot of dedication and when you're pregnant i'm sure it's hard to count calories w/ all the weird cravings!  but i'm sure if you keep up and exercise during your pregnancy (they even have yoga for pregnant women) it will be ok.

but i know it's possible. they have such cute maternity clothes now too!!

I'm 23 and am in the same boat as you.  I also have a long term bf, and we have been talking about kids and marriage.  I plan to eat healthy and exercise before we get married so that when it is time for kids, I am at a healthy weight.  I also plan to exercise during my pregnancies so that I maintain a healthy weight.  Obviously you are going to gain weight when you are pregnant, but it's up to you to decide if it will be baby weight or ice cream and cookie weight! LOL! 

I'm 23 and engaged, but not planning on trying for any kids until I'm about 27.  I want them, but I completely understand the "Not right now!" thing.  I have a variety of reasons for loosing weight, from looking better in my wedding dress a couple years from now, to avoiding some of the medical conditions that are genetic on both sides my family, to yes being at a healthy weight for when I get pregnant.  An aunt of mine actually went on a diet and exercise plan before trying to get pregnant with her second child because actually after her first pregnancy she put on a fair bit of weight, and the doctor said that very likely was part of why she was having trouble getting pregnant and regulating her cycles without meds, compared to before her first pregnancy.

My mother was a fluke I think, both times she was pregnant she actually LOST 20lbs between before and after childbirth. And while she was pregnant with me she at as many ginger snap cookies as my dad could keep in the house, I certainly hope my metabolism will jump like that when I have a child

The thing is, it's never a bad thing to be healthy for whatever your reasons.  And I think being in our early 20s it's a time when we're all looking ahead, planning our futures. Yeah, we may not want kids yet, we may not want to be married yet, or all those other things we associate with having grown up, but we're thinking about it, and we're planning for it (even if it's subcontiously).  So maybe that little panic button is there to give us a kick start, so that 5 years from now we won't be wishing we were thinner or whatever and had started taking care of it ages ago, when slow healthy improvement was perfectly acceptable and there wasn't some kind of time crunch.

That's my plan to. count calories when pregnant, and still do some exercise. I think that you only need about 500 cals extra or something like that when your pregnant.

BUT, i bet those cravings are killer! We all have good intentions, but thik of those days we your are just SO hungry - it's hard not to eat. Or those times around the time of the month when you WANT chocolate. We might manage to beat that because really it's only for a few days. imagine 9 months of that!

lol, when us 23 yr olds do get married and get pregnant, we will be setting up our own support group!!

I'm 52 next month. I have six children, the youngest are 16-year-old twins. So I was 36 when they were born. They were both over 8 pounds... a total of 16.5 pounds of baby weight.  I went full-term and was shaped like a torpedo in front.  After each pregnancy, I got back down to a weight I was happpy with. I was careful to not gain too much with each pregnancy, always had big babies... biggest was 9 pounds 15 ounces.  My stomach has never quite been the same since the last pregnancy... always a little excess skin.

I am currently 128 pounds... the lowest of my adult life, also the best shape, and strongest.  I have been maintaining for 18 months on about 1500 calories a day. I go to the gym three tiems a week, and do a free weights class. This includes abdominal exercises.  I've been doing this almost 2 years.  Yes, my stomach muscles are stronger, but still have that excess skin. .. like, if I pinch it when relaxed, it's two inches.  So I don't wear a bikini... otherwise look slim and trim, with flat tummy. It is really amazing how your body rebounds so quickly after pregnancy.  It's all a matter of whether or not you decide you want to get your former body back.

My last pregnancy was unplanned but not an "accident." I accepted pregnancy as a possible outcome of being sexually active.  At 36, you would think my fertility rate was low.  We were using birth control.  It was a chaotic month and, well, at the risk of TMI, the ships passed just once in the night that month. I know people who have gotten pregnant on all different forms of birth control... this includes highly educated responsible people using the pill. One friend got pregnant three times, each time with a different form of birth control.  Just thought I would pass this along.

Treanop2  - I actually think my mum was lucky on the craving front, with both me and my sister she had one particular thing that she craved on a regular basis, so it was a little easier to control.  My future sister-in-law had what we dubbed "You have it so I want it" syndrom when she was preggers last year.  She and Hugh would have these well balanced meals all planned out, but if she stopped by and we were eating take out, you can be sure they'd be stopping for takeout on their way home instead.  You can imagine what kind of problems that could throw into diet planning!

I was 26 years old & 120 when I got pregnant with my first child.  I gained 85 lbs during pregnancy.  I never struggled with eating until I was pregnant.  It was either the cravings or everyone around me telling me, "you're eating for two".  I was able to lose a lot of weight after my first one, but never got lower than 160.  I then got pregnant with my second child after a few years.  I then gained another 75 lbs during that pregnancy.  I was able to lose 60 lbs after a few years, but again, not below 165-170 lbs.  At 31 I got pregnant with my third child.  I was 170 when I got pregnant and gained 60 lbs.  (better than the last two, but still a lot)  I delivered at 230.   For reasons of the unknown, this time being in my thirties, I haven't been able to lose much weight.  I'm did get down to 195, but I'm back up to 210.   It's so much harder losing weight in your thirties,  I think.  (not sure...but that's what it seems like) 

I would highly encourage you to do three things:

1. Get in a regular exercise program and do not part from it prior to getting pregnant.

2. Under your doctor's supervision, stay on that exercise program during pregnancy for the most part.

3.  Don't believe anyone around you that "you have to eat double portions" because you are carrying another human inside you.  Keep your cravings satisfied with "good foods"; rather than "empty calories".

I say all this from my regrets.  I hope it helps and encourages you into the next chapter of your life.

shiptona,

After reading your post I got slightly freaked out. 

But to avoid pregnancy, I use the Pill, but also make my boyfriend use a condom. I may be a freak, but at 26 I have no intention of getting pregnant any time soon!!

Shiptona, it's so nice to know others on this board are over 40! I'm 47, and have two sons two years apart. The first pregnancy was a bit of a surprise--I forgot my diaphram one night (one time) six months after we got married. That son is now 26.

I was in the military then and stayed very active throughout my pregnancy (haha had to, thanks to PT). The second pregnancy was planned, and I worked out during that one too (although not as much as I did with the first one--I wasn't in the military any more).

I gained more weight with the second pregnancy (30 pounds instead of 25) but the real difficulty for me was in keeping the weight off after I stopped nursing my babies. Man when you nurse, you BURN through the calories. And when you STOP nursing, well your body still thinks you should eat that much food.

So yeah, chiming in to say establish the healthy eating plans now, along with the regular exercise program, and you will have a much easier time controlling your weight while pregnant and afterwards too.

I get the "OMG! I need to be healthier and thinner before I have a baby", somewhere in between the "OMG! I need to get further in my career/buy a house/get my PhD degree/sort my worldview out to provide a proper moral framework for the kid!" thoughts.

The whole thing seems unbelivably daunting. But I definitely feel I need to be fitter before I even try.

Ladies ~

I am 30 and am not yet a mother; however, the three reasons for me loosing weight (197 on 7.2 and 186.1 today) are: develop healthy eating and exercise habits today to live a long life and avoid many of my genetic pitfalls, look good in my wedding dress next year, get pregnant at a healthy weight so I can keep up the program throughout and after pregnancy. Having said that all throughout my twenties and even late teens, even before I had a bf I had always planned on being a mother someday...so what you are thinking and feeling is normal. The difference is, you ladies are smart enough to consider all the implications and get yourselves healthy now, while I waited and figured I had plenty of time to do that and am now under the gun. The reality is if I was at a healthy weight now and satisfied with my body Scott and I would probably already be married and trying for a baby. Good for all you ladies that are thinking about the future. 

Make it a great day!

Smiles, Dacia

Hi there I can't tell you if your body will be screwed up by pregnancy or not but I definitely know about OMG I'm too young for a baby - jitters.

I am in the same boat, partner for 3 years now and have talked marriage and babies. Marriage doesn't freak me out but the baby thing does, I am not done living my life yet and I will only seriously consider getting pregnant in 4-5 years time, when I'm 30 to 32 years old. Problem is he's three years older than me and my does he have a biological clock every now and then.

If you are not ready for either babies and marriage, you need to tell your boyfriend that, the worst thing is to give him false hope and be miserable about It, honesty goes a long way around serious subjects like that.

It doesn't have to do with you not loving him (or does It?) but if you are not ready for whatever reason he should know.

I'm in my early twenties, and my hubby and I are going to start trying at Christmas.  I live in a very young apartment complex, all married students, so I am surrounded by young mothers.  Every single one says the healthier you are before, the easier the pregnancy is, and better you will bounce back later.  In addition to things like getting finances in control and finishing grad school, I am trying to get healthy.  It only seems natural to want my baby to have a healthy mama.

i am 44 i was 23 when i had my first child, about 6mos before i got preg. i was 230 lbs wearing 18/20 clothes went on a diet lost weight starting wearing a 5, got pregnant was terrified that i was never going to lose the weight because i gained 40lbs while preg. we were in the hospital 10 days before coming home i was just shy of fitting into my size 5, i have no stretch marks even after a 2nd child no stretch marks, i didnt start gaining weight till i had my hystorectomy (in four parts) i have to say there in nothing like having your own child its all worth it i did it twice and almost lost my life after the first one(didnt know i had a heart condition) i actually had to gain weight after my second child because it just kept coming off lol i wish it would do that now

i say get married have lots of babies  

I was 21 when I got pregnant, 22 when I had my son.  I started at 150 and was 215 the day I gave birth...65 lbs!!  I hung around 165 for about a year and a half (I lost that weight naturally without watching my food or exercise) but then decided I was sick of the weight.  I started working out and just eating well...not starving myself and dropped down to 142.  This was about 4 years ago.  I slowly got back up to 162 and that's why I'm here now. 

I think the early in life you have children the easier it is to lose the weight...also how much weight you gain during.  I will for sure watch what I eat on the next one!  I ate like crap...which isn't only bad for you, it's bad for the baby.

Breastfeeding is a good way to lose weight afterwards!!!

I'm 25.

I've a bf for 6 yrs now, who I lived with for 2 years. He has never talked aout marriage or babies, so now I don't even have the chance of getting freaked out:(

Hey, I'm 34 1/2 and still haven't had children - been married for 7 years now.  I am trying like mad to lose weight that I had gained over the past 5 years.  When I first got married, I ran a lot and followed a sensible diet.  I was down to 118 lbs. at 5'4".  I went up to 165 lbs. because I couldn't continue running due to knee injuries.  I have been exercising like crazy and trying to eat properly and went down to 135 lbs. but am now back at 146 lbs today!!!  I can't seem to keep it off (or lose it again) and my husband has been talking about us finally starting a family.  If I get pregnant now, I may be at this weight or more for the rest of my life!! I am scared !!!  I wish I could get back down to even the 120's!!!!!   Once you are past 30, it is much harder!!   What to do???